Hey you guys! I'm back! Back to write yet another chapter! Some of you were concerned that it was my last chapter last time. ?? I don't know where you got that idea but no, it's not true. I've got many chapters to go before this is over. Like I said, it's not a first season fanfic 'til someone gets brainwashed.
Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.
Warnings: Kind of fluffy. But there's a point to it.
Close Your Eyes (I'm so tired I wrote 'Second Chances'.)
Chapter Eleven
I miss you…forgive me…
She squeezed her eyes shut, tears coming out like water as she tried to shut everything else out. She didn't want to think about everything she had done up to this moment. She didn't want to think about all the things she had left behind.
Selfish…childish…so many names they've called me already.
And it's true.
But I can't do this anymore.
Some things…I cannot fake…I'm here…
Please…please…don't look at me with those eyes again.
I can't forgive myself when you do.
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"How's dinner going?" Usagi came into the kitchen where her mother was cooking dinner. "It smells sooo good! I'm hungry!"
"You'll have to wait." Ikuko smiled at her daughter's antics. "You know that."
"I know." Usagi sighed. "When's he going to be here?"
"Probably when you asked him to be." Ikuko looked at the clock. "It's almost seven o' clock."
"I've been waiting all day." Usagi looked miserable as she propped her head against her chin. "Is otou-san really okay with it?"
"I'm sure your father would much rather know the boy you're dating then have you dating some stranger." Ikuko spoke comfortingly. "I can't wait to meet this Mamoru that I've heard so much about."
"He's really nice okaa-san!" Usagi said for the thousandth time. "There were times when I didn't think so but that was before…" She blushed.
"I'm sure he is." Ikuko couldn't help smiling at her daughter's obvious feelings for the boy. "You haven't changed yet."
"Oh no!" Usagi ran out of the room and up the stairs. A few minutes later she came back down in a cute white sundress that came down to her knees. She was happily skipping when the doorbell rang.
She rushed towards it and stopped before to smooth her dress and pat her hair. Then she reached out and opened the door. Mamoru was standing there looking a little embarrassed and holding a bouquet of yellow roses.
"Mamoru!" Usagi exclaimed happily and gave him a hug. "Are those for me?"
"Actually, they're for your mom." Mamoru told her. "You know, sort of a present for letting me come over for dinner."
"Awww…that's so sweet." Usagi looked at him dreamily. "Come in, come in!" Mamoru came in and after taking off his shoes, they went into the living room where Shingo was playing video games.
"Is that guy you've been gushing over all day here yet?" Shingo asked, obviously having sensed another presence in the room but not taking his eyes off the screen. Usagi's face reddened as she got mad.
"I have not been gushing!" Usagi protested and threw a pillow at the back of Shingo's head. He messed up on his game and ended up losing.
"USAGI!" Shingo turned around, throwing the pillow without really looking. It hit Mamoru in the face. Shingo looked mortified when he realized he had hit someone else.
"Shingo!" Usagi put her hands on her hips. "Look what you did!"
"You started it!" Shingo stuck his tongue out. Mamoru started laughing and the two of them stopped to stare at him.
"He's just like you." Mamoru finally got out.
"I'm nothing like him!" Usagi insisted.
"I'm nothing like her!" Shingo spat out at the same time.
"Here's your pillow." Mamoru handed it to Usagi who blushed and put it on the couch. "You must be Usagi's little brother."
"Yeah." Shingo eyed him suspiciously. "Who's this dork?"
"This is Chiba Mamoru." Usagi introduced him, practically hissing through her teeth. "He's our guest!"
"Oh, so you're the guy she's been gushing over all day." Shingo looked at him curiously and then moved closer before holding out his hand. "I'm Usagi's younger brother, Shingo."
"It's nice to meet you Shingo." Mamoru shook the younger boy's hand.
"My sister's a walking disaster area and she's not very smart." Shingo went on. "But you can date her if you want."
"SHINGO!" Usagi screeched indignantly. Mamoru laughed once more and reached out to give her hand a comforting squeeze.
"Do you have any sisters?" Shingo asked Mamoru.
"No, I don't." Mamoru replied.
"You got off lucky." Shingo blew his bangs out of his eyes. Usagi looked like she might explode any moment. "Do you play video games?"
"I've never really tried." Mamoru admitted.
"You've never played video games before?" Shingo looked scandalized. Then he got a superior look. "That's okay, I can teach you."
"Usagi? Is your friend here?" Ikuko called out from the kitchen.
