Seek and Go Hide
part twenty-two
Doug stood outside the hospital; the bright sun made him squint his eyes. Suddenly Jack was there next to him laughing, "'Bout time you got here!"
"Am I late?" Doug looked at his watch but it wasn't there. Time, I've lost track of it haven't I? I'm taking too long. Doug's thoughts were puzzled. When he looked up again, Jack was across the street. "Where are you going?" called Doug.
Jack didn't answer directly. He merely smiled and called out, "Come on Doug! Let's get going!"
"I'm sorry I'm late," called Doug as he tried to cross the street. The traffic was heavy and he wasn't an experienced jaywalker. He jumped back up on the curb as a taxi sped by. "Hold up, Jack. I'm coming."
Jack didn't appear to be waiting. He was walking swiftly up the street but he kept up a steady stream of encouragement for Doug, "This way. Come on! Cross now! Come on Doug! Let's go!"
Doug was getting frustrated and couldn't understand why Jack didn't just stop and wait. Or better yet, come back over to Doug's side of the street. He knew they had somewhere to be and he had made them late but still, he wanted Jack to slow down for just a minute. Then Doug realized he couldn't see Jack anymore. Without thinking or hesitating, he dashed across the street. He broke out into a run, desperate to catch up with Jack. He didn't have the least idea of where he was supposed to go; Jack had the directions and address. The people around Doug were a blur. The crowded street no longer seemed like an obstacle. After a few moments Doug stopped and looked around. There had to be a better answer than running around willy-nilly trying to play catch up. He needed to think.
Suddenly Jack jumped out in front of him, "Boo! You didn't think I left you did you? Dude, come on, I wouldn't really do that! But it's good to know you've still got some hustle left in you." Jack laughed and looked so happy and handsome that it didn't even occur to Doug to be upset. He was just happy he hadn't lost him.
Doug exhaled sharply and chuckled, "Good to know. So how much farther do we have to go anyway?"
"Well that depends..."
"On what?"
"On you."
"On Me?"
"Yeah. You're the one who has to get us there."
"But you know where we're going. You've been there. I haven't..."
Jack shrugged, "It's up to you man. You wanna go or not?"
"Yes, it's just..." Doug looked around the unfamiliar street, "I'm lost."
"No you're not," said Jack quietly. "You're right where you want to be." Jack took Doug's hands in his and whispered softly in his ear, "You're not lost. You're here. You're wonderful."
Doug couldn't help it; he glanced around to see if people were watching them. Jack's husky voice continued the hypnotic murmuring, "They don't care about you Doug but I do. You're not lost. You're beautiful and strong. When I see you...when I hear your voice...you're here but I can't have you... can't really touch you. But I want to Doug. More than anything. More than everything..."
The sweet, passionate words had the desired effect on Doug. He forgot about being lost. Forgot about being scared. Forgot about everything. Except Jack. He bent down slowly, his eyes locked on Jack's. He was shaking but he didn't let that stop him. His lips brushed softly against Jack's. Doug felt every nerve in his body come alive at the sensation. Again, more firmly this time, he kissed Jack. The sweet, wet, kiss got deeper and more intense until Doug thought the sheer pleasure of the moment was going to overtake him. He pressed his body against Jack's, their fingers intertwined, the blood sang in his ears. The moment seemed to last forever but all too soon the men parted. Both were breathing heavily. Jack let go of one of Doug's hands, and gently stroked his face. He touched his cheek and ran his fingers lightly over his lips and said, "Hey Sheriff Lazy McSleepypants, rise and shine! It's almost 8!"
Doug's eyes flew open to see Pacey, clad only in his boxers and an apron, standing over him and poking him with a wooden spoon. He felt the tingly sensation of the dream collapse in the blink of an eye. "Oh little brother you are so lucky I don't believe in early morning violence! Couldn't you have let me sleep a little bit longer?" He snatched the spoon away from Pacey and threw it across the room, "Quit poking me!"
"What's your problem?" laughed Pacey, "I've been up for almost an hour!"
Doug sat up on the couch and said, "So I smell. Is something burning?"
"Shit! The sausage!" Pacey ran toward the kitchen, giving Doug a clear view of his nearly naked state.
"For gods sake Pacey, put on some clothes! Cooking in your underwear can't be sanitary!"
"I washed my hands!" protested Pacey cheerfully. "Can you go to the store and buy some more sausage? This batch was defective." Pacey proved his point by bringing the smoking pan into the living room and showing Doug the blackened remains.
Doug coughed and said, "Right, faulty sausage, certainly not the chef's failing. I'll make you a deal -- I'll go to the store if you'll put some pants on. I'm not spending this morning watching your ass hang out of your shorts."
"One has to wonder, why you're so focused on my ass Dougie." Pacey laughed, turned around and playfully shook his butt at Doug, "I mean, I know it's a fine specimen worthy of much attention and admiration, but you're my brother dude! Is there something creepy you need to tell me?"
"Shut up Pacey! You know what I mean!" Doug laughed and headed for the bathroom, "I'm going to take a shower, when I come out you better be dressed!"
