So sorry I haven't updated in so long. I myself think that this attempt to
update is pathetic! I'm sort of running out of ideas so I might end the
story soon.
Patrick gingerly peeled back the limp edge of the envelope and withdrew a small piece of paper, which read.
Dear Patrick Star, We are very sorry to inform that we have found no matches for your letter/s. This is probably because you are a pathetic piece of crap that has no personality whatsoever and are very off putting to other members of the public. Enclosed is another form, which you may or may not sign due to whether you would like to try again for the Lonely Hearts column.
Yours faithfully Hue Jass Editor and owner of the Lonely Hearts column.
"Spongebob" Patrick murmured. "I don't think they like me! They called me a 'pathetic piece of crap.' He said starting to crack. "There there Patrick if I get more than one response I'll be happy to share with you." "You would do that for me?" "Of course Patrick you're my best friend" With that Spongebob opened his letter praying for a match. He pulled out a letter and read the words printed in purple ink.
Dear Spongebob Squarepants We are very sorry to inform that we have found no matches for your letter/s. This is probably because you are a pathetic piece of crap that has no personality whatsoever and are very off putting to other members of the public. Enclosed is another form, which you may or may not sign due to whether you would like to try again for the Lonely Hearts column.
Yours faithfully Hugh Jass Editor and owner of the Lonely Hearts column.
"WHAT!!??" said Spongebob "they've said the same thing to me as they said to you. I don't believe this!"
"Oh well maybe we'll just have to sign another application form." Said Patrick "And lie about who we really are." Patrick said with a strange fire dancing in his eyes. "For once Patrick you said something smart, we will have to start over." They wrote new letters and sent them off making themselves seem better than they really are.
My name is Spongebob I am a sponge I am an attractive shade of sunshine yellow. I wear a tie shirt and pants and black lace up shoes with polish on hand. I like to write poetry as you can se in my letter and hope that this try at the Lonely Hearts column is better. I may not be much I may be small but please give me a try and I will be lonely no more. "Patrick my letter may not be exactly lying but I'm sure yours is." Said Spongebob snatching the letter hastily from Patrick's hands.
My name is Patrick Star I am a burly pink starfish and I am a life guard everyone likes a lifeguard. I like to surf and I am a successful businessman/ entre peneur. ( I think that's how you spell it!)From selling chocolates. I am very perplexed as to why I haven't yet got a girlfriend. So write back if you are remotely interested.
They put the letters in envelopes and awaited the arrival of replies excitedly as they both stood by their letter boxes day and night.
Ugh I thought that chapter was horrible.
Patrick gingerly peeled back the limp edge of the envelope and withdrew a small piece of paper, which read.
Dear Patrick Star, We are very sorry to inform that we have found no matches for your letter/s. This is probably because you are a pathetic piece of crap that has no personality whatsoever and are very off putting to other members of the public. Enclosed is another form, which you may or may not sign due to whether you would like to try again for the Lonely Hearts column.
Yours faithfully Hue Jass Editor and owner of the Lonely Hearts column.
"Spongebob" Patrick murmured. "I don't think they like me! They called me a 'pathetic piece of crap.' He said starting to crack. "There there Patrick if I get more than one response I'll be happy to share with you." "You would do that for me?" "Of course Patrick you're my best friend" With that Spongebob opened his letter praying for a match. He pulled out a letter and read the words printed in purple ink.
Dear Spongebob Squarepants We are very sorry to inform that we have found no matches for your letter/s. This is probably because you are a pathetic piece of crap that has no personality whatsoever and are very off putting to other members of the public. Enclosed is another form, which you may or may not sign due to whether you would like to try again for the Lonely Hearts column.
Yours faithfully Hugh Jass Editor and owner of the Lonely Hearts column.
"WHAT!!??" said Spongebob "they've said the same thing to me as they said to you. I don't believe this!"
"Oh well maybe we'll just have to sign another application form." Said Patrick "And lie about who we really are." Patrick said with a strange fire dancing in his eyes. "For once Patrick you said something smart, we will have to start over." They wrote new letters and sent them off making themselves seem better than they really are.
My name is Spongebob I am a sponge I am an attractive shade of sunshine yellow. I wear a tie shirt and pants and black lace up shoes with polish on hand. I like to write poetry as you can se in my letter and hope that this try at the Lonely Hearts column is better. I may not be much I may be small but please give me a try and I will be lonely no more. "Patrick my letter may not be exactly lying but I'm sure yours is." Said Spongebob snatching the letter hastily from Patrick's hands.
My name is Patrick Star I am a burly pink starfish and I am a life guard everyone likes a lifeguard. I like to surf and I am a successful businessman/ entre peneur. ( I think that's how you spell it!)From selling chocolates. I am very perplexed as to why I haven't yet got a girlfriend. So write back if you are remotely interested.
They put the letters in envelopes and awaited the arrival of replies excitedly as they both stood by their letter boxes day and night.
Ugh I thought that chapter was horrible.