Disclaimer: Tolkien owns the characters. I am taking liberties with them.
Rating: PG-13.
Author's Note: Those of you who feel uncomfortable due to the intimacy between males in this story (or any of my stories), please read Someone Reading's review of the previous chapter. She captured the essence of what I wanted to portray perfectly, and since I lack the ability to explain myself in a coherent and comprehensible manner (I may write fiction but I suck at talking), I enthusiastically suggest that you read her eloquent description of what she understands. (Um, sorry Someone Reading, I hope I am not freaking you out here)
And I apologize for the delay of the previous update. It was all Erestor and Glorfindel's fault. ;) I think I have those two pretty much straightened out here, and hope to complete this tale before I take off to Korea for two weeks on August 2. Let's just pray that Erestor and Glorfindel don't give me further trouble. ;)
Thank you to aronoiiel for reviewing chapters 8 and 9! I was wondering where you were! ;) I hope your computer comes back to life...heh heh. Anyway, your beautiful praises never fail to encourage me! And not only that, but you give me such beautiful reviews for each chapter even if they are old updates. ;) I was so excited to hear what you think of my characterizations. Thank you so much!
Thank you also to Erestor for reviewing chapters 3 - 9! My, to think you actually reviewed all of the chapters you missed while you were gone! I was so frustrated during your absence, you see – I am so glad that you are back! Not only are you a fantastic writer and reviewer, but you are an excellent advisor too! Ooh, look, your name is Erestor...hehehe. Er, sorry. Anyway, did you know that I used the info you gave me as a foundation for a multi-chapter story featuring Erestor and Glorfindel? And it is so kind of you to review chapters that were posted way back when – I was very touched. I agree that fanfiction is getting repetitive, and try hard to stay away from following the flow, and your review really brightened my day. You're right in saying that the most traumatizing thing for a child is to see parents in pain; it is indeed a trauma. I usually don't use many long paragraphs, but I broke my habitual style in this story with my use of short and simple words; I am glad that you like them. ;) And you must be joking – you, intimidated by the likes of me? Oh please. I have many times basked in the magnificence of your stories for inspiring moments whenever I had a frustrating day. You are a wonderful writer, and a very kind one at that, to give me such praises. Thank you so much for your words. And your grasp on my symbolisms pleased me, and your famous humor...I found that your humor sneaked into your review. Hehehe. I loved it!
Thank you to Aerlalaith for reviewing chapters 1, 4 and 9! It's nice to have you stop by the past updates to tell me how you feel about the fic!
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By Kasmi Kassim
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Tears of Yesterday
Chapter 10: Roar of Rain
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The rain was pouring heavily from the darkening gray sky by the time Elrohir began to struggle up the hill. Gritting his teeth, he readjusted his balance, leaning forward and digging his feet into the mud of the slope. The white streaks of incessant rain were nearly blinding.
His feet slipped against the ground, and he crouched low, tensing his body. Fortunately, he did not slide far down. He began to trudge upward again, heavy feet searching and slipping. His body was still weary from his earlier outburst. For how many hours had he wept?
He had one hope – and fear – that Elladan had to be tired as well, as he had held down the twin with all his might as Elrohir struggled against him. And Elladan had held him as he wept, and had brought him to their room when he fell from exhaustion. He could not be far.
Where was Elladan?
Following his tracks was not difficult. It seemed that his brother had gone blundering into the wilderness without concern for safety; the trail led to a former orc encampment, and daylight – as little of it there was – would fade soon. And Elrohir had neglected to arm himself before running out, panic driving his feet away from the inventory that was full with his brother's weapons except for a sword. Not even a single arrow or dagger had been taken by his twin.
Trying to shake off the sinking feeling of dread that was forming in his stomach, Elrohir quickened his strained pace. The slope was becoming muddier, sliding under his feet in miniature avalanches. One tumble could result in a serious injury, if not death. But this was where Elladan's trail led. And from what Elrohir could tell, his brother, so far, had not fallen.
"Elladan!" he called, his young voice merging with the sounds of heavy downpour. "Elladan!"
The call resonated in a feeble echo in the valley, before being beaten down mercilessly by the rain.
Frustrated, Elrohir pushed strands of hair out of his face and continued to climb the treacherous hill. His legs were not long enough, nor strong enough, to withstand much more exertion without compromising safety. He silently prayed that summit would come soon.
And it did. Soon he was standing on the top of the hill, looking around at the flat clearing that lay bare under the rain's assaults. And his eyes spotted his brother immediately, a weary speck of gray light among the dark scraps and chunks of bodies strewn around the dirtied grass. He froze in his steps.
