AUTHOR'S NOTE: I recently realized that when I put a characters thought in italics, it doesn't show up in my story. So from now on, thoughts will be in single quotations, like these: ' '.
Ashley couldn't stand seeing Craig happy. And Manny couldn't stand seeing him with someone else. So being the vicious girl she is, she came up with a way to make him pay. She put a note in Ashley's locker telling her to go to the Zen garden at lunch one day, but didn't sign her name. So when Ashley arrived at the Zen garden, Manny was already there.
"You have got to be kidding me. Please tell me you didn't write the note."
"I did."
"I'm so out of here."
"It makes you angry, doesn't it?"
Ashley stopped in her tracks.
"What makes me angry?"
"Seeing Craig happy, after what he did to you."
Ash turned on her heels.
"How can you even say that when you had a huge part in hurting me, too?"
"I got hurt too, Ashley. I know what I did was wrong, I paid for it, or do you not remember?"
"What do you want, Manny? To reminisce about the pain some jerk brought us?"
"No. I want him to hurt, too. Don't you think that's fair?"
"Manny, who are we to judge what people deserve?"
"He hurt us, Ashley! Intentionally! HE knew what would happen!"
Ashley sighed.
"What do you have in mind?"
"You know Craig has a gentle, soft core. Say the wrong things to him, and he'll break. Shatter. I promise."
Ashley and Manny stayed in the Zen Garden for about ten more minutes going over what would be said and who would be saying what. The plan was to go through the next morning.
Like usual, Craig and Michelle were sitting in front of their lockers, fingers laced together, talking. It amazed them both how they always had something to talk about, since all they ever did was talk to each other. For the brief moment that Craig took his eyes off of Michelle's face, he saw something he thought he would never see. Ashley and Manny walking side by side. 'Oh no,' Craig thought. 'This is definitely not good. Nope very bad. Must leave.' Craig stood up quickly, jerking Michelle up with him.
"Uh, Craig?"
"C'mon, let's go."
"Stop! What's going on" Michelle said half laughing, half in confusion.
"Too late," Craig muttered as Ashley and Manny reached them. 'Just keep it cool, Craig, and everything will be fine.'
"Ladies?"
"Cut the crap, Craig." Manny said.
"What do you guys want?" Michelle said.
"To deliver a message." Manny said.
"From who?" Craig inquired.
"Practically everyone you two ever met." Ashley said.
"Craig, you suck."
"Hey!" Michelle said in his defense, but Manny glared at her, which told Michelle she probably shouldn't talk. So Ashley continued.
"Craig, everyone you meet, you ruin their life. And you chase them away. Hell, you couldn't even keep your dad around! He was so desperate to get away from you he died!"
Craig looked at his feet. Ashley and Manny smiled, knowing that struck a nerve.
"I'm right, aren't I? C'mon Craig, what was the last thing he said to you."
As Craig thought of that night, it upset him. A single tear fell from his eye to the floor. Michelle saw and wanted it to stop.
"Ashley, cut the shit!"
"Shut up, blondie! You're up next!" Manny said.
"He said…" Craig began, quietly, "He said that I always screw up."
"That's right, Craig. You always screw up. And you always will. You chased me away. You ruined me. I cared about you. I helped you deal with your dad. But you just couldn't settle for one, no, you had to have two. Then came Manny. And look what you did to her! Got her pregnant, almost ruining her life forever. Don't you feel bad? Don't you ever think about the life that was aborted because you screwed up, again?"
"That's enough, Ashley!" Michelle yelled.
Craig slid to the ground and Manny shoved Michelle.
"And you!" Manny said. "You come here and think you can take what ever you want. You push everyone out of the way and act like you own the place. But you aren't even good enough for yourself! We all watched as you got smaller and smaller. Took you long enough to realize you had a problem. You make me sick. We would all be better off if you had never moved here."
"No, Manny." Ashley said as she looked down at Craig.
"We would all be better off if HE had never moved here."
And with that, they walked away. For the rest of the Michelle and Craig didn't speak. Not even to each other. When Michelle would look at him, he looked empty. There was something missing in his eyes. Something had faded. He had faded. She feared she was going to lose him. They walked home together, but didn't talk until they got to Michelle's house.
"I…uh…I'll see you tomorrow Craig."
"I love you." He whispered.
"I love you, too. Call me tonight."
"Yeah…" He said as he walked away.
