A/N Sorry for the long wait, hope it was worth it!! Do you think this chapter goes to quick? Anyway please read and review. Many thanks.

Chapter Twenty Nine

As I stood there I felt every wrong that had ever been done to me, rush to my finger resting on the trigger. I thought of my parents death, how they had cheated me from a real life, Roberto's brutish treatment of me, and then his lack of regard as he bedded the maids. The loss of my son, the one thing that had really mattered to me, little Bobbie. I felt it all as I stood there, brandishing that gun. Then I thought of my new pain, the idea of losing Jack to another woman was unbearable. And as I stood there I could almost imagine that Annamaria was the cause of all this misery that resided inside of me.

I'd never murdered before, I'd never taken away someone's life in such a callous, jealous, and foolish way. Or at least not on purpose. And there I found myself, faced with a cutlass, and all my jealousies on my shoulders. I had never felt so strongly when I saw Roberto with other women, in fact I had rather urged him on, in the hope of him leaving me in some amount of peace.

I had hardly cared when I chanced in on him and Bonny, but with Jack it was different. I truly believed he cared, I'd given up so much, and he tossed it away like it was nothing.

She looked surprised, but spurned me on. She didn't suspect there was malice in side me, that I had the strength to pull the trigger. But there is hidden strength inside me.

The gun went off, and I felt the rebound all through my arm, and a splitting pain in my shoulder. The barrel had rusted, Jack had told me specifically to always dry the gun after contact with water. But after months of misery and suspicion, I cared not for Jack's instruction, but his women.

Annamaria fell to the floor, and I joined her in a sobbing heap, discarding my gun on the floor. She died instantly, and I cradled my shoulder in pain and anguish. And as I lay there waiting, I blamed everyone but myself.

When I awoke, Jack was by my side and I was resting on a comfy bed, the bed we shared together.

"Dora?" He said, in concern as he saw me begin to stir.

I smiled helplessly. "What happened?" I breathed.

"Annamaria is dead." He said, seriously. His lips were not bent in his usual, playful smile. He looked tired, and his shirt was stained red.

I tried to look shocked, hurt, but in truth I was numb.

"How?" I managed to stutter.

"You were with her." He exclaimed, rising his eyebrows.

"So I was." I said, chiding myself for my stupidity. "But I must have blacked out…" I couldn't look into his eyes.

He nodded, not really listening, I sensed his thoughts were else where.

"And of the enemy ship?" I inquired, in a similar tone to as if I was asking for afternoon tea.

"Still floating, but now manned with my men." He remarked. "She's a beauty, seemed a pity to sink 'er." He explained.

I nodded, but couldn't think of the words to phrase a reply.

"So what happened…below?" He asked, softly.

"I went down like you told me to, I met Annamaria."

"And?"

"I don't know, it's all a blur. I really can't remember what happened, I'm sorry Jack."

"It was your pistol." He said, glumly. "Jogging your memory yet?"

I raised my hand to my head, and muttered softly. "I have such a headache, perhaps we should talk later."

He grabbed my arm and pulled it roughly away from my head. I felt his grubby finger nails dig into my skin in a vice-like grip.

"What happened?"

The guilt rested so heavily on my heart. I had deprived another person of life. Running away with Jack had turned me into such a bad person, and because of it another had to die, just to suit my foolish jealously. The words were in my head, but I could not say them. I could not tell Jack what happened. My heart beat furiously as I tried to wriggle free of his grip. He loosened slightly, but was determined not to let go.

"She died for me, Jack." I said, quickly.

"What?" My arm dropped immediately, and I cuddled it in a protective way.

"One of the men, they followed me down. He grappled with me for the pistol…" I said, panting slightly. "Annamaria got in the way." I said, looking down and playing with the bed sheets in my sun tanned fingers.

He got up and walked to the cabin door. He didn't say anything as he disappeared out. I stared at the wooden walls and ran my finger nails over it, it seemed the only thing to calm me down. I jumped off the bed and slung the pillow against the wall, screaming. Everything went wrong for me, no matter what I did I lost somebody. No matter what I gained, I was deprived of something of equal importance. To be with Jack, I had lost Bobby. And now to be free of Annamaria, and the horrible suspicions which darkened my heart, I had lost Jack.

