Title: I'll Be

Author: AbayJ

Couple: Carly and Courtney (Yes slash, don't like that, don't read it.) Hints of CarSon and Journey.

Genre: Angast/Hints of Romance/Complete/Songfic/Short.

Archive: Just Ask.

Rating: R (STRONG R!)

Disclaimer: I own nuttin. Song is Goo Goo Dolls I'll Be

Summery: Carly and Courtney turn to each other when their lives fall apart. Following curtain story line.

A/N: FLAMES WILL BE IGNORED. If you don't like slash, don't read it, it is as easy as that. For all that R/R. Thank you. It means a lot to me. ( LOL sometimes even the flames, at least I know it was read.)

Key: Lyrics.

The strands in your eyes
That color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
Emeralds from mountains
Thrust towards the sky
Never revealing their depth

She looked at her best friend, the words rolling out of her mouth, Jason wasn't the father of Sam's baby. Sonny was. The man she loved with all her heart had lied to her. Her best friend, the man that was like a brother to her had lied to her. Letting the wet drops of salt water roll down her cheeks she watched as the same thing rolled down her friend cheeks.

Feeling two arms enclose her into a close hug, and she let the sobs she had been holding back go. For minutes or hours, neither one was sure. Sure how long they stayed in each other arms, and neither one knew when the platonic hug turned into something more. Turned into something that neither suspected. When they pulled each other closer, pulled each other into a passionate kiss. Their lips demanding, their hands exploring curves that were familiar to the eyes but not to the touch.

For one-second they pulled away, brown eyes meeting blue eyes. Looking deep. Searching. Trying to find an answer to what was going on. But then the brunette pulled the blonde back to her lips, her tongue asking permission to enter, to taste her lips. Her mouth. Soon hands were undoing clothing, pulling it away from their bodies.

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated,
I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows
Of heartache that hang from above
I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

Their hands touched. Their lips fused. Touching anywhere they could reach. Teeth nipping. Lips sucking. Hands playing. Soon their screams of ecstasy was the only sounds in the room and the lay in each other arms. Neither of them looking at each other, neither of them sure where this came from. How it happened.

The one spoke, not loud, a soft whisper. "What did we do?"

The brunette responded, in the same whisper her hands shaking as it pulled away from the blonde. Scared to admit what had happened. Scared to admit what they had just did. "I don't know."

And she didn't, she didn't know what had happened. Why they had made love, why they had become so intimate. So in tune with each other bodies. When they became lovers and should they act on their instincts and repeat it. Standing up the brunette reach for her clothes and the blonde did the same. Their backs to each other.

Rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
You're my survival
You're my living proof
My love is alive and not dead
Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated
I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows
Of heartache that hang from above

Carly stood first and looked at the blondes still naked back and felt a pang of want. She wanted Courtney again. The man she loved sister. Her sister-in-law. She wanted her again. Her hands had a mind of her own as she traced the path of her spine. Traced the butterfly on the lower back of her new lover. Then her lips followed the same path and her heart broke as the she pulled away from the kiss. Her shirt forgotten in her hurry to stand up. Her full breast naked to Carly's eyes. Tears falling from her red eyes and her voice shaky as she spoke. The room took a cold feel to it to Carly, goose bumps popped out on her arms and the hair on her neck stood up. "Carly I love Jason.......but with you.....my God."

"I know," Carly responded in the same shaky voice. She could loose herself in Courtney. Unlike with Sonny. With Sonny she felt pain, hurt, and anger. But with Courtney she felt nothing but love and ecstasy. How was that? Was she gay now? Was Courtney?

"Then what do we do?" Courtney asked as she slipped on her shirt and sat down to her best friend. Her most intimate friend.

I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life
I've dropped out
Burned up
Fought my way back from the dead
Tuned in
Turned on
Remembered the things you said

"We keep being there for each other, we don't have to be lovers, or we could. But Courtney I can't loose you," the brunette said as she let her hand travel the length of Courtney cheek and she felt happiness fill her as Courtney leaned into her hand.

The lips leaned in and they kissed softly. Then they parted. "I can't loose you either."

They lips found each other again. Their passion taking them over again.

They laid in the after glow of their love making and looked each other over. It was Courtney first to speak again. "I love Jason Carly."

"I love Sonny," they pulled away and got dress. Knowing what they had to do. Knowing that they couldn't let this become more. Only one night.

After they parted with a sweet, tender kiss they both knew it would be more. When the pain got to be to much they both knew they would turn to each other. To get loss in each other.

I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life
I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of you life