The walk home for Craig seemed longer than usual. But his mind was plagued with thoughts. 'They were right. I have ruined everything. And I'm going to ruin Michelle, too. And then chase her away. But why?? Why do I always do that? I can't. I have to make it stop. I can't hurt her anymore.'
When Craig got home, he said hi to Joey, Angie, and Caitlin. Caitlin had moved in with them two weeks ago, but Craig hadn't really noticed. He didn't really notice anything except Michelle. He walked up to his room, still with the lost look in his eyes. He shut his door, and sat at his desk. He took out a notebook and pen, and an envelope.
After dinner, Michelle went up to her room and waited for Craig to call. She had been waiting all day after school, too, but he didn't call. 'I guess he won't. That's okay. A lot of stuff happened today. We can talk tomorrow.' At 11:30, she was still awake, on her computer, doing some homework and talking to friends through MSN Messenger. Then, at 11:34, her phone rang. She picked it up and looked at the caller ID. It said Jeremiah, Joey. 'Yes!' She thought. 'He finally called. I'm so glad, I have a lot to say.' She answered it quickly.
"Craig?"
"Michelle?" It wasn't Craig's voice. It wasn't even a man's voice.
"Who is this?"
"It's Caitlin." The woman said. She sounded weird. Winded.
"Oh. Uh, what's up?"
"There was an accident…Craig…he…his room…"She heard crying.
"Caitlin? what's wrong with Craig?" Michelle was scared.
"he's being rushed to the hospital, Michelle we can come get you, Joey is in the ambulance with him and me and Angie are on our way…"
Michelle had dropped the phone when she heard the word hospital. She raced down the stairs almost slipping, put on her sneakers, and flew through the door. She was wearing pajama pants and a sweatshirt. The hospital was six blocks away. She ran. And ran. And ran until she couldn't feel her legs. She fell three times on the way, but didn't notice. She was too focused on getting to the hospital. When it came into sight, she picked up speed, sprinting faster than she ever had before. 'Got to get to Craig. Got to get to Craig.' That was the only thought in her head. Getting to Craig. She shoved the emergency room entrance doors open, whipping her head left to right, trying to figure out which way to go. The woman at the desk saw the frantic blonde girl.
"Miss, can I help you? Miss? Miss?" The woman stood up and began to come around from behind the desk. Michelle looked to down the hall to her left for the twelfth time and saw Craig. On a stretcher. Being pushed into a room quickly. She took off.
"Miss!!! You can't go down there!" The desk woman yelled.
Michelle didn't hear her. Michelle didn't even notice the cart of supplies she ran into, knocking it over and spilling bandages, q-tips, bottles of peroxide, and throat sap everywhere. She was running so fast that she ran past the room Craig had gone into. She cam to a screeching halt and turned around, stumbling a bit. She caught herself before she fell, running to the double doors that lead to the room Craig was in. She tried to push them open, but someone grabbed her from behind.
"NOO!" She shrieked.
"LET GO OF ME!! CRAIG!!!"
"Miss, calm down." A large man was holding her arms, and she was wriggling. She stopped. She knew it wouldn't help.
"Please, go sit in the waiting room."
She did as she was told. She had faith. She knew Craig would be okay.
"I'll come back when the doctors are finished." The man said. Michelle shook her head rapidly up and down. She went and sat down next to Joey. They didn't speak. Her hands were shaking. Tears were pouring from her eyes from the thought that Craig was hurt. But she knew he would be okay. She just knew. She sat for ten minutes until the large man came back. She jumped out of her seat and ran to him.
"What is it, what is it? Can I go see him? Where's Craig I have to see him!"
"I'm sorry. He didn't make it."
Michelle stopped jumping up and down.
"What? What does that mean?"
"He's dead, miss."
Michelle shook her head.
"No…no…no, no he isn't! You're wrong! Let me see him!!"
"Only if you calm down, miss."
She did her best.
The man lead her and Joey to the room, where doctors were filing out of. The doctors had long, sorrowful looks on their faces. The man stopped in front of the doors, and Michelle looked up at him.
"You can go in."
She looked at Joey. He shook his head yes, telling her to go without him.
