((Alrighty. Yet another chapter. And if you people don't review, I swear... I don't know what I'll do, but it won't be pretty! All credit for the script, props, and characters goes to Jim Sharman and Richard O'Brien. All lyrics belong to the wonderful mind of Richard O'Brien as well. I take no credit for any of it, so no sue!
Fushigi Yuugi also does not belong to me, as much as I wish it did. I do not own Trigun or Pet Shop of Horrors.
Audra and Lilly belong to themselves, you can even ask them. Same with Otaku-no-Miko and Wolfdog21. I own myself, Dominic and Neko-ane.
Part I Scene II- The Fangirls Rush In...
The set was finally coming together. An impressive backdrop of the Denton Episcopal Church, an old-fashioned building with the traditional steeple. In the so-called distance a billboard reading "Denton: The Home of Happiness" was painted. "Bushes" on plywood backing had been set up around the stage to give an impression of the scene occurring outside. A plaque next to the church said "Be Just and Fear Not" in gothic lettering.
Rachel looked around with a strained grin. It looked wonderful, but... Something still struck her as being wrong.
Oh, that was right...
Rachel: (To Mitsukake, who had just finished setting up the stairs that led up to the "doors" of the church.) Where's the car?
Mitsukake: Wasn't Chichiri supposed to just, you know... (He makes a movement with his hands expressing a sort of "poof")
Rachel: Well... Yes and no... We need a toy car for him to sort of... Enlarge.
Mitsukake: Eh... I'll go see if Chiriko knows where it is.
Rachel: Alright. Call me over the headset when you find it. I gotta go backstage and check on Nuriko and Hotohori.
The healer nodded and set about his task, leaving the director standing in the center of the stage all by her lonesome.
Rachel: (Shudders and mutters to herself.) There is nothing quite as freaky as an empty stage...
She shook her head, carefully walking between the curtains at stage right to get to the backstage area.
.::8::.
Backstage they were having their own problems. Nuriko and Hotohori were both frantically trying to get the other seishi to sit still long enough for them to apply the stage makeup. This was proving a difficult task, since they were missing a couple of principle characters.
As soon as the director entered the room, she was confronted by a frazzled Nuriko.
Nuriko: (Looks close to tears.) Rachel, we're missing two characters!!
Rachel: What???
Nuriko: Magenta and Columbia! We don't have anyone to play them!
Rachel: ...oh my god... (Wails.) What am I gonna dooooo??
Just then, Otaku poked her head into the room.
Otaku: Hey, Rach? Audra and Lilly are here...
Rachel: (Eyes light up as she gets an idea.) Audra and Lilly?? Really??
She rushed out of the room, grinning broadly.
Nuriko: Why am I worried...?
.::8::.
A medium-height girl with waist-length reddish-brown hair and a shorter girl with short purple-black hair were waiting in the lobby.
The taller one had a blood-red baby-tee on that had the slogan "Watch out- I bite" blazoned across the chest, black flare leg jeans, and black tennis.
The shorter one was wearing a white shirt with "Angel" written across it in sparkly pink lettering, and a white windbreaker. Her jeans were blue, and her shoes were white to match her shirt and jacket. Quite a different look from her slightly demonic sister.
As soon as Rachel entered the lobby she pounced on them, giving the shorter one a noogie and flashing a thumbs up at the taller.
Rachel: Hi, Miaka!
Lilly: (aka The Short One) Don't call me that!
Rachel: Aw, why not? (She grins evilly.) Come backstage and you can meet the real Miaka.
Audra: (aka The Demonic One) I'm only interested in seeing Tasuki.
Lilly: Me too! And Chichiri-sama!!
Rachel: Eheheheheheh... I'm sure you'll get to see them... (Under her breath.) Eventually...
Otaku: (Walks in from a door on the opposite side of the room.) Hey, uh, Nuri's wondering where his newest victims- I mean, eh, actors are.
Rachel: Just a minute... (Turns to the sisters, who are both looking at her apprehensively.) Hey, how would you two like to be in the play?
Audra: No. Frickin'. Way.
Lilly: Ditto.
Rachel: (Tries to give them the puppy dog look. Let it be known that this only works for people with brown eyes.) Pwease?
Sisters: No.
Rachel: (Is now begging.) You'll get to see the guys back there! You'll even get to work with them!
Audra: Enticing...
Lilly: (Drool.)
Audra: (Glances at sister and rolls eyes.) You are such a wench... Alright, alright. What parts?
Rachel: (Inner sigh of relief.) Magenta and Columbia.
