Within Holy Walls
A Final Fantasy Tactics fanfic
By Tenshi no Ai
I don't own the characters and locations in the game that are presented in this work, Square-Enix does.
But I digress.
I'm twenty-four years old and a Taurus, born May twelfth in Pantora twenty-three. I'm a Knight Blade, which is the lowest ranking of the elite knights. I would've been one of the youngest White Knights in history, but after that incident four years ago...never mind. It's already done with, no need to bring up old news.
Igros is my hometown, and I used to be a part of the Hokuten. But after my stint with them, I decided to fully enter the Church and join the Shrine Knights. I served in Warjilis for a couple of months before I was transferred to Lionel castle town. I've been here ever since...just a little over two years. It's a nice town, all lively and bustling. Nothing like Igros, but you can't have everything.
I think what I really love most about this place is being with the Knights. I'm not the only one who feels this way, either. It's like being with a dysfunctional family...okay, it's less melodramatic than that. But if something should happen to any one of us, the rest of us would immediately run and help that guy.
That's what family is for, right?
---------
Interlude #1: The Lionel Holy Knights
Ahh, damn that was a lotta hours!
Every year, Lionel castle town holds a ball for all the nobles. It's really big and really fancy, and if I'm really lucky I only have to work eighteen hours straight because of it. Sir Kadmus is still fixing out the kinks with scheduling, but basically we all have to work two straight shifts, seven at night to one in the morning, and one in the morning to seven in the morning. Like last year, I got the one in the afternoon to seven at night shift on that day, so by the time I finish my eighteen hours I just want to sleep for a day. Maybe two.
Eh, Sam, don't you think that was too much? And meanwhile, Sir Kadmus gets to go to the ball with that hella beautiful Reis...man, he picked a good one to break the rules with...
I turn to my good friend, Ryan Mikner. He has a penchant for ruining the Ivalician language. I say wearily, what was that word you used?
He looks over at me, brown eyes rimmed with red, which one?
That one you said before
Oh, hella'? What about it?
My eyes hurt. I run my gloved hands through my longish bangs, trying to stay awake long enough to reach the barracks and my bed. Nah, the floor's good enough for me. The others lagging behind us can stumble over my body for all I care. That seriously can't be a real word, I mutter, even for those weirdoes in Warjilis.
Hey, that's my hometown you're talking about, he grins. That's disgusting that he can still use up that much energy after almost a day straight of patrolling, have some respect.
Sure, when you have some respect for the Ivalician language, oh, I can see the door to the barracks just ahead...
Hey, my cousin is just as bad and you're still marrying her, he retorts. He's got a point there.
Alia Mikner is my fiancé. Like the cousin she's two years older than, she's got this ability to keep talking and using weird words while she does so, except... Yeah, but there's this fundamental difference between the two of you.
He looks at me curiously. What's that? She's got breasts?
...Other than that. I can stand her, I say dryly, looking straight ahead. My vision usually isn't this blurry... that's the door up ahead, right?
he looks at me oddly, you okay?
I nod once, eyes focused only on the door. Don't worry about me. Hey, Sir Kadmus is probably asleep, so keep it down.
Ryan grabs my upper arm, steadying me. I needed that. I betcha he's not there.
I glance at him. Where's he going to be if he's not sleeping?
Maybe he's with Miss Reis, he grins.
It's seven in the morning, what would he be doing with Miss Dular at seven in the m-oh, yeah, maybe the others are right when they say I'm naive, I'll take that bet, I say confidently. Sir Kadmus is nothing if not proper, and Miss Dular...no, there's no way.
Ryan reaches the door, smirking at me. Let's find out, hm? He pushes the door open and we step inside. No deep breathing, no body on the top bunk in the upper left-hand corner of the room, nothing...
Oh my God. He was actually right about something.
He laughs. Well, Sir Kadmus is human, right?
I guess. Same for Miss Dular too. Still, it's seven. The sun's rising, the church is probably waking up right now...they'd have to be idiots to still be in bed at this hour. Like it or not--and all of us knights hate it after Takeo left to be with his exiled girlfriend--but that's still breaking the rules.
I'll think about it later. Right now, I'm ready to collapse.
-----
Geez. It's bright in here. Covering my eyes with my left forearm, I yawn. Hey, anybody here?
Ryan says in the bunk above mine, most of the others went to the baths or for lunch, and Sir Kadmus is in his office.
But I didn't hear him respond. You sure?
The bed creaks above my head. Yeah, the door's closed.
He never closes the door, though, Sir Kadmus is very much a wander in and talk to me, I don't mind!' sort of person, you sure he's there?
Yeah, I saw him walk in bout an hour after we got in--
You were still awake then? It's one thing to make up weird words, but that's just disturbing.
Well, you were snoring, and Klassner and Quinely were talking in their sleep, he sounds annoyed. I raise an eyebrow. I didn't know I snore, anyway, Sir Kadmus was pissed off and he closed his door. Been like that all day.
Wait, wait. We really talking about the same guy? Sure it was Sir Kadmus? That guy's perpetually in a good mood.
Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating a bit. He definitely wasn't happy, though.
Hm. Then he probably wasn't with Miss Dular this morning, God, I feel like a woman, talking behind Sir Kadmus' back like this.
It's still kind of interesting, though.
The bunk creaks more and more until Ryan jumps off the end, going over to me and sitting on the lower bunk to my right. Guess he messed up pretty bad when they... he trails off suggestively, and I roll my eyes.
Thanks for that horrible thought, well, if I'm awake now... can you reach under my bunk and grab my paper and a pen?
Sure thing, bro, he mutters. I raise an eyebrow. Another one of his weird words? He grabs my sheaf of papers and a pen, tossing them on my stomach, you writing to Lia?
I don't have anybody else to write to, I say quietly, moving back so I can sit up, collecting all my papers and fetching my pen. Mom and Dad died during a looting spree in Igros back in thirty-nine. It's common even now because all the useful Hokuten are at Bethla, and all the bad Hokuten...well, they're usually the ones doing the looting.