"Or else what?" teased Pacey as he scraped the ruined sausage into the trash.
"Or else you'll see," hollered Doug from the bathroom.
"Ooo, you're so vague and scary!" replied Pacey. He heard the shower come on and Doug didn't answer. "Last word – Pacey Witter." Pacey did a few deep bows to an imaginary audience then went and looked for his clothes.
----
The morning passed quickly in a rush of preparations and laughter. Doug returned from the store with the requested sausage and enough flowers to fill every vase in the small apartment. Pacey didn't know what had come over his brother but he liked it. Doug seemed remarkably relaxed and carefree.
By 11:30am all the brunch guests had arrived. Helen, Sophia, Walter, Darlene had all ooo-ed and aww-ed over the nursery and were now comfortably chatting and drinking mimosas and coffee. Jen, Amy, Jack and Grams were due to arrive in about half an hour. Doug was starting to feel nervous. What if Jen hates the nursery? What if Jack resents me for just taking over everything that needed to get done around the house? What if we don't have enough chairs?
Suddenly Doug remembered something, "Hey Pacey? Did you ever call Joey? Is she coming?"
Pacey felt all the blood drain from his face. He couldn't believe he had forgotten to call Joey. He'd procrastinated to the point of total negligence! Silently cursing his brain fade, he tried to play it cool. "Thanks for the reminder Doug, guess I better call her."
Pacey grabbed the phone and stepped out in the hall where it was quieter. He quickly dialed her home phone number – a number he knew by heart despite the fact that they seldom if ever spoke these days.
The phone rang twice and then the machine picked up. Joey's cheerful voice echoed in his ear and made his heart skip a beat. "Hi there! I'm sad to say that Joey and Chris' answering machine is broken. This is their refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. When they see it they'll call you back. Probably."
After the beep, Pacey left his message. "Hey Potter, it's your old pal Pacey. Look I just wanted to let you know that Jen had the baby and we're havin' a little welcome home brunch shindig for her today at her place. It's already started so you should get here as soon as you can. Sorry about the late notice... you should ah...blame Jack for that. Not me. Ok, hope we see you soon."
Pacey hung up the phone and wondered if he would in fact see Joey today. And if he did, would he be able to have casual chitchat with her without demanding to know who Chris was and why they shared a refrigerator. He sighed, put on a happy face, and returned to the party.
----
Joey felt her heart skip a beat when she heard Pacey's voice on the answering machine but promptly told herself it was due to the news that Jen had given birth. She had been screening her phone calls because she was trying to get some extra work done before Monday morning's big meeting. But that didn't seem too important all of a sudden. Jen had her baby! Pacey's in town! There's a party and I'm basically already late! Joey's thoughts were a jumble as she rushed to change her clothes and get ready to go.
----
Jen was overwhelmed by the surprise awaiting her when she got home. Amy was quickly passed over to Grams waiting arms while Jen laughed and hugged and thanked everyone. "Jack! Did you know about this?" She tried to take in everything around her. The apartment was sparkling clean and filled with food and flowers and presents.
"I had no idea Jen! I know you hate surprises!" insisted Jack happily. He looked over at Doug and shook his head a tiny bit. He felt his smile widen. Doug just shrugged and looked embarrassed.
"I hate surprises!" agreed Jen though her look of joyful radiance betrayed her words.
"Well, prepare to get your hate on," laughed Pacey, "because there's more!"
"More! How could there be..?"
Pacey said, "Close your eyes." When Jen didn't do so, he clapped his hand over her eyes and said, "No fair peaking! Just a few steps this way." He guided her smoothly over to the nursery, "A little more, back up, go forward, to the left, no back up, no forward..."
"Pacey!" Jen elbowed him in the stomach, "You are rapidly turning my jubilant hate of surprises into hateful hate of you!" Jen's hands were on her hips and she tried to turn her head and get away from Pacey's hands. But he held her tight.
"Settle down there little momma! Ok, right here, take a step, whoa, stop, right there. Perfect. We're here." He uncovered her eyes just as Doug pushed open the pocket doors.
Jen gasped when she saw the room in front of her. The walls had been painted a lovely shade of lavender and the trim was a beautiful shade of raspberry red. A false window had been hung on one of the shorter walls. It was decked out in a cheerful striped curtain that had the cutest red pom- pom trim. The "view" consisted of large photo of the creek that ran behind Gram's old house in Capeside – it was the view from Jen's old bedroom.
The crib had been assembled and filled with a red quilt, a purple stuffed bunny and several small pillows. Above it hung a delicate butterfly mobile that moved with the slightest breeze.
There was a pink changing table all set up and ready to go. A small rocker sat in the corner. The floor was covered in a red, lavender, pink and yellow flowered rug. A shabby chic pink crystal lamp hung from the ceiling. The walls were covered in framed pictures from classic children's stories. Jen saw the Pokey Little Puppy, Alice in Wonderland, Dorothy and the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz, Sam I Am, and even The Stinky Cheese Man.
