Author's Note: Sorry I haven't updated in forever, but I just got back from California so now things should be a little better. Especially considering that I have nerve damage in my foot and won't be doing much but sitting around for awhile. Good for you guys, but not so much fun for me.

The morning of Qui-Gon's arrival, Mace awoke to the sound of laughter. Obi- Wan and Bant were running around the main room, each holding a pillow. Feathers littered the floor, and Mace looked around in confusion. "What exactly happened here?"

Obi-Wan stopped dead in his tracks, causing Bant to go flying into him. "Um, a pillow fight sir. I can explain."

Mace fought back a smile. Picking up a pillow one of the two seemed to have discarded at some point during the fray, he joined in, laughing at the look on Obi-Wan's face.

The pillow fight continued for a few minutes before Mace finally decided enough was enough. Using the Force, he picked both of them up and began tickling them mercilessly.

"Surrender!" The two yelled at once, and he dropped them gently onto the floor.

"I have to go to a Council meeting. Try to get this place cleaned up before I get back, would you? I'm going to have a break between the morning session and Qui-Gon's debriefing." Mace watched Obi-Wan's face and waited for the excitement he expected to appear as his words sunk in. Instead he saw terror.

"What's wrong Obi?" The boy was practically shaking.

"My Master's coming back today?" He looked so frightened! Mace's heart went out to the boy. "Does he know about, you know, everything I've done while he was gone?"

Mace smiled reassuringly. "Yes he does, and he's disappointed in your behavior, but it'll be okay. You just have to learn not to get into fights."

Obi-Wan's heart was pounding. He was certain that his Master was going to dismiss him as soon as he saw him. Or maybe he'd lecture him first, out of some sense of duty. Whatever happened, Obi-Wan was certain he wasn't going to be a Jedi by the end of the day.
The morning passed far too quickly for Obi-Wan. It seemed like only a few minutes after Mace had left that he returned to check on them.

"Unless something unexpected comes up, Qui's debriefing is the last thing we've got all day. We'll both be by as soon as that's over." Obi-Wan held his breath until Mace left and then collapsed onto the couch, sighing heavily.

"Wanna talk about it?" Bant knew exactly what was wrong, but she didn't know how to fix it. She'd tried convincing him it would be okay, but he hadn't believed her, and she was at a loss as to what she should try next.

"Isn't much to say." Bant sat down beside Obi-Wan, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I'll listen." She thought the best thing for him right now would be to talk off some of the nerves he'd been building up since her Master told him Qui-Gon was back.

"On top of everything else, I had to go and get into a fight with Bruck. How unJedi-like can you get? I broke his nose for crying out loud!"

Bant attempted to soothe him. "No, you got jumped by a bully who doesn't deserve to be a Jedi. It wasn't your fault. You didn't even hit him. Like you told Master Oela, Bruck broke his own nose. It's his fault, not yours, and I'm sure your Master will realize that. You were born to be a Jedi Obi, and nobody in their right mind would have you cast out of the Order." Obi-Wan relaxed slightly. No matter what, Bant still believed in him. Even when he didn't believe in himself.

"Bant?" His voice was hesitant.

"Yes?" He knew she was there for him no matter what.

"Thanks, for you know, trying to convince me everything's okay. Even if you're wrong, talking to you always makes things seem a little bit better."

She laughed. "Obi, everything's going to be okay. And you don't have to thank me. What are friends for?" She hugged him, and he hugged her back. The two sat there for a minute before Bant broke away. "Is your stuff packed?"

Obi-Wan chuckled. "I've been living out of my duffel. There wasn't anything to pack." Bant rolled her eyes, muttering something that sounded distinctly like 'boys!' under her breath. Obi-Wan reached over to tickle her, but stopped dead when he heard the door swish open.

"Obi-Wan? Bant? Where are you guys?" Mace's voice carried down the hallway.

"Living area!" Bant answered, jumping to her feet. Obi-Wan followed suit, albeit a bit less enthusiastically, and the two walked towards the front door of Bant and her Master's apartment.

