Author's Note: Here we are it's the fourth chapter, of pure adultery fun! Well maybe not that adultery, but you catch my drift. This song here is one of my ultra fave. So thank goodness someone requested it. Anyways next on the Link mockery playlist it's "Maybe Katie." And "All the Small Things." Await for that. Now to the bat mobile. So any suggestions for a song to spoof with Link involved please review and mention the song's name along with the artist who sings it (Gotta give credit you know?). Until then. I will be adding more songs once I reorganize the fun lyrics. Note: All these songs are cheesy, extremely perverted (my entire fault) and incredibly lame in every way.
Disclaimer: Of course Aerosmith is an awesome band. They lead singer is fine a hell too, but of course not as fine as Link. But either way. So don't sue, my money is like gone, the only thing I see in my wallet is probably (opens wallet and little moth flies out.) Well nothing… So don't sue, because I don't own this song and is only using it for entertainment purposes. And Steven Tyler when you get the chance. CALL ME BABY! ;)
Chapter 4- Linky's Got A Gun, AHHHH!
Original Song Title: Janey's Got A gun. (But since there's no Janey in Zelda, Linky will just have to do.)
Artist- The quite good looking but is like 60-year-old band: AEROSMITH!
Rewritten By: Me and Shiek. (Yes I hired him too.)
Special Appearance By: THE ALMIGHTY LOOKING EXTREMELY FINE THING THAT HAS EVER BEEN ABLE TO WALK ON THIS GOOD-FOR-NOTHING PLANET, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I'VE WOULD'VE DONE WITHOUT HIM, BUT IT'S THE ONE AND ONLY… LINK. (Author bows down, and so does everyone who is reading this.) "OH LINK WE'RE NOT WORTHY, WE'RE NOT WORTHY!"
Location: Hyrule Bank. Inside ground and me and Sheik are doing a concert to benefit the 'make a wish' program, but since we've been tricked just to do a concert for free, we really had no other choice.
(The bank's light turns off, and smog goes out everywhere as author is dressing up like Link, and Sheik plays the guitar next to her. Of course Sheik plays his oh so sexy guitar, you know with that guitar he reminds me of Prince with that yellow guitar of his, but anyways… The speedy beat beings and author starts shaking her ass and singing.)
Dum, dum, dum, Linky what have you done
Dum, dum, dum, it's the sound of his gun
Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done
Dum, dum, dum, it's the sound, it's the sound... Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah....
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Linky's Got A Gun Linky's Got A Gun Look at him with a gun is a whole lotta fun (It is. I mean it!)
Better than lookin' straight at the sun (DON'T EVER DO THAT, YOU MIGHT GO BLIND AND END UP LOOKING AT BLACK STUFF FOREVA.)
What did Zelda do What did she put you through (A/N: Cause I swear if she even tried to touch you, just say the word and I'll F&(ing kill her to pieces.)
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They say when Linky was arrested
They found him, and went insane But man, he had it comin'
Now that Linky's Got A Gun He ain't never gonna be the same
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Linky's Got A Gun Linky's Got A Gun
His dog day's just begun
Now everybody is on the run
Tell me now it's untrue
That Linky ain't dating me, but he's dating you! (Very unlikely.)
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He jacked the little bitty baby
The man has got to be insane
They say the spell that he was under
The lightnin' and the thunder
Knew that someone had to stop the rain Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
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Run away, run away from the pain Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run you'll have nothing to gain
Linky's Got A Gun Linky's Got A Gun
His dog day's just begun Now everybody is on the run
What did Zelda do Hey Link, remember last night, well I.O.U.
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I had to take him down easy
And put a bullet in his brain He said 'cause nobody believes me The man was such a sleeze
Go ahead Link STRIP TEASE!!!
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Run away, run away from the pain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Run away, run away, run, run away Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away
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Linky's Got A Gun Linky's Got A Gun
Linky's Got A Gun Everybody is on the run Linky's Got A Gun
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His dog day's just begun
Now everybody's on the run (Honey, honey what's your problem)
'Cause Linky's Got A Gun (Tell me it ain't right)
Linky's Got A Gun (Zelda's now in fright)
His dog day's just begun (That made you scream at night)
Linky's Got A Gun His dog day's just begun
Now everybody's on the run
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Linky's Got A Gun
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The author finishes singing her song, when she notices a man dressed in a black cloak enter the bank.
Bank Lady: Yes sir how may I help you?
Cloaked Guy: Withdraw from my account please.
Bank Lady: Okay I need your name.
Cloaked Guy: I don't think I can tell you that here.
Bank Lady: Alrighty then how about you show your face?
Cloaked Guy: I can't do that either.
Me getting angry of the man totally screwing up my performance I ripped apart his black cloak.
Dark Shedevil: OH MY FU&&&%&ING GOSH!
Random Fangirl: Hey look everyone it's LINK!
(Everyone either there or reading this constantly panics. Even me.)
Random Fangirl: Come on girls let's get him!
Dark Shedevil: Hey you guys came here for MY concert. Not to be chasing Linky… OHHHH! LINKY…
Random Fanboy: I don't remember you.
Dark Shedevil: (Slaps herself silly) I'm the girl who sang 'Linky's got a gun' remember?
Police Man: (Points at Link)Hey everyone Link has a gun!
Farm Guy: (Takes out pitchfork) Yeah let's get him!
C.I.A Agent: (Takes out club) Come on!
Sheik: (Sarcastically)Yes, let's go get him!
Link: No! I don't have a gun. I have a sword!
Random Fangirl: Pfff! Right… We heard THAT before. Come on Link impersonator, we know the real Link is a good guy and ain't a pervert like you.
The Deranged People In The Bank: Let's get him! (Start chasing Link)
Link: Ahh! Dark Shedevil, Sheik HELP ME!
Dark Shedevil: (Walks away whistling the other way.)
Sheik: (Smoking a cigarette)
Link: AHHHHHH! SOMEONE HELP ME!
And so the day ended with me and Sheik taking a dinner date to Denny's, Sheik going to the hospital for steak overdose and me realizing that the guy in the bank, really was Link. So here I am visiting Link right next to Sheik's hospital room, begging for forgiveness. The day ended well.
Aerosmith's Bitch, er…. Composer's Note: Okay yes I know, not funny. But next time I'll try better. So stop whatever the hell you're doing and review my story. Or else.