Second Chances: Moment of Clarity
Quietly Jason pulled on his jeans as he watched Elizabeth sleeping soundly on the sofa. He reached over and drew the thin cotton throw over her shoulders his fingers making contact with her alabaster skin. He saw the corners of her mouth curve and he too smiled. Kneeling down he gazed at her still unable to believe what he had done to deserve her. His mind was taken back to making love to her last night. Those images bombarded him so much so that he had difficulty resisting the urge to wake her up and do it all over again.
Everything seemed so much simpler when they were in her studio. It had been that way after he had been shot. It was as though the rest of the world had fallen away leaving only he and she. He enjoyed that feeling. He relished the idea of it being just the two of them. As unlikely of a notion as it was, he still craved it. Gently Jason leaned in and brushed his lips against her cheek. He wanted to spend a little longer in the fantasy world they had created for themselves here in the cocoon of the tiny studio.
He leaned against the cold white brick wall and stared out the window at the spot where the Corinthos-Morgan warehouse used to stand. Now it was nothing but a pile of smoldering rubble. He had lost count of how many times that very building had been reconstructed or how much money they had spent upgrading security to still end up trapped between its burning walls. Jason knew it was an occupational hazard and for himself he could live with it. But when he allowed himself to glance at Elizabeth's sleeping form he was less than sure. How many times could he make her a target or let her sit at home worrying if she would ever see him again? Her desperate pleas for him not to push her away again picked at him. Jason felt like he was being torn in two and one part was foreign to him – it was the part that was letting his heart rule his good judgement. His heart wouldn't – couldn't give her up no matter the danger.
He watched as she stirred a bit on the small sofa her chestnut curls fell haphazardly across her cheek. Jason felt his breath catch in his throat. He couldn't leave her not even if he tried. No matter if she was with him or not, Elizabeth had a piece of him and even when he tried to hide it his feelings came through loud and clear. Deep down he knew she was safer with him than without him. He was just sorry it had taken so many years for him to see it for himself.
"Elizabeth," he whispered in her ear. "Baby, it's time to get up," he said with very little conviction in his voice.
"Ummmmm."
"Hey sleepy." He smiled when she finally opened her azure eyes.
"Morning," she purred reaching up and pulling his mouth to hers. The simple action had Jason wanting to strip and join her beneath the blanket. But he knew that wasn't an option. He had to start investigating exactly what happened yesterday at the warehouse that caused the fire. Not that he didn't already have a few theories brewing in his brain.
"You ready to go home?" he asked tracing the features of her face with his finger.
"Not yet," she smiled sheepishly pulling him toward her. She cocked her brow as she began undoing the buttons on his jeans as she had the night before. Jason shook his head and returned her seductive smile before crawling under the covers – the thoughts of the fire and how it started getting lost in the depths of ecstasy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonny stood watching Carly and Michael sleeping peacefully in the middle of their king size bed. He had been standing guard over them for the better part of the night not being able to sleep himself. He had far too many thoughts swirling around his head. He had insisted that they go to the hospital last night not for himself but for Carly. He knew the stress of having to watch the warehouse burning again with him inside could have caused her to go into labor prematurely. He was relieved when Dr. Meadows told them that everything was fine not even a hint of any contractions. Somehow though once they got back to the penthouse Sonny couldn't help but worry. Even after her pleadings for him to come to bed with her he couldn't. He was stuck in the mind set that he wasn't worthy of the family he had. He couldn't get passed the fact the he felt undeserving of all the things that graced his life. Things like money and power came easily but when it had to do with love and family those were a struggle.
Sonny closed the door to the bedroom as the sun began its climb into the morning sky. He made his way down the stairs to the main living space of the penthouse and went to the French doors that showcased the Port Charles skyline. Sonny looked out over the cityscape. In the distance he could vaguely make out the wisps of smoke that still hung in the air from last nights fire. He closed his eyes and hung his head low recalling the event. But rather than the fire his mind centered on his argument with Jason. For months now they had been grousing at one another and while it made him physically sick he couldn't find a way to stop the endless fighting. In all actuality he knew how to end it – eliminate Ric.
