Katsu was painting.  He wasn't quite sure what the painting was going to turn out as, but that didn't bother him much.  He painted better when he didn't know.  It was easier when he wasn't trying for specifics.  Kijou had asked him why he didn't just paint what he wanted to paint, instead of whatever came out, and Katsu had explained to her, carefully and simply.  When he fixed a specific image in his head, the painting on paper never turned out as good as the image in his head.  If he concentrated more on the act of painting, and not the definite result, then he had very little expectations, and wasn't disappointed with the finished result.

She hadn't understood.

That was alright with Katsu – she didn't have to understand everything he did.  Yokuzoma-sensei had understood, but Yokuzoma-sensei had been an artist too.  It had been Yokuzoma-sensei who had first told Katsu not to expect other people to understand, and not to really bother trying to make them understand.  It was something you only understood if you were an artist, he had always said.  If you understood it, you needed no explanation, and if you didn't, all the explanations in the world couldn't make you.

He'd said as much to Kijou, but she hadn't appreciated it.  It was sweet, really, how close she wanted to be to him.  Katsu was touched – more than touched – but there were just some things that didn't need to be shared.  Some things were only for Katsu – and besides, Kijou was already closer to him than all but three people had ever been in his life.  That was another thing he didn't share with Kijou – no matter how he put it, she would never be happy with being told point-blank that she only ranked fourth place.

Katsu wanted Kijou to be happy.  She had already made him happier than he had been in a long time – why would he not want to return the favor?

Katsu smiled, and kept painting – noting in an offhand way that it was going to be a painting of foxes.

*********************************

Well.  Everyone who was waiting for this to come out, go over and visit Kuroiyousei's site, and tell her what a wonderful author she is, because she's the one who got me out of my slump.  There will be a new policy regarding my responses to all your lovely reviews, because the way I've been doing it so far is just impractical.  Responding to review is easily the most time-consuming part of the posting process, and while I haven't timed it, it would be a safe bet to say that it takes a minimum of half an hour to respond to everyone's review.  That's a half hour earlier I could have had the chapter up.  So, starting now, I will respond to reviews via private emails, unless you leave me no way of contacting you, or the review is of such nature that it demands a public response.  And I would really appreciate it if you just left me an address – it means a longer response, and it'll be a lot easier for me.  Okay?

….. and, since none of you guys left me an email address last time, I'll have to do it all the old way …..

Sunrise and Sunset: It's okay that you didn't review last time; everyone skips a few chapters here and there.  Just so long as you review occasionally.  ^__^  And thanks for the MoD … but I like my reviewers, and there isn't enough of them yet that I have to keep the back.  On the other hand ….. *bonks A LOT of sense into Sunset*  better?

dragoneyes: yup, this is all Kijou alright.  Well, someone she hired.  And, as I will point out later, she really does care about Katsu, and I'd even go so far as to say she loves him … she's just so warped and twisted she has a strange way of showing this.  As will also be expressed again later.  That straightjacket will be appreciated as soon as you can get it to me, though.  ^__^

blah: The end destination for this story?  Gettin' Katsu and Aoshi in the sack, of course.  I thought that was obvious.  :D  And, you'll be happy to know, we're almost finished with the flashback, and from there it will immediately go into the arc that will end the story.  So, we're getting there.  And, you are strangely accurate in your guess of what happened, as I have been hacking up phlegm for about three weeks now.  Oh, and, do you know what miso soup looks like?  Because that's what my puke looked like today.  Yes, you did need to know that.  :P