I would've had this up earlier, like Monday, but I couldn't log in! OH DOOM!
Wild Roses- Yes, no more victimizing... I'm not sure he's even in this chapter at all... O.o Ah-ha! But he is mentioned!
Solaris Moon- Pretty much you can read any story I started after this one to know the fun stuff they do after this... Technically... But I wrote the epilogue. 'Snot much of an epilogue, either...
Bar-Ohki- Write a story with you, eh... Hmmm... Tempting... Muwahahaha. Hyenas spawning from Hiei's dirty socks, eh.... Hmmmmm... Friendly strangling, you say... Hmmmm... Cough. Hack. I dunno what the deal with that was... O.o Something weird, probably. But sure, I'll write a story with you, I've never really done that before but Hey! Whatever!
Draikitha- Ah... I wrote an epilogue... Couldn't think of anything else to add to the actual story, so............. Heh heh.
kiinu- NERDS! ::Drools::
animerocker- Ah, yes, but popular belief can be true in my story because I was unaware of such facts... Maha.
Robin Autumn- Forgiveness... Hmm... If I can remember what he did... O.o Anyway, just read, you'll... probably not know because I did a crappy job on the epilogue.
C.C.C.- Ahh... Chapter ten... The tenth chapter... The tenth chapter, the chapter after the ninth... The chapter before the eleventh but after the ninth, and yet not a decimal... Ten... Wow...
PicoPicoZufuChan- CHOCOLATE! Ukranian chocolate! From Ukrainia! Muwahaha! Or maybe from Ukrain. Ukrainiania? Ahh, yes, but it is not, forsooth, for my BRAIN IS DEAD! I've been really hyper today. Unknown reasons for that, yes.
Shessha's Crazy- MY SHINY! ::gets tackled and dies:: Well would you look at that? I'm dead. Hm. Pity. Well, off to see Koenma! ::floats away to threaten Koenma's life if he doesn't bring her back::
Mari Youma- I almost forgot about Karasu while writing this... You'll be able to tell when you read it. :D
Meiuko- Glad you liked it. :D
Okami Youkai- I think this chapter will scare you just as bad...
Black Cat- Aren't you lucky Kurama looks out for your safety by tying you to a chair... Yay. Tied to a chair. How very safe...
suriko song- Hee hee. Muwahahaha. Issues I have indeed.
xkuroxshinobix- Okay. I plan on it. :D
Abanasinia- Okay! I wrote an epilogue-type-thing but it kinda sucks, but here it is anyway!
Rei Jaganshi- I update my stories now YOU UPDATE YOURS! GRR! ::does wavey thingy with arms:: I'm going nuts! Nobody's updating and I really wanna read yourzzzzzzzz! Grrrrrr! (I'm all hyper-like, I've been acting more like Shadow than myself today... I've been dancing and singing and waving my arms around like a lunatic. I'm scaring myself.)
kaida13- Hiei is mean, that's how he dares. O.o And she's not really his girlfriend...... Talking in third person is scary... But I would. Muwaha! And who knows if the monk stoled the money or not... The world may never know...
nutari- It's really easy for me to plan out my day: Wake up, take a shower, get on the computer for six hours or more, go to my room and write on paper or watch anime tapes, come back downstairs to watch Futurama and Inuyasha, go to bed, repeat. Rarely is my schedule differnet during summer. :D
baka-onna2003- School doesn't start for me until August 30th...
CHAPTER ELEVEN
EPILEPI-LOG
"CANNONBALL!!!"
"No, Shadow!"
Splash.
Yup. After everyone's job sentencing was up, Hiei retired (or maybe he just quit) with enough money that Shadow stored all of it in the bank. That is, all but enough to get an in-ground pool in her backyard.
There. That is the epilogue.
"NO IT'S NOT!"
God.
Shadow was on the diving board, staring down at a tube (I think I used to call them doughnuts... Those inflatable things that, well... look like doughnuts. Inner tube or whatever).
"Who wants to bet I can dive through the hole on that thing?"
"Shadow, those things are made so they get wedged around you and you have to tear them apart to get them off. You can't--"
"BET ACCEPTED!" She dove. The tube submerged with her, and she was forced to resurface quickly, as it had gotten stuck around her upper arms.
"I HAVE BEEN ATTACKED BY AN EVIL INFLATABLE FLOATATION ASSISTANCE DEVICE OF MURDEROUS CAPACITY AND DEADLY POTENTIAL!" Shadow said, standing in the shallow end. "And if it doesn't get the hell off me, I'll kill it."
"Have fun!" Eclipse squealed, doing a flip of the diving board. "Divey divey di--"
Splash.
Hiei, meanwhile, was sitting shirtless a few feet away, acting as lifeguard to the two stupid girls because he feared they would both die should he not watch them. And they probably would.
"Hey, Mister Lifeguard Sir! What would you do if I was drowning horribly and in great danger of filling my poor lungs full of water and dying because of it?"
"I would... Uh... Have Eclipse to mouth to mouth on you."
"No you wouldn't! Cuz she'd let me die!"
"Fine."
