"Did you hear that?" Binky marveled. "Dwayne used to be a girl."
"We'd better stay away from him," Sue Ellen suggested to Francine. "It might be contagious."
Dwayne slowly stood up from the bench, his face a mask of horrified embarrassment. He had let slip too much in the earshot of his four friends, and he needed an excuse immediately. Muffy had abandoned him, but he didn't need her--he was every bit as clever as she was.
"Uh, that's not what I said," he tried to explain. "I said, I understand girls perfectly, as if I used to be one."
"No boy understands girls perfectly," said Francine skeptically.
"Now that you mention it," Buster remarked, "he does act kinda girlish."
"You should know," quipped Sue Ellen.
"Maybe he's really a girl in disguise," Binky theorized.
"Well, he did walk into the girls' room by accident," Francine added.
Dwayne could endure no more of their humiliation. "You are so rude," he said haughtily, and walked away.
"Whoa," mused Binky as he watched the boy depart. "He sounded just like Muffy when he said that."
As morning recess arrived, the kids in Mr. Ratburn's class were exchanging wild ideas about Dwayne and his true origins.
"He looks like Muffy, he talks like Muffy, he acts like Muffy," Buster related to Brain as they were constructing a castle in the sandbox. "It's like aliens abducted Muffy and switched her into a boy."
"I don't believe his story," said Brain. "Nobody gets rich by being a steelworker. And if he really is rich, then he should live in a mansion, and mansions are always located in residential areas, and a highway wouldn't be built through a residential area unless it's a raised highway, which means the exhaust from the cars shouldn't even reach him, because exhaust rises."
"Maybe he's a Muffy clone," Buster suggested.
Brain shook his head. "A clone of Muffy would be a girl. Besides, cloning humans is illegal."
"Why?" asked Buster.
Brain shrugged. "It just is."
"Do you think it should be?" Buster pressed him.
Brain made a sweep with his hand, knocking down one of the castle towers. "Oops," he said apologetically. "Clumsy me."
Their conversation was overheard by Prunella, who happened to be walking past the sandbox. She carefully pondered what the boys had said as she strolled idly through the playground.
When she located Dwayne, the boy was on a bench with a history book clutched tightly in his hands. Upon a closer look, she noticed that the opened book contained a magazine on male modeling. "Hi, Dwayne," she said warmly.
Dwayne quickly slammed the book shut. "Uh, hi, Prunella."
The rat girl took a seat next to him. "I was hoping for a chance to get to know you better," she said with a friendly tone.
"Yeah," Dwayne grumbled. "You and all the other..."
Without asking permission, Prunella grasped his hand and pulled it closer to her. She ran her fingers along his palm, making faint noises in her throat as if to indicate that what she saw interested her.
"What are you doing?" asked Dwayne, trying to not make it obvious that he already knew.
After a few seconds, Prunella relaxed her grip on Dwayne's hand. "The lines in your palm," she said seriously. "They're exactly like Muffy's."
Dwayne held his peace, fearing anything he might say would reveal his secret.
"And your skin," Prunella went on. "It's perfectly smooth, as if you were born yesterday."
"Um, yeah," said Dwayne a bit nervously. "We have servants who do all the hard work."
"From the looks of it, you've never even handled a pencil before," Prunella remarked. "You're a clone, aren't you?"
Dwayne's throat knotted up. He struggled against the urge to panic.
"Don't worry," Prunella reassured him. "I won't tell the police."
It became clear to Dwayne that he could hide nothing from the observant Prunella. "It's true," he admitted quietly, hanging his head. "I'm a clone of Muffy. I wanted a boy who liked the same things I did, so I created me."
Prunella's tone became hushed. "Omigosh...you're really Muffy in there?"
Dwayne nodded sadly.
"Of all the horrible things that could happen to a girl," Prunella mused sympathetically. Then she grinned. "What's it like?"
"Ask me again after gym class," said Dwayne flatly.
As the two conversed, Muffy approached their bench. "There you are, Dwayne," she called to the boy. "Music class is coming up, and I thought we might practice for a violin duet."
Prunella glared indignantly at the girl. "Dwayne told me everything," she said accusingly. "How could you do such a thing to yourself?"
Muffy only shrugged.
"You're a selfish little brat," Prunella chided her. "You created a girl in a boy's body just so you could have a like-minded playmate. Well, maybe Dwayne doesn't want to play with you anymore."
A new idea struck Dwayne's mind like a bolt from the sky. Why hadn't he thought of it before?
"That's right," he said, his confidence growing. "I don't want to play with you anymore, Muffy."
The monkey girl shot him an incredulous glance.
"From now on, Prunella's my best friend," Dwayne announced proudly. "She knows the truth about me, and she's okay with it."
As Prunella nodded in agreement, Muffy's eyes widened in shock.
"But...but you can't do that!" she stammered. "You're my clone! I created you to be my friend!"
Dwayne and Prunella smirked mockingly at her.