Audra: I'll take Magenta. She's awesome!
Lilly: Who's Columbia?
Rachel: A glorified groupie.
Lilly: Well... Does she get to be Chichiri's groupie?
Rachel: Eh... no... But she is Tasuki's groupie. And Nuri's.
Lilly: Okay! (Grins and flashes a peace sign.)
Rachel: (Grabs their arms and drags them backstage.) You do know the songs and stuff, right...?
.::8::.
Nuriko looked up as the door opened again. He had shooed everyone but Hotohori out of the room, and then sunk into a chair and stared forlorny at his makeup kit.
Nuriko: Who are they?
Rachel: (Gestures to the two girls beside her.) Nuriko, meet Magenta and Columbia.
Nuriko: (Face lights up.) Really?
Audra: Yup.
Lilly: Nu-ri-ko!! (Grins ecstatically, then her grin fades.) Where're Chichiri and Tasuki?
Nuriko: They're around somewhere...
At that, Lilly attempted to run out the door, but was stopped by the director grabbing her arm.
Rachel: Uh-uh. You can go bishie-hunting after you're in your costumes.
Lilly: Aww...
Audra: (Rolls her eyes and sits in the chair Nuriko had recently occupied.) Well?
Nuriko: Right.
Hotohori: (Wakes up from a doze.) What?
Nuriko: (Eyes get all sparkly.) We have two new people to get into costume before we change!
Hotohori: We shall have to hurry, there is not much time.
.::8::.
Rachel was smiling to herself as she walked back on stage, where she was planning on waiting until Mitsukake called her over the headset. She was about to receive her second surprise in thirty minutes.
A pair of hands covered her eyes.
?: (In a sibilant, slightly gravelly voice.) The master is pleased you could come...
Rachel: Hey! Lemme go!
?: Not until you guess who I am...
Rachel: (She taps her foot in mock agitation.) Houjun Ri, let me go this instant!
Chichiri: (Lets go.) Fine no da!
Rachel: (Grins, then turns around.) Gah!
Chichiri: (Smirks.) I take it Nuriko did a good job on the makeup?
Rachel: Good? Chiri, Richard O'Brien would be jealous.
Just then, her headset crackled to life.
Mitsukake: (over headset) I've found the car. Have you found the mage?
Rachel: (into mic) Yeah. Or rather, he found me. You won't believe the number Nuri did on him!
Mitsukake: That bad?
Rachel: Heh. I wish. Just wait until you see it. Get your butt over here, will ya?
Mitsukake: (from the left) Way ahead of you.
The healer walked onto the stage, something small and white in one hand. Chichiri, who had had one eyebrow raised since the makeup comment, broke into a grin. The object in Mitsukake's hand was a small toy car, words painted almost to small to see all over it.
Chichiri: I take it you found Chiriko na no da?
Rachel: (looks shocked) How the hell did you know about that? Wait, I don't want to know. (to Mitsukake) Set it in the middle of the stage, will ya?
Mitsukake: (does as she asks)
A red glow surrounds the small car, and it begins to grow, reaching life-size in a matter of moments. The words "Just Married" and "She Got Hers Now He'll Get His" are now clearly legible from the back of the theater.
Rachel: (grins and claps) Alright! Is everything ready for the opening?
Mitsukake: I think so... Curtain is in... ten minutes.
Rachel: (flatly) And no one has shown up yet.
Chichiri: I'm sure they'll start flooding in soon no da!
Rachel: (mock-glares) Optimist. Alright, Mits, could you go and check on Vash and Dominic?
Mitsukake: (nods and melts back into the shadows)
Rachel: (wide eyes) No one that tall should be able to do that. (turns to "Riff Raff") You may want to go check on Magenta and Columbia in the makeup room. Maybe rehearse a little?
Chichiri: Alright. And stop worrying, will you? You're giving me blue hairs!
Rachel: (raises eyebrow) ...Right. Oh, and watch out for Lilly. She's a fangirl. Eh... you might want to watch out for Audra, too. She bites.
Chichiri: Will do. (walks offstage)
Rachel: (looks out at rows and rows of empty seats) ...Shit.
.::8::.
Otaku-no-Miko was once again sitting in the ticket booth, reading Demon Diary and enjoying the freedom of a lack of braces thoroughly. In other words, she was chewing about three pieces of gum.
Out of the shadows a form approached unheeded. It walked up to the ticket booth and stood there, staring at the blonde ineffectively for a while. Finally, tired of being ignored, it coughed politely.
