Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any characters related to J.K. Rowling's universe.

Author's notes: Well, what can I say? I've been so busy that I haven't been able to write any semblance of a good chapter for this story in such a long time. I apologize profusely and hope you all can forgive me. One of the reasons I didn't update, though, was that no one reviewed my last chapter, which is just as well because I was kind of unhappy with it. I didn't revise it as much as I would, because after reading it again, I only found a few problem spots, which I immediately revised. I also added a couple more paragraphs to it. I hope it's better now. Anyway, I hope you all continue to read this story. I'm not going to abandon it. It is definitely going to be RL/HP slash, but the rating will not change. With that out of the way, I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Chapter 6: Discussions of both Expected and Unexpected Natures

            Harry was still lying on the floor as Remus brushed himself off. After Snape had stormed off, Harry was rapidly trying to think of something to say, but nothing came. His mind was numb from being that close to Remus for such a long period of time, and while staring into those wide, amber eyes, he kind of just blanked out. If he hadn't, he figured, he probably wouldn't have been able stay still under the werewolf's intense gaze. Notwithstanding, he thought he saw something behind that gaze, but truthfully, he was a little too phased out to tell. Either way, he was digging very deep at the moment to restart his brain and actually get some words out of his mouth. All the while his face was turning deeper shades of red until it looked almost purple.

            Remus, on the other hand, was trying to collect himself and escape Harry's company as soon as possible before he did some other idiotic thing. The entire time he was staring into Harry's eyes, he was fighting an internal battle not to make any sort of moves on the young man. He was trying especially hard not to just snog the brains out of his best friends' son, but he was losing the battle with each passing minute. Thank Merlin Severus stormed in. Who knows what I would have done? I need to get away from Harry now, before something worse happens. With this thought, he turned and began to move toward the stairs. Harry, however, had finally found his voice.

            "Wait, Remus! I-I need to talk to you, about Sirius."

            Remus closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Just calm down; you can do this. Opening his eyes he slowly turned back to the young man who had addressed him and replied, "Sure, Harry. Just give me a minute to freshen up, alright?"

            "Alright," Harry said, a small smile creeping across his face. "I'll be in the library when you're ready." He then got up and walked down the main hall toward the library.

            After he was out of sight, Remus turned and continued to and up the staircase toward his room. Freshen up? What are we Remus, a seventeen year old school girl preparing for a date? Why don't you just 'slip into something more comfortable' while you're at it? His mind recalled that exact same kind of conversation back in his seventh year at Hogwarts when Sirius had been courting a young Hufflepuff by the name of Susan Baker. They had just finished dinner in the Great Hall, and Sirius and Susan were standing in the doorway. The animagus was whispering in her ear and the young girl was giggling very annoyingly. Remus had tried to ignore it but to no avail, his sensitive ears picking up every word of the conversation.

             "But surely, Mr. Black, you have done it everywhere possible in the castle, have you not?" giggled Susan trying unconvincingly to sound like a prefect.

            "Well, surprisingly enough, I have yet to do it in the restricted section, which is funny because it's one of my favorite haunts," Sirius replied moving in a little closer to Susan's ear and almost casually nipping the lobe. "I hang out there all the time," he said, the smirk eminent on his features, "Maybe we could pay it a little visit."

            Susan giggled more annoyingly this time and said in a sultry sweet voice, "Okay! Just give me a minute to freshen up, alright?"

            "Alright, love. I'll be in the library when you're ready." Sirius placed a little kiss on Susan's lips before he let her run off to her dorm.

            Remus cringed when he realized how similar this conversation had been to the one he and Harry had just a moment ago, and he wanted to slap himself for talking like that twit of a girl who was too taken with whom she thought was the hottest thing around. It didn't help that Remus actually did think that Harry was the hottest thing around. Mustn't think like that Remus. He's just a boy, nothing special. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding? Exasperated, Remus reached his room and went straight into the adjacent bathroom to improve his appearance a little. He decided, eventually, that what he really needed was a nice hot, long shower, but he didn't exactly have the luxury of time right now as he didn't want to keep Harry waiting; especially if he was willingly asking to talk about Sirius. He didn't think it would be that easy for Harry to just want to talk to someone about his godfather's death, especially this early on, so he quickly washed his hands and face and spent a second brushing his hair before returning downstairs to find Harry waiting expectantly on the sofa in the library.

            Their eyes met the moment he walked in the door, and again he found himself lost in their emerald depths for quite some time before remembering himself and taking a seat in the adjacent chair across from the fireplace. Deep breaths now, Remus. Don't let it get to you. Just be calm and be there for Harry. Alright, here we go. Remus nervously cleared his throat and began, "So, what do you want to talk about?"

