Big Hoobamawatzit

Friday(Week 1)

Disclaimer: We don't own InuYasha or anything related to InuYasha, or any other products or anime mentioned. But we do own the house(which is made entirely of used refrigerator boxes, duct tape and solidified spam), the front and back yards, and everything in the house(including the pans, sporks, microwaves, etc.)

5:30 A.M.

Harmonious silence.

Kikyou is scheming ways to annoy the cast.

Jaken is kneeling in front of one of the garden gnomes praying to his Gnome God asking for freedom from "this Hell Hole with no cigarettes or respect for the Gnome Lords!"

Kagome is drooling in her sleep.

InuYasha has slept walk during the night and is now in the kitchen sleeping on the microwave clutching a fluffy pink bunny toy and a pan.

Sango is muttering "Miroku...." in her sleep.

Miroku is muttering "Sango...." in his sleep.

Kouga is still asleep in the air ducts, dusty as ever.

Fred is precariously perched on a ceiling fan, stalking Shippou.

Shippou is sound asleep and unaware of his present danger.

Sesshoumaru is sleeping in a silky pink nightgown that he "borrowed" from Kagome, and wearing an avacado mask with cucumbers over his eyes.

Naraku is cuddled next to Sesshoumaru.

6:01 A.M.

Kikyou is complaining to camera B7 that it is freezing in the house, despite the fact that dead people are unaffected by cold temperatures. She wanders to the thermostat and turns the heater on full blast, laughing sinisterly.

6:14 A.M.

Everyone is still sound asleep, but some are becoming uncomfortable as the heater warms the house.

6:19 A.M.

A loud yelp of pain wakes up everyone and they hurry to where the noise came from. Kouga crashes through Sesshoumaru and Naraku's bedroom ceiling as he tries to get out of the boiling hot air ducts. Sesshoumaru and Naraku come squealing out of their room. Kouga stumbles out covered in dust and with his hands over his eyes, "So much pink! It hurts to look at! I think I'm bliiiiiiiiiiiiind!" The cast stare in shock at the huge hole in the ceiling, then to Sesshoumaru and Naraku, then to the dust covered wolf. Laughing is heard from Kikyou, she collapses to the ground holding her sides, tears of mirth streaming down her face.

Kouga turns and glares at Kikyou, "YOU! You turned the heater up didn't you?!"

Kikyou sits up and smirks, "Maaaaybe."

Just before Kouga pounces on Kikyou, Big Hoo speaks, "Good morning! As a reward for your SOMEWHAT good behavior lately, you are going to be permitted to have a party!"

Cheers erupt from the cast.

Big Hoo sighs, " Anyways, I don't want to force my crew to have to repair EVERYTHING you broke, so your task for the day will be to clean the house up and fix all the large damages you made, before the party. Designate some members to make invites and preparations. Big Hoo signing off!"

The cast glare at Kouga, the one most responsible for the damages to the house. Growling is heard from a nearby bookcase, alerting the group of Kouga's guardian meatball.

"Doesn't that thing ever stop stalking us?!" Miroku complained as he inched toward his meatball proof room.

"Stalking is Fred's favorite game!" Kouga laughed, scooping up the snarling wad of meat.

Kagome takes the initiative to designate jobs to the cast, "InuYasha, Shippou, Sesshoumaru, Naraku, you guys do the basic clean up. Kikyou, Kouga, Miroku and Jaken, you guys do the repairs. Sango and I will do the invitations."

Sesshoumaru frowns at the idea of doing tedious cleaning, "Who will make the food?"

Naraku nods vigorously, "Yes, we will need food for a paaaaar-tay!" He does a little dance with invisible marachas.

Kagome sighs, "Okay. Since you guys are too lazy to do clean up, you can cook." Sesshoumaru and Naraku cheer.

Sango mutters under her breath, "You're one to talk about being lazy, Kagome...."

The cast breaks up and head off to their tasks.

7:00 A.M.

Kagome and Sango are in the living room decorating paper with glitter, stickers and markers. Sango is doing most of the work, as Kagome is busy watching the "A-Team" on the TV.

"Oh, I love Mr. T! He's soooo cool!" Kagome hugs a pillow to herself as she gets dreamy eyed.

Sango rolls her eyes and makes gagging gestures behind Kagome's back. "Kagome, who should we invite?"

Kagome looks thoughtful for a moment, "How about..." She begins whispering in Sango's ear.

7:16 AM

In the kitchen, Sesshoumaru and Naraku are baking cookies and other treats. Sesshoumaru is mixing the dough while Naraku decorates the sweets with little candy stars and moons.

"Maru-chan? Is this enough sparkly sugar for this cookie?" Naraku holds up a cookie completely coated in the red colored sparkles.

Sesshoumaru grins, "Its positively gorgeous, Nara-chan!" Naraku blushes slightly and places the overly decorated cookie on the cooling rack beside other similar cookies.

7: 38 AM

In Sesshoumaru and Naraku's bedroom, Miroku and Kouga are repairing the huge hole in the roof.

Miroku is balanced precariously on two stacked pink fuzzy chairs, holding a wood board over the hole. Kouga is standing on the dresser, attempting to hammer nails into the board from an awkward angle. Fred has been trapped under the waste basket by a certain monk.

"Whoa, watch out!" Miroku pulls his hands away from the wildly swung hammer. The monk loses his balance from his sudden movements and crashes to the floor, chairs on top of him. The board lands on Kouga's head, as do the nails and hammer.

Dark chuckling is heard from the doorway. Miroku and Kouga glare at Kikyou and Jaken, who are pointing and laughing.

Kikyou smirks, "You two are horrible carpenters. Remind me to never hire you."

Miroku, not at all in a joking mood, flips Kikyou the bird, "I don't see you doing any work, Miss Useless Spirit."

Kikyou huffs and storms out of the room, at least she tries to storm out, but ghosts aren't really capable of stomping down halls.

Jaken waddles after Kikyou, a pack of cigarettes from Gnome-God-Knows-Where clutched in his little green hand ... err claw ... err paw ....err WHATEVER!

7: 59 AM

InuYasha is in his bedroom. He is snickering to himself as he dusts the room. Shippou is tied to a broomstick, his fluffy tail serving as a duster for InuYasha.

"I-I-InuYasha, please untie me! This doesn't count as cleaning!" Shippou cried pitiously.

"This is MY form of cleaning." InuYasha growled, "Now shut up or I'll wash the windows with you too." Shippou promptly closed his mouth.

8: 13 AM

InuYasha has moved on to cleaning the bathrooms. He is washing the sink and counters.

Shippou is in the bathtub, scrubbing as hard as his little hands can.

"Oh, gross!" InuYasha pulls a wad of long silver hair from the drain. He clenches his fists, "Sesshoumaru. You'll pay for this, I should not have to clean up your hair!"

Shippou squeaks from the bathtub, "Eep! There's more hair!" He jumps out of the tub, trying to get the huge pile of white hair from clinging to his foot. "Its alive! Help, help!"

InuYasha sighs and pulls the hair off Shippou, "You idiot. Its not alive. Its just clingy."

Shippou collapses on the tiled floor, panting in exhaustion. "Th-thank you."

InuYasha boots the small fox demon out of the bathroom, "Go clean somewhere else. Where you won't bug me!"

Shippou scurries off in the direction of the backyard.

8:17 AM

Sesshoumaru is baking a large vanilla cake. Naraku is making an enormous bowl of Chex Mix, tossing in ingredients that have no place whatsoever in a Chex Mix.

Sesshoumaru places the cake batter in a Pichu shaped cake pan, "This cake is going to be so cute!"

Naraku peers at the cake pan, "Aww! I love Pikachu!"

Sesshoumaru frowns, gently smacking Naraku with a spatula, "That isn't a Pikachu. That's a Pichu, by far the cutest!"

Naraku puts on a pouty face and turns away from Sesshoumaru, busying himself with adding chopped onions to the Chex Mix.

Sesshoumaru flips his hair and ignores Naraku entirely, muttering something about "silly baboons, not knowing anything about Pichus and Pikachus...."

8:36 AM

Miroku and Kouga, having somehow successfully repaired the ceiling hole, are in the laundry room. Miroku is attempting to repair the washing machine, which has been acting up and spinning around wildly during washes.

Kouga is trying to mend some shirts he found with large holes. His attempts are unsuccessful, as he constantly stabs himself with the dull needle. "Ow! Stupid needle. Ow! Curse you needle....Ouch!"

Miroku snickers to himself, "Idiot wolf." He hears familiar growling from behind him and whirls around to come face to meat with Fred. The monk thinks quickly and snatches up a nearby tennis racket, smacking Fred viciously.

The meatball is sent flying, landing in the open dryer. Fred hisses dangerously as Miroku slams the dryer lid shut.

