Title: This Tear
Author: SydGillyKC
Author's Note: Woohoo, keep those reviews coming! Thanks guys! And OMG "Double Agent" was so unbelievably amazing. Definitely loved that episode, and the one tonight looks awesome too. Also, I'm sorry it took me so long to update. It doesn't normally take me this long but I had a really brutal week at school and then I had literally 6 of my friends here this weekend (three from out of state) so I couldn't even get to my computer. I promise to try to have the next part out a lot faster. I had a really interesting idea for this story the other day, so now I'm really excited about getting to the part where I'm going to write about it, so that plus reviews (hint hint) should keep me motivated to update quickly (.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
"Hello?" Came a male voice that he recognized as Will's.
"Will? It's Vaughn. Can I talk to Sydney?"
"She's not here." Something about Will's voice instantly put Vaughn in panic-mode.
"What's going on, Will? Where's Sydney?" He asked, his voice frantic.
"She collapsed this afternoon. She's in the hospital."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 5: Three or Four Days
Vaughn swore that, in that moment, his heart nearly stopped beating. He took a deep breath and tried to find his voice again so he could find out what the *hell* was going on.
"What happened?" He said, his voice still anything but calm
"When I brought her home from her treatment today, she said she felt dizzy. When she went to her room, she just collapsed. I called an ambulance and they took her to the hospital. The doctors said something about the tumor putting pressure on her brain, but they haven't run any tests yet," Will explained, obviously distraught also.
"Why not?"
"Angel of Mercy's ER was closed for a while this afternoon because they were overloaded with people from a major car accident. They had to take her to another hospital. The doctors said that, since she was stable, they would wait and let her regular doctors run tests when she's transferred to Angel of Mercy tomorrow."
"Wait a minute. She's *not* at Angel of Mercy?" Vaughn said, suddenly feeling as if something in this nightmare had gone right.
"No, she's at St. Vincent's," Will told him.
"What room is she in?" Vaughn asked, already laying out a plan in his mind.
"She's on the oncology floor. Room 921."
"Thanks, Will," Vaughn said, quickly hanging up the phone. He knew he had no time to waste. He rubbed a hand over his face and tried to pull himself slightly back together before turning his phone back on and dialing.
"Jack, it's Vaughn. I need your help."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Vaughn stood in the hallway, his hand hovering over the handle of the door. He took a deep breath before forcing himself to open the door. He did so as quietly as possible and entered the room, shutting the door behind him. The room was dark, but he could see easily due to the illumination of the glowing heart monitor and the moonlight, which streamed in through the window. He instantly saw her on the bed, which was elevated almost to a sitting position, but slightly more reclined. She was facing away from him, but surprised him by turning her head and looking at him, obviously wide awake. A look of shock spread over her face as she lifted herself off the pillows a bit. Her eyes followed him as he walked over and dropped into the chair next to her bed.
"Vaughn, you shouldn't be here. You could be killed if anyone saw you-" she said frantically before Vaughn shook his head, cutting her off.
"Syd, it's okay. Your dad set this up. We've got agents controlling all security devices. We're fine," he said quietly. She didn't look convinced, but he noticed her relax a bit and lean back against the pillows on her bed. She sighed and looked away from him, her eyes glued to her hands, which rested in her lap. An awkward silence settled over them, neither sure of what to say. The situations were now reversed from that time she'd seen him in the hospital, sick from what he'd been exposed to in Taipei. This was a whole new territory for them now. He'd never seen her in anything less than perfect health. He'd never even seen her seriously injured. He had prayed that he'd never have to. Just another prayer that had not been answered.
Vaughn looked up at her then. She was still beautiful, he doubted that could ever change, but she did look sick. Her face was pale and there were dark circles under her eyes. And in looking at her eyes, he noticed that the life they usually held was somehow absent, replaced by a dull look. A sad look. He couldn't help himself. He reached his hand out and laid it over hers. She looked at down at his hand and then turned her own hand in his and laced their fingers together. She then looked back up at him and held his gaze, neither speaking for what seemed like hours. Finally, the silence became too much.
"How are you?" He asked gently, not sure if she was angry that he'd come. He was relieved when she gave him a small smile.
"I'm okay. I mean, they drugged me up pretty good, but." she trailed off. He nodded.
"What happened?" He asked, referring to earlier that day.
"Honestly. I don't really remember much. When I got home, I felt pretty sick, but I knew that was normal. When the room started spinning, I decided to go lie down. I barely made it to my room when everything just went black. I woke up here," she told him, shrugging. "I'm being transferred tomorrow. They'll run tests then."
"Do they have *any* idea what caused this? I mean, just based on your symptoms?" He asked, not really sure he wanted to hear the answer.
