Castaways on a Sullen Sea
By weasleywheezes

Epilogue

Harry Potter lay in a coma for four months at St. Mungo's, and when he finally returned to waking life, the first faces he saw were those of Ron and Hermione. Neither one had scarcely left his side through the whole ordeal. They filled him in on what little they knew, like the fact that before Voldemort had kidnapped Snape, he had murdered an entire town of Muggles somewhere in Northern Ireland and ambushed a large group of Hogwarts students returning to school, killing many of them. Also killed in the Ireland attack was their fellow Order of the Phoenix ally and friend Tonks. No one seemed to know where Luna Lovegood and Colin Creevey were, and they were feared to have met their demise, also. It was too much for Harry to take all at once, but he tried. At least he knew that it was over, finally, completely over.

For Hermione, those four months were full of long conversations with Ron. Ron admitted that he was in love with her, that he always had been even when he was dating Emma. Hermione told him that she was flattered, but that she didn't share the same feelings.

"Can't you try to love me?" Ron asked pitifully.

"I do love you, Ronald, believe me when I say that I love you more than almost anyone else in this world. But I am not in love with you."

While Hermione sat vigil at Harry's bedside, Severus Snape returned to Hogwarts. He announced to his students that after this year, he would no longer teach potions. The students cheered, but were suddenly silent as he also announced that he would be their Defense of the Dark Arts teacher the following year. It seemed that since the professor no longer had to live the extremely dangerous life of a spy, he could claim the mantle of the position he had always desired. It should have made him happy. It should have lifted his mood, to know that his life's ambition had finally come true, but it meant nothing without Hermione Granger by his side.

He couldn't shake the feeling that he had wasted his life. All those years of sound and fury symbolizing nothing, as the Muggle literature said. That was his life. Finally, in the darkest of days, he had found some light, some hope. Hermione. He knew that she had changed him in more ways than he could possibly imagine. Severus had received an owl from her during those early months when Potter was teetering towards death. He had read it so many times that he had it memorized. There is so much happening, so much going on. I have to think for a while. I need to know what's right for me. What's the best thing for me to do… I'm so confused. I'm sorry. She swore to him, in that owl, that she loved him, that she would always love him, and that what they had was very special to her. She just needed to know if that was what she wanted. She was, after all, a young woman in the prime of her life. He couldn't imagine what she was going through. In less than twenty four hours, she had consummated her relationship with her much older lover, seen two murders, almost saw her best friend die and had her other best friend admit his love for her. It had to be mind boggling for her. He didn't envy her situation at all.

Days turned to weeks, and Severus slipped deeper and deeper into doldrums. Hermione would never return to him. Her devotion to Potter and Weasley would overcome any chance he would have had. Still, he would never have taken back the last two years. Two years… had it really been that long?

He looked at himself in the mirror more often, seeing the silver strands gleaming through his coal black hair. He was an experienced man, true, but his heart was light when he was with her. He loved her with a fire and zeal that he never felt for anyone or anything else. She was love to him, life to him. No, he would never regret these few moments of pure joy and passion with her. "Audaces fortuna iuvat, Severus, and you are neither lucky or brave," he thought to himself. He sighed, but he knew that what he and Hermione shared would always be more than a memory.

Late in the spring, as the students were leaving Hogwarts and he was preparing to return to his home, he paused for a moment at his office window. He glanced out, watching the students playing games, laughing, and standing near the edge of the lake. The lake…that's how it all started. Everything seemed tied to that body of water out there, calling to him, beckoning him to swim its murky depths. The sun was reflecting off it, glinting the ripples with silver. He spied a little paper boat floating on the surface, bobbing along with the movement of the giant squid swimming around. That diminutive boat seemed to be tossed along with no sure course. That little boat was his relationship with Hermione. They were castaways, he thought to himself. Castaways alone in a rough, stormy sea, never knowing which waves would crush them.

He finished packing away the few bottles of porcupine quills and started getting his desk in order, when the door creaked open. The silence was overwhelming, but the smell of talcum powder and… gardenias? He knew…he knew deep inside of him that it was Hermione; she had returned to him. He never turned around, but felt as her arms encircled him, as she tangled her fingers in his. For the first time in a long time, he felt truly happy, and for the first time in his life, he felt truly loved. He fought hard to control the flood of emotions welling up deep within him, but he knew that he could face that raging sea with Hermione. He had to.

"Welcome home, Miss Granger."

FIN