?: Um... Yo? This is where the play is tonight, right?
Otaku: No, this is where the snorklewear show is. How may I help you? (finally looks up) Oh! Hi, Wolfdog! What's up?
Wolfdog, a thirteen-year-old girl with shoulder-length black hair, looked nonplussed. She shoved her hands into dark green hoodie.
Wolfdog: Feh. Looks like this is the place. (looks around) Not many people here.
Otaku: Nope. You're the first.
Wolfdog: (hands over some cash) Ticket, please.
Otaku: (hands her a ticket) Enjoy the show. Oh, and feel free to glomp any bishies you run into in there.
Wolfdog: (grins) Like I needed permission?
.::8::.
Audra: Okay, first off, any romantic nonsense that occurs on stage means nothing, got it?
Chichiri: Da...
Lilly: (latches onto his arm) Don't be so mean to him, Rekka!
Chichiri: (sweatdrop) Da...
Audra: What? I said what I meant!
Lilly: (eyes go all teary and big) You're so mean!
Chichiri: Da... (thinks to himself:) Rachel is going to pay for this...
Nuriko: (watches from the sidelines, snickering)
Hotohori: (keeps shooting the captive mage sympathetic looks)(whispering to Nuriko) I think we should help him.
Nuriko: Why? He's a big boy. He can take care of himself.
Hotohori: He's too nice to push her off.
Nuriko: That's his problem.
Chichiri: (manages to detach Lilly without seeming rude) Da... I was just supposed to rehearse some lines with you two na no da. Eh... Do you both have the songs memorized?
Audra: Unfortunately.
Lilly: (nods happily) Sure do!
Chichiri: (relieved sigh) Thank the gods - er - Good. Lines?
Audra: We don't have any until the "happy couple" get to Frank N. Furter's mansion. I can rehearse then.
Chichiri: (nods) I have to go and... er... check up on something... (dodges Lilly as he beats a hasty retreat)
Lilly: (snaps fingers) Darn it!
Audra: (rolls eyes)
.::8::.
Otaku's eyes widened as she looked from one end of the street to the other. There were mobs at both ends.
Otaku: Ulp. I hope they're all here for tickets...
It turned out they were. She was swamped by people standing in a restless queue.
.::8::.
The lights dimmed and the crowd hushed. It was one of those rare perfect moments of absolute stillness.
Then a spotlight flicked onto the curtains, and a figure shuffled onto the stage.
At first there is a breathless moment, then a chorus of whistles and catcalls as the fangirls in the audience finally recognized the cast member through all the makeup.
Eventually they settled down, and the music cut in, the soft guitar hushing the last few murmurers in the audience.
Riff Raff: (begins to sing)
Micheal Rennie was ill the day the earth stood still,
but he told us where we stand.
And Falsh Gordon was there in silver underwear,
Claud Rains was the invisible man.
Then something went wrong for Fay Wray and KingKong.
They got caught in a celluloid jam.
Then at a deadly pace,
it came from outer-space,
and this how the message ran:
Science fiction
double feature
Dr. X he'll build a creature.
See androids fighting
Brad and Janet
and Francis stars in:
Forbidden Planet.
At the late night, double feature picture show.
(There is a single whoop from the audience, which is shushed by a barrage of crumpled up programs.)
I know Leo G. Carrol was over a barrel
When Tarantula took to the hills.
And I really got hot when I saw Jenette Scott
Fight a triffid that spits poison and kills.
Dana Andrews said prunes gave him the runes
And passing them used lots of skills
But when worlds collide,
Said George Pal to his bride,
I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills like a:
Science fiction
Double feature
Dr. X he'll build a creature.
See androids fighting
Brad and Janet
And Francis stars in:
Forbidden Planet.
At the late night, double feature picture show.
I wanna go to the late night double feature picture show,
By RKO!
To the late night double feature picture show,
in the back row!
(The curtains begin to slide open and he slowly backs offstage.)
To the late night, double feature picture show.
Rachel grinned and gave Chichiri a highfive before going back to tensly watching the stage.
Onstage, the "doors" to the church cut-out were flung back with a convincing sound-effect courtesy of Vash the Stampede. Ralph and Betty Hapshatt (played by two chorus members) came out to cheers from the other actors onstage. A few handfuls of rice were thrown.
Ralph shook hands with the minister (aka Frank N. Furter, played by Nuriko) and slipped him a twenty dollar bill.
Rachel: (muttering to herself) Alright... now go over to Tamahome... good...