Jen's eyes were filled with tears, "How...when...Pacey? You didn't do all this..."
"Hey! I helped!"
Jen turned to Jack, "Jack did you..?"
Jack shook his head, "Don't look at me..."
Jen's eyes fell on Doug and instantly she knew, "Doug! Of course you did this!" She hugged the self-conscious man who had been more or less silent since she had arrived, "Thank you. Thank you! It's absolutely perfect."
Doug voice caught in his throat as he said, "I'm so glad you like it."
"Like it? I love it! The colors are perfect!" Jen let go of Doug and turned to Jack and said, "See I told you pink wasn't too girly!"
Jack rolled his eyes good-naturedly and was about to say something when Pacey interjected jovially, "And I repeat, I helped! Quite a bit."
Jen hugged Pacey, "Yes of course! Thank you too Pacey! By the way, what smells so good?"
"That my dear is brunch! And yes, there are creamed onions!"
Jen smiled, leave it to Pacey. He really did remember almost everything. "Then what are we waiting for? Let's eat!"
----
The party was in full swing. Everyone was laughing and eating and toasting baby Amy, who, for her part, slept through it all. A little before 2 o'clock there was a knock at the front door. Jen got up to open it and found Joey standing there a huge smile on her face.
"Jen! Congratulations! How are you?" Joey impulsively hugged her old friend relieved to see that Jen still looked like Jen. "You look fabulous! I'm sorry I'm late..." Joey handed Jen a colorful gift bag and continued, "I didn't know until this morning..."
"Shut up! I don't care if you're late! I'm just glad you're here!" Jen pulled Joey into the living room and said, "Look everyone it's Capeside's own Joey Potter! And she brought me presents!"
Everyone greeted Joey merrily and Jen made the necessary quick introductions. Once that was done and Joey was settled with a heaping plate of food, Jen opened her present and chatted cheerfully with her old friends. "Oh! What a cute little hat," exclaimed Jen as she unwrapped part of Joey's gift. "Dear god, I'm turning into one of those squeally women. Motherhood really changes a person. Ooo! Look at this!" Jen held up a hooded yellow ducky bath towel for all to see.
Pacey wasted no time and immediately began to tease Joey, "Nice of you to join us Potter. Thanks for making room in your busy, busy schedule."
"As you well know Witter, no one bothered to call me until this morning otherwise I would have gotten here sooner – at least soon enough to stop you from inflicting creamed onions on us!"
Jen had pulled a thin, square wrapped gift out of the bag Joey had given her and said, "Let me guess...a cd?"
"Ah, but what cd Carnak?" joked Jack as he shoveled yet another mouthful of banana-walnut pancakes in his mouth.
"One way to find out," laughed Jen as she ripped the paper off. "Joan Jett: The Definitive Anthology. Well, I definitively don't already have it."
"It's a well known fact that babies love The Blackhearts," said Joey with mock solemnity.
"Babies and drunk bikers," chimed in Pacey helpfully.
"And," continued Joey totally ignoring Pacey, "Joan Jett is very empowering."
"Well, I'm all for that! Thanks Jo! Now eat up before your eggs get cold!"
"Don't have to tell me twice! Where'd all this food come from anyway?"
"Pacey raided the Ice House and then cooked his fingers to the bone," answered Jack.
"Cooked his fingers? To the bone? That's gross Jack!" Jen screwed up her face and stuck her tongue out.
"It's just an expression," asserted Jack with a grin.
"Well it's a disgusting expression and some of us are trying to eat our weight in pie here!" Jen noticed the blank, semi-shocked look on Joey's face, "What's wrong Joey?"
"The Ice House?" Joey looked frantically from Jen to Jack to Pacey and back to Jen. Pacey looked at his shoes uncertain what to say.
Jack was oblivious to the tension and said, "Yeah, you heard Pacey reopened the Ice House didn't you? It's going great too. Open what? five months and still the talk of the town."
Joey stood up and set her plate on the coffee table, "Pacey could I speak to you for a minute. In the hall."
"Your eggs will get cold Potter."
Joey didn't respond and she didn't wait; she walked out the front door without another word. She paced back and forth in the hallway and tried to calm down but a strange mixture of claustrophobia, anger and regret rushed through her blood made her want to scream. When Pacey finally came out to talk to her she was breathing rapidly and her face was stormy.
"Jo?" said Pacey cautiously.
"You reopened the Ice House." It wasn't a question and the hurt in her voice was obvious.
"I thought you knew..." Pacey was unsure what to say. He really had thought she would have heard about it from someone by now. He mentally chastised himself for being nine kinds of wuss and not being man enough to tell her himself.
"The Ice House? Pacey...why?" Joey leaned against the wall and slowly slid down it until she was sitting with her head on her knees. The claustrophobic feeling was getting stronger.
"It was a good business decision and ...are you going to throw up Potter? Should I get a bucket?" Pacey's concern was apparent in his voice.
She looked up at him with her big brown eyes and said, "The Ice House, my Dad...why can't you just let the past die Pacey?" A single tear slipped down her cheek.
