::blinks twice:: eheheheheh . . . hi?
[::pats wooden stick::]
Umm . . . BYE!
[GET BACK HERE! ::runs after KaAn::]
I didn't do it! IT'S NOT MY FAU—OWIE! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! ::rubs top of head::
[TWO MONTHS! YOU HAD OVER TWO FRIGGIN MONTHS AND YOU'RE ASKING WHY I HIT YOU?! ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING?! ::hits KaAn on the head repeatedly::]
I WILL ::SMACK:: BE IF YOU ::WHAMMY:: KEEP DOING THAT! ::THWACK!:: ALRIGHT THAT'S IT! DON'T MAKE ME KUNG FU YOUR ASS!
[::grumbles and puts away wooden stick::]
Yeah that's what I thought! ::walks away::
::WHACK!::
(expletive) IT MALIA!
[I just realized. No matter how good you are, you can't beat me and my anti-son-of-a-bitch-stick.]
::grumbles::
[Now where were we? Oh yes. YOU HAD OVER TWO FRIGGIN MONTHS! WHY THE HECK DID IT TAKE YOU THAT FRIGGIN LONG JUST TO WRITE ONE STUPID CHAPTER?!]
Ah, my dear Malia. There is an excuse for everything. Now hush, sit down and listen to my tale. A tale of hardships, of suffering, of defeats, griefs, and a bunch of other synonyms that I can't think of right now.
[I'd . . . rather not . . . ]
Don't worry, it's so boring you'll probly fall asleep within the first five minutes.
[ . . . . . . ]
DISCLAIMER AND QUOTE!
Disclaimer: Would you believe me if I said I did? No? Me neither.
Quote: I feel sorry for all of you who take forever to fall asleep. I can do it in a snap! I could even fall asleep right here on the keyb—ghtufkndyghdhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
::camera fades away from the two people sitting on the floor:: Now you see, it all started when my father's brother's cousin's nephew's sister's husband's wife's son's niece . . . uh, Xiao Liao [::rude gesture::], happened to— ::screen goes dark::
........................................................................................
Chapter 14: Next Stop, Dewford! Finally!
........................................................................................
"OH MY GOSH!" May screamed. "It's happening! It's really happening! We're finally getting on the dumb boat! After 14 chapters we're finally leaving this place! Thanks for nothing KaAn! YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHING PIECE OF FUDGEBERRIES! WHAT KINDA PERSON ARE U TO LEAVE A GIRL—okay I just totally lost my train of thought."
"Uh . . . huh . . ." Brendan said, blinking twice.
She whipped her head around and glared at Brendan. She pointed a finger at Brendan accusingly and yelled, "Shut up! It's all your fault!"
"What did I do?!"
"I don't know! But it's still your fault!"
"Really strange," old man Briney whispered to Peeko. May stopped her ranting and raised an eyebrow.
"And this is coming from the man running around his table for absolutely no reason at all . . ."
"HEY! IT'S NOT POINTLESS! I WAS . . . EXCERCISING! Around . . . the . . . table . . . "
"Call it what you will," she said with a wave of her hand in dismissal. "Can we go now?" Briney glared and crossed his arms.
"Hmph. I have half a mind—"
"Whoa whoa wait, you have a mind?" she asked in fake bewilderment.
"—not to take you two anywhere," he said through clenched teeth. May simply hit a button to open up her PokeNav. It did this fancy-shmancy thing and with a whoosh it opened. She hit a few buttons on it to as if she were calling someone. She looked up from her Nav.
"You know those fried Wingull of yours?" Briney nodded slowly. "If you want, I can call the one who did that and ask his Pokemon to come and fry that thing." Peeko's eyes bulged at hearing that and started squawking and flew around the shack like a trapped bird trying to find an exit. Briney spent the next few minutes chasing his beloved bird Pokemon down and calm its 100 mile a minute beating heart.
He hung his head in defeat and stared at what was left of his wooden (attached with rope) shoes. "Fine, I shall take you wherever you want," he said with a disheartened tone.
"Jeez, you sound like one of those prisoners in a movie who's forced to help a bad guy in their diabolical scheme to blow up the world and rid the universe of . . . toilet paper . . . or something." Briney continued to stare at the ground, showing only a defeated and conquered look in his eyes.
"No, it's worse than that," he whispered. "Let's go, I'll take you to the boat." He walked out of the shack and towards the dock, the two trainers following.
"You know the guy who fried the Wingulls?" Brendan whispered along the way.