"Fine," groused Muffy, placing her hands on her hips. "But you'll come crawling back to me by the end of the day, mark my words." Having said that, she stormed away.
"Another satisfied customer," quipped Dwayne.
"Have you seen the new Talking Polly Locket dolls?" Prunella asked him in a gleeful tone of voice.
"Yeah, they're great," Dwayne replied.
The pair spent most of their free time together, and after school they met for ice cream sodas at the Sugar Bowl.
"Rubella and I have tickets for Kresblaine's next show," Prunella related between sips from her straw. "I was thinking of asking Muffy if she could get us backstage passes, but she's so selfish, she'd probably charge me an arm and a leg."
"Don't be so hard on her," Dwayne responded. "Remember, whatever you say about her, you say about me."
"Unless I say she's a girl," Prunella rejoined.
Dwayne tried his best to giggle, but only a chuckle came out.
"Back to my original question," said Prunella. "What's it like being a boy?"
"Why do you want to know? Are you thinking of trying it?"
"No, I'm just curious."
As Dwayne weighed his answer, Arthur and Francine stopped in front of his table.
"Check it out," said Arthur curiously. "Dwayne and Prunella."
"I guess he's a boy after all," Francine remarked.
"I know what you're thinking," said Dwayne, narrowing his eyes. "Prunella is not my boy...er, girlfriend."
"I believe you," said Francine insincerely, and she followed Arthur to another table.
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," said Dwayne, his tone one of annoyance. "I've only been a boy for a day. How can I have a girlfriend already?"
"There's one other thing I wanted to ask you," said Prunella.
Dwayne held his breath while the rat girl glanced around furtively.
Prunella leaned closer and spoke in a half-whisper. "When you were a girl, did you...you know..."
"What?"
"Did you...like a boy?"
At first taken aback by the question, Dwayne sighed and lowered his eyes.
"Brain," he admitted.
Prunella held back a gasp.
"I liked Brain," Dwayne confessed. "I had this fantasy that we were married, and he did his scientific stuff, and I modeled fashions, and I made all the money." He sighed again, more glumly this time. "But now it will never happen."
Prunella sipped her soda and looked attentively at the boy.
"I took lengthy notes about all the boys I knew," Dwayne went on. "I compared and contrasted them, and it wasn't easy to pick a favorite, but Brain eventually bubbled to the top. He's a little nerdy, but he's got a heart of gold." He thoughtfully turned his soda glass with his fingers. "Now I'll have to start all over again, with the girls."
----
to be continued
"We'd better stay away from him," Sue Ellen suggested to Francine. "It might be contagious."
Dwayne slowly stood up from the bench, his face a mask of horrified embarrassment. He had let slip too much in the earshot of his four friends, and he needed an excuse immediately. Muffy had abandoned him, but he didn't need her--he was every bit as clever as she was.
"Uh, that's not what I said," he tried to explain. "I said, I understand girls perfectly, as if I used to be one."
"No boy understands girls perfectly," said Francine skeptically.
"Now that you mention it," Buster remarked, "he does act kinda girlish."
"You should know," quipped Sue Ellen.
"Maybe he's really a girl in disguise," Binky theorized.
"Well, he did walk into the girls' room by accident," Francine added.
Dwayne could endure no more of their humiliation. "You are so rude," he said haughtily, and walked away.
"Whoa," mused Binky as he watched the boy depart. "He sounded just like Muffy when he said that."
As morning recess arrived, the kids in Mr. Ratburn's class were exchanging wild ideas about Dwayne and his true origins.
"He looks like Muffy, he talks like Muffy, he acts like Muffy," Buster related to Brain as they were constructing a castle in the sandbox. "It's like aliens abducted Muffy and switched her into a boy."
"I don't believe his story," said Brain. "Nobody gets rich by being a steelworker. And if he really is rich, then he should live in a mansion, and mansions are always located in residential areas, and a highway wouldn't be built through a residential area unless it's a raised highway, which means the exhaust from the cars shouldn't even reach him, because exhaust rises."
"Maybe he's a Muffy clone," Buster suggested.
Brain shook his head. "A clone of Muffy would be a girl. Besides, cloning humans is illegal."
"Why?" asked Buster.
Brain shrugged. "It just is."
"Do you think it should be?" Buster pressed him.
Brain made a sweep with his hand, knocking down one of the castle towers. "Oops," he said apologetically. "Clumsy me."
Their conversation was overheard by Prunella, who happened to be walking past the sandbox. She carefully pondered what the boys had said as she strolled idly through the playground.
When she located Dwayne, the boy was on a bench with a history book clutched tightly in his hands. Upon a closer look, she noticed that the opened book contained a magazine on male modeling. "Hi, Dwayne," she said warmly.
Dwayne quickly slammed the book shut. "Uh, hi, Prunella."
The rat girl took a seat next to him. "I was hoping for a chance to get to know you better," she said with a friendly tone.