Daniel, my younger brother by about two years, joined this tiny group, the Knights of Death, because he felt that they had noble goals. We're from a merchant family, so I don't know why he joined them and their commoners deserve the same rights as the nobility' goals, but he did. He got killed at a skirmish about four years ago, the same time my other problem started, and I haven't really stopped to think about his death. I don't even know if he got to be buried next to our parents, or if they thought he was just some fool commoner and burned his body with the rest of them.
Although I have complete faith in God, I can't help wonder why He would let things like that happen to people who follow Him faithfully.
and he says it sincerely, but he's got both his parents still alive and Alia in Dorter...well, I can't take it any deeper than face value, when's she moving here?
She's supposed to be here already, but she still doesn't have clearance for Cherise yet, Cherise is her pet cockatoris. Alia used to be a monster tamer for the Touten before they decided to let her go for insubordination, but Sir Kadmus said two weeks ago that he cleared her, so I don't know what's going on.
Ryan groans and smacks his palm against his forehead. That damned bird's still freakin' alive?! I thought I killed that thing a year ago!
On his break last year, Ryan went to Dorter to stay with Alia. Cherise put Stone Feather' or whatever on him, and all the stores were closed for a couple days due to a freak snowstorm. He was a statue for three days, and he swore that he was going to carve up the bird and serve it for his own birthday one of these days. Yeah, like Alia would let him.
The people of Warjilis sure do talk funny down there. I'm going to buy you a dictionary one of these days, just so you know what a real' word is.
he stands up, I think I'll go out as a civilian for a while and grab an early supper. Tell Lia I said hi', okay?
I wave him away. Okay, anything interesting happen lately that I can tell Alia?
-----
Okay, so I totally didn't understand that, Ryan says while we head back to the barracks. Since it's Sunday, we had the one in the morning to seven in the morning shift, which is always good because I have time to wash up before going to church, so, if it turns out that the bard is the murderer, how can he be if he's seen with a harp?
Rei Tanaka, a Knight Blade from the Eastern Lands, often tells everybody these mysteries' with a hidden culprit. Seems like the answer for his latest one is that the bard did it, but that's a weird answer when the victim had stab wounds. Well, I guess he'd have to be equipped with a sword.
But he wasn't seen with a sword, he was seen with a harp.
Okay, fine. Maybe he carried a dagger on him.
But he wasn't seen with a dagger, he was seen with a harp, he sounds as frustrated as I feel.
Look, maybe he hid the dagger in his cape, or in his harp... I reach the door first, pushing it open slightly--
What's been bothering you lately?
Ryan and I look at each other. Who's Sir Chiroseau talking to this early in the morning?
You don't have to worry about me. I'm still productive, aren't I?
Sir Kadmus, huh? If it's a private conversation, that'd explain why we ran into a lot of the others while heading back up here.
It's not your productivity I'm worried about. As a friend, I've noticed that you were really distracted yesterday. Pause. And I'd think that you'd have been talking about the time you had with Miss Reis at the ball by now.
I'd rather not talk about that.
Why? Did something happen at the ball?
...Not exactly.
Did something happen after the ball? There's a long pause. I can see it on your face that something happened.
...I've heard these words before. That time...
I...I didn't think I was forcing her--
You didn't...Kadmus, what did you do?
I didn't think that I was doing anything wrong, the answer is terse. I wince at the words because
--I didn't think I was doing anything wrong, Sir Beoulve, I swear that!--
they're familiar.
That's not what I was asking. I thought you loved her--
How do you know that?
Because she told me. She told me how you told her your feelings, and how she felt as if she had to return them. She said that you deserved it the most...how can you manipulate a young woman's feelings like that?
I would never do that to Reis! I didn't know she felt as if she had to...had to do anything for my sake...I never knew that she thought that way...
What would you have done?
I would've talked to her. I would've told her that I don't mind if she can't tell me she loves me, that I love her regardless. And I would've told her that she doesn't need to comply to my wants just for my sake.
Kadmus...did you touch her?
I...I only did what I thought she wanted me to do.
I see.
What's that supposed to mean?
It means that I think I understand, but at the same time...Miss Reis is like a daughter to me. She's like Aimee to me. So, I believe what you're saying right now, but if Miss Reis should come to me and tell me otherwise, I won't hesitate to act.
You're a good knight, Chiroseau.
But not a good friend, right?
I think you make a better father than a friend. If you'll excuse me, I have work.
Don't you think that the best thing to do is to talk to Miss Reis and get everything cleared up?
There's the sound of footsteps going deeper into the building. She may not have loved me before, Sir Kadmus' voice is soft, but I think she definitely hates me now, there is the sound of a door closing, then the creaking of a bunk as weight settles on it.
Looking at Ryan, he seems frozen, his color paling considerably. And I...
--No, Sir Beoulve, I swear on the Holy Saint himself that I had no involvement whatsoever. I am a religious man, just like you. I have a girlfriend whom I love dearly. I have a family name that I want to honor--
What is this...
--I would never participate in any of the rapes that my superior committed--
-----
Wake up, Riola!
Groggily I open my eyes. Looks like it's morning... The hell? Something going on?
Yeah, meeting, that first voice speaks again...sounds like Rican Jossler...I never see him anymore, hurry up, before either of them come back!
Either of who? I move off my bunk and stand up, already seeing that the barracks is filled with knights. That's a weird thing cause most of us are usually out, even if we don't have a shift to work. But right now there's about fourteen of us crowding the interior of the building. What's going on? I ask, looking at everybody's grim, set faces. No Sir Kadmus or Sir Chiroseau though...
I told them what we heard yesterday, Sam, Ryan says somewhere to my left. Too many people in here to see him clearly, though, everybody who has their shift from seven to one has already been filled in too.
Yesterday...?
--I didn't think that I was doing anything wrong--
Oh. That. I see, my throat feels dry, so what about it?
