Fallaciously Framed! by Dene4 & Simply Sara
Author's Note/Disclaimer: For fun, not profit, as always. Any and all non-canonical and/or impossible situations/characterizations/modernizations/etc. found within the following story, are for the sake of said story, so don't flame us citing our misrepresentations or "mistakes". We know canon, sometimes we just choose to ignore/bend/twist it a little bit. But only a little. And only for fun. The idea, genius, and working force behind this story is Dene4, my younger sister. I, Simply Sara, was simply present to edit, offer suggestions, support, corrections, additions, new ideas, etc. The title of this story in currently tentative and could change. I personally hope it will, but my sister does have dibs on the title rights.
Well, here's to hoping you'll be amused : )
Ch. 1 Trouble With the Tutor
Faramir and Boromir were sitting side by side in a rather spacious room of the White Tower. Their tutor, Ienmir, was teaching an extremely boring lesson on the history of Gondor. Boromir had long ago ceased listening to the woman's droning and was instead doodling lazily on his papers, careful to at least look like he was paying attention.
"Boromir!"
Suddenly he jerked to attention.
"Boromir?" Ienmir inquired angrily, "Have you been paying attention to a word I've been saying? Her wrinkled face bore an expression that was nothing short of fuming.
"Uh…umm…no," replied Boromir, his words perhaps a bit too honest, much too sarcastic, and far too colored in the meaning 'Does it look like I've been paying attention?'
Faramir grinned and suppressed a snicker, looked away from his brother, and pretended to be engrossed in the papers on the desk in front of him.
"And what, Faramir, son of Denethor, is so funny?" Ienmir asked, her gaze too keen for his grins to go unnoticed. Her frustration went up a notch at the lack of respect from both of them.
"Um…sorry Lady Ienmir," he piped up quickly, "I meant no disrespect. I offer my most sincere apologies for my impertinence." Boromir burst out laughing at the response, half at the elaborate respect conveyed, and half at the way his young brother stumbled over the word 'impertinence'. He'd been present the evening his mother had tried to get him to say it without lisping.
Lady Ienmir, however charmed by Faramir, was not amused at Boromir's laughter. "Now what are you so amused about Boromir?" she inquired, slightly confused as to what could be that funny.
Boromir realized she couldn't appreciate the humor for she hadn't been there when Mother had made Faramir memorize that sentence and told him to say it whenever he upset a tutor or other adult.
"Nothing, Lady," Boromir said smiling widely. "Let us continue with the lesson!" he continued anxiously, eager to get attention off of himself before trouble was unavoidable. He was also tired of seeing her so angry for reasons both understandable and fundamental to his survival tonight at dinner.
"Very well, Boromir," Ienmir said, not convinced of his sincerity in the least, but ready to move on to other things, "we'll continue." She was supposed to be teaching them after all. "Apology accepted," she said returning her attention to Faramir, "And very well spoken young man!" Faramir beamed and Boromir had to hide an eye roll.
"Moving back to our original topic, in the year 1975 of the Third Age…" Boromir tuned her out once more and began working on a new project. He carefully ripped a piece of paper into a card-sized square while Ienmir's back was turned pointing to something on a map and nattering on about Lossarnach, trade in the Ethir, and other similarly snore-inducing subjects. He squinted and chewed his lip, thinking of what to write. A brilliant idea popped into his mind. Genius! Boromir thought. He beamed at his handiwork.
On both sides he had written "To keep an idiot busy for hours, just turn this card over!" He cackled mischievously; but, only in his head so Ienmir wouldn't catch his drift.
He absorbed himself in other doodles and time flew by surprisingly fast.
"You are both dismissed," Ienmir said, "You may go home know." Boromir began to leave, making a beeline for the door.
"Of course," Ienmir went on, "I'll be informing your father of your behavior." Boromir froze. "I'm sure he'll be interested in your lack of attention to your studies." Ienmir smiled a smile Boromir supposed only an extremely pleased dragon could smile.
He winced and quit the room, catching up to Faramir. He shook his head. "Great!" he exclaimed, "She really has it in for me." Faramir looked up worriedly, pity evident on his face.
"Who does, Boromir?" a very familiar, feminine voice asked from behind him. Boromir smiled nervously and winced again as he turned around to face his mother.
"Well…uh…I sort of really upset Lady Ienmir." Finduilas nodded, unsurprised. As they walked Boromir hurriedly told her the whole story. To his surprise she laughed. He looked up, unsure.
"You know, that sounds an awful lot like stories your Grandmother used to tell me about your father when he was young," Finduilas said stifling her giggles.
"Daddy did stuff like Boromir?!" Faramir questioned incredulously. Boromir couldn't help but share the sentiment.
"Yes," Finduilas replied. "Once…your father even set his tutor's beard on fire--accidentally of course." She dissolved into giggles again. This time, her sons joined in.
In case any reading this are wondering what happened to "The Great Middle Earth Game Show" I have a confession: I lost the second chapter. The third chapter is already written but without the second chapter it doesn't make sense. My sister, the newly christened "Dene4", is currently re-writing the story and threatening my life for losing it. This story is almost completely finished though and the next chapter should be up very soon. Really. Truly.
Thanks for reading!
God bless,
Dene4 and Sara