I'm sorry, but I have to take a break from my writing. Looking back on it all has upset me so very much. The pages are soggy with tear drops, and the majority of my scribblings are illegible. The words twist in front of my eyes and no longer have a meaning. To say I was scared, it says nothing to how I really felt. I saw the men take Annamaria's body and throw it overboard. I watched Jack as he pined for her, moping around the ship as though the world had fallen in. The rum store had vanished, and I suspect he drank it all in his mourning state.

He hadn't spoke to me since, and seemed very capable of avoiding me at every turn. Maybe in his heart he knew I had pulled the trigger. After all he never offered to replace my pistol.

Gibbs and the others seemed distant towards me, but perhaps it was the paranoia starting to take hold. And if I thought I was scared then, it was nothing compared to the petrifying weeks that were to follow.

"Alright?" Gibbs asked, in his powerful sea accent.

I smiled but did not supply an answer. He was pulling down one of the secondary sails for repair. I went forward to help him, but he shook his head.

"I can manage fine, Missy." He handed me his canteen. "Here, 'ave a drink, I know it is scarce to come by on the ship, but you must remember, Jack has to manage two ships now." He said, indicating the smaller ship not so far away on the portside. He had temporarily given control over to Mubbs, just until we arrived in Tortuga and he could find a proper Captain. Though from what I heard, Mubbs would be loathe to give up the ship.

I sipped it, but it burnt my throat.

"Bit strong?" He sniggered.

I threw it back at him, and prepared to walk away.

"Shame what happened to Annamaria, hey?" He asked.

"I beg your pardon." I said, as politely as I could.

"Well, I was jus' sayin'…"

"Oh I know what you were going to say Gibbs. It's quite alright. Everyone else is thinking it, especially Jack, and yet you are the only one who has the guts to say it to my face. You'd rather I'd have died, then Annamaria." I said, laughing insanely.

He moved his feet uncomfortably, and tossed the sail over his shoulder. "I best take this below."

"Don't deny it, will you?" I shouted after him.

He didn't reply, but his silence said more then words ever could. As dignified as I could manage, I turned and ran below to my cabin.

I tried to think sanely, but I couldn't every time a rational thought entered my head it was chased away by the cold dark memory of the gun shot. It seemed now the whole ship was against me, Gibbs made fun of me, and his sharp remarks bit into my head. Jack ignored, and I hadn't seen him for a whole two days.

I lay down on my bed, and shut my eyes, sleep had evaded me that night, and my pillow was still soaking from my tears. My body was so tired, that I gradually drifted into a painful sleep.

As I clambered up groggily, I shivered with the cold, for a summer's day in the Caribbean seas it was awfully chilly, I got up and grabbed my shawl, throwing it over my shoulders, I stepped towards the door. But something beat me there.

The shadowy figure hovered before me, blocking my escape from the cabin. I could make out the sallow, glowing face of Annamaria as she stood before me. Her arm reached out, and passed straight through, I stared into her white eyes in horror.

"You're next." She murmured, happily.

I screamed, and threw myself on to the floor, covering my eyes and ears. The screams did not stop until the cabin door was thrown open and Jack ran in. He lifted me on to the bed, and gently pulled my hands away from my eyes. I was so relieved to see him, that I threw my arms around his neck. He didn't embrace me back.

"What's going on?" He demanded, as half the crew assembled at the cabin door. "Get back to work!" He ordered. The majority of them trundled away, but a few remained put.

"She's here, Jack! She's here in this room."

"There's no one here but you and me."

"She's here!" I yelled.

"Who's here?"

"Annamaria." I said, crying. The tears poured freely down my cheeks, unstopped by Jack. He let me go and stood up angrily.

"Annamaria is dead." He said, bluntly.

"She was here." I told him. "She's going to kill me."

"She's dead." Was Jack's last word as he left the cabin, closing the door behind him.

"She's going to kill me." I whispered after him.

I kicked the door furiously, screaming at the top of my voice. I couldn't get the shadowy image of Annamaria standing in front of the door, putting her arm straight through my body, out of my mind. It seemed to haunt me, even when I closed my eyes. Tired from outburst, I collapsed on to the bed and cried. This time I had really lost Jack, and maybe my sanity with it.