Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yuugi.
Thanks to...
neppy: You know, you aren't the only person who said it was shorter. Word count and page wise, it was longer. It was over 3,000 words, ok? What more do you want? I liked the scene with Mitsukake and Tasuki, too. And the quote is actually in this chapter.
Fool Of a Took part II: Orlando? I don't know. I used James Marsters (Spike on Angel and Buffy) as my inspiration for the hair anyway. Although this young guy who works with my mom has the same hair...Anyway, I'm glad you liked the chapter. I cried when Nuriko died so don't feel too bad.
Songwind: Yeah, Shiriko is definitely one cool character. It has been a good ride, hasn't it? But don't worry, this story still has some kicks left. This chapter is one of them.
chibichibi386: No problem, I like making you guys know that you are appreciated. I mean, if you take the time to read and review my story, the least I can do is thank you for it, right? And yes, it is a dangerous quote.
Diana-sama: Thank you so much! It always makes me happy to know that my work is appreciated and understood. I used to update once a week but things have gotten crazy lately so it's been a month or so in between. But I'm working on it. Really. The next chapter should be up in a week or two. Maybe even in a few days. It depends on how much time I have. As for my other story, I'm working on fighting writer's block with it. Byakko is my favorite god, too. And I appreciate the editor comments because believe it or not, they actually help.
Metajoker: Everyone is saying how short it was! It was actually one of the longer chapters in the story! It seemed short because I actually had some paragraphs that were more than a few sentences but it was long! This one is longer, however, and I hope it doesn't disappoint you. It doesn't disappoint me.
FYfangirl26: A lot of the things will be explained eventually. This chapter does some of that but it will probably leave more questions than it actually answers but I hope it helps. And Shiriko likes to know he's loved.
Alatril Carnesr: Yeah, you know, I look at my dog sometimes and just wonder what she's thinking. I mean, they have to be smarter than they we take them for, right? Or am I the only one who feels that way? Yes, well, the question of who she'll fall for should be answered pretty soon. (Just look at the quote for the next chapter.) Thanks for the review!
VanyD: Yes, yes. I know. My updates have been few and far-between. But I'm working on it. In fact, as I say in the end author's note, I should start the next chapter as soon as I finish writing these little thank you notes and proofread.
Otaku Pitcher: Yeah, I was wondering about that. I was like "Ok, I posted...Where's Otaku Pitcher?" And then I check and I found your review. It encouraged me to get this chapter up. In fact, (looks at clock), I've been sitting here trying to finish this chapter for close to two hours now... Man, my brain is fried. But, I have to keep going. So if there are any grammar issues, you know why...
Author's Note (Finally): (falls done dead) Here it is: the chapter to rival that of any other chapter. I have no clue why, but I really, really like this chapter. I think it brings an element of darkness to this story. Up to now, in my opinion, it has been kind of light and funny. Any sad or horrible thing was met with a bit of humor. Not in this chapter. The entire thing is different from a lot of the previous chapters. I hope that doesn't discourage you from reading it. I'm kind of beat right now (I've been working on this chapter for close to two hours straight) so I'm out of witty and clever things to say about it. Give it a chance and you might find you like it. I'm off to proofread it one last time and then post it...
Chapter 33: The Price for Power
It turns out that it was not my body that fell to the ground, rather, my world simply turned upside down so it appeared to have fallen to the ground. Actually, my body continued forward until it reached the middle of the room and then, almost mechanically, sat down cross-legged. It took me a few moments to catch on, but I soon realized that my body and I were two separate entities. It was moving while I was stationary. 'What kind of room is this?' I thought as I gazed at my surroundings. The ceiling, walls, and floor were all made of the same flowing white material as the buildings outside. The tiles were pushed so closely together that I couldn't even see the cracks that I knew must be there. There were no windows and as I turned behind me, I noticed that there wasn't even a door to show where I had come from. The only patch of difference in entire room was a thin line of some sort of script banding across a small portion of the wall by the ceiling.
"Well, I'm here. Now what?" I asked, thinking out loud. Looking at my own sitting body, I decided to follow suit. It was, after all, my only lead.