Chichiri: You really need to stop stressing over this no da.
Rachel: I can't help it. (points at shirt, which says DIRECTOR on it) It comes with the territory. Besides, these things have a way of going wrong...
Chichiri: (sighs and shakes his head) Alright, alright. (pats her on the head before heading backstage to get in place)
Rachel: (pats hair back into place irritably)
(Onstage)
Brad (Tamahome): ...inseparable ever since you sat in on Dr. Scott's refresher lectures.
Ralph: To tell you the truth, Brad, she was the only reason I came in the first place. To tell you the truth, Brad, She was the only reason I came in the first place. Science was never one of my favourite subjects but I'm sure without Dr. Scott I couldn't have made it today.
Brad: Yes, Janet and I are both fond of him. We drove over to see him last vacation. It's a shame his new job took him away from Denton.
(Offstage)
Rachel bit her lip as the door of the church opened again, but the audience didn't appear to notice. She let out a breath she hadn't known she was holding as Riff Raff closed the door without causing so much as an eye in the audience to flicker in his direction.
(Onstage)
Janet (Miaka) caught the bouquet of silk flowers thrown by Betty.
After the Married couple have gotten into the car and "driven" offstage, Brad and Janet linger outside the church. So three of the caretakers, an old man with a pitchfork and his "wife" and "daughter". They stand so that they resemble the "American Gothic" painting.
The "daughter" (Columbia) walks offstage, while the "father" (Riff Raff) and "mother" (Magenta) stay by the doors of the church.
Janet: (still holding bouquet) Oh Brad, wasn't it wonderful. Didn't Betty look radiantly beautiful. Just an hour ago she was plain old Betty Monroe. (sounds wistful) Now she's Mrs. Brad Hapshatt.
Brad: (still watching after the car) Er... yes, Janet... Ralph's a lucky guy.
Columbia: (Walks back onstage and takes her place next to Riff Raff and Magenta.)
(They start to walk around the stage.)
Janet: Yes.
Brad: Everyone knows Betty's a wonderful little cook.
Janet: (glares and puts her hands on her hips, sticking her tongue out at his back) Yes.
Brad: And Ralph himself will be in line for a promotion in a year or so.
Janet: Yes.
The first chord of the "Wedding Song" reverberated through the theater.
Brad turned to Janet with a determined look on his face.
Brad: Hey, Janet.
Janet: Yes brad.
Brad: I've got something to say.
Janet: (breathy) Uh-huh.
Brad: I really loved the ...skillful way you beat the other girls to the bride's bouquet.
Janet: Oh, Brad.
They turn to each other and begin to sing:
Brad: The river was deep but I swam it!
Chorus: Janet.
(The obvious sneer in the chorus's combined voices (the chorus being Riff Raff, Magenta, and Columbia, causes the audience to snicker.)
Brad: The future is ours so let's plan it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: So please don't tell me to can it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
The road was long but I ran it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: There's a fire in my heart and you fan it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: If there's one fool for you than I am it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
Here's the ring to prove that I'm no joker.
There's three ways that love can grow:
That's good, bad, and midiocre!
Oh, J-A-N-E-T I love you so!
Janet: Oh, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: Now we're engaged and I'm so glad!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: That you met mom and you know dad!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: I've one thing to say, and that's Brad, I'm mad for you too!
Chorus: Oh Brad!
Brad: Oh, dammit.
Janet: I'm mad!
Brad: Oh, Janet!
Janet: For you...
Brad: I love you too-oo-oo-oo.
Together: There's one thing left to do, ah-oo!
Brad: And that's go see the man who began it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: When we met in his science exam, it
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: Made me give you the eye and then panic!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
Brad: Dammit, Janet!
Janet: Oh Brad, I'm mad!
Brad: Dammit, Janet!
Together: I love you!
They kissed at the end of the song, amid whoops and cat-calls from the audience.
The curtains slid shut, and the audience clapped.
(Offstage)
It was like ants when their anthill was flooded. There were half a dozen people running around doing things that even the director wasn't sure about.
Rachel: (into headset) Hey, Mits? Is Neko doing her job?
Mistukake: Yeah.
Rachel: (breaths a sigh of relief) Thank the gods. How long do you think the set change will take?
Mitsukake: Three minutes at most.
Rachel: Right.
There was a crash onstage.
Mitsukake: Make that six...
((Alrighty! REVIEW, people! Otherwise I will give you to Frank! Mwahahahaaaaa!
I'm still welcoming cameos!