We gotta do something about it, Jacob Yuil, a Dark Knight from Fovoham, speaks up. He shakes his head minutely, blond hair moving slightly, I mean, Sir Kadmus having problems is one thing, but if Sir Chiroseau thinks that Sir Kadmus is capable of doing...that...it could cause big problems to the Order if these bad feelings seep in any longer. I mean, they won't even talk to each other now.
Everybody, including me, nods at this. So, what can we do? Terrin Ewon, another Dark Knight and the resident jokester of the Knights, asks.
Well, if Mishima was still here, we could've done a two-pronged attack, Wylen Narro points out. Like Takeo, he's also a Holy Knight. He's got a point there: Takeo's girlfriend was a white mage, so she could've talked to Miss Dular or something.
As it is, we've only got one plan, and that's to get Sir Kadmus to talk to Miss Dular, our only White Knight, Ren Oyama, shrugs, and we can't bombard him or else it won't work, so only one of us can talk to him.
I'll agree to that. Fine, but who?
Someone who's calm, dependable, and knows a lot about dealing with women and...that sort of thing, Ryan starts, and everybody starts staring at me, Sam, you wanna do it?
Looking into everybody's eyes, from blue to green to brown and hazel, I feel a sudden sinking feeling in my stomach.
I don't really want to get involved, but for the sake of the Order...
I say quietly, I'll do it. Got a deadline for this?
But I don't want to do this. After four years...I don't want to dredge up all those old memories again, especially not when Alia's due to arrive soon.
For the both of us, that was the hardest time in our relationship. The charges, the stigma, and trying desperately to make her believe that I wasn't capable of those sort of things...
Oh, Holy Saint who resides in Heaven with thy Father, help me...
-----
Freshly dressed in civilian clothing, I walk out of the barracks, still thinking about what I should say to Sir Kadmus. It's only Monday night, half a day since I was elected' to talk to him, and all I've gotten so far is a headache.
I'll go to the church and pray for guidance. That always helps me...
Alia...? I turn around and there she is, long blond hair streaming down to her waist, large hazel eyes shining, looking so cute in a long blue dress with no sleeves. I smile when she runs up to me and hugs me. By the Holy Saint, Alia, it's been forever... wrapping my arms around her, I kiss the top of her head. Still as short as ever...
It's only been six months since I've last seen her, but...God, I really missed her.
Feels like it, huh? She pulls back slightly, grinning up at me. Actually, I finally got here a couple days ago and got all moved into that house you helped get, so... her eyes narrow slightly as her grin shifts into her normal smile, when are you gonna move in?
I blush. When we're married, sweetheart, as much as I love looking at her body, it'd be really disrespectful to both her and the tenets of the Church if I went any further.
I know that, she huffs, now looking annoyed, you don't have to say that like I don't have any morals or something. I meant, we're still getting married in December, right?
it's just better to hold it when Examiner Draclau comes back as a cardinal. Buremonda's the type that'll postpone the ceremony until then anyway, want to come to the church with me?
Shrugging, Alia moves out of our embrace and holds onto my right arm. Something troubling you, Sammy? You only go to church other than on Sunday when something's bothering you.
Damn, I don't really want to tell her, but... Yeah, actually, something is bothering me, she gives me a look of concern. God... it's nothing really big, just need to talk to Sir Kadmus since he seems to be having a problem.
'Sir Kadmus'...that's your commander, right? I shake my head.
That's Sir Chiroseau. Sir Kadmus is a ranked Holy Knight in charge of the entire Order, we start walking to the church, albeit very slowly, he's a good guy.
Alia doesn't say anything right after, which is never a good thing. Looking down at her, she seems to be kind of pensive. That's great that you have a good leader this time around. What kind of problem does he have?
Not too sure of that, myself. Seems like a problem with his girlfriend, Miss Dular, at Alia's questioning look, I hasten to explain, Reis Dular, a cataloger from Murond. Lionel laws make it so that they're technically not supposed to be together, but that never means anything.
Is that the problem? Sounds like they're doing a good job of circumventing that anyway, hazel eyes narrow as she looks up at me, what's with that look? He's not, like, cheating on her or anything, right? I know how you knights stick together on stuff like that.
I shake my head. God, I don't want to say this because it feels so wrong... It seems as if something happened between those two, and Sir Chiroseau thinks that it may be because... dammit, dammit, dammit, ah, Sir Kadmus may have wanted to do more than Miss Dular would've liked.
I don't believe it, but...
Sammy? Are you saying that... she's searching my face, her expression revealing that...she still remembers. God, I don't think either of us will ever forget, is he capable?
None of us believe it, but Ryan and I were listening in on Sir Kadmus and Sir Chiroseau, and it sounds like something definitely happened, although, I sigh, it's hard to tell exactly what it was.
Alia doesn't say anything else, and we walk the rest of the way to the church in silence. Once inside, we walk down the center of the nave, kneeling just before the pulpit. Facing us is a large stained-glass image of Saint Ajora, our Savior.
My family had always been fairly religious, so I remember Daniel and I having to recite the legend of Saint Ajora and the Zodiac Braves often during our youth. With these warriors from Heaven bearing stones engraved with the symbols of the zodiac, Saint Ajora smote the evil Lucavi who had taken over the king of Limberry and were planning to turn Ivalice into a new Hell. Although the Zodiac Braves dispersed after defeating the demons, it's said that their stones are scattered about Ivalice, and they will find their way into the hands of new heroes should the need ever arise.
Saint Ajora, Holy Son of our Heavenly Father, what should I do? What can I say to Sir Kadmus when all I have to go on is speculation from words that were supposed to be spoken in secret?
Everybody thinks I understand, but the truth is...I don't believe my situation applies here. At least, I hope not.
I hear Alia whisper next to me, and I slowly exhale through my nose at the sound of her voice. I might not be hearing it today...