I placed myself a foot away from the other me and, facing it, mimicked its stance. I felt as though I was looking in a mirror and didn't like what I was seeing. Shaking a little, I closed my eyes and tried to imagine myself in the field and forest of my mind. If this so-called "guardian" was in my mind, then I had better start to look. After the passing of a few minutes, I reopened my eyes and found that I had been somewhat successful. I wasn't in the room anymore, at least. Indeed, I was in what I could only guess was a different section of my mind, the road less traveled on, I suppose you could call it. At the moment, I found myself staring into a dark forest that looked less than inviting. There was a path, however, leading into it. Gritting my teeth, I stepped forward entering and being swallowed by the darkness.
When I next regained my vision, I was floating above a battlefield. Below me, (but still floating), was a girl who appeared not much older than myself. She was surrounded by a bright aura of energy that made her appear to glow. The intensity of the light rivaled that of the midday sun. The soldiers stopped to shield their eyes and the girl spoke.
"You fight for petty reasons. You do not deserve to carry those banners," she said, the coldness and indifference present in her voice was amplified so all could hear her words. As they passed through her lips a strong gust tore through the scene of carnage, ripping banners from their posts and carrying them off the field.
She waited for the exclamations of astonishment and fear to end before speaking again. "The gods are displeased with your actions. Stop this meaningless fighting and go back to your women and children, those that still live. In your haste to guard your rulers' pride, you forgot that which is most important. You disgust me." And with that, another bright flash of light appeared in the sky and she was gone. I felt myself being dragged along with her.
We reappeared in a throne room somewhere and it was then that I heard a voice I recognized.
"Go now, Aideen. You must kill him or the war will never stop," it said. The voice was an echo of that which was heard in the girl's mind but I knew its source and suddenly things made a bit more sense. This girl, Aideen, was an Oracle, just like me, but before me. I was witnessing a portion of her life.
"Yes, Suzaku. As you command, so do I obey."
She exited the room and slipped into a hidden passage. I followed, entranced by what I was viewing. We re-emerged in a bedchamber of someone important, although I could not say whom it belonged to. The emperor, perhaps, or a general. A man that appeared to be in his late teens to early twenties was sitting in it. He smiled when she entered, his eyes showing his joy.
"I wasn't expecting you back quite so soon, Aideen, but it matters not. You returned to me just the same," he greeted, if you can call that a greeting. "I'm glad you are safe."
"I haven't returned to you, Menasha. I've come back to kill you. I cannot allow to continue your ideas of rebellion against the gods," she responded. Her voice sounded emotionless to a degree that I knew could only come from a forced voice. Something told me this man meant something to her but whether it was friend, lover, or old master, I lacked the information to tell.
The look of shock that passed his face confirmed my belief: obviously he wasn't expecting this. "Very well. If you are allowing the gods to control you this much, then let us do this."
He drew a sword and Aideen did the same, although from where hers came, I couldn't tell you. Menasha was obviously the more skilled fighter but Aideen had the gods in her head to make up for it. All four symbols were glowing on her body and part of me wondered if that was even possible. The other part just decided that it was simply proof of how little I actually knew about what was going on within myself. Aideen had the man on the defensive now, and was slowly gaining ground. It seemed fending off her attacks was the most he could do and even that was slowly taking everything out of him. His blade slipped and Aideen's pierced him right in the chest.
"Aideen...I know...you'd...never do this to me...so I...forgive...you..." he managed to sputter in between gasps for breath. It seemed she must have hit him near the lung. After those few words, his eyes assumed the glaze of death.
Aideen fell to the ground, eyes already encased in tears and sobbed. "How could I do this to him?" she cried.
My vision went dark again and I found myself in another place. This one seemed to be in Aideen's world. The Oracle herself was sprawled on the bed, apparently asleep. It took me a moment to see the red gashes down both wrists before I realized she was no longer living. I shut my eyes to shield myself from her corpse and when I finally opened them again, I was back in the forest.
