I am not J.K. Rowling or The Shangri-Las

I Can Never Go Home Anymore (to the tune of "I Can Never Go Home Anymore" by The Shangri-Las)-3

Narrator: Various

Setting: Just after Andromeda and Alphard Black's disowning

Andromeda rushes in and hugs Sirius, looking very distraught.

Andromeda: I've been kicked out; I've been disowned.

I've just run away.

Sirius pulls her face up to look into his.

Sirius (shocked): You, too?

Now you can never go home anymore.

Andromeda shakes him off.

Andromeda: But it's okay. Doesn't this sound familiar?

Sirius (beneath Andromeda): Oooh . . .

Andromeda: You go to school like they ask you,

But you're in the wrong House.

You hold dissimilar views,

But you keep quiet as a mouse.

Among your siblings, you're lonely;

Your family brings you no joy.

Then, for me, a miracle-

A boy.

And that's called "glad."

Now, my parents didn't approve,

Though I loved him with all my heart.

They said I wasn't to marry for love,

And the boy and I would have to part.

And no matter how I ranted and raved,

I screamed, I pleaded, I cried.

They told me if I married that Muggle-born,

They'd treat me as if I had died.

And that's called "bad."

Flashback of Bellatrix, Narcissa, and Andromeda's mother standing angrily over a cowering Andromeda.

The rest of the Black family, those not disowned (Andromeda's mother, Sirius's mother and father, Regulus, Bellatrix, and Narcissa): Never go home anymore . . .

Back to present; Andromeda continues to sing to Sirius.

Andromeda: That didn't happen to you, but I know this did:

I packed my clothes and left home today.

Of my whole family, only Dad begged me to stay.

And you know what he said?

He said he'd love my anyway.

Even if I married Ted,

He'd still sing to me and say:

Flashback of Alphard Black and Andromeda cuddled in her room, hugging each other, Andromeda crying.

Uncle Alphard: Hush, little baby,

Don't you cry.

Daddy loves you anyway . . .

Back to present. Andromeda covers her ears and shuts her eyes.

Andromeda: Daddy!

The Blacks, echoing in her head: You can never go home anymore . . .

Andromeda: Daddy!

I can never go home anymore . . .

Don't you get the feeling,

That love is more than family name?

I think so- Dad loves me just the same.

So I'll run away, too, Sirius;

I'm more if your friend,

And for loving you and me,

Even Daddy got kicked out in the end.

The Blacks: Never!

Andromeda sighs and leans against Sirius.

Andromeda: And I can never . . .

The Blacks: Never!

Andromeda: . . . go home anymore.

But it doesn't have to be "sad."