Disclaimer – still not mine. Still belongs to this lady named J.K.
Rowling. You might have heard of her.
Author's note – still begging for reviews.
Chapter Two The Picture
"You don't remember me But I remember you I lie awake and try so hard Not to think of you But who can decide what they dream? And dream I do."
—Evanescence
Nine hours later, Remus collapsed into bed. His morning had consisted of two classes of first years; one Slytherin and Ravenclaw, one Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. The children varied from being heartbreakingly nervous to being so arrogant he wanted to strangle them. His afternoon class was fifth years from Gryffindor and Slytherin, and that was the one which had most depleted him. He had the infamous Weasley twins, who had ironically taken the seats Sirius and James used to favor. Fortunately, they didn't appear to be planning any mischief for him at the moment ... he knew what it looked like when someone was plotting to wreak havoc.
His first years had been a little easier, except for those who gave him the unsettling feeling they already knew whatever he might try to teach them. One in particular gave him this feeling, a Gryffindor named Dominic Cole. He almost seemed to fit better with the Slytherin students. On first impression, Remus predicted that he would have alienated half the school before Christmas. He remembered that the Sorting Hat had taken a good ten minutes to sort him, which hadn't done much for the nerves of the other first years. Dominic had not seemed at all nervous.
After that came dinner, and the year's first staff meeting, complete with snide comments from Snape and the out-of-joint feeling that comes with a new place of employment.
Opening his eyes, Remus found himself looking at one of his pictures. It was an old one, one he'd always loved. The picture had been taken -- he didn't remember who they'd roped into playing photographer -- after Gryffindor won the House Cup against Ravenclaw in their seventh year. Peter had been in it once, but he'd left the frame for some reason -- possibly embarassed at being the "extra" male in the picture. James was on the far left, Lily next to him, and Marsha next to Lily. Remus felt a stir of old grief when he looked at Marsha. Next to the girls sat Remus himself, then Sirius and his current girlfriend. They were sitting in a row under that familiar beech tree. James and Sirius were still in their Quidditch robes. Remus, Marsha and Lily defiantly wore little Ravenclaw pins on the front of their robes. James was very tousled, grinning at the camera. Lily was next to him, her dark chestnut hair tied back, smiling lightheartedly. And Marsha ... Remus was willing to admit (guardedly) that any girl was in shadow next to slender, aristocratic Lily, but in this picture, Marsha was alive with her own effervescent, penny-bright prettiness, her red-golden hair shining. Caught in the same mote-filled sunbeam, the girls looked like they ought to come as a set.
It was also a rather flattering picture of Remus himself. He was giving the camera a gentle, ironic smile, which occasionally turned into an affectionate, half-exasperated glance toward Sirius. And Sirius was laughing, his hair falling slightly into his eyes, but like always as though he meant it that way. He'd been wearing it a bit long at the time, just barely long enough to annoy his mother. He looked perfectly delighted with life, his arm around the waist of his female companion.
Remus didn't remember the girl in the picture. He'd always had an impression Sirius had chosen the nearest female and drafted her for the photograph. She was pretty, with long curly hair and bright green eyes, and had her head on Sirius's shoulder. Then, looking closer, Remus wondered why he couldn't remember this one. They certainly looked like they knew each other quite well. They were smiling at each other, completely lost in their own shared world, and suddenly Remus knew the real meaning of puppy love. And something else caught his eye ... in the picture, Sirius occasionally gestured proudly at the girl's left hand. Remus followed the gesture and saw that she was wearing a beautiful emerald ring.
What in the world ...
The pair was stunningly backlit, their jet-black hair and crimson robes glowing with a soft halo of gold. Sirius was only looking out of the picture half the time. He and his companion had eyes only for each other. She looked up at him, bright eyes sparkling, her long curly hair spilling over his robes. Even the most determined girls rarely looked that lovelorn with Sirius. Probably they didn't want to get their hopes up too far. He did remember the girl. What had been her name? If they'd been engaged ... and that was how it looked ... shouldn't Remus remember her name? Her face was familiar, but that could be only because he'd looked at this picture so long.
It bothered him, a little ... more than a little. Deciding to sleep on that -- and everything else for that matter -- he turned over and tried to go to sleep.
The girl was wearing Quidditch robes, too.
"No," Remus told himself firmly. "I am going to sleep. Now. I'll
remember later."
He gave up after another minute, sat up in bed, and examined the picture closely. The girl was definitely in Quidditch robes. Now that he'd noticed that Sirius was indicating her ring, it seemed amazing he hadn't seen it long since.
"I'm going to sleep," he insisted to himself. He lay down, waited a minute, then got back up, muttering to himself. He grabbed his shabby cloak, lit his wand, and set off for the trophy room.
