Disclaimer: I don't own DC or anything remotely related to it.

The Quandary

Chapter 1 - The Encounter

Reformatted 1.27.04

Ai Haibara sighed as she turned off her cell phone and put it in her backpack. She was sitting in the chair in front of the monitor in the professor's basement. An open box sat on the table. Inside, there was a single pill. Ai reached over and took the pill in her tiny hands. Turning it over and over in her palm, she began to think about the way things had turned out. Ever since that day, it was always, 'kill him' 'perfect the APTX-4869', 'kill him', and 'kill him'. That was all she had to do. Afterwards, her sister… both of them would be forgotten by the Organization. Just two simple tasks, yet… she couldn't. Why? Earlier, she'd been indifferent, nonchalant. So why was it now, now that she was so close to achieving a normal life with her sister, that her conscience began to nag her? Who cares about the people that will die in the future, killed by APTX-4869? Who cares about Kudo? But in spite of that, she couldn't do it. She might as well ask herself, 'Who cares about the Professor? Everyone that you sought help from when you first arrived? It doesn't matter if they die-- at your hands, does it?' She thought about it again. Why did she keep stalling? This situation… it was exactly the same as her sister's had been a couple of years ago. That's when she 'died'. What if they really do it this time? Why would they let two former members of the Organization run free? That, her doubt, was one of the reasons. But there was also another reason. That reason.

Aloud, she said to herself, "If Jiminy Cricket† were here…" she made a violent motion with her minuscule hands. Sighing, she weighed her choices again. A: 'Free' my sister and myself from the clutches of the Organization by condemning thousands of people to death with this, and save the Professor, the kids, Mouri… everyone but Kudo. Or, B: She could refuse to do it, and get killed, along with her sister, Kudo, the Professor, the kids, and the Organization would eventually find someone to replace her, to perfect the poison after she was 'taken care of'... in the eyes of a bystander, option B would seem to be the better one; save thousands of lives by sacrificing yourself and a few others, but… a bystander wouldn't understand. The bystander hadn't relied on one of the 'few others' during childhood; the bystander hadn't been taken in by one of the 'few others'… Plus, sacrificing herself was one thing, but deciding the fate of others… that was something she couldn't do. She... she had no right. She couldn't just decide that for another.

So what? she asked herself. Kudo does it. He does it every time he takes that temporary antidote. He risks not just his own life, but mine, the professor's, the Mouris'… and, he does it cheerfully, as if he's jeopardizing nothing. Why is it so hard? Just pick one. Why is it so hard? Angrily, she hurled the pill onto the cold basement floor.

Just as her foot made contact with the white pill to crush it, the door opened, casting a fine line of light upon the dark basement floor. A second later, a dark shadow appeared, partially blocking the light and leaving the outline of a short boy.

"Hey, what-" Conan began conversationally. He stopped short as he saw the scene before him, and took a few steps forward. "Wh... what is that?"

I've already decided not to go along with their plan... might as well tell him. But I don't think I should do that unless I have no other choice. I could always tell him that it's another failure. Haibara thought, eyeing the boy standing by doorway. "It's another one. I ran some tests, and..." Dammit, now my life is becoming lies, too. She thought as she broke off. Luckily, Conan assumed the silence was because Haibara was unwilling to admit that, in her fury, she had destroyed the failure.

"So you crushed it in your rage?" Conan sounded slightly amused. "I thought that we established that since it wouldn't benefit either of us, you'd... quit..."

"Yeah, but... I don't know... I just- I guess it's a habit..." Haibara looked at the crushed pill with feigned interest.

Conan was silent for a moment, then he began to speak. "You know, you don't have to lie to me. You've been acting kinda weird for the past week..."

"You must be imagining things," Haibara replied in an offhand tone. "It's not like you'd actually be able to tell if I did act differently..." she ended with a sarcastic smile.

"I'm not quite sure how to explain it, but I just know... Something's not right." he took a step forward with an almost accusing look in his eyes.

Haibara extended her arms in a shrug, accompanied by raised eyebrows. "And I thought that I was the paranoid." she muttered, just loudly enough for him to hear. Her mask wasn't slipping a bit, but inside, she was torn by indecision.

"At school... you're not...focused. Not the way a normal 9th grader is focused, but 'focused' in our terms. You've stopped mocking the hypocritical biology teacher, you've stopped correcting the ignorant chemistry teacher, you don't come with us when we skip English... When we walk home together, you don't talk. You just go to your room when we arrive here. You don't even make fun of the homework anymore, you just do it in the morning while you cram your breakfast in your mouth. If I were anyone else, I'd say that you've finally 'straightened up', aside from the procrastination, but... I know better. Something happened last week." Conan said, with a surprising degree of certainty in his voice.

Haibara looked at him for a second before her mask crumbled. "Last weekend... the convention." her words were barely audible.