Miroku does a small victory dance as he turns the dryer on, cheering in triumph as Fred growls from within the machine.

Kouga is oblivious to what is happening behind him, still preoccupied with cursing the sewing needle.

Miroku, now in a far better mood seeing as his mortal enemy has been vanquished, returns to repairing the washer.

8:47 AM

Sango and Kagome have completed the invitations. Both sit in the living room, trying to figure out how to send the invites.

Being hit with a sudden idea, Sango yells at a nearby camera, "Hey, Big Hoo!"

Big Hoo answers in a groggy voice, "Eh? Whazzup?"

"How do we send these invitations?" Sango glances around the room, unsure of where to address Big Hoo.

"Huh? Oh! Go to the front door, I'll send one of the crew members to take the invites and deliver them." With a click the speaker turns off.

Sango, excited to have contact with the outside world, hurries to the front door. A boisterous knocking is heard from beyond the door as Sango reaches it. She opens the door and is bombarded by... forks? No, sporks! She nearly falls over as three odd looking chracters waltz in.

"Who-?" Sango is cut off by the trio, as they introduce themselves almost robotically.

"Sir Spork is me!" A teenage squirrel demon proceeds in an old fashioned bow with a goofy smile covering her face. She is dressed in a black shirt reading "SPORK", light blue pants, and black boots. She has wild red- orange hair and two black stripes upon both her cheeks.

"I be-ith Sir Squirrel-o!" About the same age as Sir Spork, the second squirrel demon curtseys with minimal curtseying skills. She is clad in a black shirt picturing a pinecone, gray pants, and black boots. Her spastic black and red hair sticks up in every other direction as she grins at the startled Sango.

"I am Sir Pan the Panness, the almight cook, not even Emeril rivals my skills, I am wielder of all things skillety and there-"

"Shut up." Mumbled both the squirrels.

The fox demon who introduced herself as Pan appeared slightly older than her two friends. She was wearing green, medieval style clothing, somewhat resembling Robin Hood's garb. Her not-so-neat brownish-blonde hair protudes from every side of her hat, excluding the two sections that her fox ears occupy.

Sango blinks, "You guys are..." she searched for a word.

"Weird?" questioned the one called Sir Spork.

"Yeeeah," Sango agreed cautiously, not wanting to offend guests of the house.

9:00 AM

"Who's there?" Called Kagome from the other room.

"Your worst nightmare!" Sir Squirrel went running toward the direction Kagome's voice was heard from. Sir Squirrel took a running dive and tumbled over the back of the couch, landing haphazardly next to the now frightened Kagome.

"Who the Hell are you?!" Kagome stared wide-eyed at Sir Squirrel.

"Like I said, your worst nightmare!" Sir Squirrel sat up and began jumping on the couch, causing Kagome to bounce off her cushion and smack her head violently on the table and collapse to the floor.

Sango, Sir Pan, and Sir Spork came running at the loud sound. "What happened to Kagome?" they all questioned in unison.

Sir Squirrel smiles innocently and points at the table, "The Coffee Table did it."

Sir Pan nods, "You really gotta watch out for anything with Coffee in it, they're really dangerous."

"Especially anything that spells Coffee as C-o-f-f-e-Y!" Sir Spork added.

All three demons laugh. Sango frowns, obviously not wise to the inside joke. "Uh, don't you guys need to deliver these invitations?"

Sir Spork suddenly stands at attention, "Yessir, right away, sir!" She snatches up the invitations and races out the door. Sir Squirrel follows after her.

Sir Pan salutes smartly to Sango, "G'day, sir!" She runs out the door as well, slamming it shut behind her.

Sango sighs heavily, "What a bunch of weirdos...." She strolls off to the kitchen, not bothering to check on Kagome.

9:05 AM

Shippou is out in the backyard, attempting to rake up leaves with a rake five times his size.

Kikyou and Jaken aren't helping at all. They are enjoying tossing flaming matches on the piles of leaves, watching them burn as Shippou races around in a panic.

"Stop it, you guys!" Shippou pleaded, "You could burn down the house!"

Kikyou stopped her arm as she raised it to throw another match. She seems to consider this for a moment before grinning sinisterly, "All the better!"

Jaken nods in agreement and launches another match. A nearby pile of leaves erupts into flames. Shippou squeaks and throws dirt on the fire. Once the flame is quelled, Kikyou tosses her mini-torch on another pile, laughing evilly.

Thinking quickly, Shippou yelled at the pair, "Stop it! If you burn down the house, you could risk hurting InuYasha!"

Kikyou's eyes went wide and she immediately put out the match in her hand. Jaken, not really caring about InuYasha, aimed another flaming projectile. Kikyou smacked the green toad upside the head and gave him a death glare.

"Throw one more, toad, and you will find yourself six feet under in six seconds!" Kikyou warned.

Jaken swallowed hard, dropping his match into the pool.

Shippou sighed with relief, continuing his raking without any further disturbances.

9:14 AM

InuYasha is still in the bathroom, doing battle with the hair in the shower drain.

"Damn hair! Let go of me!" He swipes viciously at the long entangling strands. "Release me now!"

Snicker is heard from the doorway. InuYasha turns and glares at his visitor. Miroku is leaning against the doorway, wearing a smug expression.

"What do you want, monk?" InuYasha snaps.

Miroku smiles wickedly, "Shall I destroy the evil hair that is tormenting you, InuYasha? I have had quite a bit of luck," he smirks again, "vanquishing possessed creatures today."

InuYasha looks confused for a moment. Kouga walks past the doorway, singing sorrowfully, "I lost my poor meatball, all covered in fuzz..."

"You got rid of....that THING?!" InuYasha stares at Miroku, who nods in reply.

"I did. It is no more!" He is on the verge of doing a victory dance when he hears an all too familiar snarl behind him. He turns, staring wide-eyed at the meatball at his feet.

Fred has grown quite a bit by absorbing lint and clothing in the dryer. And now he is out for revenge. Just before the sinister meat attacks, Kouga scoops him up, "Fred! You're alive! And you've grown!" He hugs the meatball and walks away.

Miroku breathes a huge sigh of relief, "That thing almost ATE me!"

InuYasha is now the one wearing the smug look, "What was that about you vanquishing possessed creatures?"

"Oh shut up, mutt." Miroku storms off to his meatball proof room to devise another scheme to destroy Fred.

InuYasha resumes his battle against the clinging silver hairs.

9: 27 AM

Sesshoumaru is making drinks for the party. He has concocted oddly colored lemonade with the aroma of roses, green apple juice with blue smoke wafting from it and snow-cones that have a certain resemblance to margaritas.

Naraku peers at the drinks nervously, "Sesshie, you may be good at baking and cooking and stir frying and roasting and broiling and all that stuff, but you're no good at drinks."

Sesshoumaru gives Naraku a warning glare, "Don't judge a book by its cover."

Naraku nods as he turns away to prepare taco and burrito ingredients, muttering under his breath, "But I will judge a drink by the slimey goop crawling out of it..."

9:45 AM

Kouga enters the living room looking triumphant, "What a great day!"

Sango, seated on the floor watching Invader Zim, doesn't look up at the wolf, "How so?"

"Because all the repairs are done, Fred's grown bigger and Miroku is locked away in his room where he won't bother poor Fred." Kouga replies as he hops onto the couch, "Ooo! I love this show! Ultra Peepi is the best, that radioactive hamster reminds me of Fred."

Sango puts a finger to her lips, "Sshh! You just interrupted the great Gir!"

"Sorry..."

Shippou, followed by Kikyou and Jaken, enters the room, "Hi guys!"

"Sshhh!" Both Kouga and Sango reprimand.

Jaken stares at the screen, "The Gnome Gods..." He races up to the TV, bowing and groveling before it, "My Great and All Powerful Gnome Gods, I am at your mercy!"

"Get out of the way! I can't see Dib!" Sango yells, booting the green ... thing away from the TV.

Kikyou and Shippou take their seats on the couch--or on the still unconscious Kagome in Shippou's case--to watch the enthralling, maniacal show.

10:02 AM

InuYasha exits the bathroom, his arms raised victoriously above his head, "I have conquered the clingy silver hairs of DOOM!"

Shippou applaudes the hanyou as he enters the living room, "Yay! No more grabby evil hairs!"

Kouga glances at InuYasha, "Are you going to use that hair for anything, dog breath?"

InuYasha looks disgusted, "Hell no!"

"Good, Fred go eat your lunch." Kouga nudges the larger-than-normal meatball towards the bathroom.

Sango, Shippou and InuYasha shudder, "Eww."

10:14 AM

Sesshoumaru and Naraku enter the dining room laden with shiny silver trays. Each of them places the trays of food on the beautiful new extra-large all maple dining room table, provided by Pelstos' Furniture and Liquor, where you can get drunk and pass out on the couch or table of your dreams!