After a bit of searching and rummaging, he found it; the 1977 House Cup, balanced in a holder on the red and gold trophy plaque. He examined the gold plates arranged around its sides. At the bottom was the one that said "Captain: James Potter, Seeker." He started looking for female names. There were two girl Chasers, Leandra and Oriel; but he was sure it wasn't Leandra, and remembered Oriel being platinum blonde. Then Sirius' apparent fiancee had to be the Keeper.
There it was, right next to the plaque that bore Sirius's name. "Cambri Terrangs, Keeper."
Of course. Of course. How could he possibly have forgotten Cambri? She'd been one of his best friends, hadn't she? Yes; yes, she had. And that was definitely her in the picture. Yes -- Sirius had made Remus help him pick out an engagement ring. How could he have forgotten that?
But to forget Cambri herself, who she was, that she ever even existed -- that was almost like forgetting Marsha. It must have been some powerful magic that made him forget her for so long. But why would such a spell be placed? And what had happened to Cambri?
She'd married Sirius, hadn't she? Yes. He hazily remembered their wedding. And then ... she'd vanished. Three months into her marriage, she left home to visit the apothecary at Knockturn Alley, and no one ever saw her again. Sirius had been torn up --
No. No. He hadn't been. Remus had sensed deception at the time, had sensed that the grief was all an act. He'd loved Cambri, though --
And he "loved" James and Lily, didn't he? Remus thought cynically. We know he was a good actor.
Then how was it that Remus didn't remember her? He racked his brains for a while, then gave up.
But how ... He was working on a different problem again. If I knew he wasn't really that grieved ... sad, maybe, but not as depressed as he pretended ... If I knew, then how was it he fooled me when he pretended to love Cambri?
Because he wasn't pretending. He loved her. He was slave to her every whim, that's how absolutely head-over-heels in love he was. (Isn't that how you're supposed to be? The back of his mind wondered.) He fell for her like I never thought Sirius could. I know because I know what love is. I had Marsha for those years and I know what it's like. He couldn't have fooled me.
But then there's another problem. Betraying us would be betraying Cambri. And he wouldn't have done that, wouldn't have wanted even to insult her memory. Unless Cambri was already with the Dark Lord ...
No, I'll never believe that. But I didn't believe it of Sirius either.
She didn't do that. She wouldn't. She wouldn't ever.
Remus gave up and went to bed. In the pesky way of answers, this one had just turned up more questions.
Author's note – thanks for reading. Now could you review? Please? Tell me if you hated it, or even maybe liked it? (Yes, that was a compliment- fish, and a shameless one.) Chapter three up soon. There'll probably be nine chapters and an epilogue.
Author's note – still begging for reviews.
Chapter Two The Picture
"You don't remember me But I remember you I lie awake and try so hard Not to think of you But who can decide what they dream? And dream I do."
—Evanescence
Nine hours later, Remus collapsed into bed. His morning had consisted of two classes of first years; one Slytherin and Ravenclaw, one Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. The children varied from being heartbreakingly nervous to being so arrogant he wanted to strangle them. His afternoon class was fifth years from Gryffindor and Slytherin, and that was the one which had most depleted him. He had the infamous Weasley twins, who had ironically taken the seats Sirius and James used to favor. Fortunately, they didn't appear to be planning any mischief for him at the moment ... he knew what it looked like when someone was plotting to wreak havoc.
His first years had been a little easier, except for those who gave him the unsettling feeling they already knew whatever he might try to teach them. One in particular gave him this feeling, a Gryffindor named Dominic Cole. He almost seemed to fit better with the Slytherin students. On first impression, Remus predicted that he would have alienated half the school before Christmas. He remembered that the Sorting Hat had taken a good ten minutes to sort him, which hadn't done much for the nerves of the other first years. Dominic had not seemed at all nervous.
After that came dinner, and the year's first staff meeting, complete with snide comments from Snape and the out-of-joint feeling that comes with a new place of employment.
Opening his eyes, Remus found himself looking at one of his pictures. It was an old one, one he'd always loved. The picture had been taken -- he didn't remember who they'd roped into playing photographer -- after Gryffindor won the House Cup against Ravenclaw in their seventh year. Peter had been in it once, but he'd left the frame for some reason -- possibly embarassed at being the "extra" male in the picture. James was on the far left, Lily next to him, and Marsha next to Lily. Remus felt a stir of old grief when he looked at Marsha. Next to the girls sat Remus himself, then Sirius and his current girlfriend. They were sitting in a row under that familiar beech tree. James and Sirius were still in their Quidditch robes. Remus, Marsha and Lily defiantly wore little Ravenclaw pins on the front of their robes. James was very tousled, grinning at the camera. Lily was next to him, her dark chestnut hair tied back, smiling lightheartedly. And Marsha ... Remus was willing to admit (guardedly) that any girl was in shadow next to slender, aristocratic Lily, but in this picture, Marsha was alive with her own effervescent, penny-bright prettiness, her red-golden hair shining. Caught in the same mote-filled sunbeam, the girls looked like they ought to come as a set.