Sonny thought about all of the offenses his half brother committed against his family. Ric hadn't even had the balls to come at Sonny directly but rather he had gone through his family – his wife to get at him. Sonny tried not to think about the hell that Carly had gone through while she was chained to that wall in panic room. It amazed him how strong she had been. How she had done everything in her power to keep their unborn child safe. She was the strongest woman he had ever known. So why couldn't he be as strong? Why couldn't he just give the order? Why couldn't he just tell Jason to exterminate the pest from all of their lives? Why? That single word haunted Sonny.
In the back of his mind he knew why and the reason stared back at him from the dark eyes of a picture of his mother. He hadn't been able to protect her all those years ago from Deke. Had Ric's tale of Adella's choosing Sonny over him been the reason she had had such a horrible life at Deke's hand? Had it really been his fault for all of the horrible things she had suffered through?
Sonny shook his head and squared his shoulders not wanting to relive a past he could do nothing about. But the future that was something he could change. He needed to talk to Jason. He needed to make his long time friend understand.
Sonny nodded to Johnny as he walked toward Jason's penthouse. Just when he reached the elevator the door slid open and Elizabeth and Jason stepped out arms wrapped securely around each other's waists.
"Sonny," Jason said a little surprised to see him standing right there.
"Jase."
"How are you?" Elizabeth questioned instantly feeling Jason's body fill with tension.
"I'm good."
"And Carly?" she continued.
"She's fine. Sleeping with Michael right now."
"I'm glad both of you are good." Elizabeth smiled.
"Jason, I need to talk to you," Sonny announced.
Jason hung his head wishing that he and Elizabeth had taken refuge in her studio for a little while longer. "I'll won't be long," he said to her.
"I'll go grab a shower. I have the late shift today," she answered. "Tell Carly that I'll see her later."
"I will. Let's go inside." He turned to Jason indicating he follow him to penthouse four.
Jason looked at Johnny before entering behind Sonny. The guard gave Jason a knowing smile. It seemed as though everyone in the organization wished that the boss would just wise up and get rid of Ric Lansing.
"You want a drink?" Sonny asked as Jason closed the door leaving Johnny standing on the other side.
"No," Jason answered dropping his leather jacket on the nearest chair. He stood there silent as Sonny poured himself a glass of scotch. He had decided that he was done arguing and would let Sonny get to whatever it was he thought he needed to say.
Sonny brought the rim of the glass to his lips but his eyes met Jason's hard stare. He hadn't seen those formidable cold eyes in years. He hadn't seen them since the day that Jason told him to never speak to him again about what had happened between him and Carly. It had taken years for things between the pair to return to normal but now Sonny found them back in the same position.
"What did you need to talk to me about?" Jason finally asked.
"I wanted to thank you."
"What?"
"Thank you for coming to find me in the fire. I mean with the way we have been lately...."
"What?" Jason cut him off.
"It's just that you and I are at odds at every turn....."
"What – you thought I would leave you in there to burn to death?" Jason was appalled that Sonny thought that little of him.
"Yes.....no! I mean you didn't even know that I was still in the warehouse but you stuck around to find out. You didn't have to do that." Sonny made an attempt at backpedaling knowing by the look on Jason's face that he had again stuck his foot in his mouth.
"What do you mean I didn't have to do that? Sonny ..." Jason didn't even know what to say.
"I just wanted to let you know how thankful I am."
"How could you even think that I would leave you in the building to burn to death?" Jason couldn't get passed that Sonny would even think that. "I don't care what the hell we have been fighting about. I WOULDN'T do that – not to you and not to Carly and Michael."
"Jason, that's not what I meant," Sonny said desperately trying to stop the train wreck he had just set in motion.
"Then what did you mean?"
Sonny was at a loss for words. He didn't have a comeback for that question. What had he meant? He didn't really think that Jason would let his differing opinion stop from him doing his job. "Well I know it's your job to protect me and my interests."
"It's more than a job, Sonny." But even as Jason said that he was beginning to wonder if he hadn't placed too much stock in his friendship with the Mob boss. Maybe when he couldn't give the man blind obedience he had lost his usefulness.
"I know it is," Sonny said wishing he could stop himself from talking.
"I don't think you do. I think that you don't like what I have to say lately so it's easier for you to see me as an employee that you can order around. I haven't been that person in years Sonny."
