Fixing to Fly

Chapter Four

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Keely yawned loudly, mouth gaping open wide enough for Darcy to see her tonsils within before the Scottish girl snapped her jaw shut and slid out of her seat on the sofa. "Well, I don't know about you," she said, glancing around at the assembly of seventh-years around the fire, "but I'm going up to bed."

The group of six were the last remaining Gryffindors in the common room, all their brethren retired up to the dorms. According to Darcy's watch, it was some time after midnight, and she wanted very much to join her friend as the brunette lurched sleepily up the stairs. In fact, she'd wanted to go to bed for over an hour now, but she hadn't. In truth, she couldn't, or the argument she knew was shortly coming would be held upstairs in the dorms for all to hear, and it was so much easier just to wait and be assured privacy.

No one else could've guessed that Darcy was dreading the departure of her companions. In fact, she wouldn't have been surprised if a great many of them had retired early, thinking she wanted to spend a few minutes alone with her boyfriend to… catch up. They had all watched Kotter spend the evening fussing over her—peppering her with little kisses, offering her backrubs, hinting at the gifts he was thinking of buying her, and of course constantly dropping the 'L' word. He had even made quite the display of apologizing to her for his behavior in the Great Hall. They had smiled wistfully, admiring and envying the perfect couple. They had politely teased them with queries about children's names and wedding dates. They had bought right into the act, just like they always did.

Darcy, however, being an actress herself, did not believe a minute of it. This was Kotter's way of showing the world that she was his property, including all exclusive rights and privileges. It was also a message to those, like the Weasley twins, who dared to show interest in Darcy beyond the realm of mere schoolmate friendship. A message that Kotter Baines did not like to share his toys.

Staring longingly up at the dorms, where her comfy, familiar bed lay waiting, she thought about her own role performed over the course of the evening, that of passive puppet. She hadn't played in to Kotter's "loving couple" routine, but neither had she resisted it, content to simply exist for the moment; others could take from it what they wanted. She knew Fred and George saw the truth, and Brian of course, maybe a few others, but she didn't care.

Toby was standing up now, as well, with Loren joining him momentarily. "I haven't got up before noon in two months; I better go to bed now," remarked Toby and, bidding Darcy goodnight with a ruffle to her wavy gold locks, he headed upstairs, a sleepy-looking Loren in tow. Finally, just she, Kotter, and Brian remained. She could tell Brian was reluctant to leave, debating whether or not to intervene in the couple's affairs and spare her the pain of another argument. Touching as his motives were, she could also tell Kotter was getting irritated.

"Go on up to bed, Bri," she said finally, leaning over to kiss his cheek and whispering in his ear, "It'll be fine. I'll be fine. Promise." She leaned back again, shot him a smile. "Night."

Hesitantly he stood, eyed the two, and eventually forced an uneasy smile. "Goodnight Darcy. I'll see you tomorrow morning then, at breakfast." He started to walk away, then hastily thought to add, "You too, Kotter," before disappearing up the staircase.

They were now alone, and the silence had never been so oppressive. Kotter still had his arm about her shoulders, drawing her close to him, and between his body heat and the warmth of the fire, Darcy felt rather lightheaded as beads of sweat trickled down her back. She'd removed her robes long ago, but her sweater and button-down held the heat to her flesh like an oven. What she wouldn't give to escape upstairs, slip out of her stifling wool school uniform and into her favorite silk pajamas, and then between the cool cotton sheets of her bed…

Another long moment of silence stretched painfully out, and Darcy knew this was another way Kotter controlled her. Things always had to start on his terms. If she spoke first, tried to pull the first punch, he would simply postpone the argument to a later time when the initial blow was his, and usually did so at times she wasn't expecting it—like when they were in crowded places. And so again, she found herself forced to play by his rules.

She nearly breathed a sigh of relief when he finally spoke, but the question he asked knocked all the breath right out of her instead. "So what were you doing alone today with that fourth-year, Wood?"

"Excuse me?" she demanded, inexplicably offended by the query.

Kotter continued on as though she'd never spoke. "I heard Brian say you told him you didn't know Wood, and yet you two seemed friendly enough to be holding hands. Merlin, Darcy, if you're going to cheat on me, at least have the sense to it somewhere private. I thought you were smarter than that," he sneered, making sure she got the full effect of his insult.

A laugh of exasperation left the blonde as she stared at him incredulously. "Love of god, Kotter, you think I'm cheating on you? Please!"

"Well, I know what I saw in that cabin. I do have eyes!"

He took his arm off her shoulders with a quick jerk, allowing her to scout away from him to the other end of the couch. Freed from his firm grasp, Darcy immediately slipped her sweater over her head and unbuttoned the top few buttons of her shirt, delighting in the cool that flooded her body. Comfortable now, she was ready to fight, and turned to face him as though they were dueling opponents. The cold, cruel words they would likely soon be flinging at each other were perhaps even more potent than the worst curses.

