Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to Joan of Arcadia. The concept, characters and show are all property of Barbara Hall and CBS. Bless her heart for creating such a great show! The music from Songs About Jane is the property of Maroon 5, as are the titles of those songs. I wrote the drabbles around these titles. Please don't sue me. ;)
--------------------------------------
Author's Notes: The Songs About Jane challenge was, by far, the most enjoyable of all the challenges. I turn into a puddle of goo when it comes to this band's music and have yet to grow tired of this cd even after having listened to it continuously for more than five months. Don't know what it is, but their music is catchy as hell.
Oh, and it doesn't hurt that the band leader's name is Adam or that he just happened to write songs about Jane. It's no coincidence, I tell you.
Many of these drabbles could be grouped together into a series of sorts but I'll leave it to you guys to figure out which ones go together.
Wish someone would write songs about me,
Everwood2003
---------------------------------------
Songs About Jane
Title: Harder to Breathe
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
He tells himself that he shouldn't feel disappointed by her actions, that he really never knew her well enough to care so much.
He reminds himself that believing in her has been one of his greatest mistakes, that he should have remained clueless to everything around him.
He insists that it's for the best because she would have eventually broken his heart anyway.
He convinces himself that she deserves every harsh word, every cold look, and that no amount of pleading on her part is going to make him forgive her.
So why is it, Adam wonders, so hard to breathe whenever she's around?
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
As he stands outside, hands in pocket and hood drawn over his head like a protective covering, he feels anger and disappointment burning in his chest.
He kicks at the grass beneath him and swears that this is the last time, that she's lost all her chances and that he'll find a way to move on, even if it kills him.
But then she's there, soft hair framing her beautiful face, and he figures that he's a masochist of some sort because he knows he loves her even as she's hurting him yet again.
Despite her rejection, Adam just can't bring himself to say no when she asks him to dance.
Title: Shiver
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
After the wedding, Joan sits in silence on the edge of the bed while Adam sits beside her, his fingers laced through hers.
"You know, we don't have to do this tonight. If it's too---"
She tugs at his hand and shakes her head, a gentle smile on her lips and he thinks that maybe he's more nervous than he'd like to admit.
He watches, mesmerized by the sight of her as she lets her hair cascade onto her shoulders.
He's scared by the intensity of his emotions but more so by his desire to get under her skin the way she has his.
Title: She Will Be Loved
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
He finds himself at her doorstep, despite the pouring rain and the fact that he has not idea what he's going to say when she answers the door.
But it doesn't really matter because everything comes out the wrong way and, when it comes to Jane, everything's always complicated anyway.
He feels like kissing her, but decides on something just as intimate and he wonders why he tried to move on at all.
By the time Adam leaves, he's just as confused as before except now it's raining just a bit harder.
And his goodbye means nothing.
Title: Tangled
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
It bothers him, the way that she tries so hard to act as if his being with Iris doesn't bother her in the least.
Especially since he knows her too well to let her fool him into believing it.
He feels like an asshole because, truth be told, he grips Iris' hands just a little more firmly and smiles at her with more enthusiasm whenever Jane's around.
He knows that it has an affect on her, has seen her laughter die down whenever he does those things but it only leaves him feeling empty and ashamed.
Title: The Sun
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
In the end, the very thing he loved about her, her compassion and will to put other's people's happiness before her own, had made her stubborn even when she couldn't bring herself to say goodbye without sobbing into his shoulder
He'd protested, urging her to rethink her decision because their love was strong enough to overcome distance and time apart.
She'd refused, insisting that he shouldn't pass up a good opportunity because of her, them.
Even now that it hurts to think about her, about the love he still has for her, Adam has no regrets about having been with his Jane.
Title: Must Get Out
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
Lately, Adam finds it difficult to think of Jane without wanting to catch the earliest flight to Arcadia.
He'd almost done it once, had booked a flight at 2 a.m. in the morning, had his bags packed and ready to go. But he felt he owed it to her to at least give his future, the one she'd sacrificed their relationship for, a try.
Jane might have commented that he was stir-crazy if she'd been there to see how he woke up at dawn each and every morning, thoughts of getting out of the crazy city and back to the comfort of her arms practically driving him insane.
Title: Sunday Morning
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
For all that Adam kept himself from going back to her, she was the one who could not stay away.
He did not question Jane's presence at his doorstep, had wordlessly accepted her embrace, had reveled in the familiar scent of peaches in her hair.
He'd welcomed her gentle kisses on his lips even as she asked for forgiveness, felt a wave of déja vu as she insisted that she'd never meant to hurt him, had never stopped loving him.
She cried herself to sleep in his arms and as the sun dawned the next day, he couldn't help but marvel at how right it felt to wake up next to her on a Sunday morning.
Title: Secret
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
Adam draws Jane while she sleeps, his hand working furiously on the final touches by the time she opens her eyes. He watches in silence as she sits up beside him, her smile shy and akward before he notices that she's biting her lip.
The last time he remembers seeing her this way, she couldn't figure out how to tell him that she wanted to end the relationship.
He places his sketchbook on the nightstand beside him and turns to her, gives her a kiss on the forehead as a sign of encouragement.
And waits patiently for her to finally tell him about the secret she's been keeping.
Title: Through With You
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
In a way, he thinks it's sort of a blessing that he never really had a serious relationship with anyone except Jane and Iris.
He still remembers how nervous he'd felt as he tried to explain to Iris why things weren't going to work, why there was no point in trying to deny it anymore.
His words hadn't been necessary, as Iris knew it was inevitable. She'd all but said that she was through with him.
He supposes that it was better for him to bear the brunt of her disappointment. But it still doesn't ease the shame he feels for having used her to get over Jane.
Title: Not Coming Home
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
Iris, Adam reasons, is a nice enough girl. She's not Jane, by any means, doesn't have any of her quirky qualities, but he likes her well enough.
By the time he's made his way down the school's halls, he's decided that he has to give Iris a chance, that he can't keep waiting for Jane when she hasn't given him enough hope that there's something worth waiting for.
He doesn't, however, expect to see Jane waiting just outside the classroom door, her eyes full of---something, longing maybe?
But, as much as it pains him to see disappointment etched on her face, he knows that he's not going back.
Title: Sweetest Goodbye
Word Count: 100
Challenge: Songs About Jane
Adam proposes in his shed, the place where their friendship truly began. He hangs the engagement ring on his latest sculpture and gets her to look for it under the pretense that he wants her to tell him what she thinks of his new creation.
She's silent and, for a moment, he's afraid that everything has been an illusion, that he's still the boy who knew nothing of ripples or yellow boats.
But she wraps her arms around his neck, whispers that she's scared that she'll end up ruining everything. He laughs, because he's saying goodbye to his own uncertainties, his fears and, above all, his loneliness.