Chapter 13: Conversations of the Proud

"Tahl you should have seen him. His skills as a negotiator are astounding. He will make a great Knight." Qui-Gon finished his recap of everything that happened.

Tahl watched as her beloved paced the room excitedly. In her eyes, he reminded her of the young man she hung around during their first years as Padawans. A small smile lighted her features at the memories, enjoying the change that seemed to wash over the man. How she wished it could have been her to bring about such a dramatic alteration of Qui-Gon's perception, but she knew that the Force had wanted the pairing between her love and the captive pirate. Still, she was happy that someone was able to bring back the vibrant man who seemed lost forever when his first Padawan turned. Agreeing, she said, "I'm sure he would have." Her tone was meant to be bright and hopeful, however there was a hidden element of sadness that drifted along the words. Her emotions were mixed and bled into her observation.

It appeared that the Knight picked up on the flux, for he stopped pacing. It was not just her tone that stilled his excitement, but her words as well. Would have, Obi-Wan would have made a great Knight. Reality smacked him in the face again, taunting him with what could have, should have been. Slowly, he made his way over to her and eased himself onto the bed. Regret crept into his weathered features. "Why did I not accept him? Why couldn't I see his potential? Could I have truly been that blind?"

"Oh, Qui-Gon," her gentle voice tried to sooth, "you could not see because you were blinded by love."

His head cocked to the side as he looked at her in confusion, "Love? I do not understand your meaning."

Reaching out a hand she pulled his to her, "You have always allowed your heart to guide you. It is your strength - and your weakness. And when your heart was broken, you denied it everything. Your love was betrayed, and in turn you betrayed your heart."

Qui-Gon started at this absurd narration. "You believe the fall of my former Padawan caused me to be blinded to the will of the Force? That I had forsaken everything I had been taught?"

"No," she disputed. Holding on tight to his hands so that he could not escape, Tahl attempted to elaborate, "I am saying that when Xanatos turned you closed your self off from everything and everyone. You hid within yourself to protect and heal your wounded heart. You did everything in your power to ignore the world around you. To save it from further hurt. And when Master Yoda suggested taking on another Padawan, you didn't want to listen."

Qui-Gon sprang from his seat, managing to break away from her grasp and began pacing again. This time in agitated concentration and not the previous enthusiasm he was in. "So I am self-centered?" he snapped sharply.

Quick to defend herself, she answered, "That's not what I meant. You were hurting. You did what you had to do."

"And by doing so, I have destroyed a young boy's life," he countered. "Is that what a Jedi is supposed to do? To be selfish and ignore the will of the Force because it suits their purpose?"

The conversation had taken a sudden turn Tahl never anticipated. Desperate to reverse the damage she argued, "You're twisting my words. I am not blaming you. I'm just telling you what I saw, my perception of what happened. It was neither right nor wrong."

"Does that matter? By ignoring the Force I have altered its destiny. My own self-interest had overpowered my judgement. And with my lack of judgement I may have brought about serious changes." Qui-Gon was caught up in this new ascertainment, showing him the errs of his past in a new light.

Tahl hesitated for only a moment before getting to her feet and approaching the man. Her hand came up to cup his chin. Softening her tone, the Knight stroked the bristles at the edge of his face. "But we don't know if those changes will be for better or worse."

The weariness in his voice struck her as he posed, "Could denying a Padawanship which forced a child into a harmful situation be deemed anything but detrimental?"

Taking a step back, Tahl maneuvered herself in front of him, a new spark lit her gold and green striped eyes, "You were not the only one involved with that decision. I will not let you shoulder the burden alone. The Council sent him away, not you. He was not chosen by another Master and that is not your fault either."

Despondency consumed the clear blue gaze of her love. "But I was his last chance, and I dismissed him so easily. I cannot deny that I am partially to blame." Qui-Gon allowed his guilt to surface for a moment. Not wishing to afflict his counterpart with such onus, he turned away.

There was silence for a time, while they sorted through the storm of emotions that coursed through the room. At last, she agreed regretfully, "No, I suppose you couldn't." Qui-Gon was always strong-willed and when he believed something wholeheartedly, there was little anyone could do to change that belief. Quietly, she pleaded with the Force to show him that self-recrimination would not change the past.

