Chapter 10
"Can't I go to the hospital to see Ryan?" Seth questions, "I could go back to school tomorrow."
"No," Kirsten responds. "Besides isn't today Anna's first day back?"
"Well...yeah...but..." Seth trails off as Anna comes into the kitchen.
"Seth, you ready to go?" Anna questions.
"Yeah," Seth sighs grabbing his bag, "what about a half day?"
"No," Kirsten responds, "go to school. You can go to the hospital after school, I'm taking Ryan over after lunch."
"You know with everyone hanging all around it's going to make him feel overcrowded," Seth points out.
"Seth, we have to go," Anna states, "we promised Marissa we would pick her up."
"Alright, bye Mom," Seth leans over Aurora's baby carrier, "by Rory." With his words Seth plants a kiss on her forehead.
"Hey guys," Marissa greets when she gets into the car minutes later. "So I have a favor."
"What's up?" Anna questions.
"So I was wondering if you guys could help me move into my dad's new house?"
"You're moving back in with your dad?" Seth asks.
Marissa nods, "he talked to Caleb last night and arranged it all. He and Hailey are going house hunting this morning and he has a meeting with your dad to talk about restaurant stuff this afternoon. Ryan's going to get out of the hospital and things are going to be perfect."
"Here, here," Seth holds his Starbucks cup up to Marissa's reflection in the rearview mirror.
"Stop thinking about it," Kirsten orders herself, staring fiercely in the bathroom mirror as she roughly pulls her hair into a pony tail.
"Talking to yourself again?" Sandy asks coming into the bathroom with Aurora cradled in his arms.
Kirsten nods, "yeah, you know me. I'm turning into Seth."
"Are you still worried about not having a job?" Sandy asks.
"Yeah, that's..." Kirsten nods, "yeah."
"Well I may have found your solution, you can always manage whatever new restaurant Jimmy and I open."
Kirsten nods, "yeah, I guess that's a possibility. Shouldn't you be getting to work? You're going to be late."
Sandy turns around and peers into the bedroom at the clock, "you're right. Listen I'll be late in getting home since I'm taking a long lunch to look at restaurants with Jimmy, so I have to work late and then I'm going to stop and see Ryan before visiting hours are over. I'll probably have to drag Seth home then, want me to pick up dinner on the way?"
Kirsten nods, "yeah, sure."
"Have anything in mind?"
Kirsten shakes her head, "whatever you and Seth decide. Ask Marissa and Anna if they want to stay for dinner too, I'm sure home isn't exactly fun for Marissa right now. I can't believe Jimmy told Dad that he's taking Marissa back. The poor girl, she must feel like an object, it's sad. But she'll be happy living with Jimmy and Hailey." Kirsten cringes, "I can't believe my sister is marrying Jimmy. And Marissa's going to be my step-sister and my step-niece." Kirsten shakes her head again, "my brain just can process all of this. I love you, have a good day."
Sandy kisses Aurora before placing her in Kirsten's arms and in turn kissing Kirsten, "I love you too."
"How are you feeling?" Kirsten asks walking into Ryan's room with Aurora's baby carrier in his hands.
"Like I get asked that way to much," Ryan retorts.
"I'm sorry," Kirsten nods. "Look who's awake on her visit to Daddy this time."
When Ryan looks at Aurora he still wears the awed expression that he had the day before, "can I hold her?"
"Ryan, she's your daughter, of course you can hold her." Kirsten quickly responds, setting the carrier on the open chair she gently lifts Aurora out. "Do you know how to hold a baby?"
Ryan nods, "we baby sat Theresa's baby cousins a lot."
"Good," Kirsten nods settling Aurora into Ryan's ready arms. Once Aurora is settled there she pulls out her camera quickly snapping pictures of the first time Aurora's father holds her.
"She's so little," Ryan breathes. "I feel like if I move I'll break her."
"You won't," Kirsten assures. "Seth's held her and she's not broken. She looks like you, you know."
"You think?" Ryan asks after a long pause. "That's funny, because I was just thinking that she looks like Theresa."
"Ryan, I'm so sorry about what happened." As far as Kirsten knows this is the first time anyone has spoken to Ryan about Theresa.