To the two of you peoples that reviewed (Otaku-no-miko and Wolfdog21), I give a big cookie. Yes, one. You two can fight over it.))
Fushigi Yuugi also does not belong to me, as much as I wish it did. I do not own Trigun or Pet Shop of Horrors.
Audra and Lilly belong to themselves, you can even ask them. Same with Otaku-no-Miko and Wolfdog21. I own myself, Dominic and Neko-ane.
Part I Scene II- The Fangirls Rush In...
The set was finally coming together. An impressive backdrop of the Denton Episcopal Church, an old-fashioned building with the traditional steeple. In the so-called distance a billboard reading "Denton: The Home of Happiness" was painted. "Bushes" on plywood backing had been set up around the stage to give an impression of the scene occurring outside. A plaque next to the church said "Be Just and Fear Not" in gothic lettering.
Rachel looked around with a strained grin. It looked wonderful, but... Something still struck her as being wrong.
Oh, that was right...
Rachel: (To Mitsukake, who had just finished setting up the stairs that led up to the "doors" of the church.) Where's the car?
Mitsukake: Wasn't Chichiri supposed to just, you know... (He makes a movement with his hands expressing a sort of "poof")
Rachel: Well... Yes and no... We need a toy car for him to sort of... Enlarge.
Mitsukake: Eh... I'll go see if Chiriko knows where it is.
Rachel: Alright. Call me over the headset when you find it. I gotta go backstage and check on Nuriko and Hotohori.
The healer nodded and set about his task, leaving the director standing in the center of the stage all by her lonesome.
Rachel: (Shudders and mutters to herself.) There is nothing quite as freaky as an empty stage...
She shook her head, carefully walking between the curtains at stage right to get to the backstage area.
.::8::.
Backstage they were having their own problems. Nuriko and Hotohori were both frantically trying to get the other seishi to sit still long enough for them to apply the stage makeup. This was proving a difficult task, since they were missing a couple of principle characters.
As soon as the director entered the room, she was confronted by a frazzled Nuriko.
Nuriko: (Looks close to tears.) Rachel, we're missing two characters!!
Rachel: What???
Nuriko: Magenta and Columbia! We don't have anyone to play them!
Rachel: ...oh my god... (Wails.) What am I gonna dooooo??
Just then, Otaku poked her head into the room.
Otaku: Hey, Rach? Audra and Lilly are here...
Rachel: (Eyes light up as she gets an idea.) Audra and Lilly?? Really??
She rushed out of the room, grinning broadly.
Nuriko: Why am I worried...?
.::8::.
A medium-height girl with waist-length reddish-brown hair and a shorter girl with short purple-black hair were waiting in the lobby.
The taller one had a blood-red baby-tee on that had the slogan "Watch out- I bite" blazoned across the chest, black flare leg jeans, and black tennis.
The shorter one was wearing a white shirt with "Angel" written across it in sparkly pink lettering, and a white windbreaker. Her jeans were blue, and her shoes were white to match her shirt and jacket. Quite a different look from her slightly demonic sister.
As soon as Rachel entered the lobby she pounced on them, giving the shorter one a noogie and flashing a thumbs up at the taller.
Rachel: Hi, Miaka!
Lilly: (aka The Short One) Don't call me that!
Rachel: Aw, why not? (She grins evilly.) Come backstage and you can meet the real Miaka.
Audra: (aka The Demonic One) I'm only interested in seeing Tasuki.
Lilly: Me too! And Chichiri-sama!!
Rachel: Eheheheheheh... I'm sure you'll get to see them... (Under her breath.) Eventually...
Otaku: (Walks in from a door on the opposite side of the room.) Hey, uh, Nuri's wondering where his newest victims- I mean, eh, actors are.
Rachel: Just a minute... (Turns to the sisters, who are both looking at her apprehensively.) Hey, how would you two like to be in the play?
Audra: No. Frickin'. Way.
Lilly: Ditto.
Rachel: (Tries to give them the puppy dog look. Let it be known that this only works for people with brown eyes.) Pwease?
Sisters: No.
Rachel: (Is now begging.) You'll get to see the guys back there! You'll even get to work with them!
Audra: Enticing...
Lilly: (Drool.)
Audra: (Glances at sister and rolls eyes.) You are such a wench... Alright, alright. What parts?
Rachel: (Inner sigh of relief.) Magenta and Columbia.
Audra: I'll take Magenta. She's awesome!
Lilly: Who's Columbia?
Rachel: A glorified groupie.
Lilly: Well... Does she get to be Chichiri's groupie?