"Yes!" Usagi called back. "Come on Mamoru, come meet my mom." Then went from the living room into the kitchen where Ikuko was still cooking. She stopped immediately when she saw Mamoru.
"I'm Usagi's mother; you can call me Ikuko if you want to." Ikuko gave him a welcoming smile.
"I'm Chiba Mamoru; I'm very pleased to meet you." Mamoru bowed a little and then held out the flowers. "I brought these for you." Ikuko flushed with delight. "I can see where Usagi gets all her good looks." He smiled charmingly.
"Oh these are too beautiful!" Ikuko giggled. "What a gentleman! Usagi, you've found a very good man, I can already tell." Then she took the flowers and went about putting them in a vase. Usagi and Mamoru were both red. "It's going to be a little while before dinner's ready. Usagi, if you could just set the table? And Mamoru, why don't you sit in the living room with Shingo?"
"He promised to teach me how to play video games." Mamoru nodded his head. "I don't want to get in the way of what I'm sure is going to be a delicious meal." Ikuko got a small pleased smile on her face. As soon as Mamoru had been ushered out into the living room she turned towards Usagi.
"He's a keeper Usagi." Ikuko told her daughter outright. "What a charming young man!"
"I'm glad you like him okaa-san." Usagi smiled brightly.
"Your father is going to love him." Ikuko put a hand on her heart. "Just you wait."
"I don't know…" Usagi bit her lip. "Otou-san is a little weird sometimes about stuff like that…"
"Don't you worry. All fathers are over-protective." Ikuko remembered her own over-protective father.
"Okay." Usagi nodded and then got to work setting the table. It wasn't long before she was done and then a few minutes later, so was her mother so Usagi went to the living room to get Mamoru and Shingo while Ikuko went to bring her husband to the table.
As she was about to go in, she stopped to watch the two.
"No, no, you've got to accelerate around the corners." Shingo showed Mamoru on his controller. "See? Otherwise you'll lose 'em."
"I see." Mamoru went to do just that on the video game and ended up crashing his car. "Whoops. I'm afraid I'm not very good."
"That's okay; I think you just need practice." Shingo told him wisely. "One more time, okay?"
"Alright." Mamoru agreed.
"It'll have to wait." Usagi came into the room. "We're having dinner now."
"Oh man!" Shingo seemed disappointed. "You should see this guy Usagi, he sucks at this game."
"I only ever play that crane game at the arcade and it's not that often." Mamoru rubbed his nose cutely and Usagi smiled fondly. "Let's eat." The three went into the kitchen to have a peaceful meal.
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Well, they wanted a peaceful meal but Kenji seemed dead set against it. He was sitting there, glaring at Mamoru who had politely introduced himself. Ikuko kept glaring at Kenji and changing to give Mamoru reassuring looks.
"So…what do you think you'll choose as a career?" Kenji fired the question at Mamoru who quickly tried to answer.
"I'm studying to be a doctor. But I'm not positive." Mamoru answered truthfully. "A lot of other fields interest me as well."
"A doctor…" Kenji seemed to approve of this.
"That sounds wonderful." Ikuko nodded happily. "Does it taste alright Mamoru?"
"It's delicious." Mamoru seemed to relax a little. "Best I've ever had."
"Oh that can't be true." Ikuko was pink with pleasure. "I'm sure your own mother is a much better cook." Usagi glanced at Mamoru seriously. She hadn't told her parents that Mamoru was an orphan. Truthfully she hadn't told anyone. Mamoru didn't say anything, he just continued to eat.
"What do your parents do?" Kenji asked as he shot Mamoru another deadly look. Mamoru choked on his rice.
"I…don't have parents." Mamoru finally answered, looking down at his plate. Usagi patted his arm with her hand.
"Oh that's terrible!" Ikuko put a hand to her chest.
"Mamoru's an orphan. His parents died in a car crash when he was very little." Usagi explained helpfully.
"How awful for you Mamoru." Ikuko was gazing at the young man with sympathetic eyes.
"It's okay." Mamoru gave her a smile. "I was diagnosed with amnesia; I don't have any memories before I woke up from the crash so I don't remember them at all."
"I still can't imagine how that must have been for you." Ikuko sent a look towards Kenji who was looking a little uncomfortable as he was the one who had brought the whole thing up.
"Well…what are you intentions towards my daughter?" Kenji changed the subject quickly.
"Otou-san!" Usagi looked at him with wide blue eyes.
