Swabbies
by Chou

Disclaimer: Oda-sensei owns One Piece. Like you haven't heard this a million times from me before. Anyway, Swabbies is my name for short, short OP fics, hopefully humorous, occasionally dripping innuendo like a sweet honey.

Episode 1 – Sanji, Can You Spare a Screw?

"Hey, Sanji. Gimme a screw." Usopp said causally to the chef without looking up.

"Eh? Do it yourself, long nose." Sanji didn't move from where he was leaning against the wall.

"Hey! I can't work on this unless you give me a screw, and if I can't work, the ship's in big trouble!" Usopp returned indignantly.

Sanji, with deliberate nonchalance, tapped some ash off of his bent cigarette and made no other movements. Usopp glanced the chef, shrugged, and moved his hand with a jerk. A steady stream of wetness hit Sanji in the face.

"Oi! Oi! You're dead, you…you shit…gah, long nosed…gah!" Sanji sputtered. Usopp calmly moved his hand and the stream stopped.

"Want some more, you lazy chef, or is it a blast in the face again?" Usopp said haughtily.

Sanji growled, stalked over to Usopp's toolbox, and pulled out a screw.

"Fine! Here's your damn screw!" he shouted and stomped off to change into dry clothes.

Usopp grinned and went back to repairing the hole in the hull.