January 1975
The police brought mom home, she'd tried to steal something but she got caught. She said she hadn't touched it, that the sales assistant had put it in her bag, they didn't believe her. I think they could tell something wasn't right, they wanted to wait for my dad to come back. I lied, I told them he was working and wouldn't be back until later. One of them wanted to stay but they got a call over the radio and had to leave. I hope they don't come back, I could ask Mr Davis to come round and pretend, he did it once before when my teacher came round, but then he might tell them things aren't right and that mom's crazy and dad left. I hope they don't come back.
May 1975
Mom's still in her room, she's been in there for four days, there's no food in the house. I had to ask Mrs Bernitas at number 12 if she'd cook us something. I told her mom had the flu. I don't think she believed me, she still made us food though. I don't like asking other people for food, what if they tell somebody, they might take us away. But Eric was hungry, well I was too and I didn't know what else to do so I asked her. She was really nice to us. I hope mom comes out soon. Every time I go in she's painting, she ignores me it's like I don't exist. Eric used to be able to get her talk but he can't now she ignores him too.
Thanks Giving 1975
It was Thanks Giving yesterday, me and Eric went to dads, we told mom we were going to a friends in case she got upset. We had a really good day, dad had cooked turkey and everything, it was good to see him again. I don't see him very often, Eric sees him more. Dad said we could stay if we wanted. I nearly said yes, Eric did, but I wanted to go back home as mum had probably cooked, not that I was hungry anymore. Dad took me home, he wouldn't come in, he just said he would drop Eric off in the morning and drove off.
Mom was mad when I didn't bring Eric home. I had to tell her where he was. She started screaming at me about why had we gone to see him after he left us, and wasn't she good enough. I tried to tell her she was, that I loved her but she wouldn't listen. She started banging the pots about in the kitchen, she was getting angrier, and I couldn't get her to calm down. She picked up a knife, it was one of those long sharp, shiny ones, she started to come towards me, I ran. She chased me round the kitchen and the living room. I was crying, she was screaming at me, telling me I was a bitch, that I was turning Eric against her, how I deserved to die. I ran into the hall closet, I sat on the floor pushing my feet against the door so she couldn't get in. I could still hear her shouting she was banging on the door, she wasn't getting in.
The banging and the screaming stopped, I stopped crying. I listened, it was silent. I sat there for ages listening, then I heard her crying. I opened the door slowly, the knife was there on the floor in front of me, I pushed it under the cabinet so she couldn't find it later. I saw her, she was sat in the corner hugging her legs. I came out of the cupboard and she saw me. She started to get up and I stepped back, she said she was sorry and begged me to forgive her, I stayed by the closet just in case as she came closer. Then she collapsed on the floor and sat there crying, she kept saying she was sorry and only got mad because she thought I loved dad more than her and that she's all alone. She looked really sad and it was all because of me, I hugged her, still scared she'd try and kill me. I sat her on the sofa and made her a cup of tea that she drank while I tidied up the kitchen. She came in when I'd nearly finished and hugged me saying she loved me and she'd never hurt me. She asked me if I'd sleep in her room so she could show me that she loved me. I said yes in case she got mad. I stayed awake all night just in case. She didn't do anything, yet I didn't close my eyes so that she wouldn't kill me. When dad brought Eric back this morning she was fine, like nothing had happened. I'm not going to dads any more, I don't want her to get angry again so I won't go.
March 1976
Mom wasn't there when we got back from school, she wasn't back to make us tea or to put us to bed. I made Eric tea and tucked him in, I told him mom would be back in the morning hoping it wasn't a lie again.
I stayed awake until I heard her open the door. I came out of my room to see her, she didn't see me. She was walking towards her room holding a mans hand. He saw me, he stared at me as he followed mom before he turned back to her. I went to bed but I couldn't sleep. I could hear them in the next room, I tried to block it out, but I couldn't stop the noise.
He was still here this morning. I came into the kitchen and he was sat there with a drink. His eyes followed me as I made some toast, I moved to the living room so I didn't have to sit with him. He said good morning as I walked past, I said it back, he asked me my name and I told him wishing he'd go away. He got up and started coming over when mom came out of her room. She hugged and kissed him, then whispered something in his ear and they went back to her room. He's not here now, I'm glad he's not I didn't like him.
