Spike froze for that moment, he closed his eyes
and thought about how he could have handled the situation with Buffy
differently. He then realized someone was screaming at him.
"What the
hell? That was an expensive glass! You better pay for that," the bartender
shouted across the room.
Spike just ignored him and walked out of the
bar, jumping on his motorcycle and revving it up. Spike tried to remember which
hotel Buffy was staying it, and it dawned on him that she might not even be
there, considering every time he and Angel went she wasn't there earlier.
He decided to give it a go anyways and try to find her, or try and
follow her scent anyways. 'Sometimes I feel like a bloody hound dog,' he thought
to himself.
Buffy sat in her hotel room on the couch, looking at an old
photo from her high school days. The picture of Xander, Willow, Buffy, Cordelia,
and Oz stood on the table. Buffy's frown grew even more glum then usual. She
truly missed the old days.
Suddenly images ran through her mind like a
short film. Fighting side by side with Angel, Xander, Willow, Oz.. He eyes grew
heavy, a few tears fell down her cheeks once more. The images began to play
again, she remembered they were up against Inca, the mummy girl.
Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Buffy still sat on her couch
reminiscing that moment, then she stood up and began walking toward the door.
Spike stood at the other end, with his hands on his hips packing back
and forth. Trying to figure out what to say. "Buffy, I love you..," he ran that
through his head, "No...," he said out loud, "Buffy, please don't go," he
thought about that, "No..sounds too desperate..," he said aloud.
Buffy
opened the door surprised to see Spike there, her expression said it for her.
"Spike..," she began, "What are you doing here?"
"Buffy.. Look.
I'm sorry about what I said back at Wolfram and Hart. (He sighed) I couldn't
bare the thought of losing you again. It would kill me," he looked down, ashamed
of the way he acted back at Wolfram and Hart.
"Come in Spike," she
allowed him in.
Spike walked into the room then crashed on her couch
letting out an exhausted sigh.
Buffy sat next to him and tried to think
about how she should react to all this. She then thought about Angel. Was he
truly happy with his girlfriend? Do I still have feelings for him, or am I just
jealous cause I'm not in a relationship? She thought to herself.
"Spike,
I'm coming back to California. I'll stay with you and Angel for a while, and so
will the slayers in training," she half-smiled, "Maybe you and Angel can help
them with their training.." she then remembered how she had tried training them
on how to kill a vampire using Spike as the demonstration.
Her thoughts
trailed back to that.
"Ouch..," he groaned.
"Oh, I'm sorry.. Did
that hurt?," she opened his shirt and touched the wound gently, showing complete
compassion for the blonde vampire.
"Wow, that's.. really hot," one of
the slayers in training joked. The others giggled.
Buffy then snapped
out of it.
"Or maybe not..," she laughed a little.
Spike got
closer to her and put his hands over hers. He was so cold.
Buffy felt
her heart pitter patter from feeling his hands on hers. Quickly she removed
them.
"On second thought, it might be a good idea if I stay with the
girls at a hotel close to Wolfram and Hart," she kept a straight face.
"Did I do something wrong?," Spike asked curiously.
"No Spike..
It's just.. (she looked down for a moment) it's been a really long time since
.."
"Since we've been close.. Since I've held you in my arms and never
wanted to let go," his eyes grew sad, but were still filled with some hope.
"Why won't you let me love you?," Spike asked her that moment. He gulped
a little, realizing he took a risk by making that statement.
"It's not
that Spike.. I'm.. I'm afraid.," she had a certain look in her eyes. Fear was
the main emotion she possessed at the moment. "I'm afraid that I can't love you.
Because I bring death to everyone who I love. That's why I can't love you
Spike."
Spike sighed, "If it helps any, you and I both know I'm already
dead. Well, undead anyways," he smiled.
She still hung her head low,
trying to think.
Spike put his arm around her and brought her to him.
She silently wept against his chest. "I miss being part of "the scooby gang" so
badly. I miss everyone. Giles, Willow, Xander.. I'm so miserable without them.
So lonely. And now you're back and everything is confusing and...," she looked
up at him, "I don't know how I feel about you."
Spike felt part of him
die inside from hearing her say those words. He stood up and paced in place for
a moment, "Do you want me to help you pack up your things so we can head to
LA?," he asked her.
"Alright. I'll get everyone together and we can
leave in the morning–"
Spike scowled.
"Oops, I mean, tomorrow
night.," she corrected herself.
For that moment there was silence
between them. Neither of them knew what to say or how to react to that moment,
but just stay in silence.