Maybe he heard her plea, or saw the light himself, for he sighed and continued, "The past is the past and is unchangeable. I can only look toward the future now."

The dwindling ember of hope ignited again. Tahl moved to stand behind him, "That is all any of us can do."

His back was to her still as he spoke, "The Force brought us together again, and I will not miss its calling a second time. Despite possible opposition, I will do everything in my power to right the wrong done against him." Turning to face her, he added with a conviction she had not seen before, "Obi-Wan will be a Jedi Knight."

Stunned, Tahl gazed upon the leonine features etched with determination and cautioned, "You cannot guarantee that. The Council will still have to make the final decision."

"If they are indeed wise, then they will make the correct one. He will be a Jedi." Qui-Gon easily trusted in the Force to make amends and that the Council would as well. They cannot fault Obi-Wan for something he could not control.

But Tahl was not finished, "Don't forget his deal. Not only do you have to contend with the Council, you will have to wait for the Courts to decide as well."

This new warning seemed to hit it's mark, and at this Qui-Gon's confidence faltered. He knew that there were obstacles, but he believed the Force would guide them through as well. He would have to bide his time to see what is to come. "That is true. Perhaps I will speak to the Council about that as well." Yes, he thought, perhaps the Council will know of a way around that too. Maybe they could get Obi-Wan to be released to their care. It was a fleeting hope but an option none the less.

Recognizing his acceptance of reality that they face, the Knight offered one last piece of advice, "Try not to get your self in too much trouble."

The playful hint in her voice made him raise an eyebrow to her. "Why would you say that? Do you think me consistently in situations beyond my control?"

A quirky smirk lit her beautiful face, "No, but I think you can definitely create a few with minimal effort." Lightening the mood with her gentle mockery, Tahl fell into the embrace of her love.

Grinning, he wrapped his arms around the one person that knew him too well. "That's unfair. I….." Qui-Gon paused and looked about. A fraction of a second later she felt it as well. His tone sobered, "They have returned. We shall see if his Captain will even accept the terms now."

Slightly chilled by the uncertainty of their future, Tahl squeezed tenderly. "Do you think he will?"

It took a minute for Qui-Gon to answer when finally he said, "If I were in his place - I wouldn't." Silence clung to the room, creating a deep sense of uneasiness. Yet something whispered to the tall Knight. Not able to discern actual words, he was able to understand its meaning. "However, I have a feeling that he will be persuaded somehow."

Nodding almost imperceptibly, Tahl answered, "I hope he does. The children are getting anxious. I've had Bant concentrating on them, to keep them calm, and helping out Adi and Siri until everything is sorted out. I think some of them suspect that we are stranded."

Qui-Gon readily agreed, "Some of them are very perceptive, it is to be expected."

"If the pirates do provide us transport, I think we will need to keep a close eye on that co-pilot, Griven. I don't think he, or his friends, will be pleased about accepting a ride from them."

"That is most assuredly true. I will have a word with the Captain to ensure they are kept in check." Qui-Gon's tone hardened, "I will not permit another incident like we had in the rec room."

Tahl shivered. From the recounts of her Padawan, Adi and little Tola, she could only imagine the horror that they witnessed. "The thought of what happened still weighs heavily on my heart."

"As it does mine. As a result, I have sworn to Obi-Wan's Captain that I will protect him with my life and that is what I intend to do."

Breaking from the shelter of his arms, she urged, "Be careful. I sense a darkness along the horizon. I cannot get a clear picture but am certain it pertains to Obi-Wan."

"I sense it as well. I will have to keep a close eye on him," the smooth baritone tried to reassure.

"That should not be difficult while aboard their ship. We might even get a better idea of his world while we journey. Maybe you should try and speak with the Captain alone to learn more about Obi-Wan's past." Her suggestion seemed logical however unlikely.

"I do not think that speaking with him alone would be such a good idea in light of our last encounter." Qui-Gon remembered vividly the only time they had met and fought the impulse to touch his forehead.