I glance over at her. She has a rather determined look on her face, which I know means that she has an idea. Let's go, I mutter, standing up and giving her my hand. She takes it and stands, and we make our way out of the church, Alia, what's on your mind?
I'm going to help you, looking over at her, she seems very serious, you need my help, and I... she smiles sadly, I guess I feel a bit connected already just listening to the bare bones of it from you. Y'know what I mean?
I don't say anything to that. Silently, I walk her back to her new house.
I know exactly what she means.
-----
When I enter the barracks after walking Alia home, everyone crowds around me, desperately telling me the latest in Sir Kadmus' affairs.
We don't know what he was called in for, not really, Ren says, worry seeping out of his dark eyes, but you know how he usually jokes about how Priest Buremonda likes to lecture him because he figures Sir Kadmus is just some stupid knight? He didn't do that at all this time, he just stormed through the barracks and slammed the door to his office.
Ren Oyama is our sole White Knight for a reason. Honest, trustworthy and just an all-around nice guy, he was knighted to that rare class when he was just nineteen. He's twenty now, the youngest one here. I don't think the concepts of exaggeration' and hyperbole' even exist to him.
Of course, we're nowhere near as stupid as that priest thinks us to be. And for him to call in Sir Kadmus all of a sudden...it had to be about Miss Dular. Even if the two men are equals while Examiner Draclau's out of Lionel, Miss Dular's an employee under that priest.
Whatever Priest Buremonda said to Sir Kadmus to get him angry enough to start slamming things had to be about her.
I don't think I should talk to him today.
-----
I don't like having the seven at night to one in the morning shift on Tuesdays, or any day for that matter. It's usually better to have daytime shifts. The door to the barracks creaks now, and we've all been trained to be really light sleepers, so when it's opened in the middle of the night it pisses everybody off. Not to talk of the current heat wave that keeps us all awake, then just as everybody's sleeping that door creaks open...hn.
But it's not yet time for my shift to start. It just turned two a couple minutes ago, according to the church bells. I'm just lying on my bed, trying to get some sleep before patrol...
knoknok
Who is it? Ryan yells from his bunk above mine. I fight the urge to kick the bottom of his bed. Why can't he just climb down and answer the door like a normal person?
It's Alia, you pathetic would-be murderer! Open the door! Ah, that's the love of my life, using the same straightforwardness that got her kicked out of the Touten.
With an exaggerated huff, Ryan jumps down from his bunk and I watch as he goes over to the door. Lia, open your own damn doors, he growls as he yanks open the door, isn't that why you joined the Touten, so you can be a liberated, independent woman?
From my vantage point, lying on my bunk with no intent on getting up, I can see that Alia's holding a basket. Doesn't mean that I don't like having things done for me every once in awhile, this is spoken quietly, so I know that Ryan hit a sore spot, 'sides, I'm a civilian now, remember?
Yeah, sure, I know, Ryan closes the door behind Alia as she moves to the center of the room, nice to see you again, cuz.
You too, Ryan. Hey...Sammy, is that you? She walks over to me, sitting down on the edge of my bed before plopping her basket on my stomach. Damn, what did she put in there? Why didn't you greet me at the door?
I sit up, moving the basket on my lap as I move in to kiss her. Because Ryan got there first, moving away, I open the basket and peer inside. Hm, sandwiches. thanks for bringing some food, darling. We're poor enough as is.
It's edible, right? Cause you totally screwed up dinner when I was over at your old place, Lia, Ryan comments as he sits on the bunk opposite us. I pass Alia the basket after I take a sandwich. Hm, roast beef and lettuce.
Then it's a good thing I didn't have to feed your ungrateful body for three of those days, she takes a sandwich and hands the basket over to Ryan, then looks over at me, it's okay, right?
Why is she looking at me like that? Of course it is, and she smiles, no one can mess up something as easy as sandwiches, anyway, and she frowns. I know what that means, did I say something wrong?
Daintily, she bites into her sandwich before tossing me a look. You didn't say something right, that's for sure, she mutters. Ryan chortles and I glare at him.
Every time I see you two together, it reminds me why most knights choose quiet little white mages over knights and monks and stuff, he shoves some of his sandwich into his mouth, after all those years of fighting, who wants to go home and have to deal with some aggressive wife better suited for the battlefield?
Why, why did he have to say that? I take a bite out of my sandwich and start praying to God. Invisibility would be nice right no-- Are you serious? Hey Sammy, is that true? Alia turns to me, her eyes piercing and scary.
Gesturing that I need to swallow, I try to think of a good enough response. Well, it depends on the person, so, ah...
The door opens. Thank you, Almighty Lord in Heaven. Sir Kadmus walks in, heading towards his office with a rather blank look. Well damn, that's not going to be much of a distraction. Oh, excuse me! Alia says loudly.
What's she doing?
Sir Kadmus looks over at us, more of a reaction than out of any actual curiosity. His eyes widen and...is he looking at Alia or me? Something like realization crosses his face and his expression changes from near astonishment to...something blank, but sad too.
Why would he look at either of us like that?
My name's Alia Mikner. Ryan's my younger cousin and Sammy's my fiancé. You're Sir Kadmus, right? I just wanted to thank you for getting the paperwork done for the clearance of my Cherise so quickly, she pauses, um...you are Sir Kadmus, right?
Ah, yes, that's me. You're very welcome, he smiles slightly, forgive me, but I have some work to do.
Oh, of course! Thank you once again! Sir Kadmus nods and heads towards his office, although I don't hear his door close after he disappears into the hallway. That's probably a good sign, since that door's always been closed since Saturday. Hm...hey Sammy, her voice is lowered, which means she must've noticed the same thing I did, did you see how he was looking at me?
Oh, so he was looking at her. I see. Yeah, so?
Dude, why would he look at you? He's already got one of the best looking women in Lionel, Ryan says this in a normal tone. I look at him.
Is that a foreign word you just used, or something you made up? I'm willing to bet that it's the latter.
That's a normal word, Alia says, and I look at her skeptically, well, depending on where you are.