"What you just saw was taken from the life of the first Oracle, Aideen. She could not handle the knowledge of what she had done to ensure peace in this world. The life of one man is a fair price for the peace of all but she did not believe so. Soon after returning to her world, she killed herself, as you saw," a woman's voice said from somewhere near me. The speaker emerged from the forest in front of me and I nearly gasped. She had long dark hair, brown like mine was once, and eyes the same tint as my own should be. She was my height, my build, my everything. She was me! "Does my appearance frighten you? Most people find that seeing themselves eases some of the shock out of having someone else in their minds. But if you wish, I will change. I suppose you'd rather not see Aideen again so soon, although most of the early Oracles had similar fates..."
"Why don't you try appearing as yourself rather than...than stealing the bodies of others? Or don't you have your own form?" I interrupted, rather harsher than I probably should have. I couldn't help it though. The shock of seeing Aideen's corpse was too fresh in my mind to be anything but emotional. How can she talk so calmly about the fates of people in the past? Isn't she affected by the knowledge that they killed themselves at all?
"My dear child," she chided. It seemed oddly mocking seeing someone who looked exactly like myself calling me "child." "I fear that as part of my service to the gods, I lost my physical form centuries ago. After all, what need do I have of a body when I spend most of my time in another's mind?" She smiled a condescending smile. "But, if you wish, I will create an image of myself as I once was. I never met an Oracle that was quite this emotional. But, I knew from my observations of you that you were a- how should I put this?- passionate individual."
Her form flickered for a moment before becoming stable again. She was now taller than me, slimmer, and, overall, more mature looking. Her hair was long and a black so dark it made a night without moon or stars seem bright and her eyes were a sapphire blue. 'And the gods allowed her appearance to be "lost"?!' I couldn't help but think.
"Is that better for you?" she asked. I showed my teeth in what I hope she took as a smile. "Good because we have far more important matters than my looks to discuss today. You're here to ask me for power, correct?"
"Well...yeah but what was with that memory and why did I have to see it?" I replied.
"That memory was the basis on which the rules for the Oracles were based on. In the days of the earliest guests from another world, their power was unlimited, the connection with the gods was stronger, and even after they returned to their own worlds, these things remained. The gods thought that by allowing them to keep their powers upon returning to their world, they wouldn't feel cheated. They also assumed that with the connection still in place, they would be able to watch over you oracles and make sure you don't do anything stupid. They failed to recognize the fact that you humans can't handle certain things, large amounts of power and a guilty conscience among them. So when they returned you to your own world with both those items...let's just say things didn't always go according to plan."
"Like Aideen," I said.
"Yes, like Aideen and like the two who followed her before the rules were changed. The second also committed suicide while the third went insane and had to be...exterminated. Rebellion cannot be allowed, even among oracles. You are not so invaluable that your mistakes can be tolerated. It would be best for you to remember that," the still nameless guardian responded. "Although it seems the gods have taken a peculiar liking to you."
"So basically you're telling me that if I'm an obedient little girl I won't die?" I asked, forcing calm in my voice.
"Exactly. You learn fast."
"Any other words of wisdom or are you all out? I don't have much time so I'd really like to just get this over with. Now, preferably," I snapped.
"No time for chit chat, eh? Very well. But know this, there is a price for my assistance," she breathed.
"Name it."
"When you leave this world, any power I give you or that you received here will be removed from you entirely," she informed me. 'That's not too bad,' I thought.
"Is that all?" I asked.
"Of course not. I told you that there are two things a human cannot live with, especially in cases like yours. If you returned to your world with memories of places and people that do not exist there and that you may never see again, the pain you would feel could quite possibly equal that of Aideen's or the others. You may very well kill yourself or plan a revolt as well. In light of this, the gods have required that any Oracle must have their minds purged of anything about this world when they are returned to their own. So, I'll be taking your memories as well," she added.
I stood there stunned beyond words. My memories? She can take them away from me? "You mean I won't remember any of it? Not Tasuki, Chichiri, or even Nakago?" I stammered, unable to comprehend this concept. Amnesia is one thing but to have them removed from my mind? Granted, anything about Nakago would not be sorely missed, but the others? All the people I've met, even the gods...? I don't know if I could handle that.