But Tahl's thoughts drifted along a different path than Qui-Gon's. "Obi-Wan's experience must have been horrible for even a Pirate to react so rashly."

The thought had already entered his mind, bringing him back to that well hidden trace of guilt. "Or I could have deserved it. I cannot imagine what must have happened to the boy for Tuuvu, I believe, to attack me. But every time I sense Obi-Wan's mind brush close to certain memories, I can feel him cringe." It was an observation he made early on, but was not absolutely sure of. A vacant look would wash over the young face as if trying to protect itself from feeling again. He wished there was some way he could take all the pain away.

Tahl's saddened words cut through his thoughts. "It is deplorable that anyone should treat a child so wrongly. And something one so young should never have to experience."

"I thank the Force that his Captain was able to change that." Qui-Gon's voice was steady, but she still heard the slight quiver of regret.

"Yes." Drifting in the solitude of their mind, both tried to imagine what cruel things the youth had been put through. But from the disgusting things they had witnessed over their missions, they quickly decided to let it alone. A few minutes passed before Tahl spoke again, "What do you think of this device the engineers found?" She felt a strong need to change the subject, knowing that someday they would find out.

"I don't know," the Knight answered hesitantly. Qui-Gon's brow creased at the idea of a saboteur. "There's something - familiar - about it, but I can not place my finger on it."

Tahl offered, "Perchance you are diverting too much concentration on the situation with Obi-Wan."

"It is highly likely," the large Jedi also surmised this possibility. "But there is something incredibly illusive about that problem. Maybe when the investigators are able to learn more, I will discover what it is."

"We will have to wait until we can get a crew here to retrieve the ship before the investigators are able to begin." Always practical, Tahl knew what steps would have to be taken before they would receive any answers.

"Then we should prepare ourselves for that wait," Qui-Gon stated, matter-of-factly. "There is too much happening right now and we will have to take one piece of the puzzle at a time." Something passed behind the cerulean gaze.

Tahl inquired, "What is it?"

His mind brushed the edges of Obi-wan's consciousness. He wasn't sure if the youth had reached out to him or perhaps they were simply attuned to the other, but he could not mistake who it was. He could sense resignation across the fragile bond yet he understood exactly what happened. "I believe their Captain has said yes."

Shocked by this declaration, Tahl gasped, "Really?"

Knowing time was short, the Knight headed for the door. "I must go. I must speak with Obi-Wan."

"I'll be waiting," she called after the retreating figure. She did not doubt his word, but it just seemed so unlikely that the Pirate Captain would give up the youth so easily. But she also knew Qui-Gon would learn as to why.

***

Qui-Gon hurried through the halls trying to catch up to the youth. At a juncture close to the engineering room, he saw the young man walk past. "Obi-Wan," he called.

The young corsair halted but did not turn to face him. "I was wondering how long it would take you to come."

Striding over, Qui-Gon came up behind the young man. "I granted you the chance to speak with your Captain privately, but that was all."

"I know, and I thank you for that much." There was something in the rogue's posture that gave Qui-Gon pause. The soft cultured voice was laden with a profound sense of regret and a hint of self-loathing.

Not entirely understanding the cause, Qui-Gon inquired, "Is something wrong?" He reached out to place a comforting hand on the young pirate's shoulder but hesitated just above.

You mean besides betraying the one being who's given a damn about me? He berated inwardly. But that way his choice and he knew it. His decision to make and he would have to bare the consequences no matter what. And it was his burden to carry; alone. "Nothing you need to concern yourself about. Just get those initiates ready to leave." His resolve began to falter under the weight of said self-affliction.

However the soft response did nothing to alleviate Qui-Gon's concern. His hand still hovering just above the sagging shoulder, the Knight was urged to continue his quest. "So your Captain has agreed to all the provisions of our arrangement?" It was the only thing he knew that could possibly be the cause of such distress, so he pressed the subject.

"Not exactly," Obi-Wan proffered hesitantly.

Finally, the hovering hand rested upon the youth's shoulder. Qui-Gon quickly ascertained what was upsetting Obi-Wan so, "You did not tell him about your sacrifice, did you?"