"Jason, this doesn't have anything to do with Ric."
"Everything has something to do with him!" Jason shouted. "The minute he came to Port Charles and tried to be your attorney it's been about him – about his vendetta – about his need for revenge – about his need to have so many things that aren't his."
Jason immediately thought about Elizabeth. He thought about all the things that Ric had done to her in the name of love – all the things he was still doing even though Sonny couldn't see it or wouldn't admit it. "It's all about Ric!"
How had a simple thank you turned into yet another tiresome argument about Ric Lansing? "Jason, can't we please not do this again. You know my thoughts on Ric..."
"And you know mine!" Jason said harshly interrupting him before grabbing his jacket and slamming the door behind him.
"You are unbelievable you know that?"
Sonny turned his head and saw his wife's furious face as she descended the stairs. "Carly please be careful!" he said heading to the stairs to help her take the last few steps.
"Don't...don't change the subject. Don't make this about me suddenly when it's so about you Sonny."
"Remember Dr. Meadows said to avoid stress," he continued as though he hadn't heard her speaking.
"Given the bull headed man I am married to I find that pretty tough."
"Will you at least sit down, please?"
"Sonny, what were you thinking?"
"I was thinking I wanted to offer thanks to Jason."
"And you think that's what you did? You basically said that you didn't think he would've looked for you because the two of you don't see eye to eye on what the hell to do with Ric Lansing. My god Sonny, how could you think that Jason would let you burn to death?" Carly couldn't warp her mind on that thought, not even a tiny piece of it.
"That's not what I said."
"The hell it isn't! You said it over and over again. You treated him like he was some hired hand not the man who's been our friend even when we didn't much deserve it!"
Sonny looked away from his wife unable to meet her gaze. For once he knew Carly spoke the truth and that frightened him more than he expected. It was rare that she was the voice of reason. "I don't treat Jason like a hired hand."
"When it comes to Ric you do. You expect him to put aside all of the things he feels for the man that's not only terrorized me but Elizabeth too."
"I'm still the boss," Sonny said stating the obvious.
"You are totally beyond belief, Sonny!" Carly shouted as she headed for the door.
"Where are you going?"
"Out!" she spat unable to continue having this pointless conversation with her husband.
Sonny watched as Carly strode passed Johnny in a huff. The guard and the mob boss locked eyes and spoke to one another with not a single word, however Johnny O'Brien knew that his job was to keep Mrs. Corinthos safe. Sonny closed the door of his penthouse when Carly and Johnny disappeared into the elevator.
Filling his highball glass again he allowed his physically and emotionally spent body to fall against the velveteen fabric of the sofa. The knocking from the other side of the door startled his eyes open. "What?" he said when another wave of knocking began.
"Mr. Corinthos, it's John Simon. I have some information for you about the fire at your warehouse."
Sonny pulled himself up from his resting place and walked over to the door ushering the other man inside. John Simon was one of the many men Sonny had on his payroll inside the ranks of PCPD. "Well?" Sonny asked impatiently.
"Here." John Simon handed over a plain manila folder. "It's being ruled arson."
"Like that's a surprise," Sonny scoffed opening the folder eyeing the documents inside. "You can go now," he said staring at the man standing in the middle of his living room.
Sonny sat down on the sofa as the door clicked closed in the background. As he continued reading the reports. He couldn't believe his eyes. According to the records the fire was started by something as simple as gasoline soaked rags. Certainly nothing as high tech as he had experienced with the previous fires and explosions. It was a single line that befuddled Sonny – unable to believe what it said. There was a black silk scarf found close to the scene with the monogrammed initials FR on it. He immediately flashed back to his earlier conversation with Jason from the other day. A conversation about Faith and ultimately a conversation about Ric.
Sonny picked up the phone and dialed the number of the guard he had placed on Faith Roscoe. "How's our house guest?" he asked.
Sonny listened as he was told all that he needed to know – that Faith had been taken out of commission some time ago. Again his eyes scanned the papers laying before him all of sudden being forced to rethink all that he wanted to be true. He placed the receiver in its cradle and leaned against the desk allowing it all to sink in. No matter what the fire report wanted him to believe Sonny knew that Faith's scarf was a plant to throw him off course. To throw him off of the track that Jason had always been on – Ric Lansing.
