Yay, 10th fic, 2nd songfic =D Every once in a while I got reviews from my other songfic, Tourniquet (shameless plugger D), saying I should make another one of Rath and Cesia =O Well after much deliberation (well, it's been a year almost.) and after just listening to random songs (I already do that…) and after saying "THIS COULD MAKE A GOOD SONGFIC" to a lot of the, I finally decided to just do this one =D And probably do another one later xD;; Plus I wanted a tenth fic…the 9 was just bugging me…- So here it is =D From that Batman movie which I cannot remember but had Dr. Freeze and Ivy in it (I think), the song "Frozen", by Madonna! …Yes…Madonna…hey it's a cool song, I like it o.O LISTEN TO IT O EVEN IF IT'S BY MADONNA OO JUST COS IT'S FROM A SINGER YOU MAY NOT LIKE DOES NOT MEAN EVERY SONG IS BAD OOO Plus it was from the old Madonna…I…think…?
Oh yeah, this is also a continuation from my previous songfic o.o Same format, too. First an intro paragraph sort of thing, then the lyrics come before it's corresponding section. …Understand? Too bad if you don't . ;;
Oh, DISCLAIMER: I owe, er I mean own . , nuthin o.O Not even this laptop --;; I'm doing this on vacation OO …I tend to do that a lot…o.o; I should take more vacations xD
Well you know what I'm going to say, READ ON!
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Cesia sat in the chair next to Rath's bed, staring at his silent figure lying motionless in the bed, only his eyes open. He had been like that ever since his suicide attempt just three days ago. It was raining. She looked out the window into the dismal gray skies, noting how the weather seemed to fit her mood. The rain, her sadness. The thunder, her anger. The lightning, her frustration. No matter how many times she tried, Rath seemed to rebuke her every effort to keep her promise. She turned back to Rath and slowly leaned over to run her hand through his bangs.
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You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
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Rath stared up at the ceiling, his dark crimson eyes blank as his mind continued to reel in anger and frustration at the Dragon's, especially at Cesia's, interference. Did they enjoy seeing him in mental torture like this, knowing that he was really faking the smiles and laughter? He had thought that maybe Thatz and Rune, even Cesia, would have seen through it all.
But no, they were all the same.
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You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken
When your heart's not open
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Deeper and deeper his soul continued to let the darkness swallow his whole being. Repeatedly he wished he had woken up to reality sooner, before Kharl had done that for him. Maybe if he had been stronger he would not have had to endure such pain the youkai had inflicted upon him. If only Kai-stern had not saved him. At least then he would not be this…monster.
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Mmmmmm, if I could melt your heart
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Lightning flashed. Cesia stared helplessly into Rath's torment filled eyes, wishing she could do something. She gently shook him. "Rath…Rath please wake up…"
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, we'd never be apart
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Rath's eyes flickered and his head moved slightly toward Cesia's face, glaring at her.
"What do you want?"
His voice was hoarse. Groggy.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, give yourself to me
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Cesia looked at him pleadingly.
"Rath, you don't have to suffer like this, I can help you…"
He just looked away.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, you hold the key
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"YOU SELFISH JERK!"
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Now there's no point in placing the blame
And you should know I suffer the same
If I lose you
My heart will be broken
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Tears welled up in Cesia's eyes as she roughly grabbed his shirt and shook him, surprising Rath. He had expected to see anger in her face, but instead he found something that startled him, almost frightened him. There was pain in her eyes.
This surprised and slightly troubled him. Why should she have that look of pain her? What was she suffering from? Was it him? Was he causing her grief and pain?
But why?
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Love is a bird, she needs to fly
Let all the hurt inside of you die
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
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"You IDIOT! Do you know how much we worry about you?!" The emotions that had been welled up in Cesia's heart had found the opening and began to pour out. "Why does it have to be death?! Why can't you try enjoying life?!"
Quickly Rath's hatred and anger returned.
"I'm a DEMON, Cesia! I don't belong here! The Dragons are only using me, they want nothing to do with me otherwise! I'm a tool, don't you understand that?! How could I enjoy a life in this body?? No one will ever understand the pain I go through and no one cares about any of that! I'm a monster, a freak! The only way for me is to die!"
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, if I could melt your heart
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There was a loud slap and Rath sat there, his hand slowly reaching up to where Cesia had hit him.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, we'd never be apart
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Cesia stood there, her still raised hand shaking slightly as she took deep breaths. She had had enough.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, give yourself to me
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"I will not let you die Rath." She was slightly surprised to hear her voice quiver, but she continued to speak. "I made a promise."
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, you hold the key
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He only stared back in shocked silence. She could see that she had his attention now and aimed to keep it.
She slowly shook her head as she smiled away the harsh insults she had been ready to throw at him. Instead she spoke in a hushed, gentle voice.
"Rath, I don't know what you've been through. You keep yourself in such a strong shell that I could never see you. The only thing I know for sure is that you want to die. But Rath, death is neither and answer nor an escape. Instead, your soul will continue to be tormented by the pain and the anger you feel now. They will continue to haunt you." She took a breath. "You keep saying that you are a tool to the Dragons, but you really aren't, Rath. You're more than that. You're part of a family. A large family. Everyone is looking out for you. Not to make sure that you come back in one piece so as to use you. They truly care about you Rath. Thatz and Rune care about you. …I care about you. You must break yourself from your nightmare, Rath. We need you. Not to use you, but just to have you as you. No matter what you were or are, we will accept you. The true you."
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You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
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Rath stared down in confusion. What were these myriad of emotions overwhelming his body? All this time his vision had been clouded by his own despair and frustration, seeking only to kill youkai as well as a way to his own death. Those were the only things he ever really saw.
Death.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, if I could melt your heart
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With a soft smile, Cesia gently placed a hand on his arm. "Rath, I am here…
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, we'd never be apart
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If you ever feel that you are alone, just remember that I will always be with you."
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, give yourself to me
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She cupped his face into her hands and wiped the stray tear that had slipped from his eye.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, you hold the key
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"You're stronger than this…I know it."
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, if I could melt your heart
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Rath now stared at Cesia in a new light. He could now see the true meaning behind the look of worry in her eyes.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, we'd never be apart
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How could he have been so blind as to not realize the light had been standing right in front of him this whole time?
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, give yourself to me
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Cesia leaned over to him, her face merely inches away from his.
"Rath."
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xMmmmmm, you hold the key
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"I will always be your support…but you have to fight the inner demon yourself."
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If I could melt your heart...
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Rath looked up and stared into Cesia's eyes, searching for the truth he wished to see. But he could only see one thing reflecting in her eyes: Himself. Suddenly the darkness started to dissipate, if slowly. His body seemed to grow lighter and his breathing became easier. It was then when he noticed Cesia getting up and without even thinking he quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her into him, hugging her tightly.
Her facing heating up like wildfire, Cesia glanced at him. "Uh…Rath…"
He only tightened the embrace. "I just want to be like this…for just a little longer…Because when I'm with you…I feel a little better…"
Feeling the rush of nervousness slowly disappear, Cesia mumbled her assent and let her body relax a little. Slowly, she could feel Rath's heart start to break the dark shell that had threatened to engulf him and smiled.
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Um…boo? Talk about mush O.o;; Okay, this was written a little weirdly…me breaking up the chorus part like that. More work for me -;; Also had me write more cos I made the song longer that way -;;; Like my last one, I say this one rather stunk - ;;; Probably even more - ;;;;; Even with so many revisions x.x;; Oh well! R&R.