The police brought mom home, she'd tried to steal something but she got caught. She said she hadn't touched it, that the sales assistant had put it in her bag, they didn't believe her. I think they could tell something wasn't right, they wanted to wait for my dad to come back. I lied, I told them he was working and wouldn't be back until later. One of them wanted to stay but they got a call over the radio and had to leave. I hope they don't come back, I could ask Mr Davis to come round and pretend, he did it once before when my teacher came round, but then he might tell them things aren't right and that mom's crazy and dad left. I hope they don't come back.
May 1975
Mom's still in her room, she's been in there for four days, there's no food in the house. I had to ask Mrs Bernitas at number 12 if she'd cook us something. I told her mom had the flu. I don't think she believed me, she still made us food though. I don't like asking other people for food, what if they tell somebody, they might take us away. But Eric was hungry, well I was too and I didn't know what else to do so I asked her. She was really nice to us. I hope mom comes out soon. Every time I go in she's painting, she ignores me it's like I don't exist. Eric used to be able to get her talk but he can't now she ignores him too.
Thanks Giving 1975
It was Thanks Giving yesterday, me and Eric went to dads, we told mom we were going to a friends in case she got upset. We had a really good day, dad had cooked turkey and everything, it was good to see him again. I don't see him very often, Eric sees him more. Dad said we could stay if we wanted. I nearly said yes, Eric did, but I wanted to go back home as mum had probably cooked, not that I was hungry anymore. Dad took me home, he wouldn't come in, he just said he would drop Eric off in the morning and drove off.
Mom was mad when I didn't bring Eric home. I had to tell her where he was. She started screaming at me about why had we gone to see him after he left us, and wasn't she good enough. I tried to tell her she was, that I loved her but she wouldn't listen. She started banging the pots about in the kitchen, she was getting angrier, and I couldn't get her to calm down. She picked up a knife, it was one of those long sharp, shiny ones, she started to come towards me, I ran. She chased me round the kitchen and the living room. I was crying, she was screaming at me, telling me I was a bitch, that I was turning Eric against her, how I deserved to die. I ran into the hall closet, I sat on the floor pushing my feet against the door so she couldn't get in. I could still hear her shouting she was banging on the door, she wasn't getting in.
The banging and the screaming stopped, I stopped crying. I listened, it was silent. I sat there for ages listening, then I heard her crying. I opened the door slowly, the knife was there on the floor in front of me, I pushed it under the cabinet so she couldn't find it later. I saw her, she was sat in the corner hugging her legs. I came out of the cupboard and she saw me. She started to get up and I stepped back, she said she was sorry and begged me to forgive her, I stayed by the closet just in case as she came closer. Then she collapsed on the floor and sat there crying, she kept saying she was sorry and only got mad because she thought I loved dad more than her and that she's all alone. She looked really sad and it was all because of me, I hugged her, still scared she'd try and kill me. I sat her on the sofa and made her a cup of tea that she drank while I tidied up the kitchen. She came in when I'd nearly finished and hugged me saying she loved me and she'd never hurt me. She asked me if I'd sleep in her room so she could show me that she loved me. I said yes in case she got mad. I stayed awake all night just in case. She didn't do anything, yet I didn't close my eyes so that she wouldn't kill me. When dad brought Eric back this morning she was fine, like nothing had happened. I'm not going to dads any more, I don't want her to get angry again so I won't go.
March 1976
Mom wasn't there when we got back from school, she wasn't back to make us tea or to put us to bed. I made Eric tea and tucked him in, I told him mom would be back in the morning hoping it wasn't a lie again.
I stayed awake until I heard her open the door. I came out of my room to see her, she didn't see me. She was walking towards her room holding a mans hand. He saw me, he stared at me as he followed mom before he turned back to her. I went to bed but I couldn't sleep. I could hear them in the next room, I tried to block it out, but I couldn't stop the noise.
He was still here this morning. I came into the kitchen and he was sat there with a drink. His eyes followed me as I made some toast, I moved to the living room so I didn't have to sit with him. He said good morning as I walked past, I said it back, he asked me my name and I told him wishing he'd go away. He got up and started coming over when mom came out of her room. She hugged and kissed him, then whispered something in his ear and they went back to her room. He's not here now, I'm glad he's not I didn't like him.