That is the only thing these two will ever agree on, ruining the language. Okay, sure. So, what were you going to say?
She tucks some of her hair behind her ear. Do I look anything like Reis?
...Well, you're both blond, and you both have light brownish eyes, though yours are more gold-green too, and Alia has a spattering of freckles across her cheeks, making her look younger than Miss Dular even though she's a year older than I am, do you mean to say that he mistook you for a moment?
Shrugging, she reaches for her basket, which is sitting next to Ryan. He seemed almost happy, then he turned sad. It makes me wonder...
Since Alia used to work with monsters on a daily basis, she thinks that she understands people a lot better. She believes that emotions are the same, whether it's from a monster or a human. I don't know about that, but there was something pretty odd about how Sir Kadmus reacted. I think you're right.
Hold on, hold on, Ryan gestures with a new sandwich, I can't sit by idly while you, he points the sandwich in my direction, go and agree that she, the sandwich is now aimed at Alia, is anywhere in the realm of Miss Reis' beauty.
I wasn't saying anything about that, Alia says quietly, taking a bite of her sandwich. Concerned, I glance at her, but she doesn't seem to notice.
He smirks. I finish off my sandwich, but I've lost my appetite. Good, because it's true, even if Miss Reis could stand to gain a few pounds up here, when he makes a certain gesture with both hands at his chest, I blush and try not to think about what he just implied, but she's so quiet and kind and complacent that any guy would be willing to overlook that.
After glancing at me, Alia smiles sweetly at her cousin. Oh, he's dead. Can you repeat what you just said? I didn't catch it.
Blissfully, he smiles. What? That I think that Miss Reis is kinda flat but she's still damn beautiful?
Yeah. That, she grins, tell me, is Sir Kadmus a vengeful kind of guy?
...Well, sometimes he gets exasperated if we bug him too much about Miss Reis... he looks over at me, then slowly realization dawns on his face, he didn't close his door this time, did he?
I shake my head numbly as I watch Sir Kadmus appear at the foot of the hallway to his office, looking extremely irritated. I've never seen him look like that before... Mikner, I'd like to see you in my office for a moment.
Yes, Sir Kadmus, Ryan glares at Alia as he stands up and follows Sir Kadmus into the office. I feel sorry for Ryan, but there are some things you just don't do.
Still... Don't you think you were going a little too far there? I ask Alia. She narrows her eyes, looking down at her lap.
The moron was asking for it, she mutters, and I don't exactly appreciate being compared to another woman like that.
Moving up next to her, I put my arm around her and she leans against my chest. That harsh look is still on her face, but I'll hold her until it goes away and she smiles again.
I'll gladly hold her beyond then.
Even considering Ryan's tasteless comments about Miss Dular, Sir Kadmus' reaction was nothing short of interesting. That's not the reaction of a man who would gravely disrespect a woman.
I've seen that reaction, that personality...and that's not it.
-----
Even before Takeo left, we've been understaffed. Regulations call for a minimum of six knights to patrol at any given time, or for each six-hour bloc of time. Since we're down to twenty-three knights, that means that someone has to work two shifts a day to make up for the deficiency. Now that someone is Ryan until the end of the month.
Today's the fourth.
I wouldn't appreciate someone talking about my fiancé while I'm in earshot in as crude a manner--at all, really--as Ryan did, but...that's going a little far. In Sir Kadmus' case, this far exceeds his normal reaction of smile politely and tell them that he won't stand for such talk.' Everybody's pushing me to talk to Sir Kadmus very soon because of this.
So Sammy, she works in the library? What does she do?
Alia thinks that the best way to get down to the bottom of this is to talk to Miss Dular. Or rather, she'll talk to Miss Dular. That's perfectly fine with me, although Alia's not the most sensitive person and I don't know Miss Dular enough to guess at what sort of reaction she'll have to my lovely fiancé. All I can do is pray, I suppose.
She's a cataloger, I think I've told her this before, but I hear she just translates ancient texts.
Couldn't she have stayed in Murond and done that? Alia asks. I shrug. I don't know why Priest Buremonda transferred her here just to translate. I mean, I'd think there was more of a need of that service at Murond, or Orbonne.
We walk past the first walls of the church, and I guide Alia to a door on the east side of the church. Opening it for her, I try to smile. Here's the library, Alia.
She smiles widely, then looks up into the skylight in the middle of the library. Abruptly she stops. Oh, wow, look at that hu-ge glass pane in the ceiling!
It's not just one pane, it's an entire skylight. It was here before I was, she's so cute when she smiles like that. Looking straight ahead, I see a figure sitting at a table in the center of the room, darkish golden hair spread over the back of the chair. Ah, that's Miss Dular.
Alia looks at me, eyes still full of wonderment. Wow, I didn't realize that Lionel was so well off compared to Dorter! I'm inclined to agree with her. I've been to Dorter many times, and as a trade city it's pretty nice, but it still doesn't compare to some of the things in Lionel. We completely enter the library and walk towards Miss Dular, who seems to be concentrating on her work.
Oh, Miss Dular, I say once we reach her table. She pauses, then looks up at us, large light brown eyes alight with just a glimmer of feeling. Her face is completely blank and it's...kind of like looking at Sir Kadmus.
Hm...
She parts her lips slightly.
As much as I love Alia, and even after all the things we've went through...those eyes, that velvety alto...I can understand why Ryan said what he said. But she's not nearly as lively as Alia. You may not remember me, but I greeted you at the castle, I smile, hoping she remembers me, my name's Samuel Riola, of the Lionel Holy Knights.
There's a flicker of recognition in her light eyes. Reis Dular, she bows slightly, and I belatedly remember something about how polite she's said to be, ...although you already know me... she hesitates, as if she wanted to say something else.
I'm here too, Alia pokes me and I flinch. What was that for? I'm Alia Mikner, this guy's-- she pokes me again and I grit my teeth, --fiancé. I just moved here from Dorter a day or so ago. He wanted to pick up a book, she leans in secretively towards Miss Dular, he's really religious.
