Chapter 3: In Which Sirius Behaves Oddly - in More Ways than One

A/N: I owe most of this chapter to "Shoot the Moon" by AriaStar, which is one of my favorite Marauders stories ever. This chapter probably resembles that story more than I intended it to. Believe me, I wasn't attempting copywright infringement, and I didn't even have the story available when I wrote this (I was in a bloody campground, for God's sake). I've simply read it so many times that it's sunk into my head to the point where I get it mixed up with Canon. So no flames on that point, please.

Disclaimer: If I was JKR, I would be richer, prettier, older, and more brilliant. But I'm not any of those things, and, as such, I don't own the Harry Potter series. Oh well. I'll try again in another life...

Sirius' brain was racing so fast he could barely keep up with it. A vague thought was forming in his mind, and it had been becoming clearer and clearer for the last week. He had been dropping casual hints for some time now, and Peter and James were totally oblivious, but he had been able to catch the fear in Remus' eyes.

He had been observing Remus carefully ever since the end of last year. He had noticed how sick he looked every month. He had noticed every little distraction he used to blindside Sirius' direct questions. His eyes caught how Remus froze when he asked him if he was bitter about werewolves. He noticed when Remus came right out of his sleepy haze when he had been called "moon-boy." Remus always relaxed when he thought Sirius didn't see, but he did see, and he had been taking careful note of everything.

Little things that had bothered him for months were starting to come together, like pieces of some mysterious puzzle. Remus had looked positively sickened during the lesson about werewolves. He had written his entire essay without taking any notes or looking in any books. Sirius had caught the smile on his face when they were talking about werewolf rights. He had heard the passion and bitterness in his voice when he talked about people who became werewolves on purpose.

It was impossible. It was improbable. And he was afraid it was true.

He just needed to check a few facts, which was why he was currently sprinting towards the Astronomy Tower. A few of the teachers looked strangely at him, but he was halfway up the stairs before any of them could open their mouths.

Professor Sinistra seemed to be missing from her room, but the door was unlocked, and he quietly let himself in and began looking through papers.

"C'mon, c'mon, I know I saw 'em last week in class...I know they're here somewhere...c'mon...aha! Moon charts! Victory!"

Sirius grabbed the charts and spread them out on the table. Immediately, his mouth sank into his stomach. "No...no..."

The last full moon had been at the beginning of September. Remus had been in the Hospital Wing that day. The one in October had been a this week. They had been doing homework about Grindylows and scaring Peter about werewolves...it had been a full moon that night! Sirius remembered thinking he had heard a howl. He was fairly sure it was his imagination, but still...

Sirius flipped through the charts. And before that...before that...in August they had tried to set a date to go to Diagon Alley and the date he had suggested Remus had said he couldn't come...it had been a full moon. In July...Remus hadn't answered his letter until four days after he got it, which never happened...Sirius checked the date. It had been a full moon. In June...June...finals week, Remus had looked sick and had almost fallen asleep during the History of Magic final. They had put it down to staying up too late studying, but...it had been a full moon.

And it had been like that every other month of the year. Remus would be sick a couple days, miss one night, and then look sick for the rest of the week.

Sirius swore under his breath and leaned back in his chair to think. It had been one thing to talk gaily about werewolf rights and forming a committee to change the world, but an actual werewolf in their presence was another thing entirely. He wasn't sure what to think. Years and years of being told that werewolves were evil Dark Creatures didn't go entirely unnoticed.

But it was Remus. Remus was the farthest thing from a Dark Creature he had ever met. Remus wasn't the kind of psychotic fanatic that would go around biting people on purpose. Remus was kind and smart and quiet. He was sure that if Remus was a werewolf, he would do everything he possibly could to prevent himself from biting anybody. Remus would probably go insane with guilt if he ever did bite someone by accident. And the look in his eyes when they had talked about people who became werewolves on purpose...