Rachel: Eh... no... But she is Tasuki's groupie. And Nuri's.
Lilly: Okay! (Grins and flashes a peace sign.)
Rachel: (Grabs their arms and drags them backstage.) You do know the songs and stuff, right...?
.::8::.
Nuriko looked up as the door opened again. He had shooed everyone but Hotohori out of the room, and then sunk into a chair and stared forlorny at his makeup kit.
Nuriko: Who are they?
Rachel: (Gestures to the two girls beside her.) Nuriko, meet Magenta and Columbia.
Nuriko: (Face lights up.) Really?
Audra: Yup.
Lilly: Nu-ri-ko!! (Grins ecstatically, then her grin fades.) Where're Chichiri and Tasuki?
Nuriko: They're around somewhere...
At that, Lilly attempted to run out the door, but was stopped by the director grabbing her arm.
Rachel: Uh-uh. You can go bishie-hunting after you're in your costumes.
Lilly: Aww...
Audra: (Rolls her eyes and sits in the chair Nuriko had recently occupied.) Well?
Nuriko: Right.
Hotohori: (Wakes up from a doze.) What?
Nuriko: (Eyes get all sparkly.) We have two new people to get into costume before we change!
Hotohori: We shall have to hurry, there is not much time.
.::8::.
Rachel was smiling to herself as she walked back on stage, where she was planning on waiting until Mitsukake called her over the headset. She was about to receive her second surprise in thirty minutes.
A pair of hands covered her eyes.
?: (In a sibilant, slightly gravelly voice.) The master is pleased you could come...
Rachel: Hey! Lemme go!
?: Not until you guess who I am...
Rachel: (She taps her foot in mock agitation.) Houjun Ri, let me go this instant!
Chichiri: (Lets go.) Fine no da!
Rachel: (Grins, then turns around.) Gah!
Chichiri: (Smirks.) I take it Nuriko did a good job on the makeup?
Rachel: Good? Chiri, Richard O'Brien would be jealous.
Just then, her headset crackled to life.
Mitsukake: (over headset) I've found the car. Have you found the mage?
Rachel: (into mic) Yeah. Or rather, he found me. You won't believe the number Nuri did on him!
Mitsukake: That bad?
Rachel: Heh. I wish. Just wait until you see it. Get your butt over here, will ya?
Mitsukake: (from the left) Way ahead of you.
The healer walked onto the stage, something small and white in one hand. Chichiri, who had had one eyebrow raised since the makeup comment, broke into a grin. The object in Mitsukake's hand was a small toy car, words painted almost to small to see all over it.
Chichiri: I take it you found Chiriko na no da?
Rachel: (looks shocked) How the hell did you know about that? Wait, I don't want to know. (to Mitsukake) Set it in the middle of the stage, will ya?
Mitsukake: (does as she asks)
A red glow surrounds the small car, and it begins to grow, reaching life-size in a matter of moments. The words "Just Married" and "She Got Hers Now He'll Get His" are now clearly legible from the back of the theater.
Rachel: (grins and claps) Alright! Is everything ready for the opening?
Mitsukake: I think so... Curtain is in... ten minutes.
Rachel: (flatly) And no one has shown up yet.
Chichiri: I'm sure they'll start flooding in soon no da!
Rachel: (mock-glares) Optimist. Alright, Mits, could you go and check on Vash and Dominic?
Mitsukake: (nods and melts back into the shadows)
Rachel: (wide eyes) No one that tall should be able to do that. (turns to "Riff Raff") You may want to go check on Magenta and Columbia in the makeup room. Maybe rehearse a little?
Chichiri: Alright. And stop worrying, will you? You're giving me blue hairs!
Rachel: (raises eyebrow) ...Right. Oh, and watch out for Lilly. She's a fangirl. Eh... you might want to watch out for Audra, too. She bites.
Chichiri: Will do. (walks offstage)
Rachel: (looks out at rows and rows of empty seats) ...Shit.
.::8::.
Otaku-no-Miko was once again sitting in the ticket booth, reading Demon Diary and enjoying the freedom of a lack of braces thoroughly. In other words, she was chewing about three pieces of gum.
Out of the shadows a form approached unheeded. It walked up to the ticket booth and stood there, staring at the blonde ineffectively for a while. Finally, tired of being ignored, it coughed politely.
?: Um... Yo? This is where the play is tonight, right?
Otaku: No, this is where the snorklewear show is. How may I help you? (finally looks up) Oh! Hi, Wolfdog! What's up?