Sesshoumaru sniffs the air, "Is something burning?"

Naraku sniffs too, "I don't know, Sesshie, my nose isn't as good as yours."

"Ack! My Pichu cake!" Sesshoumaru races back into the kitchen to rescue his cake.

Naraku shrugs and continues to carry trays from the kitchen to the table.

10:29 AM

Sesshoumaru returns from the kitchen with his Pichu cake, properly decorated with yellow, black and red frosting, "I saved it!"

Naraku stops hanging balloons from the roof to clap, "Bravo! It looks stupendous, Snuggle-tush!"

Sesshoumaru bows elegantly, "I know, I know." He picks up some pink and white streamers, "Now, to make this place look good!" He begins to decorate with Naraku.

10:41 AM

Miroku exits from his bedroom and creeps cautiously into the living room, where most of the cast is still watching Invader Zim. Seeing no meatball present, he flops down beside Sango.

Miroku receives a light slap from Sango for trying to use her lap as a pillow. Sango permits the monk to use her lower legs though.

Kagome finally regains consciousness. She sits up rubbing her injured head, "Owww..."

Sango glances at Kagome, "Finally up, are we?"

Kagome blinks, "What happened, all I remember is seeing a spastic squirrel- thing and then I blacked out."

Sango laughs, "That spastic squirrel-thing was Sir Squirrel. She and her odd friends came to deliver the invites. Sir Squirrel had jumped on the couch, which knocked you off, and you hit your head on the coffee tab-"

Kagome suddenly jumps up with a startled squeak, "Don't say that word!!"

Everyone blinks in confusion, "What word?"

"THAT word!" Kagome yells.

Miroku, a devilish grin appearing on his face, asks innocently, "Do you mean ... coffee?"

Kagome yelps again, "Yes! That word is EVIL!"

Sango blinks, an equally mischeviously smile on her face, "What's wrong with coffee?"

"Stop! Please!" Kagome pleads.

"Are you afraid of the word because you got injured by the COFFEE table?" Miroku asks.

Kagome flinches away from Miroku, "Yes, now please stop saying that word!"

Kikyou snickers evilly, "Coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee."

Kagome screams and dives under the couch, where she cowers in fear.

Kikyou continues chanting her new favorite word.

10:58 AM

Sesshoumaru and Naraku, finally complete with their decorations, enter the living room to find Kikyou standing triumphantly atop the couch, chanting wildly, "Coffee, coffee, coffee!"

Shippou, being a kid easily influenced by adults, has joined in with Kikyou's chants.

Sango and Miroku are on the floor laughing, managing to say 'Coffee' between laughing fits.

Kouga is too busying watching the "Price Is Right" to notice anything. He sniffles everytime a contestant says 'Bob'. Fred has finished his hairy- lunch and is comforting the sullen wolf.

InuYasha, finally able to have revenge for all the times Kagome has said 'Sit!', is enjoying yelling 'Coffee' at the top of his lungs.

Big Hoo suddenly comes on with a boisterous, "Hulloooo!"

Everyone stops whatever they were doing to face the nearest speaker.

Big Hoo clears his throat, "As you all know, the party is about to start. Your guests are arriving right............now!" The doorbell rings and Big Hoo signs off with a laugh, "I'm so psychic."

"Psycho, the word is Psycho," murmurs Miroku.

Sango leaps to her feet to greet their guests. She swings open the door to admit a tall blonde man dressed in a red trench coat and a slightly shorter bluish-black haired man in a blue suit.

"Hello!" the blonde greeted merrily.

"What's up?" the other man nodded to Sango.

Sango smiled, "Hi Vash, hey Wolfwood. Come in!" She stood back to allow the two guests to enter.

As she closed the door someone's voice called, "Wait, please, Ms. Sango."

Sango opened the door again so more guests could enter. A young boy with silver hair and distant violet eyes smiled sweetly as he walked in, followed by an orange-haired boy with sharp crimson eyes and two dark eyed, black haired men, one with a grin on his face, the other wore a scowl.

"Yuki, Kyo, Shigure, Hatori! Hi!" Sango greeted the four new arrivals.

A bouncy blonde young boy and a white haired gothic young man entered behind Hatori and Shigure.

"Guten-tag, Sango-chan! You invited me! I'm so happy!" The little blonde glomped Sango and in a puff of smoke he disappeared, replaced by a kawaii little yellow bunny.

The white-haired boy sweatdropped, "Momiji..."

Sango laughed, picking up the rabbit, "It's okay, Hatsuharu."

Kagome hopped around happily, "I'm so glad you all came!"

The rest of the BH cast watched the unfamiliar guests as they made their way to the dining room.

There was loud, obnoxious--and oddly familiar--knocking on the door, making Sango and Kagome freeze. Without waiting for someone to answer, Sir Squirrel, Sir Spork and Sir Pan crashed through the door, followed by another girl with burgundy hair, white ferret ears and tail; she was dressed in baggy pants and a shirt.

"We're heeeeeeeeeeeeeere! And we brought Sir Spam!" Sir Squirrel announced cheerfully gesturing to the new nut-case.

Vash clapped, "Sir Squirrel!" The tall blonde raced up to the demon, hugging her.

Sir Spork grinned wickedly, hug-tackling Kyo from behind, "Kyo-kun! I missed you!" She grinned down at Kyo-turned-orange-cat who glared back at her.

Sir Pan promptly glomped Wolfwood, who patted her head while laughing.

Sir Spam tailed Hatori, ogling him with adoring eyes.

Kouga tapped Sango's shoulder, "Why did you invite those weirdos?"

Sango sweatdropped, "I didn't. They must have invited themselves."

Sir Squirrel, sitting on Vash's shoulders, called to Sango, "Hey! I saw your last three guests heading up the walkway outside!"

The BH cast turned to face the open door, where three figures stood.

Kouga growled, "Who the Hell invited that wench!?"

"Shut up, wolf cub!" Kagura(the InuYasha one, not the Fruits Basket one), the first of the three new arrivals to step inside, snapped.

"You shut up, wind witch!" Kouga retorted.

"Why don't BOTH of you shut up!?" Miroku shouted, causing everyone to grow silent.

The other two guests, now recognizable as a tall silver-haired, green- yellow eyed male and a timid brown haired young man, walked through the door.

Shigure looked up from the sandwich he was making, "Aya-kun! You were invited too!"

The silver-haired man nodded, "Yes, Gure-kun! Isn't it wonderful?" he twirled happily, crashing into the guest at his side.

The brown haired youth yelped, "I'm so sorry, Ayame! I'm such a disgrace, getting in the way all the time. Oh, I don't deserve to be in the Sohma family! Please forgive me."

Kyo glared at the apologizing guest, "Shut up, Ritsu!"

Ritsu bowed his head, "I'm sorry! I won't do it again! Please forgive m-!" A strip of duct tape placed over his mouth cut of the rest of his apology.

Wolfwood dusted his hands, putting the roll of duct tape back in his pocket, "Sorry, he was getting on my nerves."

Sesshoumaru glanced around, "Well, Nara-chan and I worked our tails off to make you all food, so eat!"

11:13 AM

Each guest and cast member hurried to their favorite snack present on the table.

Vash went for the donuts.

InuYasha took all the ramen.

Kouga had chicken and lambchops.

Kikyou did not eat anything.

Yuki enjoyed some onigiri.

Kyo, back in his human form and fully clothed, had lost his appetite after accidently eating some leeks slipped into his soup from Yuki.

Shigure, Wolfwood and Jaken sat in a corner and enjoyed some cigarettes provided by Wolfwood.

Hatsuharu ate all the veggies on the vegetable platter.

Momiji, after returning to his human form and finding his clothes, shared a huge pile of candy with Shippou.

Naraku ate some of Sesshoumaru's partially burnt Pichu cake.

Hatori ate a healthy salad.

Sir Squirrel and Sir Spork had some acorns.

Sir Pan fried up Naraku's Chex Mix and ate that.

Sir Spam had German based food.

Miroku had chili dogs, lots of chili dogs.

Sango, after a boisterous exclaimation of "BUUUURRIIIIITOOOOOES!", took over the burrito and taco platter. And she had some sausage.

Kagura had anything Kouga wouldn't touch.

Ayame only ate foods that looked pretty.

Ritsu apologized continuously and chose only to eat a box of Ritz Crackers.

Kagome didn't touch anything that remotely resembled coffee(i.e. cappucino, coffee cake, coffee ice cream, etc.)

Sesshoumaru tried a little bit of everything he made, only eating tiny bites because he was watching his calories.

Fred was the only one to drink any of Sesshoumaru's beverages, and it is now a proven fact that radioactive, possessed meatballs can indeed get drunk from margarita-snow-cones.

11:36 AM

After all the food had been disposed of, cast members and guests are enjoying a variety of activities.