Ryan's eyes lock onto Kirsten's an he admits, "I know I should be sad...But it's just really hard. I mean, part of me is sad and angry that Eddie could do that." Ryan shakes his head hard as if to rid himself of the anger, "but a part of me can't help but be happy that Aurora is healthy and that I'm alive to see that. I wish with everything that Theresa could be here with me but that sadness is outweighed by..."
"The joy of being a parent," Kirsten fills in for Ryan. And at Ryan's nod she continues, "I know what you mean. Did you know Seth was a huge surprise?" Ryan shakes his head and Kirsten continues, "yup. A big surprise that I have to say I didn't want, I loved my job and I loved the freedom Sandy and I had without kids...But the first time I held Seth I knew that all the bad things I could think of that involved being a parent couldn't cancel out what an amazing experience it is to be a parent. With you it was the same way." Kirsten swallows hard, "we both know that I didn't want to let you into my family but Ryan you are as much a part of this family..." The lump in Kirsten's throat chokes her up but the look in Ryan's eyes tells her that he understands.
Taking a deep breath Kirsten continues, "Ryan, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like you weren't a part of our family. I never meant to and I'm ashamed that left you in that stupid pool house for so long. But I want you to know that I love you and I may not have given birth to you but you're my son and that's not going to change." At the completion of her speech Ryan looks down and she knows for the gesture that he's trying to hide whatever emotion he is feeling.
"I'm going to go for a walk," Kirsten states. "Let you and Aurora have some private time. Are you okay with her?"
"Yeah, thank you." When Ryan speaks his words are rough.
"I'll be back in a couple of minutes." Kirsten states softly before slipping out of the hospital room.
Ryan stares down at the tiny baby in his arms, "so it looks like we're not going to be all alone, huh, Aurora?" Ryan let's Aurora grip his finger, "I'm going to take care of you like a parent is supposed too. My own childhood was screwed up, but yours won't be, because your grandparents, the Cohens, they taught me what it's like to be a real family. And you're going to have that, and that includes your Uncle Seth. Don't worry, you'll get used to him, it just takes a little while."
"Can't I go to the hospital to see Ryan?" Seth questions, "I could go back to school tomorrow."
"No," Kirsten responds. "Besides isn't today Anna's first day back?"
"Well...yeah...but..." Seth trails off as Anna comes into the kitchen.
"Seth, you ready to go?" Anna questions.
"Yeah," Seth sighs grabbing his bag, "what about a half day?"
"No," Kirsten responds, "go to school. You can go to the hospital after school, I'm taking Ryan over after lunch."
"You know with everyone hanging all around it's going to make him feel overcrowded," Seth points out.
"Seth, we have to go," Anna states, "we promised Marissa we would pick her up."
"Alright, bye Mom," Seth leans over Aurora's baby carrier, "by Rory." With his words Seth plants a kiss on her forehead.
"Hey guys," Marissa greets when she gets into the car minutes later. "So I have a favor."
"What's up?" Anna questions.
"So I was wondering if you guys could help me move into my dad's new house?"
"You're moving back in with your dad?" Seth asks.
Marissa nods, "he talked to Caleb last night and arranged it all. He and Hailey are going house hunting this morning and he has a meeting with your dad to talk about restaurant stuff this afternoon. Ryan's going to get out of the hospital and things are going to be perfect."
"Here, here," Seth holds his Starbucks cup up to Marissa's reflection in the rearview mirror.
"Stop thinking about it," Kirsten orders herself, staring fiercely in the bathroom mirror as she roughly pulls her hair into a pony tail.
"Talking to yourself again?" Sandy asks coming into the bathroom with Aurora cradled in his arms.
Kirsten nods, "yeah, you know me. I'm turning into Seth."
"Are you still worried about not having a job?" Sandy asks.
"Yeah, that's..." Kirsten nods, "yeah."
"Well I may have found your solution, you can always manage whatever new restaurant Jimmy and I open."
Kirsten nods, "yeah, I guess that's a possibility. Shouldn't you be getting to work? You're going to be late."