Conan nodded. The professor had gone to a science convention that lasted the whole weekend. He had gone to soccer scrimmage.

"They came..."

Wordlessly, Haibara walked down the stairs leading to the basement. Unwittingly, her thoughts drifted to her future, which was odd, because when she was in the Organization, she knew that after she created the perfect, untraceable poison, she would be assigned another project. But now, she was free from the Organization. Maybe she could live a normal child's life. Yeah, right. Eventually, they will find the tiny imperfection, and when that day comes... The little girl standing alone in the basement shuddered. The silky strands of strawberry-blond hair danced in the air as she shook her head as if, by that simple act, she could clear her head, erase the memories...

The normally-cheery chime of the doorbell had been transformed into a nerve-jangling, discordant shriek, jolting her out of her thoughts. Curiously, she quickly ascended the stairs and waited, listening. Nothing. Cautiously, she stepped up and headed towards the door. Strange, Agasa hadn't mentioned any visitors, or that he was expecting a package... When she reached the foyer, her blood froze in her veins. Gin was leaning casually against the wall, and Vodka was standing in the doorway. With a start, she dove into the kitchen, grasped the doorknob of the door leading to the yard, and-

"Stop." Gin commanded in an icy tone.

Haibara straightened up and glared at them, composing herself. "Do you really think that-" she began, although she knew that they'd had ample time to kill her, so they must have another reason for coming...

"Hey, what are you doing?" A voice she'd never forget burst out.

A shocked expression replaced the mask of indifference she'd slipped on to hide her fear. That voice... but... how? ... Quickly, the expression on her face reverted back to a look of carelessness and slight suspicion, with a touch of contempt for her own confusion. Wake up. Just because they've got your sister's voice on tape... It's just from earlier... before she died... she thought. "Clever. A recording." She tried to make her voice sound indifferent, sarcastic, even. But even to herself, the childish voice sounded strange. "You should've known that such a simple trick won't work," she continued.

Vodka flashed a wolf-like grin at her and stepped aside.

Haibara's mask shattered, her heart stopped, and her head spun. She reached out with a trembling had and her long fingers grasped the doorknob for support. Palpable confusion was present in her blue eyes that held in their depths an astounding extent of brilliance even for an adult, let alone a ninth grader. "Wha-" she croaked, her voice a mere whisper. "What?" It was impossible. Those eyes. The face. That voice. The person behind Vodka... it was... her sister.

A sly, evanescent smile flitted across Gin's face. Yes, everything was going exactly as planned.

"Well, where is she?" Akemi Miyano demanded. "You-"

Vodka smirked and motioned towards Haibara with a sweep of his huge hand, cutting her off in mid-sentence.

"What?! This little girl?" Akemi turned to face Gin. Shock, disbelief, and a slight hint of anger were evident both on her face and in her words. But the depths of her eyes reflected realization and sadness. But of the three others in the room, only Haibara could penetrate the layers of feigned shock and anger to see that.

Vodka rolled his eyes, a subtle action that went unnoticed due to his sunglasses by all except Gin. First, they had to convince one, the genius that her sister was still alive, although she was standing in plain sight. Then, they had to convince the other that her eighteen-year-old sister was actually this fourteen year-old girl poised by the door like a frightened deer ready to bolt.

"Due to the situation you're in, I'd say that our requests should seem quite reasonable," Gin addressed the shocked girl. "Observe Kudo, and using the data, recreate APTX-4869. You will be given further instructions. Take this." Gin tossed a black cell phone to her.

As she made no move to catch the phone, the black phone plummeted towards the kitchen floor and certain destruction. At the last second, Haibara bent down and snatched the phone. "So... what do we get out of this...exchange?"

"Well... the Organization might... forget about some certain people... and we'll stop hunting them down..." Gin referred to them vaguely in third person to amuse himself while seemingly absently turning his gun over in his hand.

"Yeah, like it was 10‡ years ago." As she spoke, a puzzled glint appeared in Haibara's eyes, and her head involuntarily turned in the direction of her sister.

"Believe what you will." Gin shrugged, replying in an indifferent voice.

Her head was racing and questions flew through Haibara's mind. How is it that she's still alive? "Who are you?" she asked her sister. "Who are you?" purely for the benefits of Gin and Vodka.

Vodka, being the stupid one, offered to let them speak privately.

Gin shot Vodka such a malevolent glance that Vodka cringed. "Very well." Gin motioned towards the kitchen, then turned to Vodka. "Can't you tell that's what they wanted?" he demanded.

"Yeah, but..." Vodka looked around, then lowered his voice. "she's bugged. I did it when she was getting out of the car." Vodka finished proudly.