Ayame and Sesshoumaru--who found they had so much in common--have started singing to Ricky Martin.

Sir Spam is busying talking in German to Momiji.

Shigure, Jaken and Wolfwood are still smoking, but this time they are sitting outside in the warm sun.

Outside, Sango, Miroku, Sir Squirrel and Vash are playing a game of Chicken in the pool.

Sir Pan is teaching Hatsuharu how to make delicious meals made entirely of vegetables.

Ritsu, Shippou, Kyo and InuYasha are playing a game of Super Smash Brothers Melee. And Ritsu apologizes every time his character does damage to another character.

Hatori is conversing with Kouga about how unsanitary it is to keep a rotting hunk of meat as a pet.

Kagura and Kikyou are enjoying ripping up the garden and watching Yuki try and repair it.

Sir Spork is delighting in tormenting Kagome by singing her favorite songs with rewritten lyrics(every word has been changed to 'Coffee').

Naraku is pouting in a corner, giving Ayame death glares.

Fred is gurgling in a corner, rather wasted from his snowcones.

12:05 PM

Big Hoo suddenly comes on, "AHEM! It is past noon, time for the guests to go home."

Whines and complaints are heard from everyone.

Big Hoo sighed, "I don't care if its only been an hour. You weren't supposed to have contact with the outside world at all, I just felt like being nice today. Now, if the guests will be so kind as to get their tails out of here, I won't have to call security guards."

"But Squirrel, Spam, Pan and I are the security, BH!" Spork reminded Big Hoo.

"I know that, Sir Spork. Why don't you take the guests to your home and continue the party there?" Big Hoo asked.

The four demon-security guards grinned wickedly, "Deal!"

Before anyone could even blink, Sir Squirrel, Sir Pan, Sir Spork and Sir Spam had ushered all the guests out of the house, leaving the cast alone again.

Big Hoo cleared his throat, "As some of you may have forgotten, today is Friday, which means someone is getting voted out of the house. I want you all to clean up the mess from the party, then I will announce who has been voted out. Big Hoo signing off!"

The cast members split up to do different cleaning jobs.

12:11 PM

Sesshoumaru and Naraku are in the kitchen, washing the dishes, cups and platters used in the party.

Naraku is giggling like a school girl as he feeds all the leftovers to Fred, "Hehe, this thing is like a portable garbage disposal!"

Sesshoumaru glares at Naraku, "Do not call my cooking garbage. It is a masterpiece no simple minded fool could understand and appreciate. Hmph!" He turned away from the baffled baboon with a flip of his silvery hair.

Naraku shrugs and continues feeding the bottomless pit of a meatball.

12:27 PM

Sango and Miroku are in the dining room, cleaning up the decorations. Sango is wrapped up in a long pink streamer, laughing hysterically. Miroku is covered from head to foot in pink, silver, white and yellow confetti, dancing atop the table.

Shippou enters the room carrying a pile of used paper cups. The little fox stops short, staring at the odd pair. "What did you two eat?"

Sango and Miroku grin, yelling as loud as possible, "BUUUURRIIIITTOOOOOOES!"

Shippou blinks, drops the cups and races out of the room to clean somewhere else.

Sango laughs and falls off the chair she was sitting on as Miroku climbs on the chandelier.

"Hehehe, its a MONKey!" Sango snickers, pointing at Miroku.

Miroku starts swinging on the chandelier, making monkey noises. There is a loud crack as the chandelier breaks away from the roof and comes crashing down.

Sango stops laughing to help Miroku climb out of the twisted remains of the chandelier, "Way to go, monkey boy."

Kagome enters to see what the loud noise was from, "Oh my God! What did you do?" She puts her hands on her hips, glaring at Miroku.

Miroku glares back, "Oh, go jump off a cliff."

Kagome's eye twitches, "Don't speak to me like that!"

"COOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Sango yells as loud as possible.

Kagome screeched and raced out of the room, leaving the monk and demon slayer to continue their antics in peace.

12:32 PM

InuYasha and Kouga are in the backyard cleaning up the mess of pool toys.

Kikyou is following InuYasha around, begging him to read her new poem, "Please, InuYasha, my love. Read my new poem, you were the inspiration."

InuYasha sighs, "I can't right now Kikyou, I have to finish cleaning up."

Kikyou glances at Kouga, who is trapped in a life preservor, "Cleaning can wait, InuYasha. Please?" She tries to look as sweet and innocent as possible which resembles a cross between a scowl and a pout with shiny chibi eyes.

InuYasha shudders, "Okay, okay. I'll read it." He takes the tattered piece of pink paper--which he recognizes as part of Kagome's diary--clears his throat and reads the poem outloud:

"I am Darkness, Death and Doom

I beat my reincarnate with a broom.

I am Power, Grace and Beauty

My reincarnate looks like Mr. T."

InuYasha stares at the poem, "Wow...." He shudders again.

Kikyou, misinterpretating InuYasha's words, smiles, "I knew you would like it." She snatches the paper back, hurrying off to write more.

12:36 PM

Shippou is attempting to use the vacuum, despite the fact it's three--maybe four--times his height and he can barely even switch it on, much less push it across the carpet. When he finally realizes his attempts are futile, he decides to use the much smaller, much lighter, hand held, portable vacuum-- which is still a bit awkward in his small grasp. He succeeds in vacuuming all the rooms and the kitchen and the living room and the bathrooms and the closets and the tables and the couches and the toilets and the roof and the ceiling and just about every possible thing he could... Though when he was vacuuming the pool, the Handy Dandy Vacuum decided it had had enough and it exploded.

Miroku and Sango, heard the explosion and, since they were done cleaning, went out to help Shippou clean the pool. They also helped rescue Kouga, who was still struggling to escape the death grip of the life preserver.

1:00 PM

Everyone has completed their cleaning and the house is spotless.

1:01 PM

Big Hoo pops on the intercom to announce some more 'fun', "Guess what, guys! We're gonna play a game!"

The cast, who had accumulated in the dining room when they finished their cleaning, sort of grumbled their lack of enthusiasm.

"We're gonna play Ruiner of Reputation-UHM, i mean Newly Weds!!" Big Hoo sounded a little too over-excited.

"But none of us are married," Kagome pointed out.

"I call Sango!" Miroku hopped around gleefully and received a glare from Sango.

"The teams have been randomly selected," Big Hoo lied.

"Well, what are they?" hissed Kikyou, floating closer to InuYasha in hopes he was her match.

"Miroku with Sango," Big Hoo was cut off.

"YIPPEE!" shouted Miroku and he glomped Sango, only to retreat from her before going through a near death experience.

"Anyway," Big Hoo cleared his throat, "InuYasha with Kagome..."

Kikyou growled.

"...Kikyou with Shippou..."

Kikyou growled again and Shippou squeaked in fear.

"...and Sesshoumaru with Naraku."

The two huggled and giggled, knowing their chances of winning were extremely high.

Big Hoo continued, "Kouga is the host and Jaken can keep score. Now, go into the living room."

The cast walked out, surprised to find their living room decorated for the game. There were eight chairs with the contestants names on them. Each chair held a pile of large blank cards, a marker, and either a veil (for the girls) or a top hat (for thr guys). Kouga ran to the podium and tapped the microphone, causing it to make that wretched screeching noise and InuYasha gripped his sensitive ears.

The contestants took their assigned seats and awaited instruction.

Big Hoo could be heard clapping on the speakers, "Let the games begin!"

1:15 PM

Kouga took the liberty to explain the rules, "I am your master! YOU WILL OBEY! Obey your master, or you shall be puished! Oh, such punishment will I give! I will rule! Rule with an iron fist!" Kouga held up his fist and was given a few strange looks as he continued. "Obey the fist! IT WILL RULE YOU!"

A member of the contestants mumbles, "No more Invade Zim for you."

"Do your job or you'll be fired!" Big Hoo threatened.

"Okay," Kouga whimpered and lifted his papers in front of himself, "let's begin, shall we?"

1:25 PM

"The rules are simple. First, the male partners leave the room. Has everyone decided who gets to play the daddy?"

Miroku wore the top hat, Sango wore the veil.

InuYasha wore the top hat, Kagome wore the veil.

Shippou wore the top hat, Kikyou wore the veil, much to her dislike.

Naraku agreed to wear the top hat, Sesshoumaru more than happily agreed to wear the veil.

"Okay, so when the 'men' leave, I ask the women questions. They will jot down their answers on the cards that have been made available. The men will return, and I will ask them the same questions, they must answer what they believe the female asnwered. The first four questions are worth 5 points, the last one is worth 10. You all with me?"

The crew nodded and murmured their "yeah"s.

"So then we will proceed with the same steps, only the women will leave. And at the end of the game there is a 30 point question. Let's start." Kouga rubbed his palms together, grinning evilly.