Sirius brought the chair legs down with a bang. He had made up his mind. He wasn't going to let Remus suffer like that, and by God, if he could find a way to help him, he would. No matter how dangerous it was.

With that thought in his mind, he pulled a piece of parchment and a quill out of the book he was still carrying and began scratching down the dates of the full moons starting from last June - partly because he wanted evidence for James and Peter, and partly because he wanted a reference so that he could keep track of the full moon for the rest of the school year.

Then he quietly gathered up the moon charts, put them back where he found them, and snuck out of the Astronomy Tower, thanking all his lucky stars that Professor Sinistra hadn't walked in on him.

"Where's Remus?"

"Upstairs, asleep. Why?" James asked, looking at Sirius with a puzzled expression.

"There's something I want to ask him." Sirius started for the stairs.

"Sirius, your homework still isn't finished! You've been reading that werewolf book all night, you're going to be in trouble tomorrow!" James admonished.

"This is more important."

"You have a twisted idea of what's important," Peter pointed out, "You're not going to hex Snape's underwear again, are you?"

Sirius gave him a pained look. "Of course I'm not going to hex Snape's underwear, Peter! We never do the same prank twice. It's something else." And with that, he sprinted up the stairs two at a time.

"There's something funny about him..." James said unnecessarily.

Sirius had run up the stairs, but when he reached their dorm, he stopped with his hand an inch away from the doorknob. He realized that he hadn't thought this out at all, and he didn't know what on earth he was going to say. How did one admit to their best friend that they knew he was a werewolf? "Hi, Remus, felt like howling at the moon lately? When was the last time you grew fangs and wanted to bite somebody?" Sirius winced as he pictured the expression on Remus' face. It wasn't a happy one.

He sighed and sank down to the floor, leaning his back against the wall. He would have to find some way of presenting the information in a roundabout fashion, some way to skirt the facts until absolutely necessary, the same technique Remus used to avoid the subject...

Sirius sat up straight as something clicked on inside his head. That was perfect. He stood up again, took a deep breath, and opened the door to the dormitory.

Remus wasn't asleep. He was sitting next to the window, looking out at the grounds.

"Hi, Remus," said Sirius, announcing his presence.

Remus turned around. "Hi, Sirius. What's going on?"

Sirius grinned lopsidedly. "Well, I was thinking." He held up the book he had been reading and showed it to Remus. He wouldn't even have seen the fleeting expression that crossed his friend's face if he hadn't been looking for it. "Y'see, this book has all these neat things about werewolves. Y'know how we were talking about forming a werewolf rights committee?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I know James says it wouldn't work, but I want to try anyway."

"Why do you want to do something like that?"

"Well, it's a long story, d'you want to hear it?"

Remus had a guarded expression on his face now. Sirius hadn't realized til now what he was guarding. "Go ahead," he said.

Sirius grinned. "Well, I really like this subject, you know. I was reading in this book and it was talking about werewolves that have been bitten by accident - y'know, what they're like during most of the month."

"And?"

"It said that a lot of them feel very guilty about their lycanthropy - that is an awesome word - and they try to make up for it by being really good people the rest of the time."

"It said that?" Remus looked mildy interested, but Sirius was willing to bet that his interest was more than just mild.

"Yeah, isn't that great? It's a lot nicer than 'werewolves are evil, let's fill all of them with silver,' isn't it? And then I was reading more, and I started thinking."

"There's a change."

"Ha ha." Sirius pulled out his list of dates, and he could have sworn Remus' face froze when he saw them. "Look at this..." and he started explaining about the moon charts, the books, everything. Remus' expression got more and more blank and guarded, as he listened politely to what Sirius had to say.

"So...what's the point?" He asked when Sirius had finished.

Sirius grinned broadly at him. "I think you're a werewolf."

Remus stared at him. "Why are you smiling!"

"Are you kidding? It's cool! You're the nicest person I've ever met, I would never guess that you had such a dark secret. And Dumbledore must think it's safe, right? Or he wouldn't have let you come here."