"A few," she said, nodding. He realized she probably hated giving the answers as much as he hated hearing them. but he simply had to know.
"Such as?" He pressed. She looked at him for a moment without saying anything, as if deciding whether he was worthy of knowing the information. He was surprised when he could actually see in her eyes when her decision was made. He knew she'd tell him.
"The two most probable guesses they have are that the tumor shifted its position to where it's putting a slight pressure on part of my brain or. that it's growing more rapidly than they anticipated," she told him, her voice barely above a whisper. Though the words felt as harsh as physical blows, he had been prepared to hear them. Since he had spoken to Will, he spent every second fearing the worst for her condition. He thought maybe he could prepare himself. It was only when he heard the words straight from her lips that he realized nothing could prepare him for a moment like this.
"Vaughn." She said, forcing his attention back to her and away from his dark thoughts. "Don't take this the wrong way, but why did you come?"
"I can't just want to see you?" Vaughn asked jokingly, needing to lighten the mood a little bit before he delivered the next blow of the evening.
"Not if it means pulling agents from various other jobs and risking your own life," she responded, a ghost of a smile crossing her face. Their conversation was so typical of them, it was almost like she wasn't sick. Had she not been laying in a hospital bed, connected to a heart monitor and an IV, it would've been easy to pretend she wasn't.
"Okay, you win. I came here to prepare you for something that we might have to do," he said, wanting to tell her as little as possible until he knew more about the situation.
"And that something would be."
"Well, Dr. Madison noticed some irregularities in your blood work. That's why he needed to run additional tests. He's not sure exactly what it means yet, but it's possible that there's something in your system that shouldn't be. We should know very soon. Until then, we're going to keep a close eye on every move your doctors make. If we find out they've done anything unusual, we have a plan to get you out of here. To take you somewhere where they'll never find you," he explained.
"Into hiding," she said, clearly hating the very thought.
"Syd, listen," Vaughn said firmly. "In all likelihood Dr. Madison won't turn up anything. There's a very strong chance that you'll complete your treatment at Angel of Mercy without incident. I just needed to warn you in case something does go wrong. Don't take any sedatives they may give you and try to cut down the pain medication you may need as much as possible. We just need you to be alert at all times. As soon as I know anything, you'll know. I won't keep you in the dark, Syd, I promise."
She looked at him, her eyes sparkling with the faintest hint of unshed tears. She squeezed his hand and nodded. "Thank you," she whispered.
"You're welcome."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
It was two days later that Sydney finally got some answers. After being tested endlessly for the last day and a half, all she wanted to do was go home and forget any of this had ever happened. She wanted to forget that it was *still* happening. But when the doctor finally stepped in her room to give her the results, she knew it would probably be a long time before that would happen.
"That's a pretty grim face, doctor," Sydney said, noting the extremely serious expression the doctor held.
"I'm afraid the news isn't good, Sydney," he replied, instantly causing her to wince. She hated that he called her Sydney. It was a constant reminder of how much the doctor must know about her. As an employee of SD-6, the doctor most-likely had access to every file on her she could ever imagine. "Well, all of them except for the ones that CIA had," she thought.
"The tumor does appear to be growing rapidly despite the treatments you've received so far. The chemotherapy doesn't seem to be having the desired effect. The fact is that if it keeps growing at the rate it is now, it could kill you in a matter of weeks. The good news is that there's a specialist flying in, a brain surgeon whose reviewed your case. He strongly believes that he can operate and remove the tumor without leaving any permanent damage to your brain. I've spoken with a number of other oncologists and neurosurgeons in the hospital. We all believe this is your best shot."
The first and only thing that filled Sydney's mind was: Will this ever end? Will I be able to fight this?
Or will I die trying?
"If I agreed, when would the operation take place?" She asked, her mind reeling. She needed to tell Vaughn and her father. They needed to consult Dr. Hazen. She needed to tell Francie and Will. She needed to prepare herself for the possibility that she may not even make it out of surgery alive. There was so much that needed to be done, whether she made it out of surgery or not.
"If you agree to the surgery, which I'd strongly advise, it would need to be done as soon as possible. It's only a matter of time before the tumor grows too large for anything to be done. Depending on the surgeon's schedule, I'd like to schedule the surgery within the next three or four days," the doctor stated very seriously.
Three or four days. In the span of three or four days, Sydney Bristow would have to try to tie up every single loose end in her life.
It couldn't be done.
No, it *had* to be done.
To be continued.
A/N: Sorry, this chapter is a little shorter than I usually write them, but Alias is on in forty minutes and I still have to finish up some homework, so I figured that would be a good place to leave it. I essentially have the next part pretty planned out so it shouldn't take me too long to get posted (I hope). But as always, reviews make me work a lot faster lol! I hope everyone enjoys the episode tonight!