Pacey sighed and sat down next to her, "The past never dies Jo. It gets farther away. It fades but it's never gone." He reached over to hold her hand but she yanked it away from him. "It's never finished. And excuse me for feeling like some things are worth hanging on to."
"It's my past Pacey! God! You had no right!"
"I had every right Jo – that place has been sitting empty for years. Wasting away...all this potential and nothing happening. I wanted to change that and I did!"
Joey heard the conviction in his voice and it touched something in her, "Since when does wasted potential register with Pacey Witter?"
"Since it does ok? Maybe a person can only squander so much, throw so much away before a person realizes what is actually real and valuable."
Pacey looked at Joey and she couldn't look away. The air between them was filled with electricity, emotion and history. After a long moment she tore her eyes away and started at her shoes. She sighed, "Still you should have told me..."
"I thought Bessie would have said something..."
"Well she didn't."
"Well yell at her."
"Well I will...Pacey? Is it...?" Joey couldn't finish her question; she didn't need to.
"It's beautiful Jo. It's yesterday, today and tomorrow. It's...You should see it."
Joey looked into Pacey handsome, hope-filled face and whispered, "Maybe..." The bittersweet smile on her face told Pacey almost everything.
Just then the door to Jen's apartment flew open and Jen stood there holding Amy. "Don't mind me, I just thought you two might want a break from all the emotional falderal what with this being a party and all." She flashed them a quick sheepish grin.
Joey stood up and said, "Good thinking Jen."
"Always said you were smarter than the average bear," agreed Pacey reluctantly. He didn't stand up.
"And look who's awake!" cooed Joey "Can I hold her?"
"Of course you can," said Jen as she passed the small bundle over. "Amy, this is your brilliant Aunt Joey. She'll teach you all about triangles and loyalty, kicking ass and determination."
"Please don't encourage the ass kicking," groused Pacey from his spot on the floor.
Joey took the baby, harrumphed at Pacey and went back inside the apartment.
"You coming Pace?" asked Jen.
"In a minute," said Pacey. "Hey could you send Jack and Doug out here for me?"
Jen looked quizzically at Pacey but only said, "Sure thing." She went back inside and closed the door but quickly opened it again and leaned out, "What are you up to?"
"Me? Nothing. Ever." Pacey winked at Jen and gestured for her to go away.
A few minutes later Jack and Doug came out into the hallway. Jack handed Pacey a beer and sat down next to him, "What's up dude?"
"Oh you know...Doug you gonna sit down?"
"Not if I don't have to." Both men looked at him like he was crazy. "The floor. It's dirty." He sighed and sat down, "Fine, sure. Happy now?"
"So Pacey," began Jack, "What's wrong?"
"Wrong? What makes you think something is wrong? I just thought..." Pacey stood up swiftly, "You two could use some time to talk. Thanks for the beer." And with that Pacey disappeared into the apartment. Both Jack and Doug heard the turn of the three locks on the door. The two men just looked at each other.
Doug was the first to speak and said, "Well what Pacey lacks in subtlety he makes up for with an abundance of artless impudence."
Jack chuckled, "I guess I don't exactly mind having a minute to say thank you. What you did...it's just unbelievable. I'll never be able to thank you enough..."
Doug felt a flush creep up his face. Gruffly he said, "I didn't do it for you, you know." He regretted the words the second they left his mouth.
Jack looked taken aback and hurt. He sputtered, "I...of course...ah...I mean...you...uhmm."
"Ok that's not true. I did do it partially for you but I also did it for Jen and Amy. And you." Doug tried to lighten the mood, "Just don't go getting a big head about it ok."
"Seriously dude, thanks." Jack stared at Doug and smiled softly. Without realizing it, Jack licked his lips; he wished more than anything that he could kiss Doug right there in Jen's hallway. His desire was written all over his face.
Doug felt his knees go weak and was very glad he was sitting down, "You're welcome. But could you not call me dude?"
Jack burst out laughing, "You're killing me Doug. You really are." Jack ran his hands though his hair and shook his head at Doug. "God. Killing me." He smiled at Doug, "You know that right?"
Doug smiled back at Jack and nodded, "I know. I don't mean to."
"I know."
They sat in silence for a moment. Doug's voice was hoarse when he finally spoke, "I guess we should talk."
"Yeah, I guess so."
----
Author's note: Thanks to everyone for their feedback and encouragement – especially SamCnd who seems to know just when to poke at me. :) The opening bit of this chapter was just for you folks who are dying of anticipation for some Doug & Jack action. I hope you don't think I'm dragging it out too too much! According to the timeline Jack and Doug have another six months before they finally really get together for real. But there's still some good, mushy stuff in the near future I promise! This chapter's kinda heavy on Joey/Pacey – what can I say? I love them too. And if anyone is wondering, we haven't seen the last of Cliff and Olivia. I apologize for any typos -- I'm anxious to get this chapter up since it's been so long since the last update. If anything looks too crazy, I'll try and fix it in the next day or so but hopefully it all makes sense.
part twenty-two
Doug stood outside the hospital; the bright sun made him squint his eyes. Suddenly Jack was there next to him laughing, "'Bout time you got here!"