"If we let you remember them, what would you do? Wallow in your sorrow knowing you'll never see them again? Wither away in despair until all that's left is a hollow shell of what you once were? No, no, no. A quick painless break is best," she replied.
"I...don't think I can do it..."
"You don't have a choice, darling. It's your memories or the world. What good will a couple of recollections do you if the people who were in them are destroyed? Would you rather have a few fond pages in your memoirs of Tasuki or the knowledge that it was your own weakness that killed him? Nothing in this world is free, Yume. There is always a price to pay for power. Whether you agree or not, they will be taken from you. At least this way you may be able to make a difference in the battle that will inevitably occur between Nakago's forces and the Suzaku seishi," she continued. "If it makes you feel better, they will keep their memories of you."
I still couldn't quite grip this idea. They will all remember me but it will be as if I was never here to me. I had a lot of bad experiences here, true, but also I had some good ones. Forfeiting them didn't seem fair yet keeping them and giving up even a chance to make a difference in the fate of both worlds didn't seem right, either. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I gave it up, no matter how much I want to. Doing anything else would be selfish to a degree that could potentially lead to the deaths of those I care about.
"...Fine...I'll...do it," I told her.
She smiled. "I knew you would. You're a stubborn girl, but you're not stupid. There are just a few more things we have to go over. Because of the one girl who went psycho, I can't just give you power. I will be taking a more active role in your life. Just think of me as another one of the gods. Also, any power I give you comes from within yourself. Because every person is different, the powers I release are all different. There is no guarantee of what it will be or if it will even help you in the fight. You could wind up with the ability to level mountains or something useless like being able to change your hair color. So, if it is a 'stupid' or 'trivial' power, remember that I warned in advance."
"Wait, one more thing. I want to keep my memories until the very moment I enter my world, ok?" I said. "And I want to know your name."
"I suppose it won't hurt anything to let you keep them until then. It's a deal then," she answered. "And as for my name, I am called Syalle. One last thing, your powers will manifest themselves when they are needed. All I do is release them. They will remain dormant until then. Now then, let's do this, shall we?"
Her face took on a look of concentration and a light emanated from her hands. It grew until it was about the size of a grapefruit and then it struck me in the head. I shut my eyes on impulse and when I reopened them, I was back in the white room. A door had appeared and I opened it and exited the room, just in time to see Suzaku be consumed by a blue light.
"Suzaku!!! No!!!!" I screamed. But it was too late. He was gone, vanished literally into thin air. "What happened?" I demanded of the remaining two gods.
"Yui made her first wish, the Light help us all," Genbu replied, for once too shaken to include a nasty comment in his answer. But he recovered and added, "I hope you were successful, girl, because if you weren't, we are all dead."
"I got my powers but I don't know what they are yet. Syalle said they will appear when my need is great or some cryptic thing like that." I took another look where Suzaku had been standing a moment before, and whispered, "I hope she's right."
Author's Note: Cue the suspenseful music! I think...I might actually be proud of this chapter. I know it was a lot of dialogue, but I think it was pretty well written all around. I've been experimenting with a slightly more mature writing style lately, although I'm not sure if anyone but me will even notice the subtle difference in the language I'm using and the way things are expressed. I hope you can tell. I am trying to make this story better. Anyway, what's going on with Yume and these new powers? What will they be? (Yeah, what will they be? I haven't completely decided yet. To be perfectly honest, this entire chapter was written on a whim I had. I thought it would be kind of ironic if she couldn't remember anything, especially with the little bit of planning I've done on the sequel.) Well, that's all I've got to say on this matter. I hope you like this latest plot twist. As soon as I'm done fine-tuning this chapter and I get it posted, I'm going to work on Chapter 34 for you. Hopefully it will be up soon. As for the quote...I'll make one up for you that should appear in the next chapter.
"My time here is coming to an end and I didn't want to leave without telling you the truth, Tasuki."
(Just to let you know, I am grinning evilly right now.)
~Smack
Oh and the final word count of this chapter, (including author's notes and such) is... 3,806 words. I hope you aren't disappointed with its length.