Michelle, hands still shaking, pushed the doors open. It was like a nightmare. But worse. It was reality. Craig was laying on an operating table. Michelle slowly walked to his side. She tilted her head to the left as she looked down at him. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. She didn't believe what she was seeing. She went over every inch of his body. His hair was ruffled, like it always was. She ran her hand through it. 'Still soft.' His eyes we closed, lids tinted purple. His face was pale. She put her hand to his cheek. 'So cold.' His lips were dry, slightly apart. She ran her finger along them. He was wearing the clothes he had worn that day, only they were covered in blood. She tried to trace where the blood had came from. There were no marks on his torso, but then she saw his arms were covered in blood, too. She rolled up is plaid, green, long sleeved shirt on both sides. There were piles of gauzes on both wrists, blood seeping through. Michelle didn't understand. She couldn't comprehend. And then it hit her like a freight train. It knocked the wind out of her and she stumbled backwards as she covered her mouth.
"No…"she whispered, "Craig…no…" she went back to his side. She shook his shoulders.
"Craig. Craig, wake up. I get it, I get. I love you, you don't need to pretend anymore. Please Craig, wake up. Wake up, Craig. Craig…" She fell to her knees and cried. She cried harder than humanly possible.
"Craig…" She whispered, "Please, don't leave me. Craig…why…Craig…I'm sorry…."
It took her all the strength she had to stand up. She looked down at him again. She kissed him. And she left him. She walked past Joey without looking up. By the time she left, Caitlin and Angie had just gotten there. She barely noticed them as she walked out the hospital and out into the cold night. When she got home, her mother was awake. Apparently Caitlin had stopped there to get Michelle, but she was already long gone. Caitlin told Michelle's mother. But when her mom tried to talk to her when she got home, Michelle wasn't having any of it. She went straight into her room. And knelt beside her bed.
'Dear god', she thought as she started her prayer. 'it's been a long time. Is that why? Is that why Craig was taken from me? Because I shut you out of my life? Because I turned my back on you? If not, then why? Why would you do this to me? I was happy. It was the one time in my life I found happiness, and you robbed me. You took him from me. How could you let this happen? I hate you. I hate you. I HATE YOU!!'
"DO YOU HEAR ME?!" She screamed as looked up.
"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I hate! You! I hate you! I hate you…I hate you…."
She cried herself to sleep that night. Dreaming of Craig. Dreaming that she saved him. Bt knowing she couldn't. Knowing she hadn't been there for him. And she blamed herself.
Ashley couldn't stand seeing Craig happy. And Manny couldn't stand seeing him with someone else. So being the vicious girl she is, she came up with a way to make him pay. She put a note in Ashley's locker telling her to go to the Zen garden at lunch one day, but didn't sign her name. So when Ashley arrived at the Zen garden, Manny was already there.
"You have got to be kidding me. Please tell me you didn't write the note."
"I did."
"I'm so out of here."
"It makes you angry, doesn't it?"
Ashley stopped in her tracks.
"What makes me angry?"
"Seeing Craig happy, after what he did to you."
Ash turned on her heels.
"How can you even say that when you had a huge part in hurting me, too?"
"I got hurt too, Ashley. I know what I did was wrong, I paid for it, or do you not remember?"
"What do you want, Manny? To reminisce about the pain some jerk brought us?"
"No. I want him to hurt, too. Don't you think that's fair?"
"Manny, who are we to judge what people deserve?"
"He hurt us, Ashley! Intentionally! HE knew what would happen!"
Ashley sighed.
"What do you have in mind?"
"You know Craig has a gentle, soft core. Say the wrong things to him, and he'll break. Shatter. I promise."
Ashley and Manny stayed in the Zen Garden for about ten more minutes going over what would be said and who would be saying what. The plan was to go through the next morning.
Like usual, Craig and Michelle were sitting in front of their lockers, fingers laced together, talking. It amazed them both how they always had something to talk about, since all they ever did was talk to each other. For the brief moment that Craig took his eyes off of Michelle's face, he saw something he thought he would never see. Ashley and Manny walking side by side. 'Oh no,' Craig thought. 'This is definitely not good. Nope very bad. Must leave.' Craig stood up quickly, jerking Michelle up with him.
"Uh, Craig?"
"C'mon, let's go."
"Stop! What's going on" Michelle said half laughing, half in confusion.
"Too late," Craig muttered as Ashley and Manny reached them. 'Just keep it cool, Craig, and everything will be fine.'
"Ladies?"
"Cut the crap, Craig." Manny said.
"What do you guys want?" Michelle said.
