Okay, this thing's going really, really slow. I mean, 11 chapters or whatever and I'm still in Rustboro. So hopefully by the end of this chapter they'll be in Dewford, or at least on the boat. Only time will tell . . .
[uh-huh..uh-huh i see....where the hell's that?!]
Somewhere.
Disclaimer: I know something you don't know! Nyah nyah!
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Ch 11: Frustrations
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I walked right out of that dumb school and decided to wander around a bit more. Hey, look at that! It's a building! Oh my gosh! Look over there! It's another building! GASP! HOLY CRAP! BUILDINGS EVERYWHERE!
Now that that's out of my system . . .
I clutched my stomach and groaned as it grumbled. Gotta find a restaurant or something. Let's see . . . McDonald's? Nah, too greasy. Torchic-Fil-A? Um . . . I think I'll pass . . . Krabby House? If there's nothing better. Treecko Treehouse?? Pikachu Pie House?? . . . Aw, sick . . . Staryu Shortstack Shack! Pichu Pancake House . . .
These people come up with some strange names . . .
Oh well, I'll probably find something else on the way. So I continued my little trek through the city. Not much was really happening. Basically, it was just building after building after building. Very boring after a while.
Well, it was boring until I laid eyes on a very big, very red building. "The Devon HQ is in Rustboro?" I asked to no one in particular. Well fancy that. I didn't know much about Devon, except that it and Silph were like the bitterest of rivals. But that's a good thing, for if it weren't for their needs to be better than the other then we probably wouldn't have made much technological advances. Well, in the Pokemon world that is. I'm not really sure what Silph and Devon have done to help the rest of society. Probably burn up more money than a . . . thing.
"Like, stop him!" I heard an all-too familiar voice screech out. Just then I saw that guy in the red sweater sprint past me with the guy in the red suit right behind him. Now that I think about it . . . a lot of people wear red. That Magma dude, the guy in the red suit, Brendan, Hiro, Ash. Heck, even I'm wearing red! Don't even get me started on the random people I've met who wear red, or how the roof of the Pokemon Center is red, or the Devon HQ, the top of Pokeballs, or even some Pokemon who are red.
That's some freaky shiz right there . . .
Anyways, back to the current situation.
Wait, what was the current situation?
Oh yeah. Gotta help the moron. With I sigh I ran after the two. That must have been a sight. To see three people running into the northern part of town in all their red glory. I'd pay money to see that. Luckily I didn't have to, 'cause I was one of the people.
Ya know what? I think I need a new outfit.
Now's probably not the time to think of clothes though.
Actually, blue might not be so bad on me. Definitely not pink though. Would the Gothy look do well on me? Nah, probably not. Purple doesn't sound too bad.
Well as long as it isn't red.
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If I had known I'd be running five miles after those two S.O.B.s, I would have just said screw them and gone back to the Pokemon Center. For one, I'm not an endurance runner. Secondly . . . umm . . .
Anyways! We finally stopped at the very edge of the city. Well, we as in myself and monsieur Gay. The other red-clad dude? Well he left us eating his dust. It wasn't that tasty either.
Okay, now's not really the time to start cracking lame jokes.
"If I had a gun and I had to decide to kill either you or him," I said between gasps, "it would definitely be you. Dipshit."
"Missy you, like, gotta help me!" Was he deaf or something? I just cursed at him and told him I'd shoot him if I had the chance. Aw, the hell with it. Talking to him is probably like talking to a brick wall. Which, I might add, was something I wouldn't mind slamming him into at the moment.
"Missy, were you listening to me?"
"First of all my name's May not Missy ya freaking ########! Second of all—"
"Missy, that hot guy, like, took my papers! I'll be, like, totally screwed if I don't get them back!" Yup, I was definitely talking to a brick wall here, a gay brick wall.
"Damn it shut the hell up!" I screamed at him, and added a slap to the face in the process. I felt somewhat better. "Alright Homer—I can call you Homer right?—I'll get you your damn papers back. You just . . . stay here and screw around with a tree or something. Just don't follow me. Got it?"
"You'd really do that for me?" he asked between sobs. "Why?"
"'Cause I can't stand your damn voice! I swear you're like Kelly, except multiplied by, like . . . 200! Gawd you're even making me talk like you!" He blinked back a tear. I guess I must have hit a soft spot or something 'cause the next thing I knew he was giving the grass a bath. I grabbed my hair in frustration (even though I had a bandana on. I'm still wondering how I did that), then smacked him across the temple. Just like that, he was out like a light. I breathed a deep sigh of relief, and so did Torchic.
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I wonder how Brendan's doing, I thought to myself. Whoa! Rewind! Did I just think about BRENDAN??!!
HELL NO! Not me, nuh uh!
Okay, let's think about something else, shall we?
Such as why the hell did I get myself lost in a forest for Mr. I-Think-Guys-Are-Hot?