Author: SydGillyKC
Author's Note: Woohoo, keep those reviews coming! Thanks guys! And OMG "Double Agent" was so unbelievably amazing. Definitely loved that episode, and the one tonight looks awesome too. Also, I'm sorry it took me so long to update. It doesn't normally take me this long but I had a really brutal week at school and then I had literally 6 of my friends here this weekend (three from out of state) so I couldn't even get to my computer. I promise to try to have the next part out a lot faster. I had a really interesting idea for this story the other day, so now I'm really excited about getting to the part where I'm going to write about it, so that plus reviews (hint hint) should keep me motivated to update quickly (.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
"Hello?" Came a male voice that he recognized as Will's.
"Will? It's Vaughn. Can I talk to Sydney?"
"She's not here." Something about Will's voice instantly put Vaughn in panic-mode.
"What's going on, Will? Where's Sydney?" He asked, his voice frantic.
"She collapsed this afternoon. She's in the hospital."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Chapter 5: Three or Four Days
Vaughn swore that, in that moment, his heart nearly stopped beating. He took a deep breath and tried to find his voice again so he could find out what the *hell* was going on.
"What happened?" He said, his voice still anything but calm
"When I brought her home from her treatment today, she said she felt dizzy. When she went to her room, she just collapsed. I called an ambulance and they took her to the hospital. The doctors said something about the tumor putting pressure on her brain, but they haven't run any tests yet," Will explained, obviously distraught also.
"Why not?"
"Angel of Mercy's ER was closed for a while this afternoon because they were overloaded with people from a major car accident. They had to take her to another hospital. The doctors said that, since she was stable, they would wait and let her regular doctors run tests when she's transferred to Angel of Mercy tomorrow."
"Wait a minute. She's *not* at Angel of Mercy?" Vaughn said, suddenly feeling as if something in this nightmare had gone right.
"No, she's at St. Vincent's," Will told him.
"What room is she in?" Vaughn asked, already laying out a plan in his mind.
"She's on the oncology floor. Room 921."
"Thanks, Will," Vaughn said, quickly hanging up the phone. He knew he had no time to waste. He rubbed a hand over his face and tried to pull himself slightly back together before turning his phone back on and dialing.
"Jack, it's Vaughn. I need your help."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Vaughn stood in the hallway, his hand hovering over the handle of the door. He took a deep breath before forcing himself to open the door. He did so as quietly as possible and entered the room, shutting the door behind him. The room was dark, but he could see easily due to the illumination of the glowing heart monitor and the moonlight, which streamed in through the window. He instantly saw her on the bed, which was elevated almost to a sitting position, but slightly more reclined. She was facing away from him, but surprised him by turning her head and looking at him, obviously wide awake. A look of shock spread over her face as she lifted herself off the pillows a bit. Her eyes followed him as he walked over and dropped into the chair next to her bed.
"Vaughn, you shouldn't be here. You could be killed if anyone saw you-" she said frantically before Vaughn shook his head, cutting her off.
"Syd, it's okay. Your dad set this up. We've got agents controlling all security devices. We're fine," he said quietly. She didn't look convinced, but he noticed her relax a bit and lean back against the pillows on her bed. She sighed and looked away from him, her eyes glued to her hands, which rested in her lap. An awkward silence settled over them, neither sure of what to say. The situations were now reversed from that time she'd seen him in the hospital, sick from what he'd been exposed to in Taipei. This was a whole new territory for them now. He'd never seen her in anything less than perfect health. He'd never even seen her seriously injured. He had prayed that he'd never have to. Just another prayer that had not been answered.
Vaughn looked up at her then. She was still beautiful, he doubted that could ever change, but she did look sick. Her face was pale and there were dark circles under her eyes. And in looking at her eyes, he noticed that the life they usually held was somehow absent, replaced by a dull look. A sad look. He couldn't help himself. He reached his hand out and laid it over hers. She looked at down at his hand and then turned her own hand in his and laced their fingers together. She then looked back up at him and held his gaze, neither speaking for what seemed like hours. Finally, the silence became too much.
"How are you?" He asked gently, not sure if she was angry that he'd come. He was relieved when she gave him a small smile.
"I'm okay. I mean, they drugged me up pretty good, but." she trailed off. He nodded.
"What happened?" He asked, referring to earlier that day.
"Honestly. I don't really remember much. When I got home, I felt pretty sick, but I knew that was normal. When the room started spinning, I decided to go lie down. I barely made it to my room when everything just went black. I woke up here," she told him, shrugging. "I'm being transferred tomorrow. They'll run tests then."
"Do they have *any* idea what caused this? I mean, just based on your symptoms?" He asked, not really sure he wanted to hear the answer.