"Yeah," Dwayne grumbled. "You and all the other..."
Without asking permission, Prunella grasped his hand and pulled it closer to her. She ran her fingers along his palm, making faint noises in her throat as if to indicate that what she saw interested her.
"What are you doing?" asked Dwayne, trying to not make it obvious that he already knew.
After a few seconds, Prunella relaxed her grip on Dwayne's hand. "The lines in your palm," she said seriously. "They're exactly like Muffy's."
Dwayne held his peace, fearing anything he might say would reveal his secret.
"And your skin," Prunella went on. "It's perfectly smooth, as if you were born yesterday."
"Um, yeah," said Dwayne a bit nervously. "We have servants who do all the hard work."
"From the looks of it, you've never even handled a pencil before," Prunella remarked. "You're a clone, aren't you?"
Dwayne's throat knotted up. He struggled against the urge to panic.
"Don't worry," Prunella reassured him. "I won't tell the police."
It became clear to Dwayne that he could hide nothing from the observant Prunella. "It's true," he admitted quietly, hanging his head. "I'm a clone of Muffy. I wanted a boy who liked the same things I did, so I created me."
Prunella's tone became hushed. "Omigosh...you're really Muffy in there?"
Dwayne nodded sadly.
"Of all the horrible things that could happen to a girl," Prunella mused sympathetically. Then she grinned. "What's it like?"
"Ask me again after gym class," said Dwayne flatly.
As the two conversed, Muffy approached their bench. "There you are, Dwayne," she called to the boy. "Music class is coming up, and I thought we might practice for a violin duet."
Prunella glared indignantly at the girl. "Dwayne told me everything," she said accusingly. "How could you do such a thing to yourself?"
Muffy only shrugged.
"You're a selfish little brat," Prunella chided her. "You created a girl in a boy's body just so you could have a like-minded playmate. Well, maybe Dwayne doesn't want to play with you anymore."
A new idea struck Dwayne's mind like a bolt from the sky. Why hadn't he thought of it before?
"That's right," he said, his confidence growing. "I don't want to play with you anymore, Muffy."
The monkey girl shot him an incredulous glance.
"From now on, Prunella's my best friend," Dwayne announced proudly. "She knows the truth about me, and she's okay with it."
As Prunella nodded in agreement, Muffy's eyes widened in shock.
"But...but you can't do that!" she stammered. "You're my clone! I created you to be my friend!"
Dwayne and Prunella smirked mockingly at her.
"Fine," groused Muffy, placing her hands on her hips. "But you'll come crawling back to me by the end of the day, mark my words." Having said that, she stormed away.
"Another satisfied customer," quipped Dwayne.
"Have you seen the new Talking Polly Locket dolls?" Prunella asked him in a gleeful tone of voice.
"Yeah, they're great," Dwayne replied.
The pair spent most of their free time together, and after school they met for ice cream sodas at the Sugar Bowl.
"Rubella and I have tickets for Kresblaine's next show," Prunella related between sips from her straw. "I was thinking of asking Muffy if she could get us backstage passes, but she's so selfish, she'd probably charge me an arm and a leg."
"Don't be so hard on her," Dwayne responded. "Remember, whatever you say about her, you say about me."
"Unless I say she's a girl," Prunella rejoined.
Dwayne tried his best to giggle, but only a chuckle came out.
"Back to my original question," said Prunella. "What's it like being a boy?"
"Why do you want to know? Are you thinking of trying it?"
"No, I'm just curious."
As Dwayne weighed his answer, Arthur and Francine stopped in front of his table.
"Check it out," said Arthur curiously. "Dwayne and Prunella."
"I guess he's a boy after all," Francine remarked.
"I know what you're thinking," said Dwayne, narrowing his eyes. "Prunella is not my boy...er, girlfriend."
"I believe you," said Francine insincerely, and she followed Arthur to another table.
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," said Dwayne, his tone one of annoyance. "I've only been a boy for a day. How can I have a girlfriend already?"
"There's one other thing I wanted to ask you," said Prunella.
Dwayne held his breath while the rat girl glanced around furtively.
Prunella leaned closer and spoke in a half-whisper. "When you were a girl, did you...you know..."
"What?"
"Did you...like a boy?"
At first taken aback by the question, Dwayne sighed and lowered his eyes.
"Brain," he admitted.
Prunella held back a gasp.
"I liked Brain," Dwayne confessed. "I had this fantasy that we were married, and he did his scientific stuff, and I modeled fashions, and I made all the money." He sighed again, more glumly this time. "But now it will never happen."
Prunella sipped her soda and looked attentively at the boy.
"I took lengthy notes about all the boys I knew," Dwayne went on. "I compared and contrasted them, and it wasn't easy to pick a favorite, but Brain eventually bubbled to the top. He's a little nerdy, but he's got a heart of gold." He thoughtfully turned his soda glass with his fingers. "Now I'll have to start all over again, with the girls."
----
to be continued