"To deliver a message." Manny said.
"From who?" Craig inquired.
"Practically everyone you two ever met." Ashley said.
"Craig, you suck."
"Hey!" Michelle said in his defense, but Manny glared at her, which told Michelle she probably shouldn't talk. So Ashley continued.
"Craig, everyone you meet, you ruin their life. And you chase them away. Hell, you couldn't even keep your dad around! He was so desperate to get away from you he died!"
Craig looked at his feet. Ashley and Manny smiled, knowing that struck a nerve.
"I'm right, aren't I? C'mon Craig, what was the last thing he said to you."
As Craig thought of that night, it upset him. A single tear fell from his eye to the floor. Michelle saw and wanted it to stop.
"Ashley, cut the shit!"
"Shut up, blondie! You're up next!" Manny said.
"He said…" Craig began, quietly, "He said that I always screw up."
"That's right, Craig. You always screw up. And you always will. You chased me away. You ruined me. I cared about you. I helped you deal with your dad. But you just couldn't settle for one, no, you had to have two. Then came Manny. And look what you did to her! Got her pregnant, almost ruining her life forever. Don't you feel bad? Don't you ever think about the life that was aborted because you screwed up, again?"
"That's enough, Ashley!" Michelle yelled.
Craig slid to the ground and Manny shoved Michelle.
"And you!" Manny said. "You come here and think you can take what ever you want. You push everyone out of the way and act like you own the place. But you aren't even good enough for yourself! We all watched as you got smaller and smaller. Took you long enough to realize you had a problem. You make me sick. We would all be better off if you had never moved here."
"No, Manny." Ashley said as she looked down at Craig.
"We would all be better off if HE had never moved here."
And with that, they walked away. For the rest of the Michelle and Craig didn't speak. Not even to each other. When Michelle would look at him, he looked empty. There was something missing in his eyes. Something had faded. He had faded. She feared she was going to lose him. They walked home together, but didn't talk until they got to Michelle's house.
"I…uh…I'll see you tomorrow Craig."
"I love you." He whispered.
"I love you, too. Call me tonight."
"Yeah…" He said as he walked away.
The walk home for Craig seemed longer than usual. But his mind was plagued with thoughts. 'They were right. I have ruined everything. And I'm going to ruin Michelle, too. And then chase her away. But why?? Why do I always do that? I can't. I have to make it stop. I can't hurt her anymore.'
When Craig got home, he said hi to Joey, Angie, and Caitlin. Caitlin had moved in with them two weeks ago, but Craig hadn't really noticed. He didn't really notice anything except Michelle. He walked up to his room, still with the lost look in his eyes. He shut his door, and sat at his desk. He took out a notebook and pen, and an envelope.
After dinner, Michelle went up to her room and waited for Craig to call. She had been waiting all day after school, too, but he didn't call. 'I guess he won't. That's okay. A lot of stuff happened today. We can talk tomorrow.' At 11:30, she was still awake, on her computer, doing some homework and talking to friends through MSN Messenger. Then, at 11:34, her phone rang. She picked it up and looked at the caller ID. It said Jeremiah, Joey. 'Yes!' She thought. 'He finally called. I'm so glad, I have a lot to say.' She answered it quickly.
"Craig?"
"Michelle?" It wasn't Craig's voice. It wasn't even a man's voice.
"Who is this?"
"It's Caitlin." The woman said. She sounded weird. Winded.
"Oh. Uh, what's up?"
"There was an accident…Craig…he…his room…"She heard crying.
"Caitlin? what's wrong with Craig?" Michelle was scared.
"he's being rushed to the hospital, Michelle we can come get you, Joey is in the ambulance with him and me and Angie are on our way…"
Michelle had dropped the phone when she heard the word hospital. She raced down the stairs almost slipping, put on her sneakers, and flew through the door. She was wearing pajama pants and a sweatshirt. The hospital was six blocks away. She ran. And ran. And ran until she couldn't feel her legs. She fell three times on the way, but didn't notice. She was too focused on getting to the hospital. When it came into sight, she picked up speed, sprinting faster than she ever had before. 'Got to get to Craig. Got to get to Craig.' That was the only thought in her head. Getting to Craig. She shoved the emergency room entrance doors open, whipping her head left to right, trying to figure out which way to go. The woman at the desk saw the frantic blonde girl.