"Kenji, really." Ikuko sent her husband a look.
"What?" Kenji asked, looking as though the whole world was against him. "I was just asking, and as a father, it's my right to ask."
"My intentions towards your daughter?" Mamoru looked Kenji square in the eyes. "I intend to love her." Usagi felt her breathe catch and her heart fluttered a little.
He intends to love me!
But what happens…when the princess comes?
Will she take you away from me?
And will you say the same thing about her?
"That's good then." Kenji's mouth was set in a firm line. "I think Usagi's too young for—"
"KENJI!" Ikuko slammed a hand down on the table, effectively cutting him off. "Kitchen. Now."
The two went into the kitchen and the sounds of Ikuko scolding Kenji came through to the kitchen. Shingo, Usagi, and Mamoru were looking at each other with perplexed expressions.
"I'm so glad she's not mad at me." Shingo said and the others agreed. The two came back in and Kenji seemed subdued and quietly ate his dinner. Ikuko looked very prim and proper. She gathered up the dishes and then got dessert.
"Why don't you take your desserts outside? It's such a nice evening." Ikuko suggested to Mamoru and Usagi.
"Okay." Usagi and Mamoru got up and took their desserts outside where they sat on the porch swing with their lemon meringue pie.
It was a nice evening, the sun was setting in the distance and the sky was a swirl of colors as it went down. The wind blew a light breeze and Usagi thought it was probably the nicest day they'd have for awhile.
She ate but as she did, she felt weighed down by thinking about the princess and her and Mamoru.
Mamoru said he'd love you for now…but he doesn't know what's going to happen when the princess comes…
I don't want him to leave me…
Why am I thinking about this now? I should just enjoy this…while it lasts…
"What are you thinking about?" Mamoru asked her.
"Oh…nothing…it's silly." Usagi played with her fork.
"Tell me." Mamoru prompted her.
"I was just thinking about what would happen when the princess comes…" Usagi admitted. "I think, 'Will this last?'"
"Usagi…" Mamoru reached out towards her. She bowed her head. "Someone told me that you can't predict the future. Things don't always end up perfect. The princess…you know I don't have any answers that can help. We don't know what will happen."
"I'm sorry." Usagi looked downcast. "I shouldn't have brought it up. I want you to be happy…maybe if you're happy enough you won't leave me no matter what." She heard the clatter of his plate as he suddenly grabbed hold of her and held her tightly against him. "Mamoru!"
"Do you think I'll be happy without you?" Mamoru whispered seriously. "Do you think…Usagi…I don't deserve you in my life. I don't deserve to have you love me. Usako…"
"Usako…?" Usagi looked up at him. His midnight blue eyes twinkled as they looked into her.
"It's just…I guess…" Mamoru blushed a little. "Do you mind?"
"I like it." Usagi tilted her chin towards him. "Now I have to think of a nickname for you."
"You don't have to…" Mamoru trailed off.
"No, it'll be our special thing." Usagi told him. "No matter what happens." He leaned down, about to kiss her when she suddenly burst out with, "Mamo-chan!" He pulled back a little surprised. "That's cute, isn't it?"
"Usako…" Mamoru shook his head a little with a smile. "If you want to call me that, then I like it."
"I'm glad." Usagi stated. "Now, are you going to kiss me?"
"I was thinking about it." Mamoru bent down to deliver the kiss. The sun had almost completely set as their lips touched, enjoying the moment together.
I can't be happy without you.
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"Okay." Yaten set down his paintbrush. "I'm almost done. You can sit down if you want."
"My feet were starting to hurt." Hotaru admitted and sat down sheepishly. "Can I see?"
"No." Yaten shook his head. "Not until it's finished."
"Alright." Hotaru stretched her arms. Yaten yawned and then rubbed his eyes wearily. He hadn't gotten much sleep the past few nights as he had stayed up late working. Taiki had commented on his renewed inspiration. Taiki didn't know about Hotaru, no one in the house did and he preferred to keep it that way.
"I'm tired." Yaten said out loud before getting up and falling down on his bed.
"I'll um…" Hotaru stood up and started to walk passed the bed. "If you're tired, I should probably leave so you can sleep…"
A hand reached up, grabbing hold of her wrist and pulling sharply. Hotaru fell backwards onto the bed. Her whole body stiffened as Yaten's arms wrapped around her.
"I want to hold onto something…" He murmured in her ear. "Let me hold onto you." Hotaru's breath caught in her throat and she couldn't do anything. Yaten's arms were so warm…
Why…?