Wolfdog, a thirteen-year-old girl with shoulder-length black hair, looked nonplussed. She shoved her hands into dark green hoodie.
Wolfdog: Feh. Looks like this is the place. (looks around) Not many people here.
Otaku: Nope. You're the first.
Wolfdog: (hands over some cash) Ticket, please.
Otaku: (hands her a ticket) Enjoy the show. Oh, and feel free to glomp any bishies you run into in there.
Wolfdog: (grins) Like I needed permission?
.::8::.
Audra: Okay, first off, any romantic nonsense that occurs on stage means nothing, got it?
Chichiri: Da...
Lilly: (latches onto his arm) Don't be so mean to him, Rekka!
Chichiri: (sweatdrop) Da...
Audra: What? I said what I meant!
Lilly: (eyes go all teary and big) You're so mean!
Chichiri: Da... (thinks to himself:) Rachel is going to pay for this...
Nuriko: (watches from the sidelines, snickering)
Hotohori: (keeps shooting the captive mage sympathetic looks)(whispering to Nuriko) I think we should help him.
Nuriko: Why? He's a big boy. He can take care of himself.
Hotohori: He's too nice to push her off.
Nuriko: That's his problem.
Chichiri: (manages to detach Lilly without seeming rude) Da... I was just supposed to rehearse some lines with you two na no da. Eh... Do you both have the songs memorized?
Audra: Unfortunately.
Lilly: (nods happily) Sure do!
Chichiri: (relieved sigh) Thank the gods - er - Good. Lines?
Audra: We don't have any until the "happy couple" get to Frank N. Furter's mansion. I can rehearse then.
Chichiri: (nods) I have to go and... er... check up on something... (dodges Lilly as he beats a hasty retreat)
Lilly: (snaps fingers) Darn it!
Audra: (rolls eyes)
.::8::.
Otaku's eyes widened as she looked from one end of the street to the other. There were mobs at both ends.
Otaku: Ulp. I hope they're all here for tickets...
It turned out they were. She was swamped by people standing in a restless queue.
.::8::.
The lights dimmed and the crowd hushed. It was one of those rare perfect moments of absolute stillness.
Then a spotlight flicked onto the curtains, and a figure shuffled onto the stage.
At first there is a breathless moment, then a chorus of whistles and catcalls as the fangirls in the audience finally recognized the cast member through all the makeup.
Eventually they settled down, and the music cut in, the soft guitar hushing the last few murmurers in the audience.
Riff Raff: (begins to sing)
Micheal Rennie was ill the day the earth stood still,
but he told us where we stand.
And Falsh Gordon was there in silver underwear,
Claud Rains was the invisible man.
Then something went wrong for Fay Wray and KingKong.
They got caught in a celluloid jam.
Then at a deadly pace,
it came from outer-space,
and this how the message ran:
Science fiction
double feature
Dr. X he'll build a creature.
See androids fighting
Brad and Janet
and Francis stars in:
Forbidden Planet.
At the late night, double feature picture show.
(There is a single whoop from the audience, which is shushed by a barrage of crumpled up programs.)
I know Leo G. Carrol was over a barrel
When Tarantula took to the hills.
And I really got hot when I saw Jenette Scott
Fight a triffid that spits poison and kills.
Dana Andrews said prunes gave him the runes
And passing them used lots of skills
But when worlds collide,
Said George Pal to his bride,
I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills like a:
Science fiction
Double feature
Dr. X he'll build a creature.
See androids fighting
Brad and Janet
And Francis stars in:
Forbidden Planet.
At the late night, double feature picture show.
I wanna go to the late night double feature picture show,
By RKO!
To the late night double feature picture show,
in the back row!
(The curtains begin to slide open and he slowly backs offstage.)
To the late night, double feature picture show.
Rachel grinned and gave Chichiri a highfive before going back to tensly watching the stage.
Onstage, the "doors" to the church cut-out were flung back with a convincing sound-effect courtesy of Vash the Stampede. Ralph and Betty Hapshatt (played by two chorus members) came out to cheers from the other actors onstage. A few handfuls of rice were thrown.
Ralph shook hands with the minister (aka Frank N. Furter, played by Nuriko) and slipped him a twenty dollar bill.
Rachel: (muttering to herself) Alright... now go over to Tamahome... good...
Chichiri: You really need to stop stressing over this no da.
Rachel: I can't help it. (points at shirt, which says DIRECTOR on it) It comes with the territory. Besides, these things have a way of going wrong...