"A few," she said, nodding. He realized she probably hated giving the answers as much as he hated hearing them. but he simply had to know.
"Such as?" He pressed. She looked at him for a moment without saying anything, as if deciding whether he was worthy of knowing the information. He was surprised when he could actually see in her eyes when her decision was made. He knew she'd tell him.
"The two most probable guesses they have are that the tumor shifted its position to where it's putting a slight pressure on part of my brain or. that it's growing more rapidly than they anticipated," she told him, her voice barely above a whisper. Though the words felt as harsh as physical blows, he had been prepared to hear them. Since he had spoken to Will, he spent every second fearing the worst for her condition. He thought maybe he could prepare himself. It was only when he heard the words straight from her lips that he realized nothing could prepare him for a moment like this.
"Vaughn." She said, forcing his attention back to her and away from his dark thoughts. "Don't take this the wrong way, but why did you come?"
"I can't just want to see you?" Vaughn asked jokingly, needing to lighten the mood a little bit before he delivered the next blow of the evening.
"Not if it means pulling agents from various other jobs and risking your own life," she responded, a ghost of a smile crossing her face. Their conversation was so typical of them, it was almost like she wasn't sick. Had she not been laying in a hospital bed, connected to a heart monitor and an IV, it would've been easy to pretend she wasn't.
"Okay, you win. I came here to prepare you for something that we might have to do," he said, wanting to tell her as little as possible until he knew more about the situation.
"And that something would be."
"Well, Dr. Madison noticed some irregularities in your blood work. That's why he needed to run additional tests. He's not sure exactly what it means yet, but it's possible that there's something in your system that shouldn't be. We should know very soon. Until then, we're going to keep a close eye on every move your doctors make. If we find out they've done anything unusual, we have a plan to get you out of here. To take you somewhere where they'll never find you," he explained.
"Into hiding," she said, clearly hating the very thought.
"Syd, listen," Vaughn said firmly. "In all likelihood Dr. Madison won't turn up anything. There's a very strong chance that you'll complete your treatment at Angel of Mercy without incident. I just needed to warn you in case something does go wrong. Don't take any sedatives they may give you and try to cut down the pain medication you may need as much as possible. We just need you to be alert at all times. As soon as I know anything, you'll know. I won't keep you in the dark, Syd, I promise."
She looked at him, her eyes sparkling with the faintest hint of unshed tears. She squeezed his hand and nodded. "Thank you," she whispered.
"You're welcome."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
It was two days later that Sydney finally got some answers. After being tested endlessly for the last day and a half, all she wanted to do was go home and forget any of this had ever happened. She wanted to forget that it was *still* happening. But when the doctor finally stepped in her room to give her the results, she knew it would probably be a long time before that would happen.
"That's a pretty grim face, doctor," Sydney said, noting the extremely serious expression the doctor held.
"I'm afraid the news isn't good, Sydney," he replied, instantly causing her to wince. She hated that he called her Sydney. It was a constant reminder of how much the doctor must know about her. As an employee of SD-6, the doctor most-likely had access to every file on her she could ever imagine. "Well, all of them except for the ones that CIA had," she thought.
"The tumor does appear to be growing rapidly despite the treatments you've received so far. The chemotherapy doesn't seem to be having the desired effect. The fact is that if it keeps growing at the rate it is now, it could kill you in a matter of weeks. The good news is that there's a specialist flying in, a brain surgeon whose reviewed your case. He strongly believes that he can operate and remove the tumor without leaving any permanent damage to your brain. I've spoken with a number of other oncologists and neurosurgeons in the hospital. We all believe this is your best shot."
The first and only thing that filled Sydney's mind was: Will this ever end? Will I be able to fight this?
Or will I die trying?
"If I agreed, when would the operation take place?" She asked, her mind reeling. She needed to tell Vaughn and her father. They needed to consult Dr. Hazen. She needed to tell Francie and Will. She needed to prepare herself for the possibility that she may not even make it out of surgery alive. There was so much that needed to be done, whether she made it out of surgery or not.
"If you agree to the surgery, which I'd strongly advise, it would need to be done as soon as possible. It's only a matter of time before the tumor grows too large for anything to be done. Depending on the surgeon's schedule, I'd like to schedule the surgery within the next three or four days," the doctor stated very seriously.
Three or four days. In the span of three or four days, Sydney Bristow would have to try to tie up every single loose end in her life.
It couldn't be done.
No, it *had* to be done.
To be continued.
A/N: Sorry, this chapter is a little shorter than I usually write them, but Alias is on in forty minutes and I still have to finish up some homework, so I figured that would be a good place to leave it. I essentially have the next part pretty planned out so it shouldn't take me too long to get posted (I hope). But as always, reviews make me work a lot faster lol! I hope everyone enjoys the episode tonight!