Thanks to...
neppy: You know, you aren't the only person who said it was shorter. Word count and page wise, it was longer. It was over 3,000 words, ok? What more do you want? I liked the scene with Mitsukake and Tasuki, too. And the quote is actually in this chapter.
Fool Of a Took part II: Orlando? I don't know. I used James Marsters (Spike on Angel and Buffy) as my inspiration for the hair anyway. Although this young guy who works with my mom has the same hair...Anyway, I'm glad you liked the chapter. I cried when Nuriko died so don't feel too bad.
Songwind: Yeah, Shiriko is definitely one cool character. It has been a good ride, hasn't it? But don't worry, this story still has some kicks left. This chapter is one of them.
chibichibi386: No problem, I like making you guys know that you are appreciated. I mean, if you take the time to read and review my story, the least I can do is thank you for it, right? And yes, it is a dangerous quote.
Diana-sama: Thank you so much! It always makes me happy to know that my work is appreciated and understood. I used to update once a week but things have gotten crazy lately so it's been a month or so in between. But I'm working on it. Really. The next chapter should be up in a week or two. Maybe even in a few days. It depends on how much time I have. As for my other story, I'm working on fighting writer's block with it. Byakko is my favorite god, too. And I appreciate the editor comments because believe it or not, they actually help.
Metajoker: Everyone is saying how short it was! It was actually one of the longer chapters in the story! It seemed short because I actually had some paragraphs that were more than a few sentences but it was long! This one is longer, however, and I hope it doesn't disappoint you. It doesn't disappoint me.
FYfangirl26: A lot of the things will be explained eventually. This chapter does some of that but it will probably leave more questions than it actually answers but I hope it helps. And Shiriko likes to know he's loved.
Alatril Carnesr: Yeah, you know, I look at my dog sometimes and just wonder what she's thinking. I mean, they have to be smarter than they we take them for, right? Or am I the only one who feels that way? Yes, well, the question of who she'll fall for should be answered pretty soon. (Just look at the quote for the next chapter.) Thanks for the review!
VanyD: Yes, yes. I know. My updates have been few and far-between. But I'm working on it. In fact, as I say in the end author's note, I should start the next chapter as soon as I finish writing these little thank you notes and proofread.
Otaku Pitcher: Yeah, I was wondering about that. I was like "Ok, I posted...Where's Otaku Pitcher?" And then I check and I found your review. It encouraged me to get this chapter up. In fact, (looks at clock), I've been sitting here trying to finish this chapter for close to two hours now... Man, my brain is fried. But, I have to keep going. So if there are any grammar issues, you know why...
Author's Note (Finally): (falls done dead) Here it is: the chapter to rival that of any other chapter. I have no clue why, but I really, really like this chapter. I think it brings an element of darkness to this story. Up to now, in my opinion, it has been kind of light and funny. Any sad or horrible thing was met with a bit of humor. Not in this chapter. The entire thing is different from a lot of the previous chapters. I hope that doesn't discourage you from reading it. I'm kind of beat right now (I've been working on this chapter for close to two hours straight) so I'm out of witty and clever things to say about it. Give it a chance and you might find you like it. I'm off to proofread it one last time and then post it...
Chapter 33: The Price for Power
It turns out that it was not my body that fell to the ground, rather, my world simply turned upside down so it appeared to have fallen to the ground. Actually, my body continued forward until it reached the middle of the room and then, almost mechanically, sat down cross-legged. It took me a few moments to catch on, but I soon realized that my body and I were two separate entities. It was moving while I was stationary. 'What kind of room is this?' I thought as I gazed at my surroundings. The ceiling, walls, and floor were all made of the same flowing white material as the buildings outside. The tiles were pushed so closely together that I couldn't even see the cracks that I knew must be there. There were no windows and as I turned behind me, I noticed that there wasn't even a door to show where I had come from. The only patch of difference in entire room was a thin line of some sort of script banding across a small portion of the wall by the ceiling.
"Well, I'm here. Now what?" I asked, thinking out loud. Looking at my own sitting body, I decided to follow suit. It was, after all, my only lead.
