Title: Honesty
Author: AbayJ
Genre: Romance/Angast/Sweet/Short/Completed/Songfic
Rating: PG/PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing, the song belongs too Rodney Atkins.
Summery: Journey talks about their divorce
A/N: Thanks to Lingling for betaing this for me! Thanks so much girl, I love what you do for my stories. I hope all who reads likes it! Please leave feedback :)
Jason walked into Kelly's, spotting her out immediately. Her hair was up in a beautiful bun and had a few tendrils escaping. He had smiled to himself but than it faded away when saw the blue papers. Sighing he walked over to the table where she was sitting and sat down, looking her over at a closer angle. She had red rimmed eyes, her neat bun wasn't all that neat, and her clothes not all that pressed. Sighing he noticed she looked just like him, if not worse. "Courtney," pulling her out of her thoughts she looked at him, a little startled.
"Jason, um hi, I didn't......um didn't expect you so soon," she ushered her hand to the chair in front of her, "please sit, we need to talk."
"Yeah we do," he sat and looked her in the eye. Her eyes were watery, and he felt like she did. Like she didn't know what he wanted. Part of him knew he had to let her go, and not just for Sonny but for her. Then another part of him knew that they belonged together that they would always need each other. Sighing, he leaned back. "Courtney, you can take whatever you want, I don't really care, just write me list okay."
"I don't want anything Jason, what I wanted died a long time ago," she always sighed, the need to cry overcoming her but she kept her cool.
He said, Just think it over,
and write me a list
So we can figure out what we both deserve
She hardly could believe it,
that their love had come to this
Dividing an deciding his and hers
reaching for a napkin and asked the waitress for a pen
An one by one she wrote down what she wanted most from him
"Courtney.........if--if I could go back in time, I would change what happened to our baby, I would have listened to you," touching his head, sincerity in his eyes, if there was only one thing he could changed in his past, it wouldn't be the accident, it wouldn't be going to Sonny, it wouldn't be his relationships, and it wouldn't be his past Courtney. It would be to go back and listen to Courtney about their baby, to protect what they had.
"J--jason yeah the loss of our baby....that hurt........but not as much as loosing you, I knew that your loyalty to Sonny came first but for on--once I thou--thought that I would come first.......but I didn't," he looked up at her shocked.
"Courtney, that's not true........you have always came first with me, always," he grabbed her hand and put a piece of paper in her hand. "Just write down what you want."
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust
A little less time for the rest of the world
And more for the two of us
Kisses each mornin'
I love you's at night
Just like it used to be
The way life was when you were in love with me
She nodded and took the paper, and wrote down the three things she wanted most from him: Some time for us, and only us. Just being with me.......without a third party. And maybe a little less time for your loyalty. Getting up she put that in front of him folded up and walked out of the diner, the tears to much to handle. She walked back to loft and laid on their bed, his pillow had yet to be washed, and it still smelled of him. Holding her close to her chest she kissed the pillowcase.
Jason opened the folded paper when he got to his penthouse, not sure he could have controlled his emotions at Kelly's enough to read this. He opened the paper and looked at his, his tears began to fall, knowing all the things she wanted was what she deserved and he could give them too her, getting up, he grabbed his jacket. But first he needed to clear up something with his boss, something that had been in the plan for a long time. Knocking on the door. When Sonny opened him, he gave Jason a once over, "Hey, what you need."
"Sonny.......I'm sorry but I can't do this anymore, I can't pretend Courtney doesn't mean anything to me, I can't do it. IF yo want to fire fine, I just have to be with her Sonny. She's my heart, she's my soul, she's my love, and she's my friend," walking away from the door, going to the elevator he waited for the shouts that he was fire. But they didn't come......and if they had he must have been already in the elevator.
She reached across the table and placed it in his hand
And said, You know this ain't easy for me
As he thought about the new car the house and the land
And wondered what that bottom line would be
An a thousand other things that she's wanted him to leave behind
But he never dreamed he'd open up that napkin and find
Courtney heard the knock on her door at midnight, hours after she had left Kelly's.....and her marriage. Her eyes had never been more puffy and watery, she felt like dying but she knew she couldn't do that, even if it felt like her heart was already dead. Even at 12, she wasn't tired, opening the door, her face went pale at the sight of him. Not sure if she should be happy or upset. "Jason what are you doing here?"
He looked at her, her face was pale and puffy, only in her pink terry cloth bathrobe and pink bunny slippers. She looked so vulnerable and he felt like he could kick himself, knowing it was he that had put there. His eyes started to tear up and he pulled her into his arms, he couldn't wait anymore, it had been so long that she had been close to him. "Courtney, I want to make a promise to you, right now, that I will be here.......I told Sonny I will not let you go, I can't. I love you to much and I am tired of pretending that we weren't mean to be and this time I am not going to let you go this time, no matter what."
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust
A little less time for the rest of the world
And more for the two of us
Kisses each morning'
I love you's at night
Just like it used to be
The way life was when you were in love with me
Not sure if she could believe his words or not, not sure if she took take them at heart because if he did and he changed his mind again, this time she might not stop to think before killing herself. Her heart had so many scares and if wouldn't take much more to break it completely. If it was true, you could die of a broken heart, she should have been dead by now but then again maybe with one more crack she would be. She looked up at him, her heart filling with all she had to give this man, opening her heart again with him, kissing him softly. "Don't close me out again Jason, I am opening my heart up again......please don't close it for me again. I don't think I would be able to open again if you did," he kissed her, his lips stopping her words. Licking the seam of her lips and moved her into the room.
"I won't, I couldn't Courtney, not again," touching her hair, he gave a smile, "I will love you forever." Soon he was opening the neck of her robe and looked at wedding rings, and unfastened the necklace and pulled the rings off the necklace. Taking them in his hand, he took her left hand in his. "Will you wear my rings again, will you be Mrs. Courtney Morgan?"
Her tears fell and she nodded her head, "I want that more than anything else," he pulled her into a kiss as he slipped the ring on her finger. "I love you Jason Morgan."
"I Love you too Mrs. Morgan," he moved her to the bed, kissing her the entire way.
Well, he fought back the tears as he looked in her eyes
And said, Everything on that list in your hand
Is hidden somewhere in your heart
Honestly, sincerity just like it used to be
The way life was when you were in love with me