Chapter 3:
Another bad night had passed by and Miennya had woken with a frightful headache that made her head spin. She tried to relax with meditation but gave up as she could feel herself tense and unfocused. It had just been a long month since she had spoken with the Council. The dreams had gotten worse every night. The Dark side was tempting her again, calling her to come back so badly that her nerves were frayed. She had snapped at her padawan badly yesterday for missing a shot and the girl had cried afterwards. This made her feel very bad and added to the pain in her head. It felt like it was going to burst at times, a sign she was dealing with the stress very badly.
Miennya dressed and then walked slowly past the meditation rooms as she twirled her fingers around the pressure points. Looking in, she smiled as she saw Ben meditating. Opening it silently, she sat and watched. She liked watching the way others meditated, gave her soothing thoughts and they always looked so peaceful compared to her continued fight with the Dark Side. Meditation had been a real problem since she had come back; the memories of her life always crowded around her and distracted her to no end. Looking up, she noticed Ben staring at her as he hovered. Looking at him sitting there peacefully opened something and she launched herself into his arms and cried against his shoulder as Ben overbalanced and hit the floor hard.
Rubbing the sore spot, Ben lifted her chin up and forced her to look at him in the eyes. She looked so sad against his shoulder, her eyes betraying her inner turmoil so he asked her a question. "What is it, my friend?"
Shaking her hair, she smiled as best she could which wasn't a very good effort. "I feel so unsettled Ben, so stretched and worn. The dreams have been haunting me again, the rivers have been getting longer and more bodies have been showing up in the visions. I am worried, my friend."
Stroking her hand, he smiled reassuringly. "You have great sadness in you, my dear. We can all feel it and we are here for you always. We love you, every single one of us and we don't want to lose you again. Tell me and we will work something out."
Miennya nodded. "I feel the Dark Side in me, haunting me again. I have not had rest since I came back and it has worn me to breaking point. You must advise me, my friend. What must I do to find closure? I would be rid of my past memories but they keep coming and I am afraid that the mistake I made long ago will haunt me and spell the end of our Order. I feel a great swell of danger around me and this will lead to death and chaos. The Force is warning me of the approaching deaths of us all at the hands of the Sith. I caused this and I must fix it, though I know not how..."
Ben was worried; she was blaming herself for her suffering. He could feel the conflict in her heart, it showed in her now scarlet orbs. "You are not to blame, Miennya. You did nothing wrong and this day was long in the making for a battle between the light and dark sides. You must not blame yourself."
"Then what must I do?" she asked sadly as she lay back against his chest.
Stroking her brow and hair softly, Ben smiled. "Sometimes you must confront your deepest fears, your past torments. Only then can you achieve balance in the Force and drive your demons away. You must face him, whether it is in dreams or not. You must destroy the darkness in you; there is no other way..."
Nodding seriously, she slid off his chest and stood. Bowing to Ben, she made her way back to her room and lay down on the silky covers. She knew now what she must do; Ben had helped her to avert the disaster she felt so near. Closing her eyes carefully, she fell off to sleep with her mind made up. The path she would take in the morning would be the way, nobody could stop her now...
Another bad night had passed by and Miennya had woken with a frightful headache that made her head spin. She tried to relax with meditation but gave up as she could feel herself tense and unfocused. It had just been a long month since she had spoken with the Council. The dreams had gotten worse every night. The Dark side was tempting her again, calling her to come back so badly that her nerves were frayed. She had snapped at her padawan badly yesterday for missing a shot and the girl had cried afterwards. This made her feel very bad and added to the pain in her head. It felt like it was going to burst at times, a sign she was dealing with the stress very badly.
Miennya dressed and then walked slowly past the meditation rooms as she twirled her fingers around the pressure points. Looking in, she smiled as she saw Ben meditating. Opening it silently, she sat and watched. She liked watching the way others meditated, gave her soothing thoughts and they always looked so peaceful compared to her continued fight with the Dark Side. Meditation had been a real problem since she had come back; the memories of her life always crowded around her and distracted her to no end. Looking up, she noticed Ben staring at her as he hovered. Looking at him sitting there peacefully opened something and she launched herself into his arms and cried against his shoulder as Ben overbalanced and hit the floor hard.
Rubbing the sore spot, Ben lifted her chin up and forced her to look at him in the eyes. She looked so sad against his shoulder, her eyes betraying her inner turmoil so he asked her a question. "What is it, my friend?"
Shaking her hair, she smiled as best she could which wasn't a very good effort. "I feel so unsettled Ben, so stretched and worn. The dreams have been haunting me again, the rivers have been getting longer and more bodies have been showing up in the visions. I am worried, my friend."
Stroking her hand, he smiled reassuringly. "You have great sadness in you, my dear. We can all feel it and we are here for you always. We love you, every single one of us and we don't want to lose you again. Tell me and we will work something out."
Miennya nodded. "I feel the Dark Side in me, haunting me again. I have not had rest since I came back and it has worn me to breaking point. You must advise me, my friend. What must I do to find closure? I would be rid of my past memories but they keep coming and I am afraid that the mistake I made long ago will haunt me and spell the end of our Order. I feel a great swell of danger around me and this will lead to death and chaos. The Force is warning me of the approaching deaths of us all at the hands of the Sith. I caused this and I must fix it, though I know not how..."
Ben was worried; she was blaming herself for her suffering. He could feel the conflict in her heart, it showed in her now scarlet orbs. "You are not to blame, Miennya. You did nothing wrong and this day was long in the making for a battle between the light and dark sides. You must not blame yourself."
"Then what must I do?" she asked sadly as she lay back against his chest.
Stroking her brow and hair softly, Ben smiled. "Sometimes you must confront your deepest fears, your past torments. Only then can you achieve balance in the Force and drive your demons away. You must face him, whether it is in dreams or not. You must destroy the darkness in you; there is no other way..."
Nodding seriously, she slid off his chest and stood. Bowing to Ben, she made her way back to her room and lay down on the silky covers. She knew now what she must do; Ben had helped her to avert the disaster she felt so near. Closing her eyes carefully, she fell off to sleep with her mind made up. The path she would take in the morning would be the way, nobody could stop her now...