A/N: Hello all....thanks for your reviews. And my co-author didn't bail on me after all. Hey Ale! waves and sadly...this fic is coming to an end...but we'll try to write a new one for you.

ale: yeah, winky over here lied to you…I didn't bail, just slacked off….sorry it's taken so long to update but uh…we've been slack basically…I'd try to blame it on school but uh, it's the summer so that excuse is completely shot. The best I can come up with is that winky was out of town for a while and so she couldn't sign online, where we do all our writing soo…we're really sorry!! Don't hate us, and we hope you like this chapter…we don't know if it's as good as the others, neither of us really had the 'funny' when writing this so…we hope it's up to your standard of liking!! Love ya!

Chapter 12: Infected Paper Cuts of Doom

"Well," Harry said looking around from one person to the next, "what the hell are we supposed to do now? Draco is dead....Ghosty Draco is usless..."

"Hey!" Ghosty Draco replied.

"Fred and George are missing," Harry said leaning against the wall and letting himself slide to the floor. "We are totally screwed, aren't we?"

The doors suddenly flew open. "No you're not. Not yet." Seamus wheezed as he seased his running. "Hold on." He propped himself up against a table and breathed really deeply for like 2 minutes. Everyone looked impatiently at him.

"Remember," Seamus said, "the biggest fish in the river...gets that way, by never being caught." He looked real happy with his hint.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Ron said.

"It's a riddle bitch!" Seamus said slapping him. Ron cried. Suddenly, Fred and George followed by like 20 swat looking guys came flying in the door.

"There he is!!" Fred screamed.

"Let's get him!" said george.

"Oh shit," said Seamus.

"Banana?" inquired Ron.

"No, Ron, fish, it's all about the fish," Seamus replied, while pulling a unicycle out of his bookbag and leaning it against the wall. He then pulled out a chainsaw, a blender, and an orange, and mounted the unicycle. He proceeded to ride down the hall, juggling the chainsaw, blender and orange, and shouted back "See ya, suckers!!" at the swat team chasing him. But at that very moment, a crash was heard as a window broke and through it came a thousand strips of paper, which brutally sliced and eventually killed Seamus.

Everyone simply stood back and watched, through it all, until Seamus was no longer breathing.

"Poor Seamus," Hermione said shaking her head, "Instantanious paper cut infections is a horrible way to go. Horrible." Ginny agreed.

Harry looked over at ghost draco. "You gonna help at all?"

Ghosty Draco looked back at Harry. "Let me think about that for a moment." He stroked his chin for about 2 seconds. "No." Harry stared at him. "I'm just kidding," said Ghosty. "Umm...maybe by fish he meant murderer?" he shrugged and vanished.

"Well that blowed." Ron said. "But it will have to do."

Harry and Ron pondered for a moment before deciding to look around Seamus paper cut infected body for more clues.

"Man," Ron said, "Seamus smells like ass."

"Hey," Harry replied, "be cool. It's all good."

"Yeah," Hermione said walking over. "Have some respect for the dead, heffer."

Hermione looked through his backpack, and found some silly string, a shoe, a traffic cone, and some pineapple.

"Silly String, a shoe, a traffic cone, and some pineapple? Does he red really fucking think orange that this bloody yellow shit will blue help us green find the indigo damned purple killer???"

"Wow," Ron leaned over and muttered to Harry, "I never knew Hermione had such a colorful vocabulary….get it? Get it?"

Harry punched Ron. And he cried.

Ron dragged himself across the floor to prop himself against the wall and tend to his now swollen jaw. He pulled out his compact and observed that after the many beatings he had recently received, he now looked like a Picasso painting. "Damn them, damn them all…"

As he put away his compact in his magenta pocketbook, he noticed something small lying on the floor across the hall. Something blue, and shaped oddly like a….pawprint…

"A clue, a clue!!!" Ron exclaimed, pointing at the object and directing everyones attention to it.

Hermione, Harry, and whoever else happened to be there because the author can no longer remember who is where, strode over to where the object was and gazed down at it.

"Damn it, Ron," Harry said, "It's not a clue, it's just a dead moose."

"Oh," said Ron, "yeah, sorry, I make that mistake a lot."

"Ugh!" shouted Sirius. "What are we going to do? If we don't find the killer soon, everyone but the main characters, aka Harry, Ron and Hermione will be killed off in cliché and gory Hollywood-like fashion!! We have to do something!"

After his tirade, he leaned against the wall, breathing heavily, and somehow dissapeared.

"Mother of Pearl!!" shouted Remus. "Where did he go??"

Ron went to where Sirius had previously been standing. He tapped the wall. "Hey look. A randomly convenient hiding place behind this random loose block in the wall that we never would have thought to look before." Ron pulled the random loose block from the wall and tossed it over his shoulder. It hit Harry in the face. Harry cried. Ron reached into the compartment and pulled out a little satin bag. It was a light pink and embroidered (is that a word?) with little red flowers.

"Oh isn't it just darling?" Ron said. He stuck it in his pocket and walked off.

"Come back here bitch!" Ginny said chasing after Ron. "Lemme see inside the bag!" She tackled him and got the bag out of his pocket.

"It is truly darling, though" she said to the crying Ron on the floor. Everyone gathered around her to look in the bag. When she undid the clasp and began to open it the lights went out. Someone let out a blood curdling scream.

"Hermione, I know you're scared, but there's nothing to worry about," Harry said patting her on the shoulder.

"Hey!" Hermione said swatting his hand away. "That was Ron!"

"Well," Ron said, "It's dark. I can't help it."

"Lumos," muttered Remus, allowing some light to appear in the dark hall, and Harry proceeded to open the small bag the rest of the way.

He reached inside the bag and out came…..a tiny stuffed bunny.

"Aw, how cute," Hermione cooed, taking the bunny from Harry's hands and holding it up to her face. It bit her on the nose, and she cried.

"Maybe this bunny is supposed to tell us something," Remus suggested taking the bunny from Hermione. He examined the bunny only to find a small blue pawprint on the side of it?

"This....is our last clue?" Ron was really confused...and stoned.

"Yeah," George said. "Looks like it."

"Umm...does it do anything?" Fred asked. Remus flipped the bunny over and found a cord. He pulled it and it played a song.

"Dude...this song sucks." George whined.

"Oh really?" said the singing bunny. "Well why don't you take this song and shove it right up your ass?"

"What did you say to me?" George said getting in the bunny's face.

"What? You and that Ronald McDonald haircut want a piece of me? Bring it on bitch! Bring it on! i'll fuck you up!"

"Ugh!" Harry said throwing his arms in the air. "This clue sucks ass." He put his hand against the wall to lean on it. The block his hand pushed on receeded into the wall and the wall spun around leaving Harriett....I mean Harry...trapped on the other side.