Well let's ask the bug catcher shall we?
"Excuse me sir," I said to the bug catcher. He turned around. "AAAHHH!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!"
That guy was a freaking woman okay? It scared the fizz out of me. That thing was either an ugly man or an even uglier woman.
Maybe I shouldn't have run from Buggy, no matter how revolting his/her face was, 'cause I didn't see another person for another fifteen minutes. Finally I came upon a little kid. Bubba, he liked to call himself. Hey, whatever floats his boat.
"Hey kid—"
"Bubba."
"Whatever kid—"
"Bubba."
"Right. Bubba. Well kid—""BUBBA!"
"Okay! Sheesh!" What a brat! "Well, Bubba, have you seen a big boy run by wearing this really fuc—funny sweater?"
"The one with the hornzees?"
"Uhhh . . . right, the one with the hornzees."
"Uh huh! He went that way!" he said as he jerked a finger to 'that' way. I looked to where he pointed. I turned back to the kid. I smiled, patted his head and left. I think I'm gonna go get better directions now. 'Cause there's no way I'm gonna walk into a thicket of thorns.
I got better directions at this house in the middle of the forest. I have no clue what it was doing there, but who cares? They gave me directions and that's all I cared about at the moment. It's a good thing I talked to them 'cause they told me that construction on Rustboro Tunnel had been suspended due to . . . uhhh . . . something. I told you all I wanted was directions.
Anyways, they told me to take my time 'cause the guy ran right into a dead end. So I did. I strolled through the forest, whistling some random tune while Torchic walked beside me.
"Hey Torchic," I said to the little bird to get her attention, "ever wonder how it could be the start of winter, yet the trees still have green leaves?"
"Torchic," she chirped with a shrug.
"Well don't normal trees lose their leaves? I mean it is winter and all. They should, shouldn't they? They're not even pine trees either."
"Chic, chic, Torchic tor."
"Why couldn't you guys be more like Digimon? At least they can speak English." She looked up at me, tilted her head, and blinked. I arched an eyebrow. "What?"
"Torchic!" Startled, I looked down at my Pokemon, then looked to where it was pointing to with a foot. A big, stupid grin crawled onto my face. I pulled out my Pokédex, aimed it at the Pokémon and hit the information button.
{TAILLOW: The Tinyswallow Pokemon. Taillow courageously stands its ground against foes, however strong they may be. This gutsy Pokemon will remain defiant even after a loss. On the other hand, it cries loudly if it becomes hungry.}
I closed the Pokédex and placed it back in my fanny pack. "Wanna catch it?" Torchic nodded. "Aighty then, go Torchic!" Torchic jumped forward, startling the Taillow and causing it to take to the air.
"Use your Ember like a shotgun!" Torchic took a deep breath, then let loose with a flurry of small flames. Two of them clipped Taillow in its left wing, burning a few feathers, causing it to plummet toward the ground.
"Tackle!" I yelled. Torchic obeyed and dashed over to Taillow. Just before the bird was about to hit the ground, Torchic connected. It slid across the dirt and stopped just before reaching the grass.
I whistled. For a little bird, that thing sure did leave behind a good-sized trail. I unclipped a free Pokeball and threw it at the unconscious Pokemon. It hit the bird, opened up, and swallowed up Taillow after it changed into the red light. Jeez, more red. It didn't even bother to resist.
"Sweet! We caught our first Pokemon!" Torchic chirped with joy and jumped up and down.
Now to catch the culprit.
Dang, I sound so . . . heroic . . .
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I approached the entrance hesitantly. I'm usually not one to be afraid to go into caves and all, but that mist brought the spookiness level up a notch.
"Ready?" I asked Torchic. She hopped back onto my shoulder and nodded. Counting to three, I entered through the seven-foot tall passage.
I just hope there aren't any ghosts. I hate ghosts. Especially Duskulls. They're so . . . creepy.
The steady sounds of my footsteps were all that could be heard as I groped for any kind of slippery, slimy surface. It wasn't dark in there; it was just the fog that made me feel blind. "You think you can get rid of some of this fog?" I asked Torchic. She shot out a few embers but they were immediately doused. She tried it again, but to no avail. Frustrated, she used Blaze to power up and shot out a stream of embers.
"Wh—who's there?!" I heard a voice shout out. I smiled. It sounded like the guy I was looking for, and he was scared. Good. I felt the wall I was using as a guide suddenly stop. I assumed that I was at a corner, and it seemed I assumed correctly.
"Again, Torchic," I whispered to her. The orange glow returned to her body and she shot out another stream of embers. I heard an almost girly scream reverberate throughout the tunnel.
"Ow ow ow! It's hot!" Seems she got him. I released my Staryu and ordered it to shoot off a Water Gun.
"Cold! Cold cold cold!"
"Torchic."
"Hot!"