Chichiri: (sighs and shakes his head) Alright, alright. (pats her on the head before heading backstage to get in place)
Rachel: (pats hair back into place irritably)
(Onstage)
Brad (Tamahome): ...inseparable ever since you sat in on Dr. Scott's refresher lectures.
Ralph: To tell you the truth, Brad, she was the only reason I came in the first place. To tell you the truth, Brad, She was the only reason I came in the first place. Science was never one of my favourite subjects but I'm sure without Dr. Scott I couldn't have made it today.
Brad: Yes, Janet and I are both fond of him. We drove over to see him last vacation. It's a shame his new job took him away from Denton.
(Offstage)
Rachel bit her lip as the door of the church opened again, but the audience didn't appear to notice. She let out a breath she hadn't known she was holding as Riff Raff closed the door without causing so much as an eye in the audience to flicker in his direction.
(Onstage)
Janet (Miaka) caught the bouquet of silk flowers thrown by Betty.
After the Married couple have gotten into the car and "driven" offstage, Brad and Janet linger outside the church. So three of the caretakers, an old man with a pitchfork and his "wife" and "daughter". They stand so that they resemble the "American Gothic" painting.
The "daughter" (Columbia) walks offstage, while the "father" (Riff Raff) and "mother" (Magenta) stay by the doors of the church.
Janet: (still holding bouquet) Oh Brad, wasn't it wonderful. Didn't Betty look radiantly beautiful. Just an hour ago she was plain old Betty Monroe. (sounds wistful) Now she's Mrs. Brad Hapshatt.
Brad: (still watching after the car) Er... yes, Janet... Ralph's a lucky guy.
Columbia: (Walks back onstage and takes her place next to Riff Raff and Magenta.)
(They start to walk around the stage.)
Janet: Yes.
Brad: Everyone knows Betty's a wonderful little cook.
Janet: (glares and puts her hands on her hips, sticking her tongue out at his back) Yes.
Brad: And Ralph himself will be in line for a promotion in a year or so.
Janet: Yes.
The first chord of the "Wedding Song" reverberated through the theater.
Brad turned to Janet with a determined look on his face.
Brad: Hey, Janet.
Janet: Yes brad.
Brad: I've got something to say.
Janet: (breathy) Uh-huh.
Brad: I really loved the ...skillful way you beat the other girls to the bride's bouquet.
Janet: Oh, Brad.
They turn to each other and begin to sing:
Brad: The river was deep but I swam it!
Chorus: Janet.
(The obvious sneer in the chorus's combined voices (the chorus being Riff Raff, Magenta, and Columbia, causes the audience to snicker.)
Brad: The future is ours so let's plan it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: So please don't tell me to can it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
The road was long but I ran it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: There's a fire in my heart and you fan it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: If there's one fool for you than I am it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
Here's the ring to prove that I'm no joker.
There's three ways that love can grow:
That's good, bad, and midiocre!
Oh, J-A-N-E-T I love you so!
Janet: Oh, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: Now we're engaged and I'm so glad!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: That you met mom and you know dad!
Chorus: Oh Brad.
Janet: I've one thing to say, and that's Brad, I'm mad for you too!
Chorus: Oh Brad!
Brad: Oh, dammit.
Janet: I'm mad!
Brad: Oh, Janet!
Janet: For you...
Brad: I love you too-oo-oo-oo.
Together: There's one thing left to do, ah-oo!
Brad: And that's go see the man who began it!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: When we met in his science exam, it
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: Made me give you the eye and then panic!
Chorus: Janet.
Brad: I've one thing to say, and that's dammit, Janet, I love you!
Brad: Dammit, Janet!
Janet: Oh Brad, I'm mad!
Brad: Dammit, Janet!
Together: I love you!
They kissed at the end of the song, amid whoops and cat-calls from the audience.
The curtains slid shut, and the audience clapped.
(Offstage)
It was like ants when their anthill was flooded. There were half a dozen people running around doing things that even the director wasn't sure about.
Rachel: (into headset) Hey, Mits? Is Neko doing her job?
Mistukake: Yeah.
Rachel: (breaths a sigh of relief) Thank the gods. How long do you think the set change will take?
Mitsukake: Three minutes at most.
Rachel: Right.
There was a crash onstage.
Mitsukake: Make that six...
((Alrighty! REVIEW, people! Otherwise I will give you to Frank! Mwahahahaaaaa!
I'm still welcoming cameos!
To the two of you peoples that reviewed (Otaku-no-miko and Wolfdog21), I give a big cookie. Yes, one. You two can fight over it.))