I placed myself a foot away from the other me and, facing it, mimicked its stance. I felt as though I was looking in a mirror and didn't like what I was seeing. Shaking a little, I closed my eyes and tried to imagine myself in the field and forest of my mind. If this so-called "guardian" was in my mind, then I had better start to look. After the passing of a few minutes, I reopened my eyes and found that I had been somewhat successful. I wasn't in the room anymore, at least. Indeed, I was in what I could only guess was a different section of my mind, the road less traveled on, I suppose you could call it. At the moment, I found myself staring into a dark forest that looked less than inviting. There was a path, however, leading into it. Gritting my teeth, I stepped forward entering and being swallowed by the darkness.
When I next regained my vision, I was floating above a battlefield. Below me, (but still floating), was a girl who appeared not much older than myself. She was surrounded by a bright aura of energy that made her appear to glow. The intensity of the light rivaled that of the midday sun. The soldiers stopped to shield their eyes and the girl spoke.
"You fight for petty reasons. You do not deserve to carry those banners," she said, the coldness and indifference present in her voice was amplified so all could hear her words. As they passed through her lips a strong gust tore through the scene of carnage, ripping banners from their posts and carrying them off the field.
She waited for the exclamations of astonishment and fear to end before speaking again. "The gods are displeased with your actions. Stop this meaningless fighting and go back to your women and children, those that still live. In your haste to guard your rulers' pride, you forgot that which is most important. You disgust me." And with that, another bright flash of light appeared in the sky and she was gone. I felt myself being dragged along with her.
We reappeared in a throne room somewhere and it was then that I heard a voice I recognized.
"Go now, Aideen. You must kill him or the war will never stop," it said. The voice was an echo of that which was heard in the girl's mind but I knew its source and suddenly things made a bit more sense. This girl, Aideen, was an Oracle, just like me, but before me. I was witnessing a portion of her life.
"Yes, Suzaku. As you command, so do I obey."
She exited the room and slipped into a hidden passage. I followed, entranced by what I was viewing. We re-emerged in a bedchamber of someone important, although I could not say whom it belonged to. The emperor, perhaps, or a general. A man that appeared to be in his late teens to early twenties was sitting in it. He smiled when she entered, his eyes showing his joy.
"I wasn't expecting you back quite so soon, Aideen, but it matters not. You returned to me just the same," he greeted, if you can call that a greeting. "I'm glad you are safe."
"I haven't returned to you, Menasha. I've come back to kill you. I cannot allow to continue your ideas of rebellion against the gods," she responded. Her voice sounded emotionless to a degree that I knew could only come from a forced voice. Something told me this man meant something to her but whether it was friend, lover, or old master, I lacked the information to tell.
The look of shock that passed his face confirmed my belief: obviously he wasn't expecting this. "Very well. If you are allowing the gods to control you this much, then let us do this."
He drew a sword and Aideen did the same, although from where hers came, I couldn't tell you. Menasha was obviously the more skilled fighter but Aideen had the gods in her head to make up for it. All four symbols were glowing on her body and part of me wondered if that was even possible. The other part just decided that it was simply proof of how little I actually knew about what was going on within myself. Aideen had the man on the defensive now, and was slowly gaining ground. It seemed fending off her attacks was the most he could do and even that was slowly taking everything out of him. His blade slipped and Aideen's pierced him right in the chest.
"Aideen...I know...you'd...never do this to me...so I...forgive...you..." he managed to sputter in between gasps for breath. It seemed she must have hit him near the lung. After those few words, his eyes assumed the glaze of death.
Aideen fell to the ground, eyes already encased in tears and sobbed. "How could I do this to him?" she cried.
My vision went dark again and I found myself in another place. This one seemed to be in Aideen's world. The Oracle herself was sprawled on the bed, apparently asleep. It took me a moment to see the red gashes down both wrists before I realized she was no longer living. I shut my eyes to shield myself from her corpse and when I finally opened them again, I was back in the forest.