Why are you holding onto me?
He seemed to fall asleep but Hotaru felt like she couldn't possibly ever sleep like this. She didn't want to get up because if she did, he'd wake up and she didn't want Yaten to get mad at her. Now that he'd really get mad, but he'd be annoyed with her.
It seems like I'm only a half-step above the models he usually uses.
"At least you're not air-headed like the other models…"
Do you hold onto them too?
She tried to shake these thoughts from her head and as she did so, she found herself feeling a little sleepy. And before she knew it, she was waking up again but the light had changed by now.
"Oh no!" Hotaru sat up quickly.
"What?" Yaten sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes with his hands.
"I should be home by now! Setsuna will wonder where I am." Hotaru got up off the bed.
"I'll walk you home." Yaten started to get up off his bed.
"No, I…" Hotaru felt like she'd go red if she looked at him. "I'll be fine."
"I'm already up." Yaten put his shoes on and Hotaru didn't really have a choice in the matter. Yaten led her through the mostly dark house. As they passed two other doors, there were lights coming from under the doors.
"Are your cousins home?" Hotaru asked him quietly.
"My cousins?" Yaten looked at her in bewilderment. "Oh…them. I guess." They walked out of the house and then out onto the sidewalk that Hotaru had come by every Wednesday.
They walked along for a little while before Yaten spoke.
"So you live with your aunt?" Yaten questioned.
"Yes." Hotaru lied. She felt bad that she couldn't tell the truth but the explanation behind Setsuna and her was too much involved with them being Sailor Senshi.
"And she doesn't know where you go on Wednesdays?" Yaten inquired.
"No." Hotaru hung her head. "I didn't really think to tell her and…Setsuna…well, anyways…I might be moving away soon."
"What?" Yaten stopped walking completely to stare at her. "What do you mean moving?" He asked sharply.
"My aunt…she travels a lot." Hotaru tried her best to sound like she was telling the truth. "She was here for something but we'll probably be leaving now that it's done."
"When?" Yaten asked in a demanding tone.
"I don't know." Hotaru shrugged. She was surprised they hadn't left yet. Setsuna seemed to be waiting for something and Hotaru had no idea what that was.
"You can't leave." Yaten spoke quickly and from the look on his face, he hadn't meant to say that. "At least, not until I'm done painting you."
"I'm sure you can find a prettier model then me if I leave." Hotaru looked down at the pavement. "Then you can paint beautiful pictures." Yaten still hadn't started walking.
"I am painting beautiful pictures." Yaten snapped at her. "What do you think I've been doing all this time?"
"I-I didn't mean…" Hotaru instantly felt bad.
"Am I that bad?" Yaten's eyes were so intense that Hotaru didn't know how to respond. "Is it that bad to be around me?!"
"No! That's not what I meant!" Hotaru couldn't help it as she began to tear up. She couldn't start crying. "I'm…sorry…I…" A tear overflowed down her cheek, followed by another.
"A woman's tears are so ugly." Yaten declared and began walking again. Hotaru looked up at his back. He stopped and turned towards her. "Aren't you coming?" She stared at him and then nodded slowly. "Don't waste tears on me."
"I didn't--!" Hotaru didn't know what she was going to say in response to this but she was going to think of something until Yaten suddenly whirled around. Then she stopped. "What is it?" She looked around curiously.
"Olive blossoms…" Yaten murmured and she looked at him curiously. "I could have sworn I smelt…"
"I don't smell anything." Hotaru sniffed at the air.
"It's gone now." Yaten looked off into the darkness. "I need to go shopping tomorrow, will you come with me?"
"Um, alright." Hotaru agreed, surprised by the quick change of subject. "If my aunt says it's alright." It seemed as of late she was spending a lot of time with Yaten. He seemed to want to take her along on every errand he went on. The exhibit where his paintings were going to be shown was going to be soon. She hoped he'd finish all his paintings by then.
But…well, all this business that Setsuna had is obviously taken care of so we'll be going home soon.
I've gotten used to being around Yaten. It's strange to leave now.
I wonder why we're still here.
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It's so good to be updating! Yah for Jade! She's responsible some of the time. . Glass bottled cokes are superior to non-glass bottled cokes. I shall never drink soda out of a can or plastic bottle again! (This is what I'll say when I'm famous and have lots of money to spend on nothing but the superior glass bottled sodas of the world.) Please review!!!