"Hello Obi-Wan. Hello Bant. You certainly look much healthier than last time I saw you. Mace, I don't mean to be rude, but my apprentice and I should probably be getting back to our own quarters." Qui-Gon's voice was pleasant, and Bant noted with satisfaction that he had called Obi-Wan his apprentice. Granted, he could have been a little more excited to see him, but Qui-Gon had never seemed like the type that showed emotions a lot. Surely he wouldn't say that if he were about to drop him.

Obi-Wan went to the guestroom to retrieve his duffel bag. Once he returned, he turned towards Mace. "Thank you for letting me stay with you while my Master was away." His tone was formal, as if he were thanking a ruler for inviting them to his eldest daughter's wedding.

"My pleasure. You know you're always welcome around here." Mace smiled warmly at the boy, who forced a smile in return.

As they walked back to their quarters, Qui-Gon silently regarded the young man beside him. The boy seemed tense and afraid, and Qui-Gon wondered if he thought his master was still angry. Surely Mace would have said something to him when his communications weren't going through.

As they entered their quarters, Qui-Gon turned to face his Padawan. "Obi- Wan, we need to talk." Obi-Wan obediently followed him to the living room, taking a seat on the opposite end of the couch where his Master sat. Even as he sat down, his heart was pounding. This was it. His career as a Jedi was about to end. Obi-Wan vowed to be brave. He would walk away from the life that was all he had ever known, and he would not look back. It wasn't as if he really had a choice in the first place.

"Padawan, what's wrong?" Qui-Gon had meant to talk about the fight with Bruck first and then discuss the emotions his apprentice was broadcasting, but the terrified look on the boy's face convinced him that the issues regarding his choice to leave his apprentice behind needed to be addressed first.

Obi-Wan just looked at him for a minute. "Nothing's wrong Master." Qui- Gon barely managed to avoid sighing out loud. The boy obviously wasn't going to make this easy.

"Obi-Wan, you know better than to lie to me. What's the matter?" He tried to keep his voice gentle to soften the rebuke, but Obi-Wan looked down in shame. Obi-Wan knew he had to answer his Master, but he couldn't seem to get the words out.

"Areyougoingtodismissme?" He said, not pausing for breath. Realizing what he had just said, he turned bright red. He hadn't handled it diplomatically at all.

Qui-Gon laughed. "Come here you." He pulled Obi-Wan towards him and hugged the boy. Obi-Wan looked startled for a moment before relaxing into his Master's embrace. The two sat there for a moment before Qui-Gon spoke again. "Why would I dismiss you? Have you done something I don't know about?"

His voice was teasing, but Obi-Wan was still too nervous to pick up on that. "I err, well, um, you see...I ran into Bruck in the hall the other day." Qui- Gon nodded. He had already heard this story from Mace, but he wanted Obi- Wan's version. "He started insulting me, and I lost my temper and insulted him back. I know I shouldn't let him get to me, but I just...lost it. The next thing I knew he was jumping at me. I stepped out of the way and he went flying into the wall. He broke his nose. I shouldn't have done it, and I know that, but it was kind of funny to watch him hit the wall." Obi- Wan looked embarrassed. He knew better and Qui-Gon knew it. "The next time he jumped at me, he didn't miss. I swear I didn't hit him." He paused. "I probably would have if it had gone on much longer, but Mace found us then." Obi-Wan turned in his Master's arms so that he was facing him, waiting to see what he had to say.

Qui-Gon didn't know what to say. His apprentice really hadn't done anything wrong, but he had lost his temper, whether it had been violently or not, a problem that needed to be addressed. The boy was obviously beating himself up over the whole mess, so he was tempted to just let it go. Obi-Wan knew it had been wrong. He also knew that if he didn't punish Obi-Wan for the fight the boy would continue to feel guilty. "I've spoken to you several times in the past few months about fighting with Bruck. You know how I feel about it."

Obi-Wan looked down. The only time he had ever heard Qui-Gon yell had been when he had been caught fighting Bruck in the training hall. He had been furious that Obi-Wan would behave so childishly, and the boy had expected a similar reaction this time. "I know you're just a teenager and sometimes you'll get upset, but Jedi can't do that. If you meet someone like Bruck on a mission, you could wind up costing thousands of people their lives just because you lost your temper. I'm tempted to just leave you here until you demonstrate that you can control your temper better."