"You what? Do you realize that you just-" Gin clenched his fists in anger. "That bug... it'll override the-" Gin stopped as he realized he was speaking loudly enough for others to hear. He began to speak softly, but clearly. "I already had one. It sends a signal to HQ. After they decode and unscramble it, they can overhear the conversation directly, as it happens. You stupid-" Gin stopped himself from unleashing a torrent of verbal abuse at his incompetent partner.

Akemi walked towards her sister, smiling to herself. She had destroyed the bug, and Gin's transmitter, too. She stopped paces from her sister knelt so they would be eye level, and took in what she saw. The guarded expression, unique red/blond hair color, blue eyes...

"What happened?" They both asked at the same time.

"I... I'm not quite sure..." Ai admitted. "I... well, do you remember the... bank heist?"

Akemi nodded. "Did it start there? I thought it was kinda weird how I was pulled out during the lunch break..."

Ai's eyes narrowed. "Lunch break?" she repeated sharply.

"Yeah. They said that I just had to act like it was a normal day, then leave for lunch and not come back." Akemi clarified.

"So who...? A low-ranking member they needed to pin the blame on?" Ai wondered.

"Who what?" Akemi asked. "Who was the robber? Who died?"

"Yeah. They made it look like a suicide, and your alias was all over the papers. That's why I thought you... Anyway, I halted all progress on APTX-4869 until they provided a reason. They never did. I refused to continue the research and development. They sent me to the gas chamber, but Gin was called away... a messenger came to speak to him, and all I heard was 'urgent', 'found', and a name I couldn't make out. I was handcuffed to a column to await my death, and Gin left with the messenger. Luckily, I still had a single pill left, and I decided to end it all-- on my terms. But instead of killing me..." Haibara stopped and looked down at her hands, palms up and parallel to the ground.

"Well, my story is a lot simpler," Akemi began, breaking the silence. "Basically, from the lunch break, I was picked up and taken to one of the smaller bases. "I've worked there ever since. When I asked, they said that you'd been allowed to leave, as we'd agreed." Akemi finished.

"So the deal that you made with them..." Haibara trailed off.

"I'd accomplish that simple feat, and you'd leave," seeing the questioning look on her sister's face, Akemi quickly added, "I'd stay semi-involved, like before."

For a few seconds, they both fell silent, each thinking her own thoughts.

"So... d'you know why I was chosen to develop the drug and work for them, but you were-- just kinda like a part-time member?" Ai finally asked.

"You were just a little kid," Akemi replied after a few seconds' pause. "I had learned to hide my intelligence behind a mask of stupidity, much like the way the way you hide your emotions. However, you were freely displaying yours, pointing out flaws in new products, giving advice on theoretical stages of development of everything from guns to... pills. I, on the other hand, acted so stupidly they couldn't believe it. Oh... my gosh..." she imitated, "this kid is practically retarded. At first, I thought that she just had bad eyesight; there's no way anyone could be that stupid."

Ai chuckled, surprising herself. It was a real laugh, free of sarcasm and a mocking edge. "It was that bad?"

Akemi shrugged. "Well, the Organization does have high expectations and standards. They fell for it, and it bought partial freedom... plus, both high school and college were so easy... I took the hardest courses offered, and yet I never attended class except occasionally to obtain information on future tests and on the actual test dates; I just hung out with some friends. "

"Yeah, the Organization has really high standards, and when I went to college in America, it was like that too. Just that I actually went to class, being the introverted type of person that I am... well, I went to class when I felt like it." Ai amended. She smiled. A genuine smile, not sardonic or derisive.

The loud clunking of boots traveling across the tiled kitchen floor sounded, added by Vodka's declaration that time was up and demand that they get moving.

A blank look shifted onto both of their faces as the sisters rose.

"F-" Ai began hotly, but as she remembered that her sister's fate remained in the Organization's clutches, she stumbled. "F...arewell..." she ended lamely, with a vague nod towards her sister.

Reluctantly, Akemi slowly-but gracefully-moved toward the door. Haibara watched her go, equally reluctant, but with a blank look on her face. She managed to hold on to the mask, struggled to keep her mind clear, strained to stand until the door closed. Then, before the sound of the receding footsteps had vanished, she collapsed into a heap on the kitchen floor, her head swirling with jumbled thoughts.

† Jiminy Cricket is the conscience in Pinocchio.

‡ In Volume 20, File 1 of the Chinese version, Haibara says that she's "18, like you." I assumed that two years had passed since Volume 1, when Shinichi was 16 (again, according the the Chinese version). I know there may be discrepancies due to the translations, but...

Thanks to the one person who reviewed the prologue.

Ryyan- grins Well, does it look like it's building up to Conan X Ai? I don't know... I didn't plan on it being that way, just a normal action/adventure story, but then again, I didn't plan much at all...

reize-feitan - Thanks! (May take awhile, but I have no plans of ditching this one)