1:35 PM

The 'men' have went to the backroom of the large house, so they are unable to hear the women's answers.

Kouga began, "First question: What was your favorite child hood toy?"

A few grumbles due to lack of knowledge were heard and the veil-wearing contestants marked their answers on a card.

Sesshoumaru glanced up, an ashamed look on his face, "I messed up, can I have another card?"

Sango sighed, "You have ten cards in your lap."

"Oh, yeah!" Sesshoumaru acted as if he knew all along and wrote down his answer on a new card.

"Everyone done?" the wolf demon asked, awaited for nods, and continued. "Second question: Who is your least favorite person?"

There was giggling heard from a member, and when they appeared finished, Kouga hurried the game along.

"Three, who is your best friend?"

The contestants had to wait a while for Kikyou to finally answer after a drawn out bunch of "Hmmmmmmm"'s.

"Number Four: What is your most embarrassing moment?"

The 'women' seemed to take their time on this one. Finally they finished answering.

"The 10-pointer! What is the most erotic place you've ever made out, or wanted to make-out?" Kouga suddenly felt like a young lady at a sleep over, playing one of those girly games...

Sango's face became flushed, as well as Kagome and Sesshoumaru. Kikyou would have blushed, should she have had any blood or any modesty.

The contestants hid their answers, even though they would have to reveal them later.

1:45 PM

The men were seated, awaiting their part of the game.

Kouga cleared his throat, "Okay. The first question was your partner's favorite childhood toy? Miroku, what's your answer?"

He had to stop and think about his answer for a moment, "Uhhhhhhm, a plush teddy bear, Mr. Roar." He answered with confidence.

Sango blushed slightly and held up a card that read "Mr. Roar--teddy bear".

"Miroku and Sango are awarded 5 points," Kouga told Jaken, and the toad wrote something on a pad of paper.

"InuYasha, what was Kagome's favorite toy as a child?" Kouga was being a good host, which was surprsing everyone.

InuYasha grinned, "Easy! A stuffed dog, because Kagome's favorite animals are dogs."

Kagome sighed, holding up to show her answer, "A stretch-arm Mr. T doll."

A few of the contestants raised their eyebrows and looked at Kagome funny.

Kouga laughed slightly and went on, "No points for InuYasha and Kagome. Shippou, what is your final answer?"

Shippou stuttered, knowing if he got it wrong Kikyou would hurt him, "Uh, um, er, a rubber ducky?"

"What?! You're so stupid!" Kikyou proceeded in a relentless beating of the young kitsune, tossing her card on the ground that was written on with the words "ToYz SuCK".

"No points for Shippou and Kikyou," Kouga announced, only to get a death glare from Kikyou. "Uh, anyway... Naraku, what's your answer?"

Naraku sat for a moment, obviously considering his answer, and finally he simply said with a grin, "Curling iron."

Sesshoumaru squealed happily and held up his card that said in fancy writing "My oh-so-wonderful and beautiful curling iron!!!"

Kouga shuddered, "5 points for the quee-" Big Hoo growled, indicating the host better remain host-like or suffer the brutal consequences. Kouga laughed nervously and restated his previous sentence, "5 points for Naraku and Sesshoumaru. And this round's points end at:

Miroku and Sango--5 InuYasha and Kagome--0 Shippou and Kikyou--0 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--5."

2:00 PM

"Next question," Kouga began, ready for another round of flustered contestants and beatings of the fox demon, "Miroku, who is Sango's least favorite person?"

Miroku's face went blank, scared his own name could be on the other side of that card Sango held. He took his time in answering, "Naraku."

Sango grinned, happy they were winning, and held up her card with the word "Naraku" written in simple letters. Naraku sniffled and Sesshoumaru held the whimpering baboon to his boa for comfort.

"Miroku and Sango are rewarded 5 points," Kouga said and Jaken scribbled down points.

"Now," Kouga took a deep breath, indicating his mild boredom, "InuYasha, who is Kagome's least favorite person?"

InuYasha sat up from his lazily pre-sleeping state and triumphantly yelled, "YOU!" and pointed an angry finger at the wolf demon host.

Kouga lifted an eyebrow and looked to Kagome, "Well?"

Kagome held up her card, "Kikyou".

"WHAT!" cried the PO'd hanyou, "How can you hate her?!"

Kagome shrugged, "Jealousy."

There were a few snickers from the other contestants and InuYasha grumbled and sat back down.

Kouga looked to Shippou, "Who does Kikyou hate... most?"

Shippou grinned childishly, "Kagome, of course!"

Kikyou chuckled that ghastly chuckle of hers, revealing her card to say... well, it's edited: "that f---ing bi--- Kagome".

InuYasha drooped his head and ears, upset now that his lovers hated each other. Kouga scoffed at the pathetic dog demon and continued the game, "5 points for Shippou and Kikyou." And the toad marked their points on his paper.

"Naraku? Who does Sesshoumaru hate?" Kouga laughed at his own joke to himself that Sesshoumaru wasn't capable of expressing anger due to the fact that cement-related makeup restricted any facial movements... though Kouga's words were elementary school level vocabulary.

Naraku chewed on his tongue as he thought, "Britney Spears?"

Sesshoumaru bounced in his chair, "Eeee!" He held up his card that said "Madonna" in fancy script. "WHAT?" screeched the now distressed drama queen, "I thought I wrote Britney Spears..." he pouted, "I could have sworn I wrote it..."

Kouga clasped his hands together, "The round totals stand as:

Miroku and Sango--10 InuYasha and Kagome--0 Shippou and Kikyou--5 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--5."

2:15 PM

"Next question," Kouga began, "who is your partner's best friend?"

Miroku gnawed absentmindedly on his lower lip, considering two possibilities; he decided his final decidion and stated simply, "Kilala."

"Yay!" Sango lifted her card up which read "Kilala".

Miroku grinned proudly at how well he knew Sango. Kouga waved at Jaken, and the green toad marked points.

"InuYasha...?" Kouga awaited InuYasha's answer.

"ME!" InuYasha, again blurted out his answer without an ounce of thought.

"Uh..." Kagome showed her card that read the name of her classmate "Hojo".

InuYasha's eyes twitched, he didn't know what to say he was so mad.

"He's been my friend since kindergarten!" Kagome stated defensively. InuYasha crossed his arms and pouted angrily in his seat without saying a word.

"Heh heh heh," Kouga chuckled, "anyways, Shippou, who's the dead one's best friend?"

Shippou gulped, knowing he was going to screw this up, "Ummmmm ... best friend's suck?"

Kikyou, "Damn you rat." Her card read "Kaede". And Shippou was smacked with the card.

Kouga laughed and decided to move the game along, "Naraku, who is-"

Naraku cut him off as he gleefully squealed like a school girl on crack, "MEEEE! Oh, Meeeeeeeeee! Tehehehehehe!"

Sesshoumaru's card earned the pair 5 more points, "Naraku" in elegant writing once again.

Kouga drummed his fingers on his podium, having to take a few minutes to add the points, "This round ends with the points as such:

Miroku and Sango--15 InuYasha and Kagome--0 Shippou and Kikyou--5 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--10."

2:30 PM

"Last 5-point question," Kouga leaned on his elbows toward Miroku and Sango, "what is her most embarrassing moment?" Kouga grinned, he couldn't wait for the answers to this.

"The time she..." he knew the answer, but bringing it up would only be just as embarrassing. But they had to win, "When she was in a Demon Hunting Tournament and she was on the final round; she threw the Hiraikotsu and she misjudged her angle and..." he paused, preparing to run if Sango was mad at him. He finished quickly, "...The boomerang hit her in the back of the head at ninety miles an hour, knocking her out in front of her whole village."

Sango blushed, gulped, and revealed her card to say "Demon Hunting Tournament, I made a fool of myself". Miroku, in a friendly way, patted her back.

Kouga snorted a laugh, "5 points for you guys. Now, InuYasha?" Kouga couldn't wait to hear this.

InuYasha smiled for the first time during the game, knowing the answer. He blurted out excitedly, "I hopped in her window once and she was in her under garments and she was kissing her Mr. T poster and saying things like," InuYasha made his voice high and obnoxiously squeaky when immitating Kagome, "'I love you Mr. T' or 'you're such a big tough guy' or 'you make me so-'" InuYasha was smacked by Kagome, quite viciously smacked by the way.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Kagome hissed, beating InuYasha with her card that read "The time I fell on my rollerblades in front of cute guys".

Kouga was laughing so hard he had to hold his sides; he wiped away tears of mirth, and between laughs managed to point to Shippou, "Go, kid."

Shippou was giggling, though he hardly understood the joke to begin with, "Can I pass?" He frowned.

"No," Kouga wanted to see the kitsune get hurt again.

"When she fell in mud," Shippou shrugged and ducked, preparing for a beating again.

