Chapter 6

A Helping of Uncertainty All Round

Previously:

"You think you're his rebound girl?"

"I don't want us to get messed up in it all because there's just no way that we could ever go back. I don't want to be used to make him feel better about himself, to make him feel wanted, because you just don't do that to your best friend."

"Mom, I think you're forgetting one important piece of information. Luke loves you," Rory stated as if it were obvious.

-

"What!?" Lorelai was instantly on edge, her stomach leaping at the very idea. "How do you know that?"

"Calm down, I don't mean he's IN love with you, I mean he loves you like a friend. He cares about you, so I don't think he'd willingly do anything to hurt you," she paused thoughtfully for a moment, "Though you never know, maybe he is in love with you and that's why he's acting so different."

Lorelai was silent for several minutes, digesting this new idea, processing it and trying to figure out how that made her feel. There were still so many conflicting feelings, she couldn't define a single one. She finally spoke, careful about what she revealed.

"Well if that's the case, then it raises a whole other bunch of problems."

"Like what?"

"Like, do I want to risk our friendship for something that might not work out. Like, do I feel the same way as him? Because if not, then I don't see the point, which of course leads to how do I tell him and not hurt him and again, how do we stay friends after something like that?"

"Well come on, how do you feel about Luke?"

"I don't know," Lorelai exhaled in frustration, "I've never thought about it before."

"You cannot seriously tell me you've never thought about Luke as more than a friend."

"No I haven't," Lorelai replied.

"You're lying," Rory taunted.

"I'm not Rory. I'm totally serious. I haven't ever let myself think about it because I wouldn't know what to do with something like that."

"So you're basically saying you're scared," Rory summed it up so easily.

Lorelai was staring blankly at the wall, as though the realisation had just hit her. "Yeah," she replied slowly.

"Ok well, I have one more question for you, then I'll stop bugging you. If you think about the moment you kissed, and forget about everything else, forget that he's your best friend, forget that he's not acting like himself, forget about the possibility that one or both of you could end up hurt, remember how it felt when he kissed you, remember how you reacted, and then tell me this: do you want to kiss him again?"

With almost no hesitation, Lorelai turned and met her daughter's eye, replying simply, "Yes."

---

8 days post kiss, 2pm

Luke was feeling like a caged animal, and he had no idea how to remedy the problem. He had been thinking too much, but without her there to discuss whatever it was that was going on between them, he continued to get more frustrated as each hour passed by.

It was strange not to see her inside the diner every day. There were rrare times where she hadn't been in on a particular day, but she always made up for it the next, coming in at least twice, and sometimes even three ore more times. But for her to skip an entire week meant that there was a serious problem. Not counting last summer when she and Rory had been in Europe, there was only one other instance where she had gone longer than a week without stopping by; that was when they'd had the massive fight over Jess and Rory's car accident.

Though he definitely wouldn't have admitted it at the time, his thoughts clouded as they were by anger, he realised that he had missed her. He was so used to her relentless, pointless chatter that he hadn't known how to entertain himself throughout the day. She made his work more fun, even when she wasn't there, because some useless inanimate object would remind him of one of her random spoken thoughts, and he would smile to himself as he carried on his day.

His mind had been working overtime, trying to figure out when everything had gone from amazing to worse than the hole Hussein was found in. The last time he'd seen her before the previous day had been when he kissed her, and even when he was chasing Kirk, he hadn't been able to wipe the smile from his face.  What else happened that night that made her stay away from him for an entire week?

Had Jason appeared again and actually managed to talk his way back in? Hearing and seeing Lorelai's reaction when he had told her what Jason had said gave him hope that that wasn't the case, but with his track record where Lorelai was concerned easily supported the notion. It seemed that over the last few years at least, that any time he even entertained the idea of telling her how he felt, some other guy had beaten him to the punch and Luke was left standing on the sidelines, watching as all hope of a relationship wandered down the street, holding her hand.

Maybe Jason had shown up again, but he had spooked her out of wanting any kind of relationship for the foreseeable future. He had seemed like an annoyingly persistent jerk, and he knew that could turn any woman off the idea of dating.

Why did he find it all so hard? He knew he wasn't great at admitting his feelings, but it wasn't like he'd let every opportunity pass him by. There had been Rachel – more than once – and Nicole, and.. Lorelai in between all of that. He wanted her more than he'd wanted anything in his life. He wished he could figure this mess out. He thought back to when he had been having trouble with Nicole and Rachel, and how he had managed to straighten out the issue.

It was then that he realised every other time he'd had problems with a woman, Lorelai was the only one who could drag it out of him and then manage to talk some sense into him.

What the hell was he supposed to do now?

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TBC.. please, please review and let me know if you're enjoying it. Am I taking it TOO slowly? I can speed it up if need be, I just thought the tension might be good for a bit first.. kinda build up to the good stuff ;)