"You're crazy."

"Probably," he admitted.

"Why would you even say that?"

"Because this is stressing us out. Being here. Planning it might kill you and me. But if we just do it, call everyone tomorrow, whoever can make it, fine. We go to the courthouse in Hartford, boom, it's over."

"Boom?"

"Boom."

"Jess," she sighed.

"Don't say no."

His eyes were pleading with her, and a sense of familiarity waved over her. She needed to think, she needed to clear her mind and do the right thing. The right thing for them.

"I, I just need a second, okay?"

He nodded, knowing not to push her. She didn't do well under pressure and they tended to fall apart the most when he kept at her. His spontaneity was something she loved about him, but sometimes his passion put her in positions that overwhelmed her.

She sat there, on boxes filled with notebooks and school supplies, tears streaming down her face. She was unsure if she expected him to come back in or perhaps she would just disappear if she became motionless enough. Wiping the tears away seemed impractical, just when she thought she must be out of fluids, more came in even greater flooding amounts. A shaking hand went up to her brow, her ring finger rubbing over the well-groomed hair there nervously. She needed to get up, to talk to someone. Someone rational. She feared if she got up and faced the dark empty suite, she would see herself in five years, in a dark and lonely place. How can she let this happen?

She stood, fleeing the suite as soon as she could. Out the door, down the hallway to the double doors. She didn't bother locking her door, she was the only one there and she didn't have time. Praying that he would still be out there, waiting, she ran as fast as her feet could take her. She stopped on the curb, looking around. She saw his car, just two blocks away. The motor was clearly on as the sound reverberated back as far as her. The stereo too, blasting lyrics to a familiar song that tore her heart into smaller pieces.

'Never thought I'd see her go away
She learned I loved her today
Never thought I'd see her cry
And I learned how to love her today
Never thought I'd rather die
Then try to keep her by my side'

She shook visibly, trying to figure out if she could run and get to his car before he moved it again. She wondered why he'd only gone two blocks before stopping. If he was entertaining thoughts on turning around. The song continued and she saw his form from behind, as tried to move her feet but felt like someone had glued her to the cement.

'Nothing else can hurt us now
No loss, our love's been hung on a cross
Nothing seems to make a sound
And now it's all so clear somehow
Nothing really matters now
Now we're gone and on our way, Now she's gone love burns inside me'

The car was shifted into gear and slowly the music faded from her ears. Tears that had slowed while watching him began to flow freely as the last bit of hope drained away with his disappearing taillights. All because of one word. One word she uttered out of fear. One word that she didn't want to say. One word because she couldn't imagine telling everyone else in her life the other answer. She walked slowly back into her dark suite, leaning against the wall, sliding down it with her arms wrapped tightly around herself as tears continued to fall.

She couldn't do that again. If there was one lesson she'd learned in this life, it was what it was like to be without this man. This man, waiting patiently as she tried to think about what was best for her. For them. What decision would lead to them going back home together?

"Yes. Let's do it."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

He brushed his hand over her arm, trailing it down to the tips of her fingers before intertwining his fingers with hers. She leaned back into him, from her upright position until her body molded fully against him. She felt his lips on her hair, the warmth spreading from the top of her head, through her body until it reached the tips of her toes. She wanted him to take away all her doubt.

He wrapped both arms around her, holding her as she fell asleep. He could feel her thoughts slowing down, as her fears about how to tell everyone oozed out of her pores and out of her system. He knew life was full of people who weren't going to approve of every decision you make. All you can do is do what feels right—and they both knew getting married as soon as they could was right. It'd been long enough; in all honesty he let it go on too long without making this permanent. The thought of her leaving had scared him so much he hadn't been willing to give voice to it. The idea of her thinking about it in order to make a decision terrified him. The idea of her entertaining leaving him terrified him.

That was when he knew. He had to ask her. Two months later, he did.

The next morning, she woke up secured in his arms. He had slept sitting up, allowing her to rest comfortably on his chest. She slipped out of his grasp, and walked over to her bag. She pulled out the to do list and knew it was time. The people she had to call about her engagement had to be called today. Lorelai included. She knew her mother wouldn't help her with this task; she'd be lucky if Luke could drag her to the ceremony.

"What are you doing?"

She looked up at him; he winced as he tried to move his head. She took the phone and paper, crawling back into bed next to him. Seated on her knees before him, she gave him a brave smile.

"Calling wedding guests."

"Huh."

"What?"

"Nothing, I was wondering if that was a dream or not."

"Having second thoughts?"

"No, I think we need to. I think...it's just that I should have, before now," he started to explain, shaking his head gingerly.

"Shh," she pressed her lips to his to quiet him. "I have some phone calls to make."

He nodded, and waited silently to act as silent moral support. It wasn't the first time they'd done this. Two years prior, they sat just like this, in bed at home, her on the phone and him waiting with baited breath, at the ready when she needed him.

