Chapter 18 - Recovery
Buffy woke up the next morning in an unfamiliar room and a strange bed. At first she couldn't remember where she was, but as she moved to get up pain shot through her backside, she remembered everything and started crying again. Just then, Lady Lilah entered the room.
"Oh Buffy, don't cry dear. Everything's okay now and taken care of." She stroked Buffy's hair.
"It hurts so bad!" Buffy sobbed. "Why did he do this to me?"
"Oh Buffy, Angel was very drunk and didn't know what he was doing. He's very sorry." Lilah assured Buffy.
"He wasn't so drunk that he didn't know he was raping me! Grandmother, he raped me in my ass!" Buffy shrieked. "Why would he do that? We were going to make love, but then he turned me over and…." Buffy broke down again. Lilah held her.
"Buffy darling, I know you're in pain and I know it's hard to understand, but this was all a misunderstanding. I spoke with Angel myself last night. I wanted an explanation for why he hurt my baby. He explained to me that he didn't want to take your virginity, so that's why he thought anal sex would be best. He didn't realize you'd never had anal sex before. He is very sorry Buffy, but really he was just protecting your virtue."
"You're siding with him?" Buffy asked incredulously. "He raped me and your siding with him?" Her voice steadily rose.
"Now Buffy, you just told me you were going to sleep with him. So it was not rape. I will not have you ruining his family name with that rape talk. Ethan told me about the incident in the game room and I have a good idea what you were up to in Sunnydale. I'm amazed that you've managed to keep your virginity this long, but you don't have to have sex to be a loose girl. Now Buffy, I expect you to act like a proper young lady and not some floozy." Lilah stood up and smoothed her skirt. "Now I understand if you no longer wish to date Angel. There's several other eligible young gentleman I can introduce you to. You will just be more careful from now on." Lilah went toward the door. "I've brought you some clothes to change into. We'll go back to Pembrook today, and I'll have the car take you to school tomorrow morning in time for class. Don't worry Buffy, everything will work out for the best."
During the ride back to Pembrook Buffy was very silent and looked at the window the entire time. She was furious with Lady Lilah and was not going have any further interaction with her. Buffy couldn't stop thinking about how Lilah accused her of being loose. In her mind she was calculating how fast she could get out of this crazy country.
As soon as the car pulled up to the entrance of Pembrook, Buffy went straight to her room and locked the door. She immediately went to the phone and dialed her mother. All she got was her voicemail. Buffy then dialed her mothers cell phone, but again, got voicemail. She called back the home number. "Mom, it's me. Call me as soon as you get in – it's an emergency." Buffy then laid down on her bed and thought back to last night. She started to cry again, trying to figure out how it all happened. Everything seemed to be going well with Angel, and she was willingly going to make love to him. Why would he rape her? She picked up the phone again and dialed her mother, this time leaving a barely coherent message. She needed to talk to someone so bad. There was only one person who seemed to understand, to actually know the truth, and that was Spike. A few days ago the thought of him being her only confident, him being the only person she could trust to know what had truly happened to her would have mortified her. But now she thought back to his reaction to her in the hallway – he knew exactly what had happened to her and had tried to help her. More than she could say about her grandmother.
Buffy grabbed the phone again and dialed her mother. Voicemail again. She thought about calling Spike, but she didn't know his number. And she didn't know the number for directory assistance. She tried dialing 411, but the phone only beeped at her. She got up off the bed and drug out a suitcase from underneath. She started packing all the 'extra' things she had left here for the weekends. She certainly wasn't coming back here to visit crazy ass Lilah. There were too many clothes and they all wouldn't fit in the bag, and she didn't know where Amy had put her other suitcases. 'Oh well,' Buffy thought, 'I'm rich now, and I can by new things once I get back to the states.' Just then there was a knock at the door.
"Go away!" Buffy shouted angrily. She was not in the mood to see anybody.
"It's Dawn," a small voice said on the other side.
Buffy sighed. She didn't feel like company, but she couldn't ignore Dawn, it wasn't fair to the girl. Buffy opened the door. "Hey Dawn."
Dawn smiled at her and walked in, closing the door behind her. Then she turned to Buffy and gave her a fierce hug and whispered, "Are you okay?"
Buffy drew back and looked at Dawn's face. She could tell the girl knew everything. Buffy burst into tears.
Dawn drew Buffy back into her arms and stroked her back. "It's going to be okay Buffy, Angel's a bloody ass. But you'll survive, the women in are family are as strong as they come." Dawn assured her.
Buffy's sobs dies down. "Oh Dawn, I can't believe I trusted him."
"You didn't know."
"Did you?" Buffy asked.
"No, I would have warned you. But a lot of these upper-class men think they can take what they want and there will be no consequences." Dawn said bitterly. "Especially the Angelus'."
"But why would grandmother let this happen to me?"
"Buffy, Lilah had no choice. She's dating Angel's father, and if she were to let you press charges, the Angelus family would see to it that our family was ruined. We have too many weak spots and the have more connections," Dawn explained. "I'm sure all you can think now is that Lilah is a bitch, but there is a reason she's that way."
"I'm sorry Dawn, but I can't believe that there is nothing that can be done. You just can't go around raping people and get away with it. He should pay, and Lilah should have supported me through this. I can't come back here. I'm going to go back to America."
"Oh Buffy, I'm going to miss you, but I understand. Hopefully I can come visit you?" Dawn smiled.
"Of course silly! Right now you're the only family I have here." Buffy hugged Dawn again. "Why don't we sneak down to the kitchen and get some food so we don't have to dine with Lilah tonight?"