"It happened during my battle with him, I didn't get his number but Briney doesn't have to know that," she whispered back. They noticed Briney stop at the foot of the dock, so they came to a halt as well. He pointed to the end of the dock, where a white boat could be seen riding the gentle waves that passed underneath its hull.
"There it is," he said, with a hint of pride that could be detected in his voice. With his head held high, he walked down the dock to the boat, the trainers close by. They walked close to each other; the continuous rocking of the dock frightening the sea-faring n00bs. Each step they took was the same Briney took for fear of falling through the creaking dock should they place their foot anywhere else. After a few minutes they made it to the boat. With an order from Briney to stay still, they watched him jump in and prep the boat for travel, his little bird pitching in wherever needed. Fifteen minutes later they were allowed to take foot on the boat. The next chapter of their path to greatness was about to begin, and they were ready to take on any challenges, any obstacles, that path might throw at them.
[Can you hurry up? We know it's been 15 chapters and you're finally at the boat, but must you make a big deal of it?]
((I can make a bigger deal of it if you'd like. Now shut up, I'm trying to type here.))
[Oh, my heart breaks for you!]
((Gee, thanx for your sympathy ::rolls eyes::))
........................................................................................
"-Water . . . ugh,-" Cyndaquil spat in disgust as the Pokemon followed their trainers on board the fair-sized white boat.
"-What's there to hate? Water's fun!-" Staryu exclaimed once everyone had safely jumped onto the transporter. Cyndaquil rolled his little eyes.
"-Hmmm . . . how about this? It's wet, wet, and oh yeah! Wet!-"
"-Isn't that a good thing?-" Staryu pondered.
"-Nope, dry water's a good thing!" Bagon said in an attempt at humor. "-What?-" he queried when he found two blinking pairs of eyes and a blinking core looking at him.
"-Bagon,-" Torchic started, "-please don't make an attempt at humor ever again." The other two nodded, saying 'yes' repeatedly.
Suddenly the Pokemon stumbled forward as they felt the boat lurch and begin its journey over the waves. As soon as they got their footing, Cyndaquil walked over to his partner and placed a paw on Bagon's shoulder. "-You see, it's for your own good. Seriously, it is! You see Torchic and I have known Brendan for a while. You're attempt at humor sounded so familiar to Brendan's it's scary.-" Bagon's face lit up and gave his companions a big goofy smile.
"-Wow, really? Thanks for warning me guys.-"
"-Well what are friends for?-" Torchic chirped.
"-Hey guys watch me!-" Staryu shouted. Everyone turned his/her attention to the starfish. "-Belly-flop!-" Staryu jumped over the edge. They heard a splash, then another when it jumped back onto the boat. Then it repeated the process.
"-Someone gave her too much sugar,-" Cyndaquil whispered to Torchic. She nodded.
"-The question is," Torchic whispered back, "-where the heck is her mouth?-" They fell silent, pondering on exactly how a Pokemon with no mouth gets its nutrition mainly because they had nothing better to do with their lives at the moment.
"-Maybe she absorbed the sugar,-" Bagon thought out loud. "-What?-" he asked when he saw two Pokemon blinking at him . . . again.
"-Explain,-" Cyndaquil said. Torchic nodded. Bagon took a deep breath, then began his . . . explanation . . .
"-Okay, let's say she's kinda like a sponge. Sponges absorb water, right?-" The two nodded slowly, not getting any of it. "-Well maybe she's like a sponge, except that she absorbs nutrients when she's in the water, instead of absorbing the water itself?-" They blinked. "- . . . Maybe?-"
"-So let me see if I understand this correctly,-" Cyndaquil said after a few minutes. "-Someone loaded the ocean with sugar?-"
Bagon shrugged. "-Sure.-"
"-But the ocean's full of salt.-"
"-I guess so . . . -"
"-That means it's not full of sugar.-"
"- . . . Oh . . . -"
"-Nice one, Genius,-" Torchic directed to Bagon. Bagon glared before sitting down. The other two sat down, a little bit away from Bagon, and the three watched Staryu jump in and out of the water.
Five boring hours of watching Staryu jump later . . .
"-I'm bored,-" Bagon sighed.
"-WE KNOW!-" the fire Pokemon angrily shouted in unison.
"-AAAAHHHH! Sheesh! Sorry for pissing you off!'