"Am I late?" Doug looked at his watch but it wasn't there. Time, I've lost track of it haven't I? I'm taking too long. Doug's thoughts were puzzled. When he looked up again, Jack was across the street. "Where are you going?" called Doug.
Jack didn't answer directly. He merely smiled and called out, "Come on Doug! Let's get going!"
"I'm sorry I'm late," called Doug as he tried to cross the street. The traffic was heavy and he wasn't an experienced jaywalker. He jumped back up on the curb as a taxi sped by. "Hold up, Jack. I'm coming."
Jack didn't appear to be waiting. He was walking swiftly up the street but he kept up a steady stream of encouragement for Doug, "This way. Come on! Cross now! Come on Doug! Let's go!"
Doug was getting frustrated and couldn't understand why Jack didn't just stop and wait. Or better yet, come back over to Doug's side of the street. He knew they had somewhere to be and he had made them late but still, he wanted Jack to slow down for just a minute. Then Doug realized he couldn't see Jack anymore. Without thinking or hesitating, he dashed across the street. He broke out into a run, desperate to catch up with Jack. He didn't have the least idea of where he was supposed to go; Jack had the directions and address. The people around Doug were a blur. The crowded street no longer seemed like an obstacle. After a few moments Doug stopped and looked around. There had to be a better answer than running around willy-nilly trying to play catch up. He needed to think.
Suddenly Jack jumped out in front of him, "Boo! You didn't think I left you did you? Dude, come on, I wouldn't really do that! But it's good to know you've still got some hustle left in you." Jack laughed and looked so happy and handsome that it didn't even occur to Doug to be upset. He was just happy he hadn't lost him.
Doug exhaled sharply and chuckled, "Good to know. So how much farther do we have to go anyway?"
"Well that depends..."
"On what?"
"On you."
"On Me?"
"Yeah. You're the one who has to get us there."
"But you know where we're going. You've been there. I haven't..."
Jack shrugged, "It's up to you man. You wanna go or not?"
"Yes, it's just..." Doug looked around the unfamiliar street, "I'm lost."
"No you're not," said Jack quietly. "You're right where you want to be." Jack took Doug's hands in his and whispered softly in his ear, "You're not lost. You're here. You're wonderful."
Doug couldn't help it; he glanced around to see if people were watching them. Jack's husky voice continued the hypnotic murmuring, "They don't care about you Doug but I do. You're not lost. You're beautiful and strong. When I see you...when I hear your voice...you're here but I can't have you... can't really touch you. But I want to Doug. More than anything. More than everything..."
The sweet, passionate words had the desired effect on Doug. He forgot about being lost. Forgot about being scared. Forgot about everything. Except Jack. He bent down slowly, his eyes locked on Jack's. He was shaking but he didn't let that stop him. His lips brushed softly against Jack's. Doug felt every nerve in his body come alive at the sensation. Again, more firmly this time, he kissed Jack. The sweet, wet, kiss got deeper and more intense until Doug thought the sheer pleasure of the moment was going to overtake him. He pressed his body against Jack's, their fingers intertwined, the blood sang in his ears. The moment seemed to last forever but all too soon the men parted. Both were breathing heavily. Jack let go of one of Doug's hands, and gently stroked his face. He touched his cheek and ran his fingers lightly over his lips and said, "Hey Sheriff Lazy McSleepypants, rise and shine! It's almost 8!"
Doug's eyes flew open to see Pacey, clad only in his boxers and an apron, standing over him and poking him with a wooden spoon. He felt the tingly sensation of the dream collapse in the blink of an eye. "Oh little brother you are so lucky I don't believe in early morning violence! Couldn't you have let me sleep a little bit longer?" He snatched the spoon away from Pacey and threw it across the room, "Quit poking me!"
"What's your problem?" laughed Pacey, "I've been up for almost an hour!"
Doug sat up on the couch and said, "So I smell. Is something burning?"
"Shit! The sausage!" Pacey ran toward the kitchen, giving Doug a clear view of his nearly naked state.
"For gods sake Pacey, put on some clothes! Cooking in your underwear can't be sanitary!"
"I washed my hands!" protested Pacey cheerfully. "Can you go to the store and buy some more sausage? This batch was defective." Pacey proved his point by bringing the smoking pan into the living room and showing Doug the blackened remains.
Doug coughed and said, "Right, faulty sausage, certainly not the chef's failing. I'll make you a deal -- I'll go to the store if you'll put some pants on. I'm not spending this morning watching your ass hang out of your shorts."
"One has to wonder, why you're so focused on my ass Dougie." Pacey laughed, turned around and playfully shook his butt at Doug, "I mean, I know it's a fine specimen worthy of much attention and admiration, but you're my brother dude! Is there something creepy you need to tell me?"
"Shut up Pacey! You know what I mean!" Doug laughed and headed for the bathroom, "I'm going to take a shower, when I come out you better be dressed!"