Kikyou smirked and flipped up her card with teeny tiny writing that said "The time I fell in the mud. Though allow me to elaborate, because I'm not that clumsy. I always pretend to trip and fall on an attractive man, so he will catch me and we can share a lovey-dovey moment (mind you, I don't do that anymore... Mainly because I'm DEAD!). But this one guy I met, however cute he was, wasn't all that smart or strong or attentive or rich or affectionate or brave or--Jesus, what the Hell did I see in this guy anyway?! So, anyway, I went to do my "Fake Trip and Receive A Passionate Lovey-Dovey Moment" trick (and shut up, so what if I was a hopeless romantic who named every flirtatious move I had?! I'll kill you if you say a word. Go ahead, tempt me!!) and he was watching God-only-knows-what (probably a butterfly... Did I mention he lacked masculine? No, I don't think I did, so yeah... He lacked masculine along with many other things. Holy shit, I dated a pansy...) and he let me fall. Into a big puddle of mud. And after that I dumped his sorry ass, though of course--the '"big man" that he was--cried... So there. Your novel."

The contestants along with the host--and somehow she attracted the attention of Jaken--read the card, giggling heard as they read certain parts and Shippou would mumble "huh?" every so often. Kouga raised an eyebrow, "When did you have time to write that?"

Kikyou smirked, "None of your business."

InuYasha blinked, "You used that move on me!"

InuYasha grinned, Kagome glared, and Kikyou scoffed. Kouga decided to allow Shippou's answer to be sufficient, so their team was awarded the points.

Naraku and Sesshoumaru had a pen thrown at them because Kouga needed their attention and they were too busy discussing how to improve Kikyou's move to make it more effective.

"Naraku, what's Sesshoumaru's most embarrassing moment?"

Naraku frowned for Sesshoumaru, "The day he ran out of most of his makeup and he had to go to the store without it. However much he attempted to cover his horribly disgusting face-"

"Hey," whined Sesshoumaru.

"Sorry Snuffly-Wuffly," Naraku blew Sesshoumaru a kiss. "Anyway, no matter how much he tried to hide his face, a group of kids saw him and screamed... It only attracted the other curious by standers. So, my poor Sesshly- Wesshly-Poo was standing in a crowd of meanie-heads that laughed and pointed at his face." Naraku wiped away a tear for his poor Sesshoumaru..

Sesshoumaru, ashamed, held up the card that said "No makeup, people laughed at me".

Kouga snickered, "5 points for you. The total point's stand as:

Miroku and Sango--20 InuYasha and Kagome--0 Shippou and Kikyou--10 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--15."

2:55 PM

Kouga tapped his pile of cards on his podium to straighten them out, but it seemed futile, "Okay, here's the big 10-pointer. What is the most erotic place you've made-out, or wanted to make-out?"

Miroku had to remind himself to breathe. He didn't care what he answered, he just wanted to know Sango's answer. He asnwered but it came out a bunch of incoherent mumbles.

"Speak up," Kouga clapped his hands at the monk to get his attention.

"Uhm," Miroku blinked, "On a beach, late at night, with a full moon casting an intimate glow across us-ERR her and whomever... A cool, refreshing breeze swirling around and making the beautiful shore flowers dance and twirl. With the waves splashing at their bare feet and uh-... Yeah, that's my answer."

Sango blushed, staring at Miroku as she held her card for everyone else to see "Against a wall".

There was a snicker, and Kouga had to throw a pencil to get their attention.

"Hey," Kouga yelled, "we got a game to play here, love birds! InuYasha, what's your answer?"

"She made out with me on a bed!" InuYasha knew for sure he'd get this right, because--for all he knew--that was the only place she's ever made out.

"Uhhh... InuYasha, I think we need to talk after this." Kagome sighed and showed her card that said "In a classroom".

InuYasha, as well as everyone else, stared wide-eyed at her.

Kouga blinked, "Ummm, anyway. Shippou?"

The young fox sighed, "In a cave."

Kikyou glared at Shippou, hoping they would've been the only one's to win any points. She revealed her answer "In a pool--Purr, call me 555-SOUL".

Kouga secretly scribbled the number down for future reference, "Naraku, answer."

Naraku became giddy, "In the kitchen!"

A few of the contestants turned green and gagged, someone made a puking noise and said "I'm never eating again!"

Sesshoumaru frowned, "Swee' Pea, you're not the only lover I've had." He held up his card that said "In an elevator".

The contestants were all either blushing, angry, sore, or sad. Big Hoo laughed happily.

Kouga finished up this round, "No one won points in that round... So, the end of this round leaves the points standing at:

Miroku and Sango--20 InuYasha and Kagome--0 Shippou and Kikyou--10 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--15."

3:10 PM

The women--and Sesshoumaru--were sent to the backroom, which was Shippou and Miroku's room. They were, to say the least, shocked at what they found. Miroku's wall was covered, top to bottom, with scraps of magazine cut-outs. Not just any cut-outs, however. They were revealing, some nude, photos of several attactive women, but something was different... all their faces had been replaced with pictures of Sango's face.

Sango, beyond pissed, started ripping and shredding the pictures off of the wall, growling curses to the monk. The three other people stared at her, worried she had lost it.

Having finished tearing the pictures off of the walls, Sango whipped out a lighter and burned them. She then looked through a few of the dresser drawers and found a thick red Sharpie. She wrote in large, harsh letters: "PERVERT!!". And when she was done, she brushed herself off, took a deep breath and smiled sweetly at the others.

Back out in the living room, Kouga was starting his questioning, "First one: What's your favorite food?"

The men wrote their answers and placed their cards face-down at the bottom of their piles of cards.

"Next," Kouga hurriedly continued, "What is the weirdest, most awkward, moment you and your partner have shared?"

Naraku had to stop and consider this one, for who-knows what reason.

When Naraku had finally written down his answer, Kouga proceeded promptly, "Where would you go on your honeymoon?"

Kouga snapped at Miroku, who had drifted off into one of his perverted daydreams. "Fourth question: What is your favorite thing to see your partner wearing, or would like to see them wear?"

Kouga, again, had to snap Miroku out of his daydream--as well as Naraku. "Let's hurry this up. Last, but not least, what was your childhood nickname?"

InuYasha paused, then quickly scribbled down his answer.

3:20 PM

The girls were back out and seated. Miroku commented that somebody smelled like smoke, but everyone assumed it was Jaken...

"Let's get this game finished," Kouga was certain this round would be very interesting. "Sango, what is your man-" he received a threatening glare and cleared his throat, "I mean, what is Miroku's favorite food?"

She answered immidiately, "Chili dogs."

Miroku's card read "chili dogs!" and Jaken marked points down.

"Kagome," Kouga lifted an eyebrow, "what does InuYasha love to eat?"

"Ramen," she stated simply.

Kouga laughed, "Finally, you guys got some points." Kagome glared at the host. "Uhhh... Anyway. Kikyou, what is Shippou's favorite food?"

"Candy," she hissed.

Shippou squeaked and lifted the card--which was as big as him--above his head to show "candy" written sloppily across it.

"Okay," Kouga reached over and smacked Jaken, "hey, pay attention, they've all won points!"

Jaken narrowed his eyes and scribbled some stuff on his paper.

"Now," Kouga sighed, wondering when this game was going to end, "Sesshoumaru, answer away."

"My Snuggly-Poofy-Dumpling just loves his banana cream pie!" Sesshoumaru gushed happily.

"You know me too well," Naraku trilled, holding his card up that read "Banana cream pies".

Kouga rolled his eyes, "This round's totals are:

Miroku and Sango--25 InuYasha and Kagome--5 Shippou and Kikyou--15 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--20."

3:30 PM

"Okay," Kouga cleared his throat, "Sango, what is the most embarrassing, or awkward, moment you and your partner have shared?"

She hesitated, apparently trying to choose which of the many moments were most embarrassing. "I'd have to say...when we were caught under the mistletoe." Sango blushed at the memories.

Miroku smiled, holding up a card that said "MISTLETOE!".

Kouga kicked the toad to make him write down points, "Kagome, answer."

"The time when I told him that I had feelings for him," Kagome glanced at the floor.

InuYasha held up his card, which said "The Mr. T thing... when she caught me staring at her... boy, was that awkward".

Kagome's eye twitched, but she said nothing.

"Alright," Kouga yawned, "Kikyou?"

"We never had an embarrassing moment," Kikyou growled.

Shippou held up his card, "No awkward moment".

"Sesshoumaru," Kouga snapped his fingers, indicating he answer.

"I'll have to say," Sesshoumaru tapped his finger on his leg in thought, "when we met. We both wanted to ask for makeup tips, but we were too embarrassed to even ask names."

Sesshoumaru held up his card to show his fancy writing again with the words "When we met, we wanted makeup tips but we has trouble breaking the ice" written on it.