It was also a rather flattering picture of Remus himself. He was giving the camera a gentle, ironic smile, which occasionally turned into an affectionate, half-exasperated glance toward Sirius. And Sirius was laughing, his hair falling slightly into his eyes, but like always as though he meant it that way. He'd been wearing it a bit long at the time, just barely long enough to annoy his mother. He looked perfectly delighted with life, his arm around the waist of his female companion.
Remus didn't remember the girl in the picture. He'd always had an impression Sirius had chosen the nearest female and drafted her for the photograph. She was pretty, with long curly hair and bright green eyes, and had her head on Sirius's shoulder. Then, looking closer, Remus wondered why he couldn't remember this one. They certainly looked like they knew each other quite well. They were smiling at each other, completely lost in their own shared world, and suddenly Remus knew the real meaning of puppy love. And something else caught his eye ... in the picture, Sirius occasionally gestured proudly at the girl's left hand. Remus followed the gesture and saw that she was wearing a beautiful emerald ring.
What in the world ...
The pair was stunningly backlit, their jet-black hair and crimson robes glowing with a soft halo of gold. Sirius was only looking out of the picture half the time. He and his companion had eyes only for each other. She looked up at him, bright eyes sparkling, her long curly hair spilling over his robes. Even the most determined girls rarely looked that lovelorn with Sirius. Probably they didn't want to get their hopes up too far. He did remember the girl. What had been her name? If they'd been engaged ... and that was how it looked ... shouldn't Remus remember her name? Her face was familiar, but that could be only because he'd looked at this picture so long.
It bothered him, a little ... more than a little. Deciding to sleep on that -- and everything else for that matter -- he turned over and tried to go to sleep.
The girl was wearing Quidditch robes, too.
"No," Remus told himself firmly. "I am going to sleep. Now. I'll
remember later."
He gave up after another minute, sat up in bed, and examined the picture closely. The girl was definitely in Quidditch robes. Now that he'd noticed that Sirius was indicating her ring, it seemed amazing he hadn't seen it long since.
"I'm going to sleep," he insisted to himself. He lay down, waited a minute, then got back up, muttering to himself. He grabbed his shabby cloak, lit his wand, and set off for the trophy room.
After a bit of searching and rummaging, he found it; the 1977 House Cup, balanced in a holder on the red and gold trophy plaque. He examined the gold plates arranged around its sides. At the bottom was the one that said "Captain: James Potter, Seeker." He started looking for female names. There were two girl Chasers, Leandra and Oriel; but he was sure it wasn't Leandra, and remembered Oriel being platinum blonde. Then Sirius' apparent fiancee had to be the Keeper.
There it was, right next to the plaque that bore Sirius's name. "Cambri Terrangs, Keeper."
Of course. Of course. How could he possibly have forgotten Cambri? She'd been one of his best friends, hadn't she? Yes; yes, she had. And that was definitely her in the picture. Yes -- Sirius had made Remus help him pick out an engagement ring. How could he have forgotten that?
But to forget Cambri herself, who she was, that she ever even existed -- that was almost like forgetting Marsha. It must have been some powerful magic that made him forget her for so long. But why would such a spell be placed? And what had happened to Cambri?
She'd married Sirius, hadn't she? Yes. He hazily remembered their wedding. And then ... she'd vanished. Three months into her marriage, she left home to visit the apothecary at Knockturn Alley, and no one ever saw her again. Sirius had been torn up --
No. No. He hadn't been. Remus had sensed deception at the time, had sensed that the grief was all an act. He'd loved Cambri, though --
And he "loved" James and Lily, didn't he? Remus thought cynically. We know he was a good actor.
Then how was it that Remus didn't remember her? He racked his brains for a while, then gave up.
But how ... He was working on a different problem again. If I knew he wasn't really that grieved ... sad, maybe, but not as depressed as he pretended ... If I knew, then how was it he fooled me when he pretended to love Cambri?
Because he wasn't pretending. He loved her. He was slave to her every whim, that's how absolutely head-over-heels in love he was. (Isn't that how you're supposed to be? The back of his mind wondered.) He fell for her like I never thought Sirius could. I know because I know what love is. I had Marsha for those years and I know what it's like. He couldn't have fooled me.
But then there's another problem. Betraying us would be betraying Cambri. And he wouldn't have done that, wouldn't have wanted even to insult her memory. Unless Cambri was already with the Dark Lord ...
No, I'll never believe that. But I didn't believe it of Sirius either.
She didn't do that. She wouldn't. She wouldn't ever.
Remus gave up and went to bed. In the pesky way of answers, this one had just turned up more questions.
Author's note – thanks for reading. Now could you review? Please? Tell me if you hated it, or even maybe liked it? (Yes, that was a compliment- fish, and a shameless one.) Chapter three up soon. There'll probably be nine chapters and an epilogue.