"You know, I think it's about time you got your eyes checked," she shot back, folding her arms defensively over her chest. "You seem to see a lot of things, Kotter. According you, I'm cheating with every guy that crosses my line of vision."

Unable to properly respond to that, he instead countered, "I notice you haven't answered my question about Wood yet. Got something to hide?"

Darcy glowered at him. "Yeah, Quidditch strategies," she snapped sarcastically, and at his look of confusion, she added, "Brian told me I might want to talk to Oliver Wood about becoming Gryffindor's Keeper, only I couldn't remember who Wood was. While I was looking for my food, I happened to run into him, and we were in the process of introducing ourselves when you arrived. Hence, the handshake—and yes, that's all it was, a goddamn handshake."

"To me it looked like—"

"I don't care what it looked like to you! I'm sick of this, Kotter, you seeing something happening every time I so much as speak to a member of the opposite sex, it's ridiculous! We went through this same routine three years ago when I started studying with Percy Weasley, and then again last year when Fred and George arrived!"

Angrily he hissed, "You know how I feel about the Weasleys, Darcy. None of them are any good, just look at those twins! Always in trouble. The type who'd get with any girl just because they could. And Percy is a stuck-up, anal retentive, know-it-all who spends your so-called 'study sessions' staring at you and pining away for you because he knows you're too good for him."

"I'm not too good for anybody, Kotter, and you don't know a thing about Percy. He's got a brilliant, kind heart and a sharp wit, but you've got to get past his defenses first, which is something you'd never bother to do, because judging people without really knowing them is so much easier for you, isn't it? As for the twins, they're just trying to have fun. They love life, and they're trying to enjoy themselves while they still can. I can see why that would threaten you, though, I mean—god, forbid anyone ever enjoy themselves, right Kotter?"

"Not when it's at my expense!"

She laughed cruelly, "Oh that's right, I forgot. Kotter's famous image. Can't be tarnished. Can't be part of a House where people actually have fun. Can't have a girlfriend who has a mind of her own. Then maybe you got the wrong girl, hun." She gave her hair an indignant toss.

A long pause from the male Gryffindor, then, "Maybe I do."

"Well, good, it's about time we both agreed on that," she quickly replied, her expression dead sober. "Just say the word, Kotter, and you are free. No, I take that back. Say the word, and let me be free. You're the one who holds the leash in this relationship anyway, you've made that perfectly clear. You want out? Fine, I'm out. But you have to let me go then, too."

Kotter seemed to be considering this with an air of cool disinterest, but Darcy could see in his eyes a sudden glimmer of fear. She'd hit the cord; the battle was now hers… but would by no means yield the results she desired. She wanted for him to say he didn't want her anymore, maybe even that he never wanted to speak to her again, that she made him sick. That would mean he would leave her alone and she was finally free. But no, the only thing she'd succeeded in again tonight was instilling in him the fear he was losing her, which would make him cling to her that much tighter.

Apparently he'd finished contemplating her last threat. He was staring down the couch at her with a set look on his features. "You're not going to talk to Wood again," he said with finality.

"Um, I'll talk to whomever I want, thank you," she replied, feeling disgusted with her so-called 'relationship' and overbearing boyfriend. "And one more command like that from you and I promise you, I will cut this relationship off right now, no coming back."

"Oh, Darcy, don't do that!" he suddenly pleaded, and hearing the desperation in his own voice, he quickly added in a nonchalant tone, "I mean, don't be ridiculous. You know I'd do anything for you. You name it, I'll do it baby. If you want to talk to Wood, or those psychotic twins, or know-it-all Weasley, that's your choice. Okay?"

"Okay." Darcy wished she could scream.

Before she could react, Kotter had closed the distance between them and was beside her again, reaching out to grasp her face in his hands. "You know I love you, right? You know that," he told her, kissing each eyelid before moving down to her lips. She let him have a moment of rolling his tongue around her mouth, but when his hand began to slip conspicuously up toward her breast, she pulled away.

"I'm tired, Kotter," she said, on her feet and stepping away from the couch before he could catch her, bring her back. "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"I love you, DC," came his voice as she hurried up the staircase.

"I really wish you didn't," she whispered, and disappeared into the quiet darkness of her dorm room. She could hear Keely, her only roommate's quiet snores from behind the drawn curtains of the Scot's bed and a glance at her own bedside alarm clock told Darcy it was just after two in the morning. She changed swiftly into her pajamas, crawled into her familiar, comfy bed, drew the curtains around, and lay back. Above her, the canopy twinkled with stars; it was enchanted in much the same fashion as the Great Hall, a parting gift from Charlie Weasley when he graduated after her first year, as she took his place as Gryffindor Seeker. He had added a special charm to hers that would react to her moods, and when she felt particularly low, a glorious meteor shower would appear over her bed. Tonight, a million falling stars seemed to be streaking across her special nightscape.

Exhausted despite her troubled mind, it took only a few minutes before the stars overhead worked their magic, and Darcy soon joined Keely in the warm confines of slumber.