Sandy turns around and peers into the bedroom at the clock, "you're right. Listen I'll be late in getting home since I'm taking a long lunch to look at restaurants with Jimmy, so I have to work late and then I'm going to stop and see Ryan before visiting hours are over. I'll probably have to drag Seth home then, want me to pick up dinner on the way?"
Kirsten nods, "yeah, sure."
"Have anything in mind?"
Kirsten shakes her head, "whatever you and Seth decide. Ask Marissa and Anna if they want to stay for dinner too, I'm sure home isn't exactly fun for Marissa right now. I can't believe Jimmy told Dad that he's taking Marissa back. The poor girl, she must feel like an object, it's sad. But she'll be happy living with Jimmy and Hailey." Kirsten cringes, "I can't believe my sister is marrying Jimmy. And Marissa's going to be my step-sister and my step-niece." Kirsten shakes her head again, "my brain just can process all of this. I love you, have a good day."
Sandy kisses Aurora before placing her in Kirsten's arms and in turn kissing Kirsten, "I love you too."
"How are you feeling?" Kirsten asks walking into Ryan's room with Aurora's baby carrier in his hands.
"Like I get asked that way to much," Ryan retorts.
"I'm sorry," Kirsten nods. "Look who's awake on her visit to Daddy this time."
When Ryan looks at Aurora he still wears the awed expression that he had the day before, "can I hold her?"
"Ryan, she's your daughter, of course you can hold her." Kirsten quickly responds, setting the carrier on the open chair she gently lifts Aurora out. "Do you know how to hold a baby?"
Ryan nods, "we baby sat Theresa's baby cousins a lot."
"Good," Kirsten nods settling Aurora into Ryan's ready arms. Once Aurora is settled there she pulls out her camera quickly snapping pictures of the first time Aurora's father holds her.
"She's so little," Ryan breathes. "I feel like if I move I'll break her."
"You won't," Kirsten assures. "Seth's held her and she's not broken. She looks like you, you know."
"You think?" Ryan asks after a long pause. "That's funny, because I was just thinking that she looks like Theresa."
"Ryan, I'm so sorry about what happened." As far as Kirsten knows this is the first time anyone has spoken to Ryan about Theresa.
Ryan's eyes lock onto Kirsten's an he admits, "I know I should be sad...But it's just really hard. I mean, part of me is sad and angry that Eddie could do that." Ryan shakes his head hard as if to rid himself of the anger, "but a part of me can't help but be happy that Aurora is healthy and that I'm alive to see that. I wish with everything that Theresa could be here with me but that sadness is outweighed by..."
"The joy of being a parent," Kirsten fills in for Ryan. And at Ryan's nod she continues, "I know what you mean. Did you know Seth was a huge surprise?" Ryan shakes his head and Kirsten continues, "yup. A big surprise that I have to say I didn't want, I loved my job and I loved the freedom Sandy and I had without kids...But the first time I held Seth I knew that all the bad things I could think of that involved being a parent couldn't cancel out what an amazing experience it is to be a parent. With you it was the same way." Kirsten swallows hard, "we both know that I didn't want to let you into my family but Ryan you are as much a part of this family..." The lump in Kirsten's throat chokes her up but the look in Ryan's eyes tells her that he understands.
Taking a deep breath Kirsten continues, "Ryan, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like you weren't a part of our family. I never meant to and I'm ashamed that left you in that stupid pool house for so long. But I want you to know that I love you and I may not have given birth to you but you're my son and that's not going to change." At the completion of her speech Ryan looks down and she knows for the gesture that he's trying to hide whatever emotion he is feeling.
"I'm going to go for a walk," Kirsten states. "Let you and Aurora have some private time. Are you okay with her?"
"Yeah, thank you." When Ryan speaks his words are rough.
"I'll be back in a couple of minutes." Kirsten states softly before slipping out of the hospital room.
Ryan stares down at the tiny baby in his arms, "so it looks like we're not going to be all alone, huh, Aurora?" Ryan let's Aurora grip his finger, "I'm going to take care of you like a parent is supposed too. My own childhood was screwed up, but yours won't be, because your grandparents, the Cohens, they taught me what it's like to be a real family. And you're going to have that, and that includes your Uncle Seth. Don't worry, you'll get used to him, it just takes a little while."