Away from the sun
"Hi. What's all this?" Sam asked when she entered the apartment. She hung her coat and keys and stood before the table.
"Dinner, movies and us alone on a Friday night," He stepped up and kissed her.
"Ummm, and what was that?"
"A welcome home," he whispered. "Here, let's eat and have some wine, talk about your day,"
"You know what, I had a pretty ordinary day and I'd rather not talk too much tonight, if you know what I mean," She rose off her chair and kissed him on the neck and nibbled his ear.
He liked it but he was also uncomfortable. Sex had not been easy since the accident and though they managed to be intimate a few times since he'd been home, he just wasn't physically able to make love to her the way he wanted to. It was awkward and though she did not mind, it bothered him. He was glad when she returned to her seat and finished the meal. There was some light chat and he rose to clear the table. Sam tried to help.
"No, you sit, you've been on your feet all day and I need the practice,"
"Okay. Great dinner by the way," she said, as she watched him walk to the kitchen sink. Watching him was one of her favorite things to do. He was so tall and moved so smoothly that even the limp didn't take that away. He looked great tonight. She could see his broad back through the shirt and from all the physical therapy and working out, his butt looked even better. He was getting stronger too. Luka gave 120% at therapy and worked out an extra 3 hours a week. He was determined to get his life back and she knew he wanted to go back to work as soon as possible.
"What?" he asked. Suddenly her concentration was broken. He caught her checking him out.
"You know what," she grinned. "Don't pretend you didn't know I was checking you out!"
"I don't know why," he replied quietly, bowing his head and busying himself with the dishes.
"What? You know I like looking at you. Are you thinking all that's changed since the accident?" Luka did not look at her nor did he reply.
Sam moved over to him and led him out of the kitchen. She eased him onto the sofa and took her hand and lifted his chin so that his eyes would meet hers. She moved the hair away from his forehead and ran her finger along the scar there. Luka closed his eyes and tried to turn away.
"Look at me Luka. Look at me," she said and he obliged her. "It doesn't bother me. I actually like this one."
"I know," he replied, shyly.
"Makes you look like a bad ass!" She teased and was glad when he managed to smiled.
Then she traced his jaw line with her finger; traced down his neck and touched the little bump on his collarbone that was the only indication there had been an injury there. She kissed his collarbone and began unbuttoning his shirt. Running her fingers along his chest she eventually reached the long and now much narrower scar on his abdomen.
"This one is healing nicely," she said and she gently kissed him there.
"Doesn't turn you off?"
"No. It reminds me of how thankful I am. This scar saved your life and every time I see it, I feel happy that you're still here with us," she said, with tears in her eyes.
She moved his legs onto the sofa and removed his leg brace.
"Sam, I'm sorry that ... you know ... that the sex has been so ....awkward ... lately,"
"Luka, you were badly injured. What do you expect? It takes time and I'm not complaining," she said.
"It's just that it's been ...."
"Shh!" she held a finger to his lips as she slowly removed his pants. There it was. That long scar that ran from the top of his leg right down his thigh; on the outer side of his knee and right down the front of his leg to his ankle. It was long and just about a quarter of an inch wide. It too was healing well but the leg was still very painful and still swollen.
"This one's ghastly," he whispered.
"Shh! I think its kind of masculine ... and so what if it it is ghastly? ... Most of all this scar reminds me that you risked everything to save my son and it also means that the best surgeons saved your leg, so that we could continue to do so much of the stuff we like to do together,"
Luka just looked at her. She meant every word. She wasn't patronizing him. There she was, this beautiful angel; loving him with all his scars, all his past pain and troubles. She just loved him.
"You need to undress me now," she instructed him, and he began.
"I like this song. What is it?" Sam asked as she kissed him slowly making her way down his torso. Dragging her fingers lightly from his shoulders, down his arms she grasped his hands in hers.
"It's 'Away from the Sun' ...Three Doors Down. Funny ... it reminds me of me ... that in spite of me ... I'm still here and ... ah ...I'm ... maybe ... still ...,"
"Still loved? Course you are. I love you," said Sam. They never watched the movie.