"Sounds great. I'll set up some movies in the game room, you hit the kitchen."
"Okay." Buffy and Dawn exited the room, Dawn going toward the game room, and Buffy down the stairs toward the kitchen. When she reached the bottom, Buffy heard voices in the study. Whoever was in there appeared to be arguing, so Buffy went closer to see what was going on. The door was slightly open and she saw Lady Lilah, Ethan and Holland Angelus inside, all looking very tense.
"Holland, I'm sorry, but something has to be done regarding Angel. Buffy is in a very fragile state, and I don't think she can handle him getting away scot-free. Especially seeing him around campus." Lady Lilah said, ring her hands.
"Lady Lilah, this is Buffy's fault. Those American girls are known to be loose, and I've heard rumors about Joyce raising her in a hippy community." Holland smirked.
"Holland that is not true and that does not change the fact that Angel raped Buffy. There has to be consequences to his actions, and I know for a fact that this is not the first time this has happened. There have been rumors Holland. And let's not forget what happened with Drusilla." By this point Lilah was shaking with anger. Buffy could see it from where she stood. She couldn't believe that Lilah was trying to help. After this morning, Buffy had felt that Lilah didn't really care what had happened to her. And what was this about Drusilla? Angel did something to her?
While Buffy was musing over what was being said, she realized Ethan was talking.
"…was unforgivable, but we swept it under the carpet for the sake of the families. Well Holland, we can't keep doing this. We will give you a choice. You either transfer you son from Oxford or we will press charges."
Lilah nodded in agreement, but Holland laughed.
"Now really Ethan, who do you think your talking to? Nothing of the sort will happen. You can't touch me. You can't touch my son. I will bury your family. There won't be a Buffy left for Lilah to fawn over if I bring down my wrath. Do I make myself clear?" Holland raised his eyebrows to them.
Ethan and Lilah were silent.
"I'll take that as a yes." Holland straightened his jacket and headed toward the door. Buffy scurried behind the stairs when she saw him coming.
"Lilah, I'll see you at dinner tomorrow." Holland smiled at her. Lilah nodded, tears in her eyes. Holland left the room. He paused to looked toward the staircase, but then kept walking.
Lilah started crying softly. Ethan rushed over to comfort her. "Lady Lilah, we tried everything we could, there was nothing else we could have done."
"God damn him!" Lilah wailed.
"Lilah, you know how much of a hold he has over our family, we are powerless. We should have never pushed Buffy toward Liam, it only backfired in our faces."
"Ethan, you're right, I never should have tried to fix them up. Then this would never have happened. I can't believe he is getting away with this! I had to try to do something; you should have seen Buffy this morning. She hates me now." Lilah sobbed.
"Lilah you did what you had to do to protect her. Trust me, one day she'll understand and be grateful."
Buffy had heard enough. She had to find out what was going on between the Angelus and Giles family and Dawn was the only person she could ask. She sneaked back up the steps to the game room.
Dawn was standing in front of the stereo, sorting through some cd's. She looked up when Buffy entered. "Where's the snacks?" she asked.
"I got distracted," Buffy explained. "I went down the stairs and Holland Angelus was in the study with Lady Lilah and your dad."
"Get out!"
"Yep, and Lady Lilah and Ethan were trying to get him to take action against Angel."
"You're kidding. So they finally developed some balls." Dawn was amazed. She knew that nobody spoke out against Holland Angelus. He was too powerful to mess with.
"Well, they tried, but it ended up with Holland threatening them and me."
"Figures. There's been rumors that he takes care of his problems by eliminating them."
"You have got to be kidding – what is this, the English mob?" Buffy asked in disbelief.
"No, its just people with money can do whatever they want and Lord Angelus has plenty."
"Well, so do we."
"You and me yes. Lilah and Ethan, not so much. Our money was put into trust a long time ago and it is protected. But the rest of the family money was almost totally squandered by your dad. Lilah has just been able to build the fortune back up recently with the help of Lord Angelus. He helped her from loosing the estate a couple years ago." Dawn explained. Lilah didn't know she was aware of these things. But Dawn kept tabs on everything that went down in this house.
"So is that why she dates Lord Angelus?" Buffy asked.
"I think so. I couldn't figure any other reason she would other than showing her gratitude." Dawn smirked. "It makes sense why they didn't get the police involved. Are you doing okay Buffy? Is all of this putting to much stress on you?" Dawn asked worriedly.
"Thanks Dawn, but I'd rather know the truth. I'm upset that Lilah's in this position, but I can't hate and blame her for what's happened anymore. She didn't have much of a choice.
"Well, when you get back to school, stay away from Angel."
"Oh, don't worry about that. I couldn't stand the site of him." Buffy shuddered.
The girls sat back and watched a movie. Afterwards, they went down and sat at the dinner table with Ethan and Lady Lilah. Buffy could see Lilah's surprise that she showed. No mention was made of Angel or Holland. Everybody kept the conversation light.
After dinner Buffy went up to her room. As she entered, her phone was ringing.
"Hello?"
"Buffy dear, what's wrong!" An anxious Joyce was on the line.
"Oh, mom, it's nothing" Buffy no longer wanted to leave, and definitely didn't want to tell her mom what had happened. Joyce would just go insane with worry.
"But sweetie, you left all those messages and sounded so anxious!"
"Uh, nothing mom, I was just feeling homesick and really needed to hear your voice." That wasn't a lie.
"Oh sweetie, well I miss you too!"
Buffy talked to her mom for about a half hour before hanging up the line. Buffy felt much better after talking to her. She unpacked her suitcase and went to bed early since she'd have to get up early to get back to school in time for her first class.