"-Saying 'I'm bored' every 10 minutes tends to do that to a Pokemon!-" Torchic roared. "-So could you stop being so stupid and just keep your mouth shut?!-"
"-Hey! I'm not stupid! I'm just dumb! There's a difference you know!-"
"- . . . . . . . . . -"
"- . . . . . . . . . -"
"-We've lost 'im,-" Torchic whispered. Cyndaquil nodded while smiling innocently at the slightly confused dragon. Staryu splashed out of the water once again, but the Pokemon paid no attention after hearing the same sound over and over and over and over and over and over andoverandoverandoverandoverandoverandoverandover again.
((gasps for air))
[-.-;;]
((What??))
[That wasn't necessary.]
((Yeah well this fic isn't necessary.))
[Ah . . . good point.]
This time, however, was different though. Instead of splashing back into the water, she waited TWO more seconds than usual, then splashed back. The fire Pokemon peered over the edge.
"-She done—YEAAAAAAAOH!-" With a final spray of water Staryu jumped onto the boat, and stood on the deck facing two angry, wet pyrokinetics.
"-Ummm . . . sorry?-" Their glares deepened. Staryu gave a nervous chuckle and backed up, but still prepared to defend herself. "-You . . . umm . . . shouldn't have been standing there?-" Tiny flames started to form on Cyndaquil's back; Torchic's body gave off a faint glow. Luckily, Bagon intervened.
He got in between them and spread out his stubby arms. "-Hey hey! Now there's no need for fighting. Let's settle this the democratic way. Who votes Staryu get beaten up?-" A pair of paws and wings shot up into the air. "-Then it's settled! EVERYBODY TACKLE STARYU AND FORCE HER TO TELL US HER SECRET!-"
' . . . Secret . . . ?' Staryu thought. She didn't have time to dwell on the thought, since a steel-like head knocked her in the core and a pair of paws and wings pinned her to the side of the boat. Bagon held his hands behind his back and paced back and forth. He stopped suddenly and got all up in her core since he didn't know where her face was. "-W-what do you guys want?-" she stuttered, giving nervous glances to each of the Pokemon.
"-We just need to know one thing. One tiny little detail that the creator of Pokemon left out."
"-What . . . detail?-" Torchic gave Staryu a little shove into the side of the boat.
"-We're asking the questions here!-" Staryu's core flashed a dangerous bright red before dying down again.
"-Now tell us, Staryu. Do you..have a mouth?-"
If Staryu had a jaw she'd be scraping it off the floor. "-WHAT?! ALL THIS BECAUSE YOU WANNA KNOW IF I HAVE A MOUTH?!-" The three backed up and smiled and nodded innocently. Staryu sighed. "-No I don't. If you're gonna ask how I talk, I just . . . do. . .-"
Torchic spoke up. "-Well then . . . how do you eat?-" Staryu just looked at her like she were crazy . . . or something.
"-How do I eat? Simple. Whenever I go underwater I absorb the nutrients from the water. That's where I get all my hyperness. I guess you could say I'm like a sponge.-" Cyndaquil and Torchic's jaws dropped. Bagon's didn't.
"-HELL YEAH! WHO'S GOOD?! I'M GOOD! HAHA SUCKAHS! WHO'S THE GENIUS NOW (expletive)?!-" The fire Pokemon's eyes twitched but decided against doing something not nice to the baby dragon type, whom was currently running around the boat like a crazy madman.
"-So . . .-" Cyndaquil began, "-Just how do you get so hyper? Last time I checked people and Pokemon don't exactly get on salt highs . . .-"
Staryu only gave a high-pitched giggle. "-This is Hoenn, silly. Not only is there a desert in the middle of an island with a volcano close by and the trees stay green all year and there's no night time in Hoenn even though the author did put a night time when May and Brendan were in Petalburg, but the ocean's full of sugar! Sugar, sugar, sugar, BOUNCY!-" She jumped back over the edge again, leaving behind the two still dumbfounded Pokemon.
"-Wow . . . did you understand any of that?-" Cyndaquil said to Torchic.
"-To be honest, ye—no.-" Just then they saw Bagon pass by and continue his victory sprint around the boat.
"-OH YEAH! WHO'S SMART?! I'M SMART! WHO'D A THUNK THERE'D BE SUGAR IN THE . . . oc . . . ahohshe-ahn . . . ocean? I'D A THUNK IT!-"
Torchic and Cyndaquil sweat-dropped and turned back to the sugar-filled sea.
((ehh . . . next part's kinda weird . . . ))
"-He's starting to turn into Muddy . . . -" Torchic whispered.
"-Who? -" Cyndaquil asked.