"True...but Dumbledore's not an average wizard."

"Yes, but that's what makes people trust him. And anyway, you heard us all talking about werewolf rights. Remus, I understand why you were afraid to tell us, but I'm not going to stop being your friend. I want to help you!"

"What?"

"I want to help you! I know I can't cure your lycanthropy, but I'm going to find a way to help make it easier, okay?"

"You're nuts."

"Yeah, probably."

"No, really, I mean it. There's not much you can do to help a werewolf."

The haunted look in Remus' eyes scared Sirius, and he was more glad than ever that he had decided to accept Remus. He sat down on the floor, and Remus slid down from the window sill to sit next to him. "Well, Dumbledore must have done something for you," Sirius said at last, "What did he do?"

Remus hesitated. "Well...you know the Shrieking Shack?"

"Where all the ghosts are?"

"There are no ghosts."

"What?"

Remus sighed. "They built it so that I would have somewhere to go when I transform. They dug a secret passage between here and the school, and they planted the Whomping Willow over the entrance to the passage."

"But how do you get in?" Asked Sirius, who was completely fascinated.

"There's a knot that you can press that will make the Willow stop moving and open the passage. Madam Pomfrey takes me down there once a month and lets me in, and then comes to get me the next morning."

"That is so cool!"

Remus laughed. "I'm glad you think so."

"But where does the thing about the ghosts come from?"

Remus looked down. "It's me. The shrieking they hear is me."

They were both silent as Sirius digested this. Remus stared at his hands, afraid that when he looked up he would see pity in Sirius' face, and that was the last thing he wanted from Sirius.

"I'm going to do something about it."

Remus looked up, surprised. Sirius was not taking pity on him at all, but there was a muscle tightened in his face that Remus had never seen before. "What?"

"I'm going to do something. I'm going to help you. What kind of friend would I be if I sat here every night imagining you screaming and tearing yourself apart and not even lifting a finger to help? I'm going to help."

"There's nothing you can do for me."

Remus thought later that he should have known better than to tell Sirius Black there was nothing he could do. Sirius just shook his head. "I'm going to do something. You'll see. I just have to do some more research..."

"If you say so," shrugged Remus.

"Are you going to tell Peter and James?"

"What?"

"Remus, you have to tell them. You know they think the same as me."

"Sirius..."

"C'mon, Remus, they're my best friends. There's no way I can keep a secret like this from them, you may be used to it, but I'm terrible. We're going to have to tell them.

"Yeah...I guess they'd figure it out eventually."

Sirius smiled sympathetically. "I'll tell them for you if you like."

"Really?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'll do it right now! Here, wait here."

"Sirius! Wait! SIRIUS!" But it was too late. Sirius had already gone running down the stairs, yelling "James! Peter! There's something I have to tell you!"

Remus groaned and sank back against the wall, not sure how much of this he could take tonight, or how long he wanted to wait to find out what they thought.

It seemed to take days before James and Peter came thundering up the stairs. When he heard their footsteps, Remus could have sworn his heart stopped. This was it. It was time to face the music...vaguely he wondered if he should start packing his stuff, because if they told anybody it would be the end of his time at Hogwarts.

The door opened and James and Peter stood there looking at him for what felt like an eternity. Was that fear in their faces? Remus' heart had started again, but now it was thumping like it was trying to get out of his chest.

"So," said James finally, "We going to start that Werewolf Rights Committee?"

Remus stared at him in shock, refusing to believe it. They didn't really want to help him, did they? But James was giving him a lopsided smile, and Peter was beaming at him, and he couldn't help it. He grinned. "All right, but I'm not your mascot."

The room rang with their laughter, and if anyone asked why there was water coming out of his eyes, he would just say he was laughing too hard. Over James' head, Remus could see Sirius beaming at him. A strange feeling rose in his chest, and something else slowly started to ebb away. For the first time since he was four years old, he felt accepted. Maybe even...liked. And even better, for some reason, he wasn't afraid.