Disclaimer: I own nothing...nor does my partner in crime, Ale the auror (my co-author...I love you man). All credit goes to our favorite author (polite applause): J.K. Rowling!

A/N: I am so happy! I got reviews! Omg....you people rock! I love you all! I got six reviews...my co-author also loves you! Party on, man! And keep the reviews coming!

Chapter 2:

Would you be a doll and pass the rum please?

"Damn stupid old cracker, what the hell was he thinking? A mystery party game? I've told him to lay off those damn lemon drops." Harry grumbled to himself as he emerged from the bathroom wearing his professor costume. "What the heck is up with this costume? It's purple! God I hate that old geezer!"

Ron also came out in his costume as well. "I don't know, Harry. I kinda like these costumes." He stated as he adjusted his monocle and his pimp cane.

Just then, Hermione and Ginny bumped into them into the hall. Hermione was dressed like Marilyn Monroe and Ginny looked like a French maid out of a porno.

"Ron...you look like the monopoly man." Hermione snorted in between her fits of giggles. "That's hilarious."

"Aw, and you look like an alligator." Ron shot back turning red. Hermione just sat in confusion, completely missing whatever insult he had tried to throw at her.

Then Ron looked at Harry who was staring at Ginny funny. He then realized why and punched Harry. "Ginny! You're dressed like a whore! Quit staring Harry!" Ron then kicked Harry. Harry cried.

The four strolled down the corridor leading to the library, Harry grumbling about his costume, bruised knee, and occasionally sneaking glances at Ginny when Ron wasn't looking. Ron pimp-walked down the hallway, while Hermione looked at him like he was an idiot, and Ginny just nodded and smiled.

Rounding, a corner, they saw what appeared to be something very green.

"It's the jolly-green giant!!" Harry exclaimed. "Can I have some asparagus? That stuff is good."

"Shut up Harry, it's not the jolly-green giant, it's just Malfoy," Hermione explained. Ron, Ginny, and Draco all looked confusedly at Hermione and Harry, but neither explained.

Harry snorted. "Nice costume, Malfoy."

Draco sneered, "Yours too, Potter, purple really suits you, with your personality and all."

Harry twitched, then ran off too the nearest bathroom, sobbing and shouting "I….AM….NOT……GAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!"

But, unfortunately, in Harry's fit, he ran into the doorframe and was knocked unconscious. Everyone stared.

"Rrrrrriiiggghhhhttt...oh well. Malfoy, help me drag Harry to the library," Ron said as he grabbed Harry under the arms and tried to pull him down the hall.

Draco snorted, "Cha, right. I just washed my hands."

With that, Draco turned on his heel and went to leave. But an oddly placed puddle of water caused him to slip. Draco cried. Filch rounded the corner with a mop.

"Stupid ruddy kids! Messy messy messy!" A vein bulged in his temple as he shook his finger in Draco's face before he smacked him with the mop and left. Draco cried some more.

Malfoy then got up and ran like a little girl to the library. "Well, that helped a lot," Ron said as he tried to pull Harry. "Damn! What did Harry eat today?"

Hermione slapped Ron, grabbed Harry's wrist, and easily dragged him down the hall.

"Wimp" she grumbled.

Ginny just shrugged and followed Hermione down the hall.

When they arrived at the library, everyone else was already there. Fred and George were dressed like the men in black, and were standing in a vacant corner as they glared at everyone suspiciously.

Situated on one side of the library was a bar, where Dumbledore sat, calmly sipping sherry. His costume consisted of a crushed blue-velvet suit, a frilly lace cravat, Italian boots, and thick black glasses, as well as a set of teeth that were old, yellow, and crooked.

"Dude, booze," Ron commented. At this, Harry awoke and sat up.

"Booze? Where?" Harry said, looking around, before his eyes landed on the bar, and he got a manic glint in his eye. "Must…have….alcohol…."

He began crawling towards the bar, but he had only made it a few feet before Hermione stood in front of him, blocking his path. "Hermione, I'm gonna have to ask you to step aside. You're standing in the way of me, and, well, alcohol….ugh….."

Hermione looked at him in disgust. "Harry Alabastard Potter (A/N: I know that's not his middle name but in this fic, it is just cuz I like it J )!! You are 16 years old. You should know better than that!!"

At this she turned on her heel, strolled over to the bar and poured herself a martini. "Ladies first," she said simply, while sipping at her martini.

"Gor blimey! Hermione! I had no idea....will you be a doll and pass us the rum please?" Harry said giving her his most charming smile. Which, for the record, isn't that charming.

"Ahem ahem."

All heads turned to look at Dumbledore. "I just think that it's just groovy that all you cats came to my party! Yeah baby!"

"Dear god, man! Please lay off the Austin Powers imitations! You suck at them!" Hermione fell to her knees and pleaded.

"Oh fine! Burst my bubble then! Butthead!!!!!! Anyways, if there are no more interruptions," Dumbledore glared pointedly at Hermione. "I will continue. I will now be assigning your partners and the cards you will get will have your partner's name and your first location to search for clues." He then did this funky dance as he passed out the cards.

"Now we will begin the game."

Lightning flashed to reveal Dumbledore's manic expression.

"Whoop Dee Doo! But what does it all mean, man?" Harry said with slurred words and rum on his breath as he swung the bottle above his head.

"I think we're supposed to find all the fuschia bun-hippos so's we can get all the mashed peas….mm, peas," Ron said with a happy grin on his face.

He then threw his arm around Harry and gave him a very serious look. "You know, I always thought you were real purdy. Will you marry me, Harry? I wanna have your children."

This slightly sobered Harry up, and he slowly turned his head to look at Ron. One eyebrow was cocked, in a quizzical expression, and he slurred "'Scuse me?"

"Please Harry? It's my dream." He then grabbed Harry's hand and waist, and began doing a waltz, attempting to sing the Cinderella song So This is Love?

Harry freed himself from Ron's grasp and punched him in his good eye, so that he stumbled backward, into Hermione. She, in turn, got up and pulled Ron to his feet.

"Ron, I think you've had enough to drink. Give me the bottle." She wrestled the bottle of rum out of his grasp and began chugging it.

"Hey you stupid evil bitch whore!! That's mine!!" Ron shouted at her. Hermione simply looked at him, and punched him in his eye. He cried. Again.

A/N: I am so happy that I got good reviews for the first chapter! So I would like to take a moment to thank you all. Ahem....thank you all! Ok...well that wasn't so bad. smiles I love you all! And I would like to mention you:

Senya Starseeker: I get no greater pleasure than making someone laugh. :) Thank you so much!

Mystic-angle: Why thank you! You flatter me! I bow to you.... bows

GracieBaby: I would love to have a beta reader...actually I don't know what one is...but if you would like to be mine...I would love you to :)

Kotoko: A craftsman always likes to hear that her work is appreciated...I love you!

Thanks again! Keep it coming you genius critics! Review....AWAY!!!!! grabs rope and swings away