While Alia isn't as religious as I am, she didn't have to point it out like that. You don't have to say that like it's a crime, I'm supposed to disappear so that she can properly' talk to Miss Dular, I'll be right back, I look at her and she returns it. Everything's going okay. I walk to the back of the room and look through all the titles. I can hear them, although not well enough to pick out anything. Holy Words: A Dissertation of Selected Sermons From Saint Ajora...this looks interesting. I pull it out of the bookcase and flip through it. It's fairly small as far as religious tomes go, which can only be a good thing. Hm, this is really detailed too. I'm really fond of reading this sort of literature, although with Alia around I probably won't get the chance to read as much as I usually do. It's a fair trade.
I don't hear them anymore...does this mean we can go? I walk back to the table, happy at my find. I found a book, Alia, wait, am I really allowed to take this? Miss Dular, I know you don't check out books or anything, but do you mind if I borrow this? She glances at the cover of the book when I show it to her, then nods. I heard she was quiet, but I hope that Alia didn't say anything that really got to her. Thank you, Miss Dular. Alia, shall we go?
Alia sounds happy as she stands up and grabs my hand, then she actually waves at Miss Dular. It was great meeting you, Reis! Let's talk again! Well, I guess it couldn't have gone that badly if Alia's willing to say that. We walk out of the library, with me pushing the door open for her, when she suddenly looks at me. It isn't as bad as you think it is. There's no way he did anything to her that she didn't want done.
That's great! How do you know that? I'm amazed...did Miss Dular open up to Alia in such a short amount of time?
Well, she was wearing a long-necked blouse, and she kept touching her neck, so I'd say that he left a mark on her, she nods to herself, she seemed really wistful, didn't say a lot, though that's probably just a personality trait...she doesn't act like a victim normally does.
I nod. So this is just a case of...what, then?
Pro'ly crappy communication skills, Alia drawls, Sammy, do all guys like that type of girl?
...That was sudden. Depends on the type of guy, I guess.
She stops, and I realize that we're heading towards the shopping area. Do you like that type of girl?
W-what? You're the type of girl that I like, I look into her eyes, brown and green with flecks of gold. I love her eyes, why do you ask?
Ryan said that knights prefer the quiet, complacent type of girl and... she sighs, being from Dorter and in the military...I've never seen that type of girl until today. There's no way I could ever be like that...
Would you want to be? I'd like to kick him right now. Alia's not the type to get depressed like this.
Alia looks at me strangely. Of course not. I'm just trying to figure out how a man could stand a woman like that. She's so amazingly beautiful and I'm sure she's extremely intelligent, but...is that it?
That's pretty rude, don't you think? Personally, I've seen Miss Dular with Sir Kadmus before, and I know that there's definitely something there. When she's with Sir Kadmus, she's certainly a lot happier.
...She feels different to me, I guess, smiling slightly now, Alia pulls me a bit, walk me home. Talk to Sir Kadmus tomorrow if you want, but trust me, it's not as bad as you knights think it is, a wistful sheen passes over her eyes for a second, he's definitely no Margueriff.
I wish she hadn't said his name. Even though I've put my heart into the Glabados faith and believe in forgiving all those that have sinned against me, I can't...
I can't ever forgive my former commander for what he's done.
-----
Okay, I'm going to do it, I announce to everyone in the barracks after I finish changing into civilian clothes. Something hits the back of my head and I turn and glare at the bunk above mine.
Shut up, I'm trying to sleep before my next shift, Ryan grumbles.
I say sincerely to him, and he just shakes his head and goes back to sleep. I should talk to Sir Kadmus about reversing Ryan's punishment too. Turning to everyone, I try to smile, wish me luck.
There's a chorus of sure' and just do your best' and such, and it's nice that everyone has such faith in me. I make my way to the hallway leading up to the door, steel my nerves, then knock. Come in, Sir Kadmus says on the other side. Hm, he doesn't sound like he's any worse off than usual.
I open the door and walk in. He's sitting at his desk, working on his paperwork with help from a lantern's light. Ah, I'd like to talk to you for a moment, sir.
He looks up at me. It's about eight at night, and even with the light his eyes are darkened to the point of looking black. he says wearily.
At the bar would be better, drinking is a good way of getting someone to talk, except that I don't drink very often. I don't have much in the way of savings since I was saving up to help buy Alia's--and my--future home, but I think I can spare some gil, I'll buy.
After staring at me curiously for a moment longer, he nods. Let me get changed first, I shrug at this and walk out of his office. I think I'll go outside...fresh air always helps me think. I walk past everyone, who all seem appropriately stunned at seeing Sir Kadmus leave his office, and I slip out into the night. Hm, new moon. So if we stumble back here stone-blind drunk, there won't be any light to depend on and we could easily end up in front of the church. I'm sure that priest will appreciate that.
Okay, let's go, he says, stepping out of the barracks. In silence we walk over to the bar, located along the shopping area near the south entrance to town. It's fairly crowded inside, filled with rowdy drunks and morose drunks. No happy drunks, at least not yet. We take a table somewhere in the center of the bar and a hardened-looking waitress comes up to our table.
What shall be my poison for tonight? Gallionne lager, nothing like home brew.
Same for me, he says, and I inwardly sigh in relief. If he chose something harder, it probably wouldn't be a very good sign of how the talk's going to go. I think the one thing any knight learns along the way is how to drink, sometimes for the respect, sometimes to forget.
Mostly the latter.
The waitress leaves, then comes back with amazing speed with two mugs filled to the brim with the dark brew. I take a sip, relishing the smoothness. Did you want to talk to me because of Mikner? He asks after taking a gulp of his drink.
I pause, it's about you, actually.
He looks at me, not looking particularly annoyed or anything. Because of the way I've been for the last week or so, right?
That's...direct.
I see, he takes another drink, looking like he's thinking over something, how long have you been with Miss Mikner?