Obi-Wan looked horrified. "Please I promise it won't happen again, just please don't leave me again!" Obi-Wan sounded so distraught it was almost pathetic.

"If you promise. But if this happens again, you'll be staying home from all missions for two months. Do I make myself perfectly clear Padawan?" Perfect solution. He hadn't actually had to discipline Obi-Wan, but he had managed to make him feel less guilty by telling him that it had been his last chance before he got into serious trouble. "Yes sir!" Obi-Wan nodded enthusiastically. "Now, why did you think I was going to dismiss you? I know it wasn't over the fight with Bruck." Qui-Gon was concerned. He wanted to know what he had done to frighten the boy so badly.

"The thing with my Galactic homework. You sounded so mad. You told me you were 'to angry to deal with me', and the next thing I knew you were telling me to pack. Then when we got there you left without saying goodbye. You didn't say goodbye..." Oh, no. Qui-Gon hadn't even realized he hadn't told him goodbye.

"Oh, Obi-Wan. I'm so sorry. I didn't realize I hadn't said goodbye. And I was angry because of how far you had pushed yourself. You were literally almost ready to collapse, and you'd hidden it from me so that I couldn't help you. I was worried about you Padawan." Qui-Gon's voice was full of fatherly affection, and Obi-Wan knew he meant it. Force he'd been stupid. He should have known Qui-Gon would never kick him out, especially for something like not doing his homework. He hugged his Master tightly, and Qui-Gon returned the embrace, ruffling the boy's hair. "There will always be times when you mess up and get in trouble, and sometimes you may hate me for it, but I love you and I'd never send you away."

Obi-Wan was surprised. "I could never hate you Master. I know when I'm in trouble, and I know it's my own fault." Qui-Gon simply smiled. He knew that attitude wouldn't last. His little boy was fast growing into a young man, and with the changes he seemed to become slightly more unruly, although he was still very well behaved, for a fifteen year old boy. Obi- Wan leaned comfortably against Qui-Gon and the two sat like that for some time, content simply to be together.

Some time later, they decided they were hungry and set about making lunch. Over soup and sandwiches, they discussed Obi-Wan's failure to turn in his homework and his subsequent grounding. Qui-Gon had already decided that since the boy had already made up all of his homework there was no reason not to lift the grounding, news which pleased Obi-Wan greatly.

The boy seemed slightly guilty, and Qui-Gon wondered if he would tell him what was wrong. Finally, as they were finishing lunch, he did. "History wasn't the only class I didn't get my homework done in. I missed some math stuff too." Qui-Gon was surprised. Surely his math teacher would have sent a note home or something by now, unless he'd hid it too. Force help him if that was the case.

"When do you plan to get it done?" His voice held a slight edge, and Obi-Wan tensed slightly. His earlier fear of losing Qui-Gon's affection was gone, but he wasn't sure if his Master still trusted him or not.

"I already did it." Obi-Wan answered quickly, hoping his Master wouldn't be too upset with him.

"Then I don't see it as a problem. We didn't exactly have a chance to discuss the fact that you hadn't been turning in your homework. I'm not surprised it went further than I knew. Is there anything else?" Obi-Wan shook his head. "Then I suggest you call Bant or Garen and see if they want to go hang out." S

miling, Obi-Wan nodded and went to call his friends. When he returned a few hours later, Obi-Wan was surprised to find his Master wasn't anywhere to be found. Knocking softly on his bedroom door, he said, "Master? Are you here?"

The door opened. "I'm right here Padawan. When did you get back? I didn't hear you come in." Qui-Gon walked back into his room, gesturing for Obi-Wan to follow. "I found something of yours in my pocket the other day. I think I must have accidentally grabbed it when I got that note out of your backpack." Picking up a datachip from the table beside his bed, Qui-Gon handed it to his apprentice.