Quietly Jason pulled on his jeans as he watched Elizabeth sleeping soundly on the sofa. He reached over and drew the thin cotton throw over her shoulders his fingers making contact with her alabaster skin. He saw the corners of her mouth curve and he too smiled. Kneeling down he gazed at her still unable to believe what he had done to deserve her. His mind was taken back to making love to her last night. Those images bombarded him so much so that he had difficulty resisting the urge to wake her up and do it all over again.
Everything seemed so much simpler when they were in her studio. It had been that way after he had been shot. It was as though the rest of the world had fallen away leaving only he and she. He enjoyed that feeling. He relished the idea of it being just the two of them. As unlikely of a notion as it was, he still craved it. Gently Jason leaned in and brushed his lips against her cheek. He wanted to spend a little longer in the fantasy world they had created for themselves here in the cocoon of the tiny studio.
He leaned against the cold white brick wall and stared out the window at the spot where the Corinthos-Morgan warehouse used to stand. Now it was nothing but a pile of smoldering rubble. He had lost count of how many times that very building had been reconstructed or how much money they had spent upgrading security to still end up trapped between its burning walls. Jason knew it was an occupational hazard and for himself he could live with it. But when he allowed himself to glance at Elizabeth's sleeping form he was less than sure. How many times could he make her a target or let her sit at home worrying if she would ever see him again? Her desperate pleas for him not to push her away again picked at him. Jason felt like he was being torn in two and one part was foreign to him – it was the part that was letting his heart rule his good judgement. His heart wouldn't – couldn't give her up no matter the danger.
He watched as she stirred a bit on the small sofa her chestnut curls fell haphazardly across her cheek. Jason felt his breath catch in his throat. He couldn't leave her not even if he tried. No matter if she was with him or not, Elizabeth had a piece of him and even when he tried to hide it his feelings came through loud and clear. Deep down he knew she was safer with him than without him. He was just sorry it had taken so many years for him to see it for himself.
"Elizabeth," he whispered in her ear. "Baby, it's time to get up," he said with very little conviction in his voice.
"Ummmmm."
"Hey sleepy." He smiled when she finally opened her azure eyes.
"Morning," she purred reaching up and pulling his mouth to hers. The simple action had Jason wanting to strip and join her beneath the blanket. But he knew that wasn't an option. He had to start investigating exactly what happened yesterday at the warehouse that caused the fire. Not that he didn't already have a few theories brewing in his brain.
"You ready to go home?" he asked tracing the features of her face with his finger.
"Not yet," she smiled sheepishly pulling him toward her. She cocked her brow as she began undoing the buttons on his jeans as she had the night before. Jason shook his head and returned her seductive smile before crawling under the covers – the thoughts of the fire and how it started getting lost in the depths of ecstasy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonny stood watching Carly and Michael sleeping peacefully in the middle of their king size bed. He had been standing guard over them for the better part of the night not being able to sleep himself. He had far too many thoughts swirling around his head. He had insisted that they go to the hospital last night not for himself but for Carly. He knew the stress of having to watch the warehouse burning again with him inside could have caused her to go into labor prematurely. He was relieved when Dr. Meadows told them that everything was fine not even a hint of any contractions. Somehow though once they got back to the penthouse Sonny couldn't help but worry. Even after her pleadings for him to come to bed with her he couldn't. He was stuck in the mind set that he wasn't worthy of the family he had. He couldn't get passed the fact the he felt undeserving of all the things that graced his life. Things like money and power came easily but when it had to do with love and family those were a struggle.
Sonny closed the door to the bedroom as the sun began its climb into the morning sky. He made his way down the stairs to the main living space of the penthouse and went to the French doors that showcased the Port Charles skyline. Sonny looked out over the cityscape. In the distance he could vaguely make out the wisps of smoke that still hung in the air from last nights fire. He closed his eyes and hung his head low recalling the event. But rather than the fire his mind centered on his argument with Jason. For months now they had been grousing at one another and while it made him physically sick he couldn't find a way to stop the endless fighting. In all actuality he knew how to end it – eliminate Ric.