Eh... Over four years, I say, taking a sip.
That must be nice, I restrain myself from telling him that a lot of that time wasn't actually spend on the courtship process, but rather the rebuilding the relationship' process, I thought about it yesterday, and I realized that I've known Reis for about four months, he takes another gulp of the liquor, I've told her about my past, and my feelings for her, and...well, he pauses to down some more of the lager, she's never told me the same things.
Was Alia right about the crappy communication'? Does that bother you? after taking another sip, I've noticed that he's drinking rather quickly. I'm not sure what to make of that.
Sir Kadmus pauses from taking another drink, looking thoughtful. No, not really. She's... he puts down the mug, she's so different that I don't know what to think.
I don't understand, I take a gulp. Judging how Sir Kadmus looks, which is more like his old self except for the faint splotches of red on his cheeks, he's going to talk a lot. That's better than how he had looked when I walked into his office earlier.
She confuses me, he smiles lightly, I'm probably the closest person to her, but I can't even begin to figure out what's going on through her head. All the women I've ever met in my life are so obviously strong-willed. They'll say what they want, they'll do what they want... his eyes take on a faraway look while he takes another sip of his drink, but she's so quiet and kind and polite...and it's strange. She's all these things, but... frowning slightly, he looks down into his drink, she can wield all that like they were weapons.
That's...that's an odd description. Does that bother you?
He looks up at me. No, that attracts me, this is said so bluntly that I raise an eyebrow, but I don't understand her. She seemed so accommodating at first, but she's really very strong. I'm always left wondering, why does she even want to be with me?'
But I don't think she trusts me.
She told you this? The change in his tone...first he was happy, then suddenly everything changed. It's intriguing how such a complacent woman has such an effect on him.
It makes me wonder what sort of effect Alia's had on me.
She doesn't need to tell me, he sighs, she won't tell me anything about her past except for small details. I tell her, If there's anything bothering you, please tell me,' and she smiles and doesn't say anything. I'm afraid that if I push her into telling me anything, she'll just close up, he takes a gulp of his lager.
Unlike Ryan and Alia, who are very adept at talking about whatever crosses their mind for very long periods of time, Sir Kadmus is normally talkative but discreet. He'll be more than happy to talk about Reis, but nothing like this. Nothing deep. Is it because of the alcohol, or because he's held this in for a long time? Do you trust her? I ask quietly.
He looks at me, a small smile on his face.
If he can smile and say that, then I don't think that Miss Dular's taciturn nature is getting to him that much. I know he's normally extremely easygoing, but even so...I take a sip and mull over what I should say next.
I just wanted to give her a goodnight kiss, I freeze when I realize what he's talking about. I don't know if I want to hear this... and I wanted to tell her how I had fun even though we can't dance and there was an episode with this kid from Goug that interrupted our time. Then I was going to go back to the barracks and sleep in peace for once, since everybody was still out patrolling. That would've been a perfectly acceptable end to the night.
The next thing I know, she's moaning my name in my ear and I'm kissing her again and thinking that there's another way to end the night, and it was starting to look more and more acceptable all the time, he pauses to drain down the rest of his mug, frowning at the same time, we were outside her room, of all places, and it never occurred to me that one of the white mages could've walked outside and seen us like that. It never occurred to me that when she starts undoing things like the front of her dress, that might be the time to stop and assess the situation, his eyes narrow.
Then I told her I loved her and she pushed me away.
Without a word, the waitress from before deposits a new glass in front of Sir Kadmus, taking the empty one away. My glass is still half-full, and with everything he's telling me...it's hard to just drink casually. Was that the first time you told her that you loved her?
He glances at me. No. Sometimes I'd tell her, and she'd try to say it back, but... he takes a sip out of his new glass, it was obvious she couldn't. The best I got was that she really, really, really liked' me. That's fine. As long as she was willing to stay around me, that was good enough, he frowns, she stared at me as if I was forcing her to...I can't even bring myself to make her talk to me, and she thinks I was going to... closing his eyes, he leans back and sighs, after that, I just needed to get away and think for a while. Then Chiroseau tells me that she was worried about my feelings, that she believed that she had to return my love...
All I feel is incredibly guilty now.
...My God. This is...what do I say? Ah...when I visited Alia after I left the Hokuten, a kindness bestowed by Sir Zalbag Beoulve, we just talked about everything. Have you tried to talk to her since? I'm sure the answer is no, at least up to yesterday.
Sir Kadmus looks at me, his eyes remarkably steady even with his new blotchy-red complexion. I know I should. I've wanted to all week. But...
Talk to her, I insist, reaching for my mug, talking to me won't do any good other than to let me know that you're feeling horrible about it, and I don't really matter in the scheme of things.
Everybody matters, he mutters, taking a sip of his drink, I wonder if she hates me?
You won't know until you talk to her, I sigh. I can repeat this as long as he keeps balking at the concept of communication.
Glancing at me, he smiles slightly. Everybody must've been worried if they felt that you should talk to me, Riola. You've always been good at things like that.
I shake my head. Anybody can listen, I think. We take care of our own. After all, there's a lot of people depending on us, and especially on you.
We sit there for a long time, quietly drinking and listening to the other patrons laugh and argue with each other. He seems to have regained his normal mood. I don't think it was because of my advice, but I guess he just needed to talk.
I hope that everything turns out all right for Sir Kadmus and Miss Dular.
-----
So, it really was just a communication problem? Alia smiles as she serves breakfast to Ryan and me at her' house. It's a nice Saturday morning, already pretty hot, but that's typical Lionel summer weather. I'm proud of you, Sammy, she kisses me on the cheek as she places a plate in front of me. Looking down at it, it seems to be eggs and bread...the eggs are runny.
Yeah, thanks Sam. At least Sir Kadmus put me back on normal scheduling, and he and Sir Chiroseau are talking again, Ryan pokes at his own eggs with his fork, Lia, you're supposed to cook the eggs longer.