Kouga blinked, "Okay, point total is:

Miroku and Sango--30 InuYasha and Kagome--5 Shippou and Kikyou--20 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--25."

3:40 PM

Kouga started the next round promptly, "Sango, where would Miroku go for a honeymoon?"

Sango mumbled to herself, "Anywhere with a room." But answered, "Uh... Hawaii."

Miroku held up a card that said, "Hawaii".

Kouga threw a paperclip at Kagome, since she was off in her own little world.

"Huh?" Kagome looked around, "Oh, um, Jamaica?"

InuYasha lifted his card to say "Jamaica". Kagome stopped pouting.

"Kikyou, come on, I shouldn't have to tell you to answer," Kouga complained.

"I'll have to say... Hell," Kikyou smirked.

Shippou revealed his card to say "Japan". He ducked as Kikyou smacked him.

Kouga threw a stapler at Sesshoumaru, but missed, "Answer."

Sesshoumaru stopped to think, "Hm... I'm going to have to say Alaska."

Naraku squealed and showed his card with the word "Alaska" written across it.

Kouga sighed, becoming extremely bored, "Total points are:

Miroku and Sango--35 InuYasha and Kagome--10 Shippou and Kikyou--20 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--30."

3:50 PM

Kouga was becoming irritated with this game as it neared its end, "Fourth question: What is your favorite thing to see your partner wearing, or would like to see them wear?"

Sango knew what Miroku's answer would be, "Nothing."

Miroku laughed and grinned, showing his card with the words "Not a thing" and a small winking face drawn on it.

Kouga tossed a ball of paper at Kagome, apologizing when it hit her in the face.

"I'll have to say... My school uniform," Kagome decided.

"School clothes" was written on InuYasha's card. Kagome jumped with joy.

"Kikyou, answer," Kouga instructed.

Kikyou glared at the demanding wolf demon. "It better only be my normal clothes," she hissed.

"Whatever she wears everyday" was written on the kitsune's card.

Sesshoumaru had caught on to Kouga's "Answer Fast or Have a Random Object Thrown at You" thing, and answered immediately. "I'll say... his baboon suit. I just love how well it looks on him," Sesshoumaru grinned.

Naraku frowned, holding his card that said "My bikini".

Kouga threw a marker at Shippou for no apparent reason, "This round's points are:

Miroku and Sango--40 InuYasha and Kagome--15 Shippou and Kikyou--25 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--30."

4:00 PM

Big Hoo came on suddenly, "Hurry this game up, guys. It's almost dinner time."

Kouga waved him off, "Yeah, yeah. Okay, last question. Ten pointer. What was his childhood nickname?"

Sango clapped, "Sausage Man!"

Miroku laughed nervously, showing his answer on his card that said "Sausage man".

A few of the contestants lifted eyebrows, wanting an explanation, but Kouga quickly continued.

"Kagome... don't make me throw more paper," Kouga theatened.

"Uh... the River Dancing Chicken." Kagome shrugged, knowing they were going to lose anyway.

"WHAT!" InuYasha jumped out of his chair, knocking it over. He lifted his card so everyone could read "Spunky".

A snicker was heard and InuYasha picked up his chair and sat back down.

Kikyou took a long time on purpose, knowing it wouldn't hurt her... she WAS dead.

Kouga threw a lamp, remembering that Kikyou was dead as it bounced off of her.

She snickered and answered, "Nutter Butter." She shrugged.

Shippou's card read "Spazzoid". And he was smacked by Kikyou, despite the fact that it was Kikyou's fault.

Kouga threw Fred at Sesshoumaru and Fred bounced off of the demon's pretty hair. Sesshoumaru screeched and waved his arms around, only to have some pens thrown at him, "Answer, dammit!" Kouga complained.

Sesshoumaru calmed down somewhat, "Um, he didn't have one."

Naraku's card read "No nickname" and had a crying face drawn on it.

Kouga clasped his hands together, "OKAY! We're done! Oh... No, wait."

A few contestants murmured their confusion.

"The death question?" Kouga tilted his head and read the instructions. "The women must answer a question... worth 30 points. Ladies, leave for a moment while I ask the men to write down their answers."

The women went in the backyard, wondering why this question was called the Death Question.

"The question is.... If there was one thing you could change about her, what would it be?"

The guys marked their answers with some hesitation.

The girls were called back in.

Kouga gave the points so far, "The previous points are:

Miroku and Sango--45 InuYasha and Kagome--15 Shippou and Kikyou--25 Naraku and Sesshoumaru--35.

Now, ladies, the last question, the 30-pointer, is this... If he could change one thing about you, what would it be?"

Sango stopped to think, "Uhh... my masculine strength."

Miroku grinned sweetly, showing his card that said "I wouldn't change a thing".

Sango blushed bright red, and tried to get mad at him, "You made us lose!"

Kouga rubbed his palms together, "Kagome, I wouldn't change anything about you. However, I'm not playing. So... What would InuYasha change?"

Kagome bit her tongue and thought, "I'll go with my big butt."

InuYasha glanced around nervously, thinking to himself 'No escape!' He held up his answer, which was "Her chunky legs".

"MY CHUNKY LEGS!? HOW DARE YOU!" She smacked the cowering dog demon and stormed out of the room.

Someone snickered, and Kouga slammed his palm down on the desk, "Kikyou."

"That I'm dead," she said it like it made no difference.

Shippou held up his card and it read "She's too mean". He ducked from the expected blow, but Kikyou floated away.

"The last one," Kouga sighed with relief, "get it right or Miroku and Sango win. Naraku..."

"I'll say," Naraku smiled, "my gender."

Sesshoumaru giggled, and showed that his card said "His gender".

Kouga, disgusted like everyone else, shook his head and threw a bag at them. "For the winners. Candy."

4:30 PM

InuYasha went outside to get some fresh air and think about how to apologize to Kagome.

Kagome was pouting in her room.

Sango, still blushing, went to her room to comfort Kagome and think about what happened.

Kouga, by instruction of Big Hoo, cleaned up all the objects he threw.

Miroku helped Kouga clean up the game stuff.

Kikyou was outside, talking with InuYasha.

Sesshoumaru and Naraku put their prize in a small glass bowl to share with everyone.

Shippou was busy spoiling his supper as he ate the majority of the candy from the glass bowl.

Jaken was outside in the garden, having some kind of AA Meeting with the lawn gnomes.

5:00 PM

"DINNER TIIIIIME!" called the joyous Sesshoumaru, who had cooked a large dinner in just half an hour. The cast filed into the dining room, each taking their seats.

Kagome sat across from InuYasha.

Sango sat next to Miroku.

Shippou sat on Kagome's lap.

Kouga somehow ended up beside InuYasha instead of Kagome.

Sesshoumaru and Naraku, who hadn't stopped bragging and gloating since they won the game, were seated beside each other, grinning happily.

And, naturally, Kikyou and Jaken did not show up.

Sesshoumaru hopped to his feet, pulling covers off the trays of food to reveal fried fish, steak, lambchops, salad of varying flavors, raw and cooked vegetables, steamed rice and warm, fluffy rolls with margarin. The entire cast stared hungrily at the array, quickly piling food on their plates.

5:12 PM

Sango glanced at Kagome, who was poking a carrot with her fork. "Kagome, why aren't you eating? You haven't touch any of your food."

"Because, if I eat, my chunky legs will only get chunkier!" Kagome glared menacingly at InuYasha.

Kouga, trying to be of some help, laughed, "You're legs aren't chunky, Kagome."

Kagome, with stars in her eyes, looked at Kouga, "Really?"

The wolf demon nodded, "Yea, they're the perfect width for bearing many wolf youkai pups."

Kagome stood suddenly, knocking her chair backwards and dumping Shippou to the floor as she stormed out of the room.

InuYasha snickered, "Thanks, Kouga. Now she's pissed at you and not me."

Miroku and Sango chuckled while Sesshoumaru and Naraku shook their heads in sadness. Kouga blinked, completely lost as to why Kagome was mad, it had been a compliment after all. Fred, sitting at Kouga's feet, gurgled his comfort.

5:15 PM

After hearing the disturbing sounds of Fred, most of the cast had lost their appetite. Each left the dining room to find some mode of entertainment.

Sango is in the living room, trying to play twister with Shippou, who was the size of a single dot on the plastic mat.

Miroku has retreated to his room, whereupon he discovered Sango's little "note".

Kagome is in her room, cutting up pictures of InuYasha and any that showed her legs.

Sesshoumaru and Naraku are in the kitchen washing the dinner dishes and chatting animatedly about possible new hair colors for the cast.

Kouga is watching Sabrina the Teenage Witch with Fred.

InuYasha is in his room, looking at pictures of him and Kagome.

Kikyou is watching Jaken as he continues his peculiar meeting with the lawn ornaments.

