Author's Note: All right. This story's plot is becoming more and more stable (thank you, parrot, thank you! You can almost be considered a co-writer, the amount of ideas I get from you...THANK YOU!). It's moving a little slow, but action is going to happen soon enough. Just a few things that need to be taken care of first. Okay, more than a few. But action/angst soon! I left yet another sentence hanging last chapter. I HATE IT when I do that. I usually read things over thoroughly, but last chapter I just kind of blew off the editing. And whenever I do that, I making spelling/grammar mistakes. But at least I didn't leave an entire scene hanging. I've done that before, too. *shudders*


light*hope: Well I suppose that's better than another horendous chapter...j/k! Finally got back to you on GC...oy, my reviewing consistancy, well, it's non-existant. Glad you liked the "energy" comment, I like it myself. I think you shall be seeing all your suggestions come to life ;) Pop ups are no longer a problem, thank goodness. We got ad-blocking software. Which of course blocks my favorite, most reliable spoiler page, but you have take the good with the bad, lol. Spoilers aren't good for me anyway *tries to convince herself* Thanks for reading! Update GC super-soon if you haven't already. I must again make sure I haven't overlooked an update :p

starbright: I liked Carly thinking it was Elizabeth, too. And I can just see her repulsion at the thought. Thanks for reading like always! Always good to hear from you :D

Samara: Cliffhanger? Me? [face_innocent] It's so much fun to write dialogue. It's my favorite part and I'm glad I can make people laugh. It proves that I'm not the only one who laughs at my stuff :p Thanks for reading!

Lanz: Thanks so much for taking the time to review! I'm so glad you like and I hope you will continue to :)

theblondeone07: New chapter, coming on up just for you! Well, maybe not just for you, but you can enjoy it, hopefully, anyway, lol. Thanks for reading :D

Disclaimer: (yes another one) A majority of the dialogue in this chapter is directly excepted from General Hospital transcripts provided by the TV Megasite. It belongs to General Hospital, ABC, and whoever was writing for the show before Guza and Pratt. Unfortunately (wait, it is fortunate) Angel Ellis is a distant memory.

Chapter Eleven

Sometimes Sorry Isn't Enough

Time seemed to stop. Courtney felt like she had when she'd first seen him in the police station only last night. She could hardly breathe, it hurt so much, brought back so many memories, some good, some bad, but all painful. She didn't want to talk to him. She wasn't ready for it.

Mike spoke first taking a step closer. "Courtney." He said her name tentatively, as if asking for permission.

She took a deep, silent breath. She couldn't show what she felt. She had to act like it didn't bother her. She didn't want anyone to see how vulnerable she was. Especially not someone who didn't even know her, who probably still saw her as the innocent, ignorant twelve-year-old she used to be. She rose slowly. "Daddy. What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for you. I was going to ask around to see if anyone had seen you or met you, but I guess now I don't have to. There's so much I need to say."

Sonny scoffed. "Save it."

Mike ignored him, keeping his focus on Courtney. "You don't have to say anything. But I'd appreciate it if you listened." He was practically begging.

Courtney couldn't refuse. She crossed her arms over her chest, as much to appear tough and indifferent as to provide a shield for her heart. "Suppose it couldn't hurt."

Sonny leaned forward. "Mike's not going to say one thing to you that he hasn't already said to me, so let me give you the condensed version. He didn't mean to, it wasn't his fault, and he always loved you. Is that enough? Feel better now?"

No, she didn't. It made her feel horrible, because it was the truth, wasn't it? Mike hadn't cared. He hadn't cared enough to let her know he was alive. He hadn't cared enough to show up for her mother's funeral. He hadn't cared enough to be there for the last eight years of her life. But she wanted to hear him admit it. She wanted him to know what it had cost her...what it continued to cost her. She wanted him to know what she held him accountable for, what he was responsible for.

"Maybe I want to hear it from my father," she said smoothly.

Sonny held up his hands in defeat and sat back. Courtney had a feeling he was only going to shut up for so long. It'd only been a few minutes ago he'd told her that he had no use for Mike after what he'd done to her, and she doubted he'd changed his mind in that short a period. It was a horrible thing to say about your own father, but she couldn't help feeling a bit grateful. If this conversation plunged downhill, there was someone in the room on her side and her side only, whatever his reasons were.

Courtney sat down, and after a hesitant moment, Mike pulled out a chair himself. When it was clear Sonny wasn't going to try to stop him, at least not right away, Mike began his speach. "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry," Courtney echoed incredulously, hardly able to believe her ears.

"I am so sorry for not being the father I should have been, for letting you and your mother down," he exemplified.

It did nothing for Courtney. Suddenly, she was the child who was scoffing, but under her tough reaction disappointment creeped into her. "That's the best you can do?"

Mike sighed. "I know nothing I say is going to change what happened--"

Her temper flared. "Eight years you've let me think you were dead, and all you have to say is 'I'm sorry'?!"

Mike hung his head. "I thought you'd be better off without me."

Suddenly Courtney was on her feet again, gesturing angrily, emotionally. "So, what? You and Mom made an agreement? Tell me you were dead? Then we'd move some place where you'd never find me? Or did you know where I was and just never bothered to come see me?"