Alia, who was sitting down at the table with her own plate, glares at Ryan. How cute. You know how to cook. Now, why don't you go find a husband so you can cook for him?
Before Ryan has a chance to open his mouth, I should stop this. Can you two not do this so early in the day? Stabbing at the eggs, I take in a forkful of it...eh. It's edible. I'm just happy that everything's back to normal. Good job with the food, sweetheart.
Thank you! She smiles cutely at me. We all start eating in silence, a small miracle occurring when Ryan actually doesn't complain about the food for complaining's sake. Cherise, who has free rein of the house, comes up to me and pecks at me until I give her some bread, then leaves the room. That bird only likes pecking me, I swear. Tearing some of her bread, Alia seems sort of hesitant. So, do you know if Sir Kadmus patched things up with Reis?
Ryan sighs. He probably did. He got in at ten last night, but he left at six or so. And here I was hoping I could just kinda sweep in and seduce her or something, his eyes take on a faraway look, and I hear Alia sigh in irritation.
I think you'd have to get in line for that, I take a bite of the bread, besides, what makes you think that she'd be interested in you?
The fact that I care, he says, spreading jam onto his bread, I mean, I respect Sir Kadmus and everything, but he was just totally handling everything wrong.
I look at him strangely. What makes you say that?
Like, I mean, he leans back, scratching his blond hair, just sitting around and thinking, oh, I'll wait for her to tell me things,' is so non-caring. If it were me, I'd ask her what was wrong when I notice, not just give her space' or whatever.
Alia raises an eyebrow. This from the man who commented on her chest size half a week ago?
He grins. My love is such that I can see her imperfections and still care anyway.
Oh, whatever, setting down her fork, she glowers at Ryan, I talked to Reis. That direct manner wouldn't help at all with a person like that. Sir Kadmus was only thinking of her by deciding to wait her out. She's the one who won't talk, so I think she's the one who's at fault.
Frowning at this, Ryan glances at me. What do you think, Sam? Who's the one in the wrong?
I look down at my cleared plate. In the wrong'...I wonder. Both of them, I guess. But...does it really matter, as long as they learn from their mistakes?
There are some things that will always be wrong, and some things that will always be right. But when it comes to relationships...I look over at Alia, and I remember all the things we had to go through to get to this point of eating breakfast together months before our wedding. Noticing my gaze, she smiles at me.
Even with everything that happened, if she can still smile at me like that, then the Holy Father and His Son haven't forsaken us just yet.
It's inevitable that incompatibilities and hardships are going to come up in a relationship, but as long as both people are happy in the end...it's worth it.
-End to Interlude #1-
I didn't really understand the concept of an interlude' until I read toastyann's RK fic, The Journey'. Since I really wanted to get in-depth about the situation in chapters 16-17 from a rather neutral viewpoint, this seemed like the best idea. So, thank you toastyann!- Margueriff' is Gustave Margueriff, that guy that who took Marquis Elmdor hostage and met his end by Wiegraf's blade. In his brave story, it says that he used to be in the Hokuten until they kicked him out for repeated robberies and rapes.
-It's intentionally vague because of importance constraints, but here's Sam's situation: He was in Margueriff's troop when they were both in the Hokuten, completely oblivious to the fact that his commander and a few other members were systematically robbing and raping throughout captured towns. Zalbag, who was just a superior commander at this time--I have no clue what that would translate into for today's military--tried the entire troop once word got out about the corrupt troop'. Sam was lucky enough that his innocence was recognized, but it really strained his relationship with Alia even up into his joining the Lionel Holy Knights. But no one cares, right?
-I feel that I've neglected the fact that a fair amount of Ivalice believes in the Glabados faith. Here's my nod to them. I'm not good with religion, so I always tend to forget the religious aspect of this story.
Reviews!
Hey, Luna. Maybe I'm just weird, but I think it's pretty sad that Reis isn't expected to talk about the most important things. It's like saying that people have just given up on her. Eh. -- I wonder if Verden really does seem subtly-evil...
FFVI is a great game, isn't it? It was the third RPG I'd ever played, eight years ago...oh, I feel old. Mog is just so cuddly-cute
Well, if you say so about the Delita-fic. Can't blame you for not wanting to get into his head, but as for doing him justice...you won't know until you try, I think.
Kay Willow, what a lovely review! I love having a lot to read. That chapter was really...I don't want to say hard', but it was definitely interesting, especially since I was changing around major events hours before I was supposed to post it up. And yeah, Setzer's awesome. Have you ever read Wine, Women and Song'?
Yeah, I'm not terribly worried about Reis being cliche. As long as she's developed from whatever archetype I've pulled her personality type from--incidently the same one as my favorite character from FFVI, Terra--I'm more than happy. And as for Beowulf...I didn't mean to imply that men can't be sensitive'. ;; I know way too many guys who're kinder than I ever could be. It's just because I'm a girl that I'm not quite sure of the mindset of a guy. ;
Yeah, having all these blond kunoichi and oracles and such...I always love how many FF games will be mostly set in some archtypical medieval/Western world...except for that one town with all the samurai and ninjas. Kinda gets one wondering...
Hello once again, Jaded Soul! Wow...you really are learned in Japanese. I know what you mean about having manga and import game books around. I'm happy that you haven't spotted any errors or typos so far, it's nice to know that I don't need a beta reader just quite yet. I hope that this long interlude is up to your standards of quality!
Josh, it really makes me happy that you're a dedicated reviewer, and I hope that I can continue to keep you waiting for each chapter. Well, about writing and reader's expectations...while I do care about reaching my readers' standards, I'm more concerned about improving for my own sake. But absolutely I'll do my best, and I thank you for appreciating that.
Thank you for reading! If you have any questions or comments please tell me, because I need something to think about other than completely reforming California's constitution and the effect stepchildren have on a second/third/nth marriage...
Chapter 18: Magic Touch (Chantage Redux): Well, if you like I'll teach you some magic, but I really don't mind eating sandwiches.