"Or else what?" teased Pacey as he scraped the ruined sausage into the trash.
"Or else you'll see," hollered Doug from the bathroom.
"Ooo, you're so vague and scary!" replied Pacey. He heard the shower come on and Doug didn't answer. "Last word – Pacey Witter." Pacey did a few deep bows to an imaginary audience then went and looked for his clothes.
----
The morning passed quickly in a rush of preparations and laughter. Doug returned from the store with the requested sausage and enough flowers to fill every vase in the small apartment. Pacey didn't know what had come over his brother but he liked it. Doug seemed remarkably relaxed and carefree.
By 11:30am all the brunch guests had arrived. Helen, Sophia, Walter, Darlene had all ooo-ed and aww-ed over the nursery and were now comfortably chatting and drinking mimosas and coffee. Jen, Amy, Jack and Grams were due to arrive in about half an hour. Doug was starting to feel nervous. What if Jen hates the nursery? What if Jack resents me for just taking over everything that needed to get done around the house? What if we don't have enough chairs?
Suddenly Doug remembered something, "Hey Pacey? Did you ever call Joey? Is she coming?"
Pacey felt all the blood drain from his face. He couldn't believe he had forgotten to call Joey. He'd procrastinated to the point of total negligence! Silently cursing his brain fade, he tried to play it cool. "Thanks for the reminder Doug, guess I better call her."
Pacey grabbed the phone and stepped out in the hall where it was quieter. He quickly dialed her home phone number – a number he knew by heart despite the fact that they seldom if ever spoke these days.
The phone rang twice and then the machine picked up. Joey's cheerful voice echoed in his ear and made his heart skip a beat. "Hi there! I'm sad to say that Joey and Chris' answering machine is broken. This is their refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. When they see it they'll call you back. Probably."
After the beep, Pacey left his message. "Hey Potter, it's your old pal Pacey. Look I just wanted to let you know that Jen had the baby and we're havin' a little welcome home brunch shindig for her today at her place. It's already started so you should get here as soon as you can. Sorry about the late notice... you should ah...blame Jack for that. Not me. Ok, hope we see you soon."
Pacey hung up the phone and wondered if he would in fact see Joey today. And if he did, would he be able to have casual chitchat with her without demanding to know who Chris was and why they shared a refrigerator. He sighed, put on a happy face, and returned to the party.
----
Joey felt her heart skip a beat when she heard Pacey's voice on the answering machine but promptly told herself it was due to the news that Jen had given birth. She had been screening her phone calls because she was trying to get some extra work done before Monday morning's big meeting. But that didn't seem too important all of a sudden. Jen had her baby! Pacey's in town! There's a party and I'm basically already late! Joey's thoughts were a jumble as she rushed to change her clothes and get ready to go.
----
Jen was overwhelmed by the surprise awaiting her when she got home. Amy was quickly passed over to Grams waiting arms while Jen laughed and hugged and thanked everyone. "Jack! Did you know about this?" She tried to take in everything around her. The apartment was sparkling clean and filled with food and flowers and presents.
"I had no idea Jen! I know you hate surprises!" insisted Jack happily. He looked over at Doug and shook his head a tiny bit. He felt his smile widen. Doug just shrugged and looked embarrassed.
"I hate surprises!" agreed Jen though her look of joyful radiance betrayed her words.
"Well, prepare to get your hate on," laughed Pacey, "because there's more!"
"More! How could there be..?"
Pacey said, "Close your eyes." When Jen didn't do so, he clapped his hand over her eyes and said, "No fair peaking! Just a few steps this way." He guided her smoothly over to the nursery, "A little more, back up, go forward, to the left, no back up, no forward..."
"Pacey!" Jen elbowed him in the stomach, "You are rapidly turning my jubilant hate of surprises into hateful hate of you!" Jen's hands were on her hips and she tried to turn her head and get away from Pacey's hands. But he held her tight.
"Settle down there little momma! Ok, right here, take a step, whoa, stop, right there. Perfect. We're here." He uncovered her eyes just as Doug pushed open the pocket doors.
Jen gasped when she saw the room in front of her. The walls had been painted a lovely shade of lavender and the trim was a beautiful shade of raspberry red. A false window had been hung on one of the shorter walls. It was decked out in a cheerful striped curtain that had the cutest red pom- pom trim. The "view" consisted of large photo of the creek that ran behind Gram's old house in Capeside – it was the view from Jen's old bedroom.
The crib had been assembled and filled with a red quilt, a purple stuffed bunny and several small pillows. Above it hung a delicate butterfly mobile that moved with the slightest breeze.
There was a pink changing table all set up and ready to go. A small rocker sat in the corner. The floor was covered in a red, lavender, pink and yellow flowered rug. A shabby chic pink crystal lamp hung from the ceiling. The walls were covered in framed pictures from classic children's stories. Jen saw the Pokey Little Puppy, Alice in Wonderland, Dorothy and the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz, Sam I Am, and even The Stinky Cheese Man.
Jen's eyes were filled with tears, "How...when...Pacey? You didn't do all this..."
