A/N - Another update. My brain's been on hyper mode for the most part. -sigh-
Disclaimer - I don't own the entire cast of Weiss Kreuz. I'm only borrowing to embarrass the crap out of them and to entertain all you lowly people... Wait... That didn't come out right. Eheh.
THE LITTLE RED 'SHI-NE'-ING KATANA (LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD)
Little Fujimiya Aya (no, not the girl! The other one!) was skipping around happily in a field of flowers. Well, tromping, more like, because Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana wasn't very 'Little' anymore. He was a tall man, his head adorned with his beloved bendable katana and he had a little basket in hand. He loved wearing the katana as a scarf, but his friend, Little Yellow Womanizer (Yohji, in other words) told him that it only made him look like a freak. Little Aya didn't take heed of the ever-so-helpful advice, but carried on being his lovable self.
He was off to see his (rather psychotic) albino of a grandmother but he wasn't looking forward to it. However, Mommy Omi demanded that Little Aya paid her a visit. Little Aya chose to spend his time in a field of daisies.
"Oh my gosh! It's him! Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana! Come on, girls!"
Little Aya froze and ran for his life as he saw a mob of pre-teen girls charging after him. He wasn't so lucky, though, and fell flat on his face as he fell over a tree root. He was glomped from every side and felt himself being pulled, pushed, shoved, poked, jabbed (and generally molested) everywhere.
"Wai! He's so cute! Look Look! I've got a lock of his hair!"
"Little Aya! --hey! stop pushing!-- I want to bear your children!"
"Oh, Yume! Look at his fine arse! I could just--" He then felt a pinch on his backside. Sucking in a deep breath, Little Aya began to holler.
"IF YOU'RE NOT ENJOYING THE GREENERY, GEDDOUT!!!"
A few girls started to cry as he had just burst their precious eardrums but most of them continued anyway. It was until a groping hand flittered dangerously close to his lower region did Little Aya summoned himself to flee to save his boy parts, little basket in tow.
"Hey! He's getting away! Get him, girls!"
And with collected shrieks, the mob trampled after him.
---
MEANWHILE
---
An evil mutated wolf with a fish face prowled the area. He was hungry, DAMMIT! He need food! The wolf then saw smoke coming west and with a deep cackle, he followed. A few moments later, he came across a deserted church. Sniggering to himself, the Masafumi mutated wolf with a fish face went inside.
"What the hell?"
He came across a normal church interior but what wasn't so normal was the pale figure lying down on the altar. "Ah, Aya! Is that ye?" came the Irish accent. Masafumi got closer and had a fright. THIS was a human!? It sure didn't look edible to him! The hair was BLUE! Sure this would get him diarrhea if he ate this. He tossed the... THING -shudder- into a cupboard and stole the... THING's clothes. He didn't even bother to lock it, seeing that someone so UGLY would be stupid as well. He then put on the hideous costume, laid on the altar, and waited. And waited. And waited.
"DAMMIT, I NEED FOOD!!!"
---
BACK TO OUR LITTLE STAR
---
After a few more games of Hide and Go Seek, Little Aya finally escaped the horrible girls! He began to sob loudly behind the bush, praying for his sanity before he remembered his grandmother and hopped off. As the scary church came into view, he had the strongest urge to fly away and bawl like a baby once more. However, brave Little Aya gathered his courage and walked (stomped) boldly into the church. He headed towards the altar and had a shock. Wow! His grandmother sure looked good!
"Oi, you, why do you have big eyes?" he asked, in his usual eloquence. Masafumi eyed this (rather frightening) human. "And why do you have such big lips?" he continued, "And why--"
The wolf couldn't stand it anymore. "It's called a FACELIFT, honey!"
Little Aya felt something was wrong and unwrapped his bendable katana. It wobbled dangerously over Masafumi's chest and the wolf jumped out of the costume. "I'm going to the dream world! And NO ONE'S GONNA STOP ME!!!" he yelled, sounding like a character from a bad Western movie. Little Aya's face got as red as his hair and he raged (for absolutely no reason).
"TAKATORI!!!"
Our dear sweet Little Aya then stabbed the horrid wolf ("Yuck! Blood!") and freed his REAL idiot of a grandmother from the closet (the grandmother who had no brains to try to open the door, but instead was only intent on cursing God the whole damn time). Little Aya felt that the wolf was actually better looking than his grandma, but we can't all have what we want, can we? Grandma Farfie gave a scream of delight as she saw the pool of crimson surrounding the wolf and began to sprinkle the blood all around the pedestal.
-NOTE: THIS SCENE HAS BEEN OMITTED DUE TO EXCESSIVE GORINESS-
---
And so the ending begins...
Little Aya was happily skipping in a field of flowers, enjoying the morning breeze, before --
"VROOM!!!"
A Porsche passed by and destroyed the beautiful daisies. The person in the car looked back and grinned a toothless sinister smirk before speeding away. Little Aya stared at the flowerless field.
"TAKATORI!!!"
Little did Little Aya know that his little 'TAKATORI' bellow attracted all the pretty little girls in the little area. Little. Lit-tle. Little.