"-This Mudkip—a Swampert now probably—I used to know before May came. Him, Torchic—Flare I think—and I used to be inseparable even when Brendan picked him as his starter. Then May came and decided to choose Torchic, and the two left for their adventure. Then May came and decided to choose me, and she and Brendan left on their adventure. I still don't know how you got into this fic.-" Cyndaquil looked at her quizzically.
"-Riiiiiiight . . -"
"-What, you saying you don't believe me?-" Cyndaquil quickly shook his head.
"-I didn't say that. I'm only saying that I've been Brendan's Pokémon since he was about 9 years old. I became Brendan's Pokemon much like Ralts became Wally's."
"-When did that happen?-" Cyndaquil blinked.
"-When he was 9 years old . . . You were there when he came home with me . . . -"
"-Oh yeah . . . -"
((hope that answered n e 1's questions))
"-And how could there have been two May's?-"
"-Excuse me,-" a voice said behind them. The two jumped in the air and faced the voice, flames at the ready. What they saw in front of them truly shocked them.
"-Bagon, what the hell are you doing?-" they both nearly screamed. Bagon merely closed his eyes as he waited for the sounds to subdue.
"-What do you mean, what am I doing? -"
"-What we mean, -" Cyndaquil said, pointing to Bagon's head,"-is why are you wearing Harry Potter glasses and holding a book? -"
"-His lucky guess must have gone to his head, -" Torchic whispered. Cyndaquil nodded.
"-My dear Torchic, I must disagree with your statement. Despite my . . . rather interesting bouts of non-intellect, I am actually quite a non-non-intellectual Pokemon.-"
Torchic and Cyndaquil sweat-dropped and blinked.
"-Here, -" Bagon said, "-I shall prove it to you. -" He pushed his glasses further up his nose. He involuntarily scrunched his face and took it off, letting it fall onto the deck. "-Ohh, -" he said, rubbing his temples with his claws, "-Brendan has a small head.-" The two spared each other a glance. "-Here we go. -" Bagon adjusted the book onto both hands/claws and flipped it open. "-The history of May/Brendan and their Pokémon. Author: Unknown. Hey isn't that a Pokémon?-" Bagon chuckled at his rather pitiful joke. "-Anyways. The history of the May/Brendan started with a person dubbed 'The Winged Raccoon.' Hold on, there's an asterisk next to it. The footnote says the author has based this statement on unsure data . . . Okay. The person apparently scrapped the project. Then a new person, dubbed 'Breezy Wind'—I wonder, what kind of 'breezy wind' was the person talking about? -" Bagon looked toward his bottom. The two Pokemon sighed.
This can't be happening . . . they each thought.
"-This 'Breezy Wind' started up her own M/B story—it is the longest running one so far, and the most popular. The person later changed her name to . . . okay, let's do this slowly. Capital 'O', lower case 'x', uppercase 'B'—ya know what? This'll take too long. The author now calls herself OxBrEeZyxO. Wait . . . it says that this information is outdated. She now calls herself "o0o FeBrEeZe o0o." Jeez, where'd she come up with that name? I mean seriously, who in their right mind would call themselves 'FeBrEeZe'? Wait wait, now she's just plain 'Breezy' with a couple of circles before and after. Oh wow!-" He rolled his eyes. ((Don't kill me. Please? Eheheheh…::sweatdrops::))
"-This is way too much info, -" Torchic whispered. Cyndaquil nodded in agreement. Staryu jumped back onto the side of the ship and "looked" at the three Pokemon. Her core dimmed, apparently her version of blinking, and hopped onto the deck. She made for the little girl's room, shot a Watergun to open the door since she doesn't have hands, walked in and Watergunned the door shut.
"-Why is she in there if she has the whole ocean to use?" Torchic asked.
"-Doesn't wanna pollute the water?-" Bagon suggested.
"-Yeah sure Bagon, she doesn't wanna pollute the water. What difference would it make?! It's not like she'd kill a Pokemon or something!-"
The sound of the toilet flushing caused the Pokemon to alter their attention to Staryu.
"-Umm, Staryu?-" Torchic asked. Staryu hopped onto the railing and looked at Torchic. "-Why did you use the bathroom if you have the whole ocean to use?-"
"-More silly questions from our favorite fire chick huh?-" Staryu said with a giggle. "-Simple, I don't wanna pollute the ocean and kill a Pokemon or something.-" With that said she jumped back in the water.
"- . . . . . . . . . -"
"- . . . . . . . . . -"
"-OH YE—-"
"-SHUT UP!-" they both said. Bagon glared at them.