The flat clearing was littered with black carcasses. Fresh splashes of black painted the grass, diluted with rainwater and pooling about the bloody site of slaughter. And in the middle of the clearing, a small dark-haired elf sat with his knees tucked neatly under him, his hair disheveled and clinging to his waist. His eyes were hollow as they stared into the distance. His bent arms hung limply in the front, supported by the hands that clutched the sword that protruded sharply from a black carcass before him. The carcass was much larger than the elf who sat before it. Both elf and orc were motionless.
Elrohir screamed.
"Elladan!"
Startled, Elladan turned his head. His eyes widened at the sight of his twin, barely standing, a terrified expression in his eyes. He looked down upon the carcass that lay on front of him. And the sword that connected to it, cold underneath his hands. The rain had washed the blood clean from the blade.
He blinked. Taking a deep breath, he slowly released the sword. Stiffened joints creaked as fingers loosened their grip. His body slumped as he detached himself, staring blankly down at the dark corpse. When had he done this?
Confused, he reached out tentatively, and touched the motionless body before his eyes. It was cold and leathery under his frozen fingers. Elladan leaned further forward, searching for the face of this mystery. Then he froze.
Bloodshot eyes stared back at him. Contorted and stilled into the face of Death, the expression of hate and horror protruded from the bulging orbs, accusing him, devouring him.
In a lightning fast movement, Elladan drew his sword out from the body and lifted it into the air.
Elrohir's body stiffened, and a muted cry gurgled within his throat. His brother's eyes gleamed wildly with feral instinct as he growled and lunged at the carcass.
Elladan drove the sword down, plunging it deep within the dead orc. He then pulled out the blade and plunged it into the body again. And again, and again – and black blood splattered against him, covering him in the dark bile. And killing the remains of the foe, he cried, cried out to the rain, screamed into the roar of the rain that deafened the world. And lost in an abyss of coldness, he continued to slaughter the orc, again, and again, and again –
"Stop it! Stop it, Elladan!"
A ragged cry tore into his ears, warm arms wrapped themselves tightly around his body.
Wildly, Elladan pushed the arms away. But they persisted. And the hold became fiercer, more desperate. And he could hear anguished sobs, screams, in the rain. Were they his own? He could not tell. Were they Elrohir's? Was Elrohir here?
"Stop it."
A tremulous whisper near his ear. A hot breath, so warm, so alive next to his cold skin.
Elladan clutched the sword tight. But his arms could not move. Irritated, he struggled again, determined to shake the interferer away. But Elrohir attached himself tighter, hugged his brother fiercely.
"Please."
The voice was breaking. Why was the voice so sad? Why did it tremble so?
"You are supposed to be my anchor. You have to let me be yours. You can't comfort me and then come out here to do this. You can't do this to me."
Tears. Was he crying? Elladan blinked. No, it was Elrohir. Elrohir was crying. What made him cry? Did he not comfort him well enough? He was supposed to be sleeping in that bed, where he had put him earlier. He had to be exhausted from crying so much earlier. Was it earlier today? Or was it yesterday? Or last week? He could not remember.
Bewildered, he looked around. And then, his eyes fell on the carcass again.
Orcs.
His eyes narrowed.
Kill.
Kill them all.
A hollow gleam replaced the look of recognition. Newly-stained hands curled around his sword again. Tightening his grip, he gritted his teeth.
The orcs were making his brother cry. They would never make him cry, never again. Valar be his witness, he would never let them hurt his brother again.
With a savage howl, he shook off the warm body wrapped around his own, and plunged forward toward the cruel eyes of the corpse.
Die. Die. Die.
"Stop!"
The cry ripped into the rain, shrill against the darkened heavens with jagged tears.
And once again he was restrained from behind, his sword being wrenched away. Growling, he fought back viciously. He had to have the sword. He had to protect Elrohir. He could not let them make him cry anymore.
"This isn't going to bring her back!"
The scream assaulted his ears in a deafening roar.
He sat still, stunned, as his eyes glazed out of focus. The sword left his stilled fingers, and a distant clang could be heard, somewhere far away. The warm arms quickly wrapped around him again. And the desperate whisper returned, hot and broken against his neck.
"This isn't going to bring her back, Elladan."
Suddenly, the world went still. And all he could hear was the heavy rain, desolate amidst the silence of the valley.
Raising his head, he slowly turned. Blinking, he searched dazedly for the owner of the voice, the owner of the palpable grief that twisted his heart with an acrid taste of bitter tears.
Elrohir's expression was pained, hurt, as his eyes trembled into his. Lowering his own dulled eyes, Elladan's arms fell limp.