"Hey! I helped!"
Jen turned to Jack, "Jack did you..?"
Jack shook his head, "Don't look at me..."
Jen's eyes fell on Doug and instantly she knew, "Doug! Of course you did this!" She hugged the self-conscious man who had been more or less silent since she had arrived, "Thank you. Thank you! It's absolutely perfect."
Doug voice caught in his throat as he said, "I'm so glad you like it."
"Like it? I love it! The colors are perfect!" Jen let go of Doug and turned to Jack and said, "See I told you pink wasn't too girly!"
Jack rolled his eyes good-naturedly and was about to say something when Pacey interjected jovially, "And I repeat, I helped! Quite a bit."
Jen hugged Pacey, "Yes of course! Thank you too Pacey! By the way, what smells so good?"
"That my dear is brunch! And yes, there are creamed onions!"
Jen smiled, leave it to Pacey. He really did remember almost everything. "Then what are we waiting for? Let's eat!"
----
The party was in full swing. Everyone was laughing and eating and toasting baby Amy, who, for her part, slept through it all. A little before 2 o'clock there was a knock at the front door. Jen got up to open it and found Joey standing there a huge smile on her face.
"Jen! Congratulations! How are you?" Joey impulsively hugged her old friend relieved to see that Jen still looked like Jen. "You look fabulous! I'm sorry I'm late..." Joey handed Jen a colorful gift bag and continued, "I didn't know until this morning..."
"Shut up! I don't care if you're late! I'm just glad you're here!" Jen pulled Joey into the living room and said, "Look everyone it's Capeside's own Joey Potter! And she brought me presents!"
Everyone greeted Joey merrily and Jen made the necessary quick introductions. Once that was done and Joey was settled with a heaping plate of food, Jen opened her present and chatted cheerfully with her old friends. "Oh! What a cute little hat," exclaimed Jen as she unwrapped part of Joey's gift. "Dear god, I'm turning into one of those squeally women. Motherhood really changes a person. Ooo! Look at this!" Jen held up a hooded yellow ducky bath towel for all to see.
Pacey wasted no time and immediately began to tease Joey, "Nice of you to join us Potter. Thanks for making room in your busy, busy schedule."
"As you well know Witter, no one bothered to call me until this morning otherwise I would have gotten here sooner – at least soon enough to stop you from inflicting creamed onions on us!"
Jen had pulled a thin, square wrapped gift out of the bag Joey had given her and said, "Let me guess...a cd?"
"Ah, but what cd Carnak?" joked Jack as he shoveled yet another mouthful of banana-walnut pancakes in his mouth.
"One way to find out," laughed Jen as she ripped the paper off. "Joan Jett: The Definitive Anthology. Well, I definitively don't already have it."
"It's a well known fact that babies love The Blackhearts," said Joey with mock solemnity.
"Babies and drunk bikers," chimed in Pacey helpfully.
"And," continued Joey totally ignoring Pacey, "Joan Jett is very empowering."
"Well, I'm all for that! Thanks Jo! Now eat up before your eggs get cold!"
"Don't have to tell me twice! Where'd all this food come from anyway?"
"Pacey raided the Ice House and then cooked his fingers to the bone," answered Jack.
"Cooked his fingers? To the bone? That's gross Jack!" Jen screwed up her face and stuck her tongue out.
"It's just an expression," asserted Jack with a grin.
"Well it's a disgusting expression and some of us are trying to eat our weight in pie here!" Jen noticed the blank, semi-shocked look on Joey's face, "What's wrong Joey?"
"The Ice House?" Joey looked frantically from Jen to Jack to Pacey and back to Jen. Pacey looked at his shoes uncertain what to say.
Jack was oblivious to the tension and said, "Yeah, you heard Pacey reopened the Ice House didn't you? It's going great too. Open what? five months and still the talk of the town."
Joey stood up and set her plate on the coffee table, "Pacey could I speak to you for a minute. In the hall."
"Your eggs will get cold Potter."
Joey didn't respond and she didn't wait; she walked out the front door without another word. She paced back and forth in the hallway and tried to calm down but a strange mixture of claustrophobia, anger and regret rushed through her blood made her want to scream. When Pacey finally came out to talk to her she was breathing rapidly and her face was stormy.
"Jo?" said Pacey cautiously.
"You reopened the Ice House." It wasn't a question and the hurt in her voice was obvious.
"I thought you knew..." Pacey was unsure what to say. He really had thought she would have heard about it from someone by now. He mentally chastised himself for being nine kinds of wuss and not being man enough to tell her himself.
"The Ice House? Pacey...why?" Joey leaned against the wall and slowly slid down it until she was sitting with her head on her knees. The claustrophobic feeling was getting stronger.
"It was a good business decision and ...are you going to throw up Potter? Should I get a bucket?" Pacey's concern was apparent in his voice.
She looked up at him with her big brown eyes and said, "The Ice House, my Dad...why can't you just let the past die Pacey?" A single tear slipped down her cheek.