"-WELL SORRY FOR BEING RIGHT! Anyways . . . About a month later, a new and not-so-promising author with way too much time on his hands decided to start his own version of M/B. Reasons: Very extreme boredom.-" Bagon paused to flip the page. "-Interesting,-" he murmured to himself.
"-What is . . . ?-" they asked in a bored tone.
"-It seems that this author . . . -" Bagon looked up and caught their gaze. "-It seems that we are the product of this author's rather . . . how should I put it, passionate mind.-"
Torchic and Cyndaquil struggled to hold back their laughter. "-Sure,-" Torchic barely got out, "-Whatever you say pal.-" Torchic and Cyndaquil then walked away. As soon as they were out of sight, laughter could be heard throughout the boat. Bagon stood there, fuming.
"-I'll get them for that! I'll make them pay for what they've done! They haven't seen the wrath of—-"
"-GAAAAAAH!-" Bagon screamed as he jolted up. He looked over and saw Brendan leaning over him. Brendan blinked. Bagon blinked. Brendan blinked.
"Uh huh . . ." Brendan said slowly. "Well we're here Bagon. Have a nice nap?"
………………………………………………………………
………………………………………………………………
::checks watch:: Wow, she lasted 6 minutes. I guess I'm not as boring as I thought! AWESOME!
Yeah umm . . . sorry about the REALLY late update. Don't really wanna make up some stupid excuse, so I'm just gonna do replies and crap then go bed.
[::wakes up:: Whaa?]
Skitty 2004: Thanx. So . . . all that stuff in the past now right? Yeah I didn't mean to get u mad or anything, just had lack of explanation and time is all. Wow that was so long ago too . . . oh well.
Breezy:
[u didn't say n e thing . . . ]
Yeah so?
[U might make her mad.]
So?
[I'm just sayin' . . . ]
Sayin' what?
[THAT YOU'D MAKE HER MAD!]
Uh huh . . . Well n e wayz
LH: you go by LH right? Well that's wut I've seen in other reviews . . . can I read your eulogy?
Ana-Malia: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!
[SHUT UP BAKA! ::hits with infamous wooden stick::]
X.x
[You deserve it!]
Bubba: Yes . . . tongue twister . . . I like bang thump thing too . . . weird huh? Wow you're a smart one, nothing gets past you! Actually there was an Episode 2 but that got screwed up so I took it off and 1 of my reviewer friends said she couldn't even believe she was reviewing it and instead went back to her report on Bloody Mary. Nothing like a good drink to knock the funk right out of ya. Oh and thanks for the reviews!
AnimeGamer99: Thanx for the review! I hope that answered your question. As for the Devon dude . . . I was bored at the time (again . . .). I had no real reason for being all PO'ed at him haha. So I hope that also answered your question . . .
LuNar SphInX: Like it? I'm bored . . . again . . . You can use it if you feel like it I don't really care although u probably won't but hey who am I to try to predict your future decisions right? Well the dart thingy is . . . my best description? I guess . . .
You're very, VERY welcome! I can't believe I helped someone out . . . I feel so . . . disgusted . . . jk jk. I'm glad to have been of service. I think . . .
(psst. I'm not DBK n e more. Just wanted to let ya know.)
Hiei's Ice Girl:
[Ka—KaAn? ::looks around:: Where are you?]
::cowering in a corner::
[-.-;;]
Ice Girl . . . scaring me . . .
[::drags KaAn back by the ear:: THAT'S NO WAY TO TREAT A NEW REVIEWER!]
::looks at Ice Girl:: Uhhh, th-th-thanks! ::runs away . . . very quickly::
[Ummm . . . yeah . . . don't worry Icy he is thankful for the review . . .]
Hallo!
[Thought you were scared of her . . . ]
What? Oh, no I was just bored. You actually believed I was scar—
[BOO!]
::stands still with an impassive gaze:: What was that?
[Uhh . . . nothing . . . ]
Anyways, Ice Girl . . . did you read the whole thing? 'Cause it sounds like you did but it says chapter 1 and it confused me and probly cuz I don't have n e thing else to do right now.
[::whaps KaAn with wooden stick::]
WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!
[That was for making me look like an ass a couple of seconds ago.]
Pff, you do that all on your own.
[::whacks KaAn until he faints:: You little (expletive).]
x..X
[Right . . . guess I have closings . . . Well, that's it, hope you enjoyed it, and review like ya got a purpose!]
WHAT THE HELL DID DO?! CAN'T EVEN MAKE SMILEY FACES N E MORE! WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO?! LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME! And there's my daily rant.