"Look, Look! There he is! It's Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana! Let's go, girls!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
---
Disclaimer - I don't own the entire cast of Weiss Kreuz. I'm only borrowing to embarrass the crap out of them and to entertain all you lowly people... Wait... That didn't come out right. Eheh.
THE LITTLE RED 'SHI-NE'-ING KATANA (LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD)
Little Fujimiya Aya (no, not the girl! The other one!) was skipping around happily in a field of flowers. Well, tromping, more like, because Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana wasn't very 'Little' anymore. He was a tall man, his head adorned with his beloved bendable katana and he had a little basket in hand. He loved wearing the katana as a scarf, but his friend, Little Yellow Womanizer (Yohji, in other words) told him that it only made him look like a freak. Little Aya didn't take heed of the ever-so-helpful advice, but carried on being his lovable self.
He was off to see his (rather psychotic) albino of a grandmother but he wasn't looking forward to it. However, Mommy Omi demanded that Little Aya paid her a visit. Little Aya chose to spend his time in a field of daisies.
"Oh my gosh! It's him! Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana! Come on, girls!"
Little Aya froze and ran for his life as he saw a mob of pre-teen girls charging after him. He wasn't so lucky, though, and fell flat on his face as he fell over a tree root. He was glomped from every side and felt himself being pulled, pushed, shoved, poked, jabbed (and generally molested) everywhere.
"Wai! He's so cute! Look Look! I've got a lock of his hair!"
"Little Aya! --hey! stop pushing!-- I want to bear your children!"
"Oh, Yume! Look at his fine arse! I could just--" He then felt a pinch on his backside. Sucking in a deep breath, Little Aya began to holler.
"IF YOU'RE NOT ENJOYING THE GREENERY, GEDDOUT!!!"
A few girls started to cry as he had just burst their precious eardrums but most of them continued anyway. It was until a groping hand flittered dangerously close to his lower region did Little Aya summoned himself to flee to save his boy parts, little basket in tow.
"Hey! He's getting away! Get him, girls!"
And with collected shrieks, the mob trampled after him.
---
MEANWHILE
---
An evil mutated wolf with a fish face prowled the area. He was hungry, DAMMIT! He need food! The wolf then saw smoke coming west and with a deep cackle, he followed. A few moments later, he came across a deserted church. Sniggering to himself, the Masafumi mutated wolf with a fish face went inside.
"What the hell?"
He came across a normal church interior but what wasn't so normal was the pale figure lying down on the altar. "Ah, Aya! Is that ye?" came the Irish accent. Masafumi got closer and had a fright. THIS was a human!? It sure didn't look edible to him! The hair was BLUE! Sure this would get him diarrhea if he ate this. He tossed the... THING -shudder- into a cupboard and stole the... THING's clothes. He didn't even bother to lock it, seeing that someone so UGLY would be stupid as well. He then put on the hideous costume, laid on the altar, and waited. And waited. And waited.
"DAMMIT, I NEED FOOD!!!"
---
BACK TO OUR LITTLE STAR
---
After a few more games of Hide and Go Seek, Little Aya finally escaped the horrible girls! He began to sob loudly behind the bush, praying for his sanity before he remembered his grandmother and hopped off. As the scary church came into view, he had the strongest urge to fly away and bawl like a baby once more. However, brave Little Aya gathered his courage and walked (stomped) boldly into the church. He headed towards the altar and had a shock. Wow! His grandmother sure looked good!
"Oi, you, why do you have big eyes?" he asked, in his usual eloquence. Masafumi eyed this (rather frightening) human. "And why do you have such big lips?" he continued, "And why--"
The wolf couldn't stand it anymore. "It's called a FACELIFT, honey!"
Little Aya felt something was wrong and unwrapped his bendable katana. It wobbled dangerously over Masafumi's chest and the wolf jumped out of the costume. "I'm going to the dream world! And NO ONE'S GONNA STOP ME!!!" he yelled, sounding like a character from a bad Western movie. Little Aya's face got as red as his hair and he raged (for absolutely no reason).
"TAKATORI!!!"
Our dear sweet Little Aya then stabbed the horrid wolf ("Yuck! Blood!") and freed his REAL idiot of a grandmother from the closet (the grandmother who had no brains to try to open the door, but instead was only intent on cursing God the whole damn time). Little Aya felt that the wolf was actually better looking than his grandma, but we can't all have what we want, can we? Grandma Farfie gave a scream of delight as she saw the pool of crimson surrounding the wolf and began to sprinkle the blood all around the pedestal.
-NOTE: THIS SCENE HAS BEEN OMITTED DUE TO EXCESSIVE GORINESS-
---
And so the ending begins...
Little Aya was happily skipping in a field of flowers, enjoying the morning breeze, before --
"VROOM!!!"
A Porsche passed by and destroyed the beautiful daisies. The person in the car looked back and grinned a toothless sinister smirk before speeding away. Little Aya stared at the flowerless field.
"TAKATORI!!!"
Little did Little Aya know that his little 'TAKATORI' bellow attracted all the pretty little girls in the little area. Little. Lit-tle. Little.
"Look, Look! There he is! It's Little Red 'Shi-ne'-ing Katana! Let's go, girls!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
---