Disclaimer: I do not own Romeo & Juliet. I also do not own any of the

characters appearing in this scene.

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Chapter Three

Act One

Scene Two

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Capulet: Jake Morgendorffer

Paris: Charles "Upchuck" Ruttheimer the Third

Servant: Botan

Benvolio: Miroku

Romeo: Yusuke

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Setting: A street

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"Look, all I'm saying," Jake said, somewhat calmed down from

the last time he'd been outside his home, "Is that, maybe those Montagues

aren't as bad as we thought. I mean, they're just people, like us, you know?"

He smiled at the young Charles "Upchuck" walking beside him.

"Sure, yeah, I guess so," Upchuck replied dully, obviously not very

interested in the subject at hand. "So, about that offer I made you-"

"Wha-GAH! She's only fourteen years old, for Christ's sake!"

"Yes, but I do not mind the age difference," Said Upchuck, a look

of noble sacrifice on his face. "I have long been entranced by your daughters'

beauty..."

"I don't know," Jake said uneasily. "If you can get her consent, I

guess..."

Upchuck grinned, perverted thoughts flying by his mind. "Oh, I

wouldn't worry about that," The delusional kid said dreamily.

"Uh..." Jake said nervously, not liking the way this conversation

was going. "Oh! Hey!" He added suddenly, brightening up. "I'm having

a little get-together at my place. Interested?"

"Will the lovely ladies be gracing us with their presence?"

Upchuck asked, his lip curling in a not very reassuring grin.

"Um... Yeah?"

"Then I'll be there," Charles replied, smirking and walking off into

the streets.

Jake looked after him for a moment. The whole exchange had been

rather confusing for him...

"Oh, Botan?" He said suddenly, turning to his messenger.

"At your service!" She chirped happily, bowing, the usual wide smile

playing on her face.

"I need someone to hand out invitations, and-"

"Say no more!" Botan took the offered invitations and walked off

lightly, eyeing the paper interestedly.

Jake shrugged, smiled, and left the streets somewhat more cheerful

than he had been beforehand.

"Huh?" Botan said aloud, confused. "Mr. Morgendorffer-"

He was gone by now.

"Um... I can't... Read... American..." She said awkwardly, realizing

that she should have mentioned this earlier.

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"Your pain is curable only by one thing, my friend," Miroku said,

a wistful look entering his eyes. "You must find a new love to replace

Lady Keiko."

"It's not that easy," Yusuke grumbled. He appreciated that Miroku

was trying to help, but he would really have liked to be left alone. "Keiko

was- Oh, hey Botan," He said, almost bumping into the "Grim Reaper" as,

strangely enough, she was sometimes known.

"Hello, Yusuke," She said cheerfully. "Houshi-sama," She added,

bowing to Miroku. "Can either of you read American?" Botan asked hopefully,

holding the invitations out in front of her.

"I apologize, Lady Botan, but I cannot," Miroku said sadly, bowing

his head. Botan gave him an odd look, then turned back to Yusuke, a pleading

look in her eyes.

"Nope. Sorry," Yusuke said carelessly, shrugging his shoulders.

"Oh," Botan said, crestfallen. "I suppose I must go back to my master..."

The ferrywoman jumped onto her large oar and soared off toward her

household.

Miroku watched in what could have been astonishment, but, in all

honesty, he was trying to look up the unknowing girl's skirt.

"Anyway, Miroku-MIROKU!" Yusuke shouted, noticing that the

monk's eyes had been wandering again.

"Hm? Oh, yes, did you want something Yusuke?" Miroku replied

dreamily, a smile playing on his face.

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Look, I appreciate your help, but I'd like

to just be alone for a while, if you don't mind."

"Oh, no you don't, Yusuke-kun," Miroku said, a determined light

in his eye. "Botan is messenger to the head of the house of Capulets. At

that dance will be Lady Keiko, who has taken your heart. Behold her, and

all the other beauties by her, and I guarantee that by this time tomorrow

you will have fallen deeply in love with some kind, gentle, well-endowed..."

He was getting another wistful look in his eye which was rather disturbing.

Yusuke cleared his throat, successfully getting the lecherous monk's

attention.

"Oh, forgive me, Yusuke," He said pleasantly. "But you take my

meaning, do you not? Come to the dance, and if you do not find another

lover, I will admit that I am incorrect and leave you to your depression."

Yusuke sighed. "So if I go to this stupid thing, you'll quit this?"

"Yes," Miroku replied evenly.

"Alright- I'll go. But I'm gonna live to regret this."