She was clad in a camisole and matching gray boy shorts. It was her veritable uniform during the summer when they were home. She had the same outfit in every color known to man. It showed off all the right curves, and secretly it drove him crazier than any silky lingerie she could ever put on. It was comfortable and allowed her to move, which was much more her than some overly fancy piece of scratchy lace. She had dialed the phone number slowly; he knew she didn't want to make the call. She gave her name, and was instantly put on hold, her face scrunching up as the awful Musak played on the line. He rubbed slow circles on her back, unsure exactly what to say or do to make this bearable for her. The entire last week had been filled with tension, apprehension and uncertainty running rampant through their apartment.

"Yes, I'm here," she bit her lower lip, listening intently to the voice on the other end.

He stopped moving, he felt as if the whole world had taken a breather from rotating. He watched her as if she might break in front of his eyes.

"I see. Thank you."

She pushed the talk button and lay the phone down gingerly next to them on the quilt she fell in love with when they went to a street art fair the year prior. She loved quilts, mainly because of her mother. They reminded her of home, and she had said that a quilt makes a place homier as they purchased it from the vendor.

"It must have been stress," her voice cracked, the tears coming on stronger than she had expected. She fell into his waiting arms, and cried so hard that she shook both him and her. He couldn't hold her tightly enough.

"I didn't even think I wanted it. I don't know why I'm crying," she sniffed as she pulled back from him a little, trying to wipe away the remainder of the tears.

"I know," he reassured her. "I know."

"Mom? Good morning. I didn't mean to wake you. ... No, actually we wanted to know what you were up to today. ... No, actually this evening. ... We're getting married."

She winced, and held the phone away from her ear for a second. Jess actually jumped back a little at the reaction.

"Mom, calm down. ... No, I haven't lost my mind. ... We just think it's silly to have a long engagement. ... Is Luke there? ... No, Mom, I think you have every right to be surprised by this. ... Tonight in Hartford. ... Courthouse. ... We can talk about that later. ... No, we'll still meet you for lunch. ... I promise."

She hung up and looked to Jess, who looked like he might rather do this alone.

"Well?"

"She wanted to know if I was crazy, then she went on about how and when and where. Then she wanted to know if we were going to have some sort of formal reception at some point. Then she told me not to get married before I saw her next."

Jess sighed. "But she didn't say she wouldn't come?"

"No. We're still meeting her for lunch, and I think maybe you should talk to Luke first, he can help calm her."

"Who's next?"

"My Dad."

"Then?"

"Grandparents, Lane. Do you need to tell anyone?"

"Nope. Dad can't fly out on this short of notice, not that he would anyway. I'll just call him later. Mom—who knows where she is. I just, don't need that, you know?"

"She loves you, Jess."

"Rory, I don't want to call her. She's probably traveling anyway."

"It's winter."

"So?"

"So, those fairs are summer circuits."

"You pay way too much attention when other people talk."

"It's my job," she smiled.

"Fine. I'll call her. She won't come, though."

A few hours later, Jess and Rory walked to Luke's. It was freezing, but it was a clear sunny day, no trace of clouds and no chance of snow. Lorelai would say it's an omen. Rory put the thoughts out of her head and took a deep breath, letting the cold air fill her lungs before they walked into Luke's. Lorelai was nowhere to be seen, but Luke came up to them and motioned for the couple to follow him. He headed up to the apartment, not bothering to see if they were following him. Jess looked around the old apartment, now a proper office space again, also doubling as storage space for what Lorelai had called his 'icky bachelor belongings' that hadn't made the trip to the house when he moved in. He was actually glad to see the apartment looking different.

"Okay, look, I talked to Lorelai. She's not thrilled, but she wants to be there, I know she does. She won't miss this. Just, remember that this hasn't been the easiest time for her. Rory, I don't want you to feel badly, but when you left, she just ... it was really hard for her."

"I know," she managed, surprised to see Luke taking such an active role. She should have known, he would do anything for her mother. "I never meant to hurt her, I just, this is the way things had to be," she tried to explain.

His facial features softened as he looked at the two. "I know. Just, tread lightly and tonight we'll all be celebrating. It might be a good idea, for the two of you to talk to her. Separately. You," he pointed at Rory, "tell her everything that's gone on in the past few years. Leave no detail unturned. And you," he pointed to Jess, "do this right."

"You can't be serious," he protested, understanding Luke's meaning.

"To quote a young slacker I once knew, 'As a heart attack.' Chris is coming?" he asked Rory.

She nodded in response.

"Then you sit your ass down and talk to both of them. Intentions, permission, the whole deal. I'm serious."

"What, no dowry?" Jess asked, mocking his uncle.

"I won't have another four years like the last four. Got me?" his tone lowered and he all but growled at Jess. Rory was a little taken back. "This is just how things are handled."

Jess nodded, putting his arm around Rory's waist.

"Good. Now get downstairs, she'll be here any second. We never had this conversation."

AN: thanks for all the support of this story. You reviewers rock! You also spur me on to work on the story more, hint, hint. wink