            Harry sat watching his former professor with much amusement. He's so nervous. I wonder why. Lord he's cute when he's flustered. Harry blushed at his own thought and began acting in a similarly nervous manner. "Well, uh, you see…" Come on, Harry, don't sound like an idiot. "Well, um, actually first I wanted to ask you…um…what happened between you and Snape earlier."

            Remus, who had been thinking about how cute Harry was when he was flustered, was slightly taken aback at the question. He had expected his young charge would ask about Sirius first, but he did realize that that particular situation did merit an explanation. "Oh, well, you see, um…" Oh, Merlin, here we go again… "It was just that, um, I kind of lost it," he finished weakly.

            "Lost it? Was he being a right ass as usual?" Harry inquired wondering why Remus would have picked this particular moment to go ballistic on Snape when he had ample opportunity to do so in the past.

            "More so actually," Remus chuckled, "He made a few comments that I just couldn't bear. I…it got a little out of hand."

            "A little? I found him bound and gagged without his wand. I'm surprised he was able to get out without either of us helping him."

            "Well, any snake can do that, I suppose," came Remus' uncharacteristic reply.

            Harry balked. "I thought I was the one who made all the biting comments about Snape. When did that privilege come to you?"

            "I'm sorry, you're right. I'm feeling so out of sorts lately. I just don't understand how anyone could hold a grudge for that long," Remus sighed.

            Harry almost reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, but quickly thought better of himself. "So, where did you go?"

            "Hm?"

            "Well, you came in through the front door so you must have gone somewhere."

            "Oh, right. Well you see, I got so angry that I, um, did a little bit of magic."

            "Such as?"

            "I…apparated to Diagon Alley," Remus said meekly, a small blush creeping upon his cheeks.

            It was all Harry could do not to run over and pounce on the man, he looked so adorable. He continued to stare at the werewolf until Remus looked up and caught his gaze yet again. This time Harry could see that the older man was searching his eyes and he couldn't keep the contact, so he broke it, looking down at the floor and blushing himself.

            There was a lot of blushing going on in this house lately.

            Remus was a little confused at what he was seeing. He could of sworn he saw hunger in the younger man's eyes. He didn't dare to get his hopes up, however. He was not going to let himself get carried away and do something he might regret in the heat of the moment. Though at this particular moment, with that hint of red on Harry's smooth features, he wondered why not.

            However, he opted on changing the subject, rapidly. "So, you wanted to talk about Sirius."

            Harry recovered himself quickly. "Um, yeah. It's just that, well, I think I might have finally have started to move on."

            "Oh, wow. That's great Harry. How…well…how…?" Remus wondered how Harry could possibly have started the healing process when he, himself, was still wallowing in his own grief.

            "Well, today was the first day since his death that I was so preoccupied with other thoughts that I didn't think about him at all for quite some time. When I finally realized it, it just hit me that I have so much left to worry about, so much left to do, that I can't keep thinking about him all the time. It's eaten away so much of my life until now, and if I knew Sirius half as much as I thought I did, I would think he'd slap me upside the head a few times and bitch at me about sulking over him like this. Besides that, I also think that, in a way, it's been established, to both him and I, I mean, that we both loved each other, even if we never said it."

            Remus sat amazed at the words of wisdom that were coming out of the boy. If there were so many horrible aspects in the life of the young wizard from having to grow up so soon, one of the greatest things was the level of maturity and humbleness it brought out in him; so unlike his father at that age. Of course, Harry wasn't his father, and if anyone, especially Snape, thought about him that way, they should have been immediately to St. Mungo's for a mental examination.

            Remus let out a heavy sigh. "It's funny, you know," he said darkly.

            Harry became a little worried at the older wizard's sudden mood change and responded in a concerned tone, "What's so funny?"

            "The fact that I've been through this kind of thing so many times and I have yet to realize the same things you have." Tears were threatening to fall from his eyes as he continued. "Here I am, the older one, the one who should be helping you through this, and it's the other way around. Merlin, have I become so pathetic?" The tears came freely now, and he buried his face in his hand trying to pull himself together.

            Harry, seeing the distress of his former professor, and with tears threatening to fall from his eyes as well, walked over to the chair where he was sitting and caught him in an embrace. Remus leaned into Harry's body and continued sobbing as Harry petted his hair gently.

            "You're not pathetic, Remus," Harry said with confidence, tears beginning to fall down his face, "You've suffered through so much. To come out as the person you have after all the shit you've had in your life just amazes me. I don't know if I could have possibly lasted as long as you have if I were in your shoes."

            "You're much stronger than I am, Harry. You probably would have made a better run of it than I did."

            "Bullshit, Remus. You are the strongest, gentlest, most caring person I have ever known in my life. You deserve some happiness, damnit. Besides," he continued, his tone becoming extremely bitter, "I'm not even going to last anywhere near that long in my own life."