"What you just saw was taken from the life of the first Oracle, Aideen. She could not handle the knowledge of what she had done to ensure peace in this world. The life of one man is a fair price for the peace of all but she did not believe so. Soon after returning to her world, she killed herself, as you saw," a woman's voice said from somewhere near me. The speaker emerged from the forest in front of me and I nearly gasped. She had long dark hair, brown like mine was once, and eyes the same tint as my own should be. She was my height, my build, my everything. She was me! "Does my appearance frighten you? Most people find that seeing themselves eases some of the shock out of having someone else in their minds. But if you wish, I will change. I suppose you'd rather not see Aideen again so soon, although most of the early Oracles had similar fates..."
"Why don't you try appearing as yourself rather than...than stealing the bodies of others? Or don't you have your own form?" I interrupted, rather harsher than I probably should have. I couldn't help it though. The shock of seeing Aideen's corpse was too fresh in my mind to be anything but emotional. How can she talk so calmly about the fates of people in the past? Isn't she affected by the knowledge that they killed themselves at all?
"My dear child," she chided. It seemed oddly mocking seeing someone who looked exactly like myself calling me "child." "I fear that as part of my service to the gods, I lost my physical form centuries ago. After all, what need do I have of a body when I spend most of my time in another's mind?" She smiled a condescending smile. "But, if you wish, I will create an image of myself as I once was. I never met an Oracle that was quite this emotional. But, I knew from my observations of you that you were a- how should I put this?- passionate individual."
Her form flickered for a moment before becoming stable again. She was now taller than me, slimmer, and, overall, more mature looking. Her hair was long and a black so dark it made a night without moon or stars seem bright and her eyes were a sapphire blue. 'And the gods allowed her appearance to be "lost"?!' I couldn't help but think.
"Is that better for you?" she asked. I showed my teeth in what I hope she took as a smile. "Good because we have far more important matters than my looks to discuss today. You're here to ask me for power, correct?"
"Well...yeah but what was with that memory and why did I have to see it?" I replied.
"That memory was the basis on which the rules for the Oracles were based on. In the days of the earliest guests from another world, their power was unlimited, the connection with the gods was stronger, and even after they returned to their own worlds, these things remained. The gods thought that by allowing them to keep their powers upon returning to their world, they wouldn't feel cheated. They also assumed that with the connection still in place, they would be able to watch over you oracles and make sure you don't do anything stupid. They failed to recognize the fact that you humans can't handle certain things, large amounts of power and a guilty conscience among them. So when they returned you to your own world with both those items...let's just say things didn't always go according to plan."
"Like Aideen," I said.
"Yes, like Aideen and like the two who followed her before the rules were changed. The second also committed suicide while the third went insane and had to be...exterminated. Rebellion cannot be allowed, even among oracles. You are not so invaluable that your mistakes can be tolerated. It would be best for you to remember that," the still nameless guardian responded. "Although it seems the gods have taken a peculiar liking to you."
"So basically you're telling me that if I'm an obedient little girl I won't die?" I asked, forcing calm in my voice.
"Exactly. You learn fast."
"Any other words of wisdom or are you all out? I don't have much time so I'd really like to just get this over with. Now, preferably," I snapped.
"No time for chit chat, eh? Very well. But know this, there is a price for my assistance," she breathed.
"Name it."
"When you leave this world, any power I give you or that you received here will be removed from you entirely," she informed me. 'That's not too bad,' I thought.
"Is that all?" I asked.
"Of course not. I told you that there are two things a human cannot live with, especially in cases like yours. If you returned to your world with memories of places and people that do not exist there and that you may never see again, the pain you would feel could quite possibly equal that of Aideen's or the others. You may very well kill yourself or plan a revolt as well. In light of this, the gods have required that any Oracle must have their minds purged of anything about this world when they are returned to their own. So, I'll be taking your memories as well," she added.
I stood there stunned beyond words. My memories? She can take them away from me? "You mean I won't remember any of it? Not Tasuki, Chichiri, or even Nakago?" I stammered, unable to comprehend this concept. Amnesia is one thing but to have them removed from my mind? Granted, anything about Nakago would not be sorely missed, but the others? All the people I've met, even the gods...? I don't know if I could handle that.