"My journal!! I looked everywhere for this!" His excitement at finding his journal was quickly replaced by nervousness. "Master, you didn't read it did you?" He'd written some things in that journal that he definitely didn't want his Master reading. "No, but I must ask why you would be afraid that I might have. What could you possibly have written that you don't want me reading? Is there something going on I should know about?" Qui-Gon's voice was stern, but he sent a wave of support through their bond, along with assurances that he would love his Padawan no matter what he'd done.

"I-It's nothing like that. I just...my feelings aren't always completely appropriate. I've probably vented in there a few times about things I ought not complain about. Whenever Bant and I swap she laughs about how upset I sound in the entries, and how she usually can't remember me being that upset." Obi-Wan could think of one entry in particular shortly after Bant had fallen ill in which he had used some language to describe his Master. He'd had a hard time focusing during lightsaber drills earlier that day, and his Master had made him spend time after classes meditating when he wanted to go see Bant. He'd been very upset, and he was sure he'd said a few things he would regret if his Master ever read it. There were also some entries where he recounted fights his Master didn't know about, among other things.

"Bant reads these?" Obi-Wan nodded.

"We swap off every two months or so and read each other's journals. It's funny to think about how stupid some of the things we were upset about seem two months later."

"So you trust Bant to read your journal, but you don't trust your own Master. I see." Qui-Gon's voice wasn't accusatory, but Obi-Wan could tell he was hurt.

"I just don't know. There are things in there that I know she'd understand, but I doubt anyone else will, even you." Qui-Gon took the chip from his apprentice and put it into his datapad. He scrolled down before selecting an entry. "How about this one Padawan?" Obi-Wan scanned it over his shoulder and groaned. Of all the entries he could have picked! But he nodded. Gulping, he moved aside so Qui-Gon could read

Month Four, Day Seven, 22763
It's been one of those days. I ran into Bruck in the hallway, and we both threw a few punches, but thankfully my Master doesn't know about it. That's the only thing that's gone right all day. Bant kept pestering me about why I was so upset and wouldn't leave me alone. Finally I told her I never wanted to see her again, and she took a hint and left me alone. I should probably go find her and apologize as soon as I finish this. I also got into an argument with my Master earlier. Why does he have to be such a jerk? Nothing I ever do is right, and even if it is, it isn't good enough Sometimes I wish I had a different Master, who actually gave a damn about me. I locked myself in my room about an hour ago to fume, and thankfully he hasn't tried to get me to come out. If he pulls one of those 'you were being an ungrateful brat but I'm willing to overlook it this one time' things he does sometimes I swear I'll lose it. I hate it when he does that! It's always Obi-Wan do this. No not like that! That's not right. Do it like I showed you. You ought to be able to do this. Well I can't, okay?! I can't do it, and I'm sick of trying. Why can't he just understand I'm not as good as everyone else and I never will be? I'm so sick of this. I don't deserve to be his Padawan. He should just get rid of me and find someone who won't screw everything up.

Qui-Gon looked up as he finished reading and Obi-Wan winced, waiting for his Master's reaction to his writing. He expected a lecture on both fighting and the inappropriateness of his thoughts and was startled when his Master pulled him into a hug.

"You're one of the most remarkable apprentices I know Obi-Wan. Just because you don't always get everything right the first time doesn't mean you aren't as good as everyone else. You're skilled with a lightsaber, strong in the Force, and, as I'm sure Bant would agree, a loyal friend." Qui-Gon held Obi-Wan close, and the boy relaxed into his Master's arms.

"You know how I feel about fighting, but you've improved lately and I don't see any point in lecturing you about a fight you were in almost a month ago. Always remember, even when we argue, that I love you Padawan. If I seem harsh or judgmental, it's only for your own good." While it hurt Qui- Gon to know how upset his apprentice had been when he wrote that journal entry, he was glad he'd read it. It had forced him to acknowledge his Padawan's insecurity, and hopefully deal with it.

Hugging his Master tightly, Obi-Wan smiled. He was content for the first time in almost a month. Bant was better, his homework was finally done, and his Master still loved him. To top it all off, he'd caused Bruck to break his nose without doing anything he could get in trouble for. Life, Obi-Wan Kenobi decided, was indeed a wonderful thing.