            Remus immediately pulled out of Harry's arms, grabbed the boy's shoulders, and stared directly into the green eyes that were the reflection of his mother's. "Don't say that, Harry! You are not going to die anytime soon."

            "How can you be so sure?" Harry spat, "I only have one purpose in this damn life, you know that. You know the prophecy!"

            "Your purpose in this life depends on you, not some prophecy! You can make whatever you want of this life. There are too many possibilities for anyone to possibly get caught up on just one of them. Besides, can you honestly tell me that you would have not continued to fight Voldemort had there never been a prophecy?"

            Harry was faltering under Remus' intense gaze and he finally gave in and dropped his own, yet again, to the floor. He stuttered out his response, "I…I…n-n…no, I wouldn't have. You're right. You're absolutely right, I wouldn't have." He looked back up into now golden-brown eyes with renewed confidence. "I wouldn't have stopped fighting. He's done so many horrible things. I just don't know if I can be a murderer, Remus."

            "You know Harry," Remus started, still with eyes locked, "murder is defined as one human killing another. Voldemort isn't exactly human, is he? I personally think he's more of a demon now."

            Harry blinked. "I never thought of it that way. Maybe you're right, Remus. That would ease my mind a little bit, not thinking of him as human. Still, to have to use an Unforgivable…I …Even if I hate her, there's one thing Lestrange had right: you have to mean it. I…I don't want to mean it," he finished desperately, his tears coming in waves and his body shaking uncontrollably.

            Remus pulled Harry's head down onto his chest and stroked his hair comfortingly. "I don't think you'll have to, Harry. Do you really think a simple Avada Kedavra is going to finish him? No, it will take something much more powerful and different than that."

            Harry had calmed down considerably, now, and he pulled his head up again to look back into Remus' eyes. "Do you really think so?"

            "I may not know everything about it, but I do know you shouldn't feel like a murderer in the end." Remus' hand was still stroking the raven black hair softly and slowly, and both were again locked in each others' gaze. "Is that what you were thinking about earlier, when you said you weren't thinking about Sirius?"

            Harry huffed a little from surprise and tried hard not to blush when he remembered what he had been thinking about earlier that day. "No, no it was…nothing important."

            "It must have been if it took your mind off everything that's been going on lately. Besides, you're blushing." A smirk crossed Remus' features. "Come on, out with it."

            Harry thought that smirk was going to be the death of him. Lord does he realize how sexy he is right now. He searched his mind desperately for something…anything that wasn't the truth, but he was starting to doubt if he could actually do it. But I can't tell him the truth, it would ruin everything. He looked back into the eyes that had returned to their soft amber color. He thought he sensed something in them that suggested…want?...need? What was it? It seemed as if his former professor was giving him a curious, yet…hungry, yes that was it, a hungry look. That couldn't possibly be. There's no way he could be thinking about me that way. Or could he be? If he was wrong, he was still going to have to think of a lie to say to resolve Remus' inquiry; but if he was right…Could he risk that? We've already said so much. Lord I just want this to be over with and out in the open. Maybe I can just tell him even if he doesn't feel that way. Maybe he can help me get over it or something…oh I have no clue.

            The answer wasn't coming easily, either. All the time Harry was debating what to tell his former professor, Remus was also battling with his body's impulse to move in and take Harry's lips in his own. Oh, hurry up and say something, Harry, before I do something we both regret. The tension was building in his mind and he didn't think he could take anymore when Harry finally looked as though he'd found his voice. Relief flooded the werewolf's brain as he knew his inner struggle would be put on hold for at least another few minutes; that is until his ears registered the words that came out of the young Gryffindor's mouth.

            "I was just trying to figure out…well…when I first became attracted to you."

            Harry watched as the calm eyes of the older man widened in surprise, and his stomach turned over suddenly with the realization of what he had said. Oh, Lord, I've done it now. He's never going to speak to me again. His lips were quivering, waiting in fear for what Remus would say. Minutes seemed to pass, hours in Harry's mind, though truthfully it was only a few seconds. Then every thought, fear, or expectation he had at the older man's response suddenly exploded and came to nothing as he felt lips on his own, tongue lashing out and begging for entry. His eyes almost fell out of there sockets, and he barely moved until he felt a strange, warm creeping of happiness come over him. He clamped his eyes shut and responded to the kiss passionately and enthusiastically allowing the tongue of the other man to enter as he, himself, lashed out with his own to do battle. There was fire under their fingertips and all over their bodies, running, flying, coursing through their veins and collecting in a certain area most of all. It was like heaven for both and there seemed to be no possible end to the incredible, wonderful feeling that consumed both of their beings…

            That is until a dark, slimy voice invaded the deafening silence.

            "Well, well. Look what we have here…"

Thanks to all who have read and reviewed my story.

Next chapter: "Oh, bugger…"