"Staryu."
"COLD!"
Hey, this is pretty fun!
Five more minutes of that and I released my newly caught Taillow, which I had healed earlier with a potion.
"Use Gust and get rid of this fog." Taillow chirped and rose slowly into the air, the fog dampening its feathers.
"Not at me!" I yelled at it just before it began the attack. "At him! That way!" I said and pointed my finger in the freak's direction. It chirped an apology and turned around.
A few seconds later I could see the Magma dude thoroughly soaked in water, with his clothes burned to a nice, black crisp. Ooh, I wouldn't wanna be in his shoes. Actually I wouldn't want to be in any other's shoes except mine. I don't trust other people's feet.
He collapsed onto the ground on his stomach. Slowly reaching into his pocket, he took out a boxy thing—somehow untouched—and slid it toward me. "Take it," he said with a raspy voice, "take it all. Just leave me alone." What? Take what all? All he took was that box right?
"Wingull!" I heard something exclaim. What the—he stole a Wingull? What's a Wingull? Whatever. I walked up to him, grabbed the box and the Wingull, which looked like a cute, mutant seagull, and left him there.
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Nope, they ain't in Dewford. Actually they won't be on the boat for a couple of chapters, just to give you fair warning.
Well it was either cut it here or you'd have something like a 14 page chapter. I don't know about you, but my attention span is too small to read that much for one chapter.
[Really??! Huh...0o]
Just my attention span. Not my memory.
[If you say so.]
OH FOR PETE'S SAKE! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I PROVEN TO YOU THAT MY MEMORY DOESN'T SUCK?! UNLIKE YOURS!
[HEY! THAT'S . . . NOT NICE! I can remember things too ya know!]
Uh huh, sure.
[#######.]
Right . . . Well anywayz, y'all will haveta wait a little longer for the rest of the split chapter.
REVIEW PPL!!
Since I didn't do it last chapter . . . SHOUT OUT TIME!!
[YAY!! . . . --zZzZzZ]
EZF: Yeah I agree wit' you. I realized I took it a little too far with the perverted stuff on that chapter. Don't worry I'm cuttin' back on that. I'm getting annoyed with Homer also. Luckily he won't be in it much longer . . . btw you're the 50th reviewer person thing. Tell me if you want to be in it or not. Oh yeah, if you say yes make sure the pkmn aren't too strong cuz as you know May and Brendan are still newbies. Or you can wait until the later chapters. ::shrugs:: whatever, your choice. I could care less.
Right . . . DZF . . . not EZF . . . okay I think I got it now. DZF is stupid one . . . don't know about EZF . . .
That wasn't meant to be an insult . . .
Lunar Sphinx: I forgot to answer the question u asked. First of all . . . who's Leo? He wuz never in the Matrix . . . you talkin' about Neo? He's the main character.
Sakura Phoenix: She inherited what?! NO! GET AWAY FROM ME! I DON'T WANT DA BAKA VIRUS!
[I think it's a little too late for that . . . ]::thinks to self:: don't cuss, cussing bad. Cussing is evil.
Sakura (still): Do you live in Connecticut? My dad's from there . . . I'm not, but he is . . .
SilverWolf66: I feel Brendan's pain too. Probably more . . . I GOT KICKED IN THE BALLS BY A GUY! IT FREAKING HURT! But I'm okay now; I just kicked him back in the mouth is all. No biggie. I only knocked him unconscious and made him lose a tooth . . . BUT HE DESERVED IT!
Thanx for the compliment.
APAC: haha, that's funny . . . apac . . . funnyness . . . getting grounded forever is a pretty long time . . .
YOU DID! YAY! WE SHOULD HAVE A PARTY! It's just . . . that . . . I got grounded from parties . . . life sux . . . OOH! I LIKE CONNECT-THE-DOTS! It's so . . . boring . . .
Oh yeah, that one email you got and you replied by asking, "I feel kinda stupid but . . . who is this?" that wuz me . . . sry forgot to put my name . . . ::shrugs:: whatever
Breezy: Yeah I hate those kinda "writers." It's not like we're dying of the suspense . . . usually them ppl are the crappy one's n e wayz . . .
YEAH! WE'RE ALL ONE BIG HAPPY WANNABE FAMILY!
Angel: Hey there! I just wanted to let you know that I really appreciate your review! It's just SO freaking . . . uhhh . . . it's a . . . hmm . . .
[Five bucks says he'll blame his lack of thought on the time and energy he spends writing this fic.]
::glares at Ana::
[Can I help you?]
I hate you.
[HA! YOU OWE ME FIVE BUCKS!]
HAHAHA—in your dreams.
[Whatever.]
Exactly.
[What?]
Nothin . . .
K, that's it for this chapter. Review please!
I restarted my game and found out that Homer wears a blue suit. Oh well. Blue just doesn't fit him like red does.