Sonny thought about all of the offenses his half brother committed against his family. Ric hadn't even had the balls to come at Sonny directly but rather he had gone through his family – his wife to get at him. Sonny tried not to think about the hell that Carly had gone through while she was chained to that wall in panic room. It amazed him how strong she had been. How she had done everything in her power to keep their unborn child safe. She was the strongest woman he had ever known. So why couldn't he be as strong? Why couldn't he just give the order? Why couldn't he just tell Jason to exterminate the pest from all of their lives? Why? That single word haunted Sonny.
In the back of his mind he knew why and the reason stared back at him from the dark eyes of a picture of his mother. He hadn't been able to protect her all those years ago from Deke. Had Ric's tale of Adella's choosing Sonny over him been the reason she had had such a horrible life at Deke's hand? Had it really been his fault for all of the horrible things she had suffered through?
Sonny shook his head and squared his shoulders not wanting to relive a past he could do nothing about. But the future that was something he could change. He needed to talk to Jason. He needed to make his long time friend understand.
Sonny nodded to Johnny as he walked toward Jason's penthouse. Just when he reached the elevator the door slid open and Elizabeth and Jason stepped out arms wrapped securely around each other's waists.
"Sonny," Jason said a little surprised to see him standing right there.
"Jase."
"How are you?" Elizabeth questioned instantly feeling Jason's body fill with tension.
"I'm good."
"And Carly?" she continued.
"She's fine. Sleeping with Michael right now."
"I'm glad both of you are good." Elizabeth smiled.
"Jason, I need to talk to you," Sonny announced.
Jason hung his head wishing that he and Elizabeth had taken refuge in her studio for a little while longer. "I'll won't be long," he said to her.
"I'll go grab a shower. I have the late shift today," she answered. "Tell Carly that I'll see her later."
"I will. Let's go inside." He turned to Jason indicating he follow him to penthouse four.
Jason looked at Johnny before entering behind Sonny. The guard gave Jason a knowing smile. It seemed as though everyone in the organization wished that the boss would just wise up and get rid of Ric Lansing.
"You want a drink?" Sonny asked as Jason closed the door leaving Johnny standing on the other side.
"No," Jason answered dropping his leather jacket on the nearest chair. He stood there silent as Sonny poured himself a glass of scotch. He had decided that he was done arguing and would let Sonny get to whatever it was he thought he needed to say.
Sonny brought the rim of the glass to his lips but his eyes met Jason's hard stare. He hadn't seen those formidable cold eyes in years. He hadn't seen them since the day that Jason told him to never speak to him again about what had happened between him and Carly. It had taken years for things between the pair to return to normal but now Sonny found them back in the same position.
"What did you need to talk to me about?" Jason finally asked.
"I wanted to thank you."
"What?"
"Thank you for coming to find me in the fire. I mean with the way we have been lately...."
"What?" Jason cut him off.
"It's just that you and I are at odds at every turn....."
"What – you thought I would leave you in there to burn to death?" Jason was appalled that Sonny thought that little of him.
"Yes.....no! I mean you didn't even know that I was still in the warehouse but you stuck around to find out. You didn't have to do that." Sonny made an attempt at backpedaling knowing by the look on Jason's face that he had again stuck his foot in his mouth.
"What do you mean I didn't have to do that? Sonny ..." Jason didn't even know what to say.
"I just wanted to let you know how thankful I am."
"How could you even think that I would leave you in the building to burn to death?" Jason couldn't get passed that Sonny would even think that. "I don't care what the hell we have been fighting about. I WOULDN'T do that – not to you and not to Carly and Michael."
"Jason, that's not what I meant," Sonny said desperately trying to stop the train wreck he had just set in motion.
"Then what did you mean?"
Sonny was at a loss for words. He didn't have a comeback for that question. What had he meant? He didn't really think that Jason would let his differing opinion stop from him doing his job. "Well I know it's your job to protect me and my interests."
"It's more than a job, Sonny." But even as Jason said that he was beginning to wonder if he hadn't placed too much stock in his friendship with the Mob boss. Maybe when he couldn't give the man blind obedience he had lost his usefulness.
"I know it is," Sonny said wishing he could stop himself from talking.
"I don't think you do. I think that you don't like what I have to say lately so it's easier for you to see me as an employee that you can order around. I haven't been that person in years Sonny."
"Jason, this doesn't have anything to do with Ric."