Surprise washed though him for a moment at his acceptance to the comforting touch. Quickly replaced by the slow dissolve of his strength, and his voice wavered, "No, I did not." The deception was obviously taking its toll on the pirate. For a moment, Obi-Wan thought it possible he could share this heavy heart with another. But he knew it was futile, no one else would understand the position he was in and that's the way it had to stay. New life burned inside of him. He needed to be strong, strong enough to go through what must be done. He would need the will to carry on for both he and Tuuvu. Suddenly, his slumped shoulders stiffened and his posture changed. Whirling around he glared up at the Knight, "And he mustn't know until it's too late. Promise me he won't know until it's too late."

Qui-Gon was taken aback slightly by the abrupt change, releasing his grip. "He has a right to kn…."

"No!" he shouted. "He can't know. Not yet. Promise me, Master Jinn, please." Desperation laced his tone.

There was nothing else he could do, so Qui-Gon nodded. He knew that this was the only way top appease the distraught visage before him. If he must play a part in this deception, he would do so for Obi-Wan's sake. He had already pledged himself to the boy and he will do everything in his power to ease the burden.

The quick blaze in the murky depths of his eyes slowly simmered down. Wearily, he acknowledged Qui-Gon's nod. "Thank you, Master Jinn." Taking a moment to recompose himself before facing his Patron again, Obi-Wan began to leave when he noticed Qui-Gon following. "Is there something else?"

"No."

"Then why are you following?" Obi-Wan asked suspiciously.

"Because, I am going with you." When it appeared that Obi-Wan was about to object, Qui-Gon immediately added, "You have completed your private discussion which means you are back under my care. And that means that I will be your constant companion from here on."

Sighing, Obi-Wan knew it was pointless to argue. He remembered from his days as an Initiate a few stories of the Knight's obstinacy. Yet he also knew Tuuvu's dislike for the Knight, which prompted him to warn, "I do not think that is wise."

"Never-the-less, I am coming with you." Qui-Gon reiterated. He had felt the same way after the encounter with the Pirate Captain. However, he did make a promise to protect the boy with his life, and he thought this the only way to prove that he was willing to risk personal danger to do so.

Not in the mood to fight again, Obi-Wan conceded, "So be it. We best hurry, Tuuvu's waiting." Together the pair headed back out to the waiting family.

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Well, here's your post for this week. I hope it wasn't too boring. And don't forget about those reviews!!! They keep me motivated!!! Motivation = more posts!! ;)

Oh, and if you're interested, I finally was able to get my website up. It's rather easy to find. ;) www.arldetta.com Tell me what you think. :D Thanks.

Shanobi - Thank you so much for constant support. And I'm glad you popped in too. Yes, I tend to really embellish my roughs. ;) Don't worry about the spelling. Only I have to worry about that. LOL. Yes, I thought it would add a bit more insight to how much Tuuvu trusts Obi.

Yes, they are finally getting back to the issues and guarding their emotions mostly. And I can't wait to get to some other confrontations later. ;) But I will be dropping hints here and there about Tuuvu/Obi/Drrov's past. Although, it might end up bringing this fic up to an "R" rating. But we'll have to see about that. ]:)

Banshee Fay - Thanks! I will do my best. ;)

Liyanette - Thank you so much. It did take me a while. ;) Glad it came out decent.

CassandraD - Aww, but where would be the fun in that? :p He'll find out soon enough.

Meggie - Well, I am glad I have kept up with my chars. I would hate to mess them up too much. ;) We'll see what happens with Obi. And as long as there is no hungry dog talks, we should be good with regular updates. ;)

Death Rider - AAAWWWW!!!! :8} Thank you soooo much. I really, really appreciate that!! :D :D Now, you shush missy. Don't go giving all the other readers ideas. ;) LOL. You'll have to wait and see what happens.

Random HP Fan - Gosh, don't worry about it. I'm just ecstatic you review at all. :D Yes, Obi is special. And their relationship is different that what Qui and Obi have in the JA books. You'll just have to wait and see how Yoda and the rest of the Council will react. I hope you like it. Thanks!! :D