5:32 PM

The cast, one by one, has ended up back in the living room. Big Hoo suddenly speaks in a cheerful tone, "Wonderful timing everyone. Now that you are all gathering here, I shall announce who is to be evicted." He paused dramatically, causing the cast to shift uncomfortably in anticipation.

After a moment of extended, over-dramatic silence, Big Hoo cleared his throat, "The evictee is... Jaken!"

Jaken cheered happily, "I'm free! I'm free from this tobacco-less Hell Hole! Yes! I can buy my cigarettes again!" He raced out of the house as swiftly as his stubby little feet could carry him.

Kikyou crossed her arms, eyes narrowed, "Hell Hole? He makes that sound like an insult."

Kouga shrugged, "It is an insult."

Big Hoo, sounding fairly surprised, spoke up, "That's the most I've ever heard Jaken say since he arrived here. Why did he sound so happy? Is this place really that bad?"

With hesitation, the entire cast chorused, "YES!"

Big Hoo chuckled, "Good. Its supposed to be. Big Hoo signing off!"

InuYasha blinked, "That guy is one sadistic bastard." Most of the group nodded in agreement.

5:49 PM

Kouga, still glued in front of the TV, has now been joined by half the cast- -InuYasha, Sango, Miroku, and Sesshoumaru. the wolf demon points at the TV gleefully, "Jurassic Park is on!"

Sango, wanting peace and quiet, called to the remainder of the cast, "Hey! A movie is starting! Let's have a family movie thing!"

Kagome grinned, "I'll get the butter-free and salt-free and calorie-free and saturated fat-free popcorn." She hurried into the kitchen, Naraku hot on her heels to make sure she did not ruin his 'beloved Sesshoumaru's kitchen of absolute perfection and beauty'.

Miroku volunteered to get the REAL popcorn and followed the chunky legged girl and the pansy baboon.

Kikyou, taking advantage of Kagome's absence, sat beside InuYasha, who didn't seem to mind so much.

Shippou bounced into the room with a cardboard box overflowing with bags of candy, bite size cotton candy, six packs of varying flavors of soda, and other movie treats. A few of the other cast members stared at the box of sugar packed foods, finally learning the source of Shippou's hyperactivity.

Kagome and Miroku, escorted by Naraku, returned, each with a large bowl of popcorn. Everyone made themselves comfortable as the movie started.

6:07 PM

A commercial came on during the intermission of the movie. The entire cast stared wide-eyed at the ad for 'Enzyte: the male enhancement drug' featuring a happy-go-lucky man by the name of "Smilin' Bob" enjoying time in a hardware store. A few snickers and giggles could be heard from various cast members.

InuYasha suddenly had a coughing fit that oddly resembled words referring to Kouga.

Kouga had a similiar fit with coughs sounding like 'InuYasha'.

Shippou looked up at Kagome curiously, "Kagome, what's that commercial mean?"

Kagome blinked a few times, blushing furiously. Kikyou tried to "help" Kagome hide her blush by placing a pillow over her face. After a moment, InuYasha yanked the pillow out of Kikyou's grasp, freeing Kagome.

Shippou was not in the mood to be ignored and began tugging Kagome's sleeve, "Tell me, Kagome. I wanna know."

Miroku grinned wickedly, "Yes, Kagome, do tell us about Enzyte."

Kagome remained silent for a moment, trying to think up an appropriate but truthful answer, "Well, uhh, Enzyte enhances, uhm, the male part."

Shippou blinked in confusion, "What male part?"

"The, err, private part." Kagome answered, her face now completely red.

The kitsune frowned, "Why would anyone want to enhance that?"

Kagome glanced helplessly at the other cast members, all doubled over with laughter. Kagome blurted out the first thing that came to her head, "For her pleasure!!"

The male members of the cast fell silent. Sesshoumaru frowned, "What about for HIS pleasure?"

Absolute silence, excluding Naraku's fit of giggles.

Gagging noises are heard from most of the cast, except the utterly confused Shippou.

Miroku clapped a hand over his mouth as he stood up, "I think I'm gonna be sick." He raced to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

Shippou, choosing to continue being the pest he is, stared up at Kagome, "But why?"

"Because, well, " Kagome searched for an answer, pointing at the TV, "Hey, the movie's back on!" She glued her eyes to the TV, stuffing popcorn into her mouth.

Shippou gave up his quest for useless knowledge and resume watching the movie of dinosaurs run amuck.

6:34 PM

Another commercial break. Miroku has returned. Kagome thanked everything sacred and holy that there weren't anymore Enzyte commercials. But Shippou wasn't done asking questions.

Asking no one in particular, Shippou voiced the first question that came to him, "Why are dinosaurs extinct?"

InuYasha, fed up with Shippou's meddling, shouted at the top of his lungs, "Because you touch yourself at night!!"

Shippou, taking InuYasha's outburst to heart, placed his hands firmly on the couch as far from himself as his short arms could stretch.

InuYasha, pleased with his success at silencing the kitsune, sat smugly on the back of the couch.

Sango and Miroku were stuffing food into their mouths to muffle their laughter. Kouga chose to use his tail, Sesshoumaru was covering Naraku's mouth and vice versa. Kagome was staring into space, completely stunned.

The return of the movie was a welcome relief for all of them.

7:56 PM

With the movie credits rolling, most of the cast began to move and stretch.

Kagome carried a soundly sleeping Shippou into his room, placing him gently on his bed before returning to the living room to witness the first round of a DDR tournament.

Sesshoumaru was dancing magnificantly to the song Butterfly on an expert level, InuYasha struggling to keep up on Beginner level.

With InuYasha's defeat, Sango took over, choosing Freckles as her song. Both she and Sesshoumaru were on expert level, neither backing down in the slightest until Sesshoumaru tripped over his boa and fell off the mat, naming Sango victor by default.

Kagome hopped onto the mat beside Sango, smiling encouragement. Sango returned the smile, but her grin was more malicious and competitive. As the song Captain Jack started up, the two girls matched step for step. As the song drew near to its close, Kagome hadn't slipped up at all, until Sango decided to start singing out her favorite foods, including Coffee, which sent Kagome squealing to her room and to her defeat.

Kikyou was next in line to face off with the determined exterminator. The song Witch Doctor started on expert level, forcing both girls to move as fast as their feet were capable. Sango, not wanting to lose to an undead priestess, whispered quietly to Kikyou, "Is it my imagination, or is InuYasha flirting with Kagome?" Kikyou whirled around to face her beloved hanyou and thus lost the game.

Next up was Naraku, who couldn't even stand up straight, let alone hit the arrows correctly. He lost before the song even began.

Miroku hopped on the mat, waving to Sango, who was panting with the effort of dancing so many rounds in a row. "You've got a lot of endurance, Sango." Miroku remarked, winking mischievously. Sango studiously ignored the monk as the song Cowgirl started playing. Miroku was skilled, but he purposely let Sango win.

Last up was the far too energetic--and don't forget fleet footed--Kouga.

Song after song the two struggled to beat one another, though each was as skilled as the opposition. They both were far too stubborn to give up the winner's title, so the match ended when both of them passed out after playing one the most challenging songs, Sakura.

8:45 PM

The cast members were exhausted after the grueling DDR tournament, so they complied willingly when Big Hoo ordered them to an early bed. Kikyou stayed up later, placing some practical jokes for Naraku to find tomorrow morning in his kitchen.

10:00 PM

Shippou was sleeping with his hands as far from him as possible.

Kagome was curled up under her blankets, muttering curses about evil, heartless coffee in her sleep.

InuYasha was snoring like a walrus, sprawled out on his bed.

Kouga was curled up in a little ball on his pile of blankets and pillows.

Sango is sound asleep, hugging her picture of Miroku.

Sesshoumaru was wrapped in a cocoon of boas, mumbling something about awakening in the morning as an even more beautiful butterfly.

Naraku slept peacefully curled up in his baboon suit, mumbling about DDR not suited for monkeys.

Miroku, after writing "Miroku isn't a" above Sango's earlier message, has fallen asleep clinging to his pile of backup Sango's pictures.

12:03 AM

Kikyou is the only one awake, feeling lonely without the tobacco addicted toad to talk to, has resorted to practicing DDR nonstop. She has already entertained herself for an hour when she found a picture of Kagome and stabbed it repeatedly with knives, pens, pencils, scissors, chopsticks and other stab-worthy objects.

Shippou is muttering apologies to the dinosaurs in his sleep.

===========================

Whoa! We actually finished this chapter! It took of about seven months(give or take some months) of putting it off and completely ignoring it, but we got it done! Saturday is "Interview the Crew" day. Please review. If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions, feel free to contact one of us at:

Sango- AIM: I Love Handcuffz

Tsuki- AIM: DetectiveTsuki