"Everything has something to do with him!" Jason shouted. "The minute he came to Port Charles and tried to be your attorney it's been about him – about his vendetta – about his need for revenge – about his need to have so many things that aren't his."
Jason immediately thought about Elizabeth. He thought about all the things that Ric had done to her in the name of love – all the things he was still doing even though Sonny couldn't see it or wouldn't admit it. "It's all about Ric!"
How had a simple thank you turned into yet another tiresome argument about Ric Lansing? "Jason, can't we please not do this again. You know my thoughts on Ric..."
"And you know mine!" Jason said harshly interrupting him before grabbing his jacket and slamming the door behind him.
"You are unbelievable you know that?"
Sonny turned his head and saw his wife's furious face as she descended the stairs. "Carly please be careful!" he said heading to the stairs to help her take the last few steps.
"Don't...don't change the subject. Don't make this about me suddenly when it's so about you Sonny."
"Remember Dr. Meadows said to avoid stress," he continued as though he hadn't heard her speaking.
"Given the bull headed man I am married to I find that pretty tough."
"Will you at least sit down, please?"
"Sonny, what were you thinking?"
"I was thinking I wanted to offer thanks to Jason."
"And you think that's what you did? You basically said that you didn't think he would've looked for you because the two of you don't see eye to eye on what the hell to do with Ric Lansing. My god Sonny, how could you think that Jason would let you burn to death?" Carly couldn't warp her mind on that thought, not even a tiny piece of it.
"That's not what I said."
"The hell it isn't! You said it over and over again. You treated him like he was some hired hand not the man who's been our friend even when we didn't much deserve it!"
Sonny looked away from his wife unable to meet her gaze. For once he knew Carly spoke the truth and that frightened him more than he expected. It was rare that she was the voice of reason. "I don't treat Jason like a hired hand."
"When it comes to Ric you do. You expect him to put aside all of the things he feels for the man that's not only terrorized me but Elizabeth too."
"I'm still the boss," Sonny said stating the obvious.
"You are totally beyond belief, Sonny!" Carly shouted as she headed for the door.
"Where are you going?"
"Out!" she spat unable to continue having this pointless conversation with her husband.
Sonny watched as Carly strode passed Johnny in a huff. The guard and the mob boss locked eyes and spoke to one another with not a single word, however Johnny O'Brien knew that his job was to keep Mrs. Corinthos safe. Sonny closed the door of his penthouse when Carly and Johnny disappeared into the elevator.
Filling his highball glass again he allowed his physically and emotionally spent body to fall against the velveteen fabric of the sofa. The knocking from the other side of the door startled his eyes open. "What?" he said when another wave of knocking began.
"Mr. Corinthos, it's John Simon. I have some information for you about the fire at your warehouse."
Sonny pulled himself up from his resting place and walked over to the door ushering the other man inside. John Simon was one of the many men Sonny had on his payroll inside the ranks of PCPD. "Well?" Sonny asked impatiently.
"Here." John Simon handed over a plain manila folder. "It's being ruled arson."
"Like that's a surprise," Sonny scoffed opening the folder eyeing the documents inside. "You can go now," he said staring at the man standing in the middle of his living room.
Sonny sat down on the sofa as the door clicked closed in the background. As he continued reading the reports. He couldn't believe his eyes. According to the records the fire was started by something as simple as gasoline soaked rags. Certainly nothing as high tech as he had experienced with the previous fires and explosions. It was a single line that befuddled Sonny – unable to believe what it said. There was a black silk scarf found close to the scene with the monogrammed initials FR on it. He immediately flashed back to his earlier conversation with Jason from the other day. A conversation about Faith and ultimately a conversation about Ric.
Sonny picked up the phone and dialed the number of the guard he had placed on Faith Roscoe. "How's our house guest?" he asked.
Sonny listened as he was told all that he needed to know – that Faith had been taken out of commission some time ago. Again his eyes scanned the papers laying before him all of sudden being forced to rethink all that he wanted to be true. He placed the receiver in its cradle and leaned against the desk allowing it all to sink in. No matter what the fire report wanted him to believe Sonny knew that Faith's scarf was a plant to throw him off course. To throw him off of the track that Jason had always been on – Ric Lansing.