"Miss, can I help you? Miss? Miss?" The woman stood up and began to come around from behind the desk. Michelle looked to down the hall to her left for the twelfth time and saw Craig. On a stretcher. Being pushed into a room quickly. She took off.
"Miss!!! You can't go down there!" The desk woman yelled.
Michelle didn't hear her. Michelle didn't even notice the cart of supplies she ran into, knocking it over and spilling bandages, q-tips, bottles of peroxide, and throat sap everywhere. She was running so fast that she ran past the room Craig had gone into. She cam to a screeching halt and turned around, stumbling a bit. She caught herself before she fell, running to the double doors that lead to the room Craig was in. She tried to push them open, but someone grabbed her from behind.
"NOO!" She shrieked.
"LET GO OF ME!! CRAIG!!!"
"Miss, calm down." A large man was holding her arms, and she was wriggling. She stopped. She knew it wouldn't help.
"Please, go sit in the waiting room."
She did as she was told. She had faith. She knew Craig would be okay.
"I'll come back when the doctors are finished." The man said. Michelle shook her head rapidly up and down. She went and sat down next to Joey. They didn't speak. Her hands were shaking. Tears were pouring from her eyes from the thought that Craig was hurt. But she knew he would be okay. She just knew. She sat for ten minutes until the large man came back. She jumped out of her seat and ran to him.
"What is it, what is it? Can I go see him? Where's Craig I have to see him!"
"I'm sorry. He didn't make it."
Michelle stopped jumping up and down.
"What? What does that mean?"
"He's dead, miss."
Michelle shook her head.
"No…no…no, no he isn't! You're wrong! Let me see him!!"
"Only if you calm down, miss."
She did her best.
The man lead her and Joey to the room, where doctors were filing out of. The doctors had long, sorrowful looks on their faces. The man stopped in front of the doors, and Michelle looked up at him.
"You can go in."
She looked at Joey. He shook his head yes, telling her to go without him.
Michelle, hands still shaking, pushed the doors open. It was like a nightmare. But worse. It was reality. Craig was laying on an operating table. Michelle slowly walked to his side. She tilted her head to the left as she looked down at him. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. She didn't believe what she was seeing. She went over every inch of his body. His hair was ruffled, like it always was. She ran her hand through it. 'Still soft.' His eyes we closed, lids tinted purple. His face was pale. She put her hand to his cheek. 'So cold.' His lips were dry, slightly apart. She ran her finger along them. He was wearing the clothes he had worn that day, only they were covered in blood. She tried to trace where the blood had came from. There were no marks on his torso, but then she saw his arms were covered in blood, too. She rolled up is plaid, green, long sleeved shirt on both sides. There were piles of gauzes on both wrists, blood seeping through. Michelle didn't understand. She couldn't comprehend. And then it hit her like a freight train. It knocked the wind out of her and she stumbled backwards as she covered her mouth.
"No…"she whispered, "Craig…no…" she went back to his side. She shook his shoulders.
"Craig. Craig, wake up. I get it, I get. I love you, you don't need to pretend anymore. Please Craig, wake up. Wake up, Craig. Craig…" She fell to her knees and cried. She cried harder than humanly possible.
"Craig…" She whispered, "Please, don't leave me. Craig…why…Craig…I'm sorry…."
It took her all the strength she had to stand up. She looked down at him again. She kissed him. And she left him. She walked past Joey without looking up. By the time she left, Caitlin and Angie had just gotten there. She barely noticed them as she walked out the hospital and out into the cold night. When she got home, her mother was awake. Apparently Caitlin had stopped there to get Michelle, but she was already long gone. Caitlin told Michelle's mother. But when her mom tried to talk to her when she got home, Michelle wasn't having any of it. She went straight into her room. And knelt beside her bed.
'Dear god', she thought as she started her prayer. 'it's been a long time. Is that why? Is that why Craig was taken from me? Because I shut you out of my life? Because I turned my back on you? If not, then why? Why would you do this to me? I was happy. It was the one time in my life I found happiness, and you robbed me. You took him from me. How could you let this happen? I hate you. I hate you. I HATE YOU!!'
"DO YOU HEAR ME?!" She screamed as looked up.
"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I hate! You! I hate you! I hate you…I hate you…."
She cried herself to sleep that night. Dreaming of Craig. Dreaming that she saved him. Bt knowing she couldn't. Knowing she hadn't been there for him. And she blamed herself.