He had hurt his brother.
As he sat lifelessly in the black pool of blood, Elrohir cried into his blood-soaked tunic, hugging his twin tighter, warming the cold chest with his tears. And Elladan sat still, eyes unfocused, as the rain continued to roar around them. Drowning out the heart-wrenching wail that rose with the roar and ripped under the white spears that poured from the heavens.
Staring out into a distance beyond his twin, beyond the small form that clung to his tunic with a bowed head and shaking shoulders, Elladan's hand tentatively reached out. His eyes were still hazed, unfocused, as the hands traveled up to his brother on their own accord, and the bloodied arms wrapped around the trembling figure, slowly pulling him into a comforting embrace, shielding him from the merciless rain.
And around the stilled warm bodies of the young brothers, rain continued to fall.
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To Be Continued
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Someone Reading: You know, I never really expected this story to be as well-liked as The Strength of One Green Leaf because it is more abstraction and less action – and it is such a pleasant surprise to see that some people enjoy this story so! And yes, you do deserve every praise that you get, not only as a reviewer but also as a reader and writer! I was stunned when you read into my rain scene; as I said in my bio, half of my symbolism and metaphors are not consciously inserted but written without thinking twice only because I envision it – and it is readers like you who point them out to me and help me realize what I was subconsciously aiming at! And your meticulous observations – or should I say wholehearted visualizations – on the short scenes of Elladan, Glorfindel, Elrohir, etc. all surprise me over and again! By the way, do you mind if I direct some reviewers to your review? Your example and wording was so eloquent and perfect for explaining my slash issue, and I was moved to tears to know that someone understood and shared my vision of a soul-touching friendship and love. I had just about given up hope of ever getting my true meanings across, and was afraid that I was not doing a good enough job at expressing what I envisioned. Thank you so much mellon nin!
ThePastIsPrologue: You like seeing my reviews? I do too. ;) They are beautiful, and make me giddy and touched. Just like yours do. ;) Anyway, I am profoundly honored that my stories make you think over some things. And I got the Hobbit from the library yesterday! I hope I finish it before I take off to Korea for two weeks – I will most certainly remember to email you once I finish it! I'm excited to hear that the offer still stands! Thanks a lot!
Sesha: Artistic license indeed. I am rather famous for that one. Hehehe. Anyway, I am glad that you see different personalities here. One tries her best ;) So who do you think is the worst off now? I am curious! ::chuckles:: Thank you for your review!
Coolio02: Oh yes, our little Erestor can hold his own against the balrog slayer. ;) And when will he be able to release his pain? Or will he? Sigh. Oh, sorry, I am not helping you am I? ;) Anyway, at least I answered one of your questions with this chapter! ::grins:: Thank you for reviewing!
Ertia: Thank you! It is reliving and exciting to hear that you like my Erestor and Glorfindel! Those two are a pain to portray. ;) I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well!
Unsung Heroine: Oh, I am glad that your exams went well! If only we can all do well in exams...::droopy eyes:: Anyway. I am honored that you look so forward to my stories! This will definitely help my writing!
xAKGIRLx: Yes, I understand. I know lots of kids around me who feel the same thing. Many of them are Korean and they have their parents out on missionary trips in foreign lands. Sigh. Well, I do hope that you reunite with your parents soon. And thanks for reviewing ;)
seeing-spots: Yay! Someone agrees with me! I'm glad you think so! ::hugs:: Thank you for telling me so!
Brazgirl: Mwahahahaha, again the famous Brazgirl goes off with the beautiful and happifying visualizations of beautiful elven males. Tee hee hee. What story and character trait made you fall so much for Thranduil, I wonder? Well anyway, thanks for reviewing!
Beling: I am honored beyond words that you are letting me lead you to peer into the dark world of taboo ideas. I would like to know what I am doing that makes you feel comfortable enough to move in that direction, so that I would hopefully help more readers feel comfortable in the future and refrain from offending someone unintentionally...;) I am so surprised that you were tense with my Erestor-Glorfindel relationship and still found it beautiful – what I wouldn't give to have some of your generosity and objectivity. ;) And once again you impress me with your understanding of my short scenes, with the two adult elves as well as the two twin elves. And let me not forget how beautifully you take in my imagery of colors and such. The sun will shine in their lives again, and it will shine beautifully. ;) Thank you!
Achika: You were right, Elladan did go off to where you thought he would. You catch hints and implications very fast! And you were the first to bring up the black crystal that Erestor wears around his neck...;) I am pleased that you recognized it as a symbol of some sort. The origin of that black crystal will perhaps be revealed later. Thank you for reviewing!
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