Pacey sighed and sat down next to her, "The past never dies Jo. It gets farther away. It fades but it's never gone." He reached over to hold her hand but she yanked it away from him. "It's never finished. And excuse me for feeling like some things are worth hanging on to."
"It's my past Pacey! God! You had no right!"
"I had every right Jo – that place has been sitting empty for years. Wasting away...all this potential and nothing happening. I wanted to change that and I did!"
Joey heard the conviction in his voice and it touched something in her, "Since when does wasted potential register with Pacey Witter?"
"Since it does ok? Maybe a person can only squander so much, throw so much away before a person realizes what is actually real and valuable."
Pacey looked at Joey and she couldn't look away. The air between them was filled with electricity, emotion and history. After a long moment she tore her eyes away and started at her shoes. She sighed, "Still you should have told me..."
"I thought Bessie would have said something..."
"Well she didn't."
"Well yell at her."
"Well I will...Pacey? Is it...?" Joey couldn't finish her question; she didn't need to.
"It's beautiful Jo. It's yesterday, today and tomorrow. It's...You should see it."
Joey looked into Pacey handsome, hope-filled face and whispered, "Maybe..." The bittersweet smile on her face told Pacey almost everything.
Just then the door to Jen's apartment flew open and Jen stood there holding Amy. "Don't mind me, I just thought you two might want a break from all the emotional falderal what with this being a party and all." She flashed them a quick sheepish grin.
Joey stood up and said, "Good thinking Jen."
"Always said you were smarter than the average bear," agreed Pacey reluctantly. He didn't stand up.
"And look who's awake!" cooed Joey "Can I hold her?"
"Of course you can," said Jen as she passed the small bundle over. "Amy, this is your brilliant Aunt Joey. She'll teach you all about triangles and loyalty, kicking ass and determination."
"Please don't encourage the ass kicking," groused Pacey from his spot on the floor.
Joey took the baby, harrumphed at Pacey and went back inside the apartment.
"You coming Pace?" asked Jen.
"In a minute," said Pacey. "Hey could you send Jack and Doug out here for me?"
Jen looked quizzically at Pacey but only said, "Sure thing." She went back inside and closed the door but quickly opened it again and leaned out, "What are you up to?"
"Me? Nothing. Ever." Pacey winked at Jen and gestured for her to go away.
A few minutes later Jack and Doug came out into the hallway. Jack handed Pacey a beer and sat down next to him, "What's up dude?"
"Oh you know...Doug you gonna sit down?"
"Not if I don't have to." Both men looked at him like he was crazy. "The floor. It's dirty." He sighed and sat down, "Fine, sure. Happy now?"
"So Pacey," began Jack, "What's wrong?"
"Wrong? What makes you think something is wrong? I just thought..." Pacey stood up swiftly, "You two could use some time to talk. Thanks for the beer." And with that Pacey disappeared into the apartment. Both Jack and Doug heard the turn of the three locks on the door. The two men just looked at each other.
Doug was the first to speak and said, "Well what Pacey lacks in subtlety he makes up for with an abundance of artless impudence."
Jack chuckled, "I guess I don't exactly mind having a minute to say thank you. What you did...it's just unbelievable. I'll never be able to thank you enough..."
Doug felt a flush creep up his face. Gruffly he said, "I didn't do it for you, you know." He regretted the words the second they left his mouth.
Jack looked taken aback and hurt. He sputtered, "I...of course...ah...I mean...you...uhmm."
"Ok that's not true. I did do it partially for you but I also did it for Jen and Amy. And you." Doug tried to lighten the mood, "Just don't go getting a big head about it ok."
"Seriously dude, thanks." Jack stared at Doug and smiled softly. Without realizing it, Jack licked his lips; he wished more than anything that he could kiss Doug right there in Jen's hallway. His desire was written all over his face.
Doug felt his knees go weak and was very glad he was sitting down, "You're welcome. But could you not call me dude?"
Jack burst out laughing, "You're killing me Doug. You really are." Jack ran his hands though his hair and shook his head at Doug. "God. Killing me." He smiled at Doug, "You know that right?"
Doug smiled back at Jack and nodded, "I know. I don't mean to."
"I know."
They sat in silence for a moment. Doug's voice was hoarse when he finally spoke, "I guess we should talk."
"Yeah, I guess so."
----
The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide
I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
-- Collide
- By Howie Day
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide
I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
-- Collide
- By Howie Day
Author's note: Thanks to everyone for their feedback and encouragement – especially SamCnd who seems to know just when to poke at me. :) The opening bit of this chapter was just for you folks who are dying of anticipation for some Doug & Jack action. I hope you don't think I'm dragging it out too too much! According to the timeline Jack and Doug have another six months before they finally really get together for real. But there's still some good, mushy stuff in the near future I promise! This chapter's kinda heavy on Joey/Pacey – what can I say? I love them too. And if anyone is wondering, we haven't seen the last of Cliff and Olivia. I apologize for any typos -- I'm anxious to get this chapter up since it's been so long since the last update. If anything looks too crazy, I'll try and fix it in the next day or so but hopefully it all makes sense.