"If we let you remember them, what would you do? Wallow in your sorrow knowing you'll never see them again? Wither away in despair until all that's left is a hollow shell of what you once were? No, no, no. A quick painless break is best," she replied.
"I...don't think I can do it..."
"You don't have a choice, darling. It's your memories or the world. What good will a couple of recollections do you if the people who were in them are destroyed? Would you rather have a few fond pages in your memoirs of Tasuki or the knowledge that it was your own weakness that killed him? Nothing in this world is free, Yume. There is always a price to pay for power. Whether you agree or not, they will be taken from you. At least this way you may be able to make a difference in the battle that will inevitably occur between Nakago's forces and the Suzaku seishi," she continued. "If it makes you feel better, they will keep their memories of you."
I still couldn't quite grip this idea. They will all remember me but it will be as if I was never here to me. I had a lot of bad experiences here, true, but also I had some good ones. Forfeiting them didn't seem fair yet keeping them and giving up even a chance to make a difference in the fate of both worlds didn't seem right, either. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I gave it up, no matter how much I want to. Doing anything else would be selfish to a degree that could potentially lead to the deaths of those I care about.
"...Fine...I'll...do it," I told her.
She smiled. "I knew you would. You're a stubborn girl, but you're not stupid. There are just a few more things we have to go over. Because of the one girl who went psycho, I can't just give you power. I will be taking a more active role in your life. Just think of me as another one of the gods. Also, any power I give you comes from within yourself. Because every person is different, the powers I release are all different. There is no guarantee of what it will be or if it will even help you in the fight. You could wind up with the ability to level mountains or something useless like being able to change your hair color. So, if it is a 'stupid' or 'trivial' power, remember that I warned in advance."
"Wait, one more thing. I want to keep my memories until the very moment I enter my world, ok?" I said. "And I want to know your name."
"I suppose it won't hurt anything to let you keep them until then. It's a deal then," she answered. "And as for my name, I am called Syalle. One last thing, your powers will manifest themselves when they are needed. All I do is release them. They will remain dormant until then. Now then, let's do this, shall we?"
Her face took on a look of concentration and a light emanated from her hands. It grew until it was about the size of a grapefruit and then it struck me in the head. I shut my eyes on impulse and when I reopened them, I was back in the white room. A door had appeared and I opened it and exited the room, just in time to see Suzaku be consumed by a blue light.
"Suzaku!!! No!!!!" I screamed. But it was too late. He was gone, vanished literally into thin air. "What happened?" I demanded of the remaining two gods.
"Yui made her first wish, the Light help us all," Genbu replied, for once too shaken to include a nasty comment in his answer. But he recovered and added, "I hope you were successful, girl, because if you weren't, we are all dead."
"I got my powers but I don't know what they are yet. Syalle said they will appear when my need is great or some cryptic thing like that." I took another look where Suzaku had been standing a moment before, and whispered, "I hope she's right."
Author's Note: Cue the suspenseful music! I think...I might actually be proud of this chapter. I know it was a lot of dialogue, but I think it was pretty well written all around. I've been experimenting with a slightly more mature writing style lately, although I'm not sure if anyone but me will even notice the subtle difference in the language I'm using and the way things are expressed. I hope you can tell. I am trying to make this story better. Anyway, what's going on with Yume and these new powers? What will they be? (Yeah, what will they be? I haven't completely decided yet. To be perfectly honest, this entire chapter was written on a whim I had. I thought it would be kind of ironic if she couldn't remember anything, especially with the little bit of planning I've done on the sequel.) Well, that's all I've got to say on this matter. I hope you like this latest plot twist. As soon as I'm done fine-tuning this chapter and I get it posted, I'm going to work on Chapter 34 for you. Hopefully it will be up soon. As for the quote...I'll make one up for you that should appear in the next chapter.
"My time here is coming to an end and I didn't want to leave without telling you the truth, Tasuki."
(Just to let you know, I am grinning evilly right now.)
~Smack
Oh and the final word count of this chapter, (including author's notes and such) is... 3,806 words. I hope you aren't disappointed with its length.