Mike turned toward her standing form, confusion written across his face. "Janine and I didn't have any agreement. When I came home and you were gone, it was like a knife in my heart."

That bit of information was like a knife in Courtney's own heart. This part wasn't his fault. She couldn't place the blame on both parents, shift it from one to the other, keeping it far away from the one who wasn't hear to explain or defend herself. No, it was that parent's fault. Her mother had lied. She had lied for years. How could you do that to me, Mom? "What did you do about it?"

"Nothing."

"So your family wasn't worth the effort to search for us?"

"I was confused and hurting, and the next thing I knew, I was back at the tables on a week-long binge. What can I tell you? The man that let his daughter go was a bum."

Sonny had been seething from the moment Mike had stepped into the room, but throughout the conversation that anger had grown. He refused to look at Mike. He focused only on his sister. "You know what, Courtney? Don't do this to yourself because he'll keep making excuses as long as you're willing to listen. That doesn't change anything. He is addicted to gambling, so whenever he's in the big game, everything else goes out the window...and that includes whichever child he promises to love that week!"

Courtney barely heard him, upset as she was. Couldn't Mike see? Didn't he have any idea how hurt she was? What gave him the idea that he could just say "I'm sorry" and make everything disappear?

"You know, I did horribly in ballet that day," she began calmly, the emotion just barely under the surface. "I kept looking at the other parents and wondering where you were. I remember walking in the house, and there were boxes everywhere. The pictures I made and the flowers the lady down the street would give me were all gone. Mom was in the kitchen and she should have been getting ready for work. I knew something was wrong. I knew something had happened to you, and she looked me right in the eye and she told me that you were gone. And I didn't believe her." She felt the tears coming. She tried to stop them by taking deep breaths even as she spoke. "I kept crying and screaming, 'You're lying! Daddy's not dead! He's going to be here! He's going to come through that door any second now and say he's sorry he didn't make it to my ballet class!' But we left and you never came and I cried myself to sleep every night after that. I was sure Mom was telling the truth because my daddy called me 'sunshine' and he took me to the park and to the movies and he laughed with me and he read me books and bought me my favorite stuffed bear and came to my ballet class every weekend. My daddy would never leave me because he loved me!" Courtney's voice had been gaining momentum and she practically yelled the last part. She pointed to her chest. "I knew that in my heart." She laughed, sniffing as she did so. "But I was wrong."

"Dear God, I am so sorry." And Mike really did look sorry. She almost had him in tears. But she didn't care. Niether did Sonny.

"Get out." Courtney had never heard so much barely contained fury forced into two softly spoken words.

"Don't do this, Michael. Let me talk to her. Let me explain."

Who did her father think he was? What was he doing, asking her brother permission to explain? Didn't he have the guts to come out and ask her for the chance himself?

"Get out, Mike!"

Mike turned his eyes to his daughter. "Please, Courtney."

She backed away. "You know what? Get away from me. Stay away from me. Just leave me alone!" As she shouted the last part, she backed into the doors. And then she pushed through them and started running, everyone in the restaurant staring after her, including Elizabeth, who stood behind the counter with an arched eyebrow .

Courtney was gone. There was nothing standing between Sonny and tearing into Mike. "You know what you are, Mike? Huh?"

"What, Michael?" Mike demanded in a defiant sort of tone.

"Do you know what you are?"

"Go ahead, tell me, Michael. What am I?"

"You're a hypocrite! You're mad at me because I let you think I was dead for a couple weeks. You have been dead to your own daughter for eight years!"

"That's not how it—"

Sonny's hand sliced through the air. "I don't want to hear it!" He stood up. "I am done with your excuses."

Mike got up with him and once again tried to explain himself. "Look, I don't blame you for how you feel about me, Michael. But this isn't the way to punish me. Yeah, I walked out on you both and that was wrong. I know that. But it's not right for you to try to keep me away from Courtney now. You may be her brother, but I am still her father."

Sonny shook his head. "It's too late, Mike."

"No, it's not."

"Yeah, it's too late. You know what I'm saying? You've been--ever since you got to Port Charles, I've cleaned up your mess. And I'm going to clean this one up, too. But after that, you and I are finished." With those words hanging in the air, Sonny turned and left.

~*~

Carly and Michael had finally taken their leave. She had Club 101 to run, and Michael had a play date. The only reason he wasn't gone yet was the phone call that had come in just as they were leaving. He was still clearing up the details when he spotted Courtney running down the steps into the park. She stopped to catch her breath, which wasn't coming easily because she was crying. She wrapped her arms around herself. She wasn't wearing a coat. She was going to kill herself if she kept this up.

"There's something I need to take care of. Call me when it's done, all right Benny?" Jason said abruptly, cutting Benny off in the middle of a sentence about the Puerto Rican numbers.

After the lengthy conversation, Benny seemed a little surprised over the abrupt ending. "I'll do that," he said, though Jason barely caught it as he lowered the phone so fast.

"Courtney!" he called to her.

She whirled around as he approached. "My brother put you up to this, didn't he?" she demanded.

~*~

P.S. We're pretending Jax didn't give Club 101 to Skye and Sonny bought it off of Jax...k? ;) Being in 2002 can be awfully annoying at times.