"FINE? FINE!" Shadow fell forward into the water and landed with a smack, doing the dead man's float (except that she's not a man). Hiei stared at her. And stared. And she didn't move. Finally, after a minute or so when she'd sunk to the bottom, he got a rope and fished her out, acting bored and "Fine, I'll play along, stupid" more than concerned. He pulled her onto his lap and looked down at her. She blew a bubble. He continued staring.
"I'M DYING, DON'T YOU GIVE A SHITAKE MUSHROOM?" she screamed. He didn't even blink.
"I care, Shadow," he said dryly. "But you aren't dying. However, Eclipse might be, because she's been underwater for about five minutes now.
"NEVER MIND! WHAT AM I SAYING? YOU SAID IT'D BE FINE IF I DIED! YOU DON'T CARE! FINE!" Shadow took a deep breath and held it. Hiei stared at her until she started turning colors.
"Shadow... Um... I said I care... Is that not enough?" Hiei asked, not sure how serious she was.
She was turning blue and glaring.
"Oh. I get it," Hiei said. He pulled her up against him and kissed her lips. "Happy?"
Eclipse exploded out of the water.
"I COULD BE DYING UNDERWATER AND YOU'RE UP HERE MAKING OUT! SHOWS HOW MUCH YOU CARE!"
Shadow let out her air and lay there gasping and laughing hysterically.
"But we don't care, Eclipse, don't you get it?" Shadow said jokingly. "Besides, you're half water demon, so you're pretty much just a giant frog!"
"FROG? WHERE?"
Hiei and Shadow snorted. "Idiot," they said in unison, shaking their heads. They looked identical (except for the fact that Shadow's a girl in a bathing suit and Hiei... well... isn't. Good thing, too, or I'd be scared).
"WE'RE COMING IN!" came Yusuke's voice from around the corner of the house. He came tearing around the corner with Kuwabara right behind him. They did cannonballs into the pool and sent huge waves through the water that splashed out and soaked Hiei and Shadow.
"Fatso! Be more considerate or I'll kick you out of my pool!" Shadow hollered.
"... What gives you the authority to do that?" Yusuke asked.
"Did you miss the part where I said it's my pool? Did you not notice it's in my back yard? Did something happen to your pea-sized brain to make you forget that HIEI earned all the money to buy this pool for me?!"
"... If Hiei earned all the money, wouldn't it be his pool?"
"No."
"Do you love him for buying it?"
"Yes."
"I'm sure he happily bought it, since now he's gonna be seeing you in a bathing suit every day," Kuwabara muttered. "Pervert."
"Well if that's the only reason he bought it, he could have saved a bunch of money and just asked me..." Shadow said. She wrapped her arms around his chest from behind and rested her head on his shoulder.
"That's not the only reason I let you use several hundred dollars to buy this," Hiei said. "It was so you'd stop nagging about it."
"It wasn't the only reason. Did you catch that?" Yusuke asked, nodding and grinning and pointing at the two fire demons.
"If you don't watch it, we'll turn that into a hot tub."
"... Where's Eclipse?" Yusuke said, trying to remove the attention he was getting.
"HA! See, Yusuke cares about me more than any of my closest friends! You guys should be ashamed!" Eclipse said after surfacing in the deep end of the pool.
"How can you hear all this underwater?" Kuwabara asked.
"I AM A WATER DEMON! I HAVE WATER DEMONY POWERS! MUWAHAHA!"
"You've also got stupid morony powers," Shadow said, sticking out her tongue.
"THANK YOU!"
Shadow groaned and rested her forehead against Hiei's shoulder. Then she smiled and stood up.
"Well! Time to go swimming!" She grabbed Hiei's wrist and dragged him to the pool, throwing him into the middle when she got close enough.
"Hey!" Yusuke whined, shaking his head vigorously to get the water out of his eyes. "Evil girl!"
"I'm not evil," Shadow said, smirking. She stuck one foot out over the pool, stood there for a second, then fell face-first into the pool. Smack.
Hiei, soaking wet, swam to the closest side and was about to climb out when two psychotic girls tackled him and dragged him back in.
"THERE'S NO ESCAPY!" Shadow said, laughing maniacally. "You will swim!"
"Must I?"
"Isn't that what I just said?"
"Not in those exact words..."
"If you don't stay in this pool, I will drown myself!"
"No you won't."
"Wanna bet?" Shadow started walking towards the deepest part of the pool.
"Fine! God!"
"Where's Kurama?" Eclipse asked.
"He's doing schoolwork," Yusuke answered.
"What's that? I've never done it before," Eclipse said cluelessly.
"I would imagine you had, Eclipse, since you're an A student," Kuwabara said.
"You get A's in school?" Shadow asked. "Is that like, A as in 'A Moron' or A as in 'A Idiot?'"
"They're A's as in 'A Smart Person,' you dipshit," Yusuke said. "Though I think she cheats off Kurama's papers or something."
"I'm not even in Kurama's class! How could I?"
"MAGICALLY!" Shadow sang. Then she fell forward and swam around underwater like a fish. Or a frog. Or a manatee.
Mainly, to sum this story up...
"WE ALL LIVED HAPPILY-ER EVER AFTERWARDS!" Eclipse cheered, thrusting her fist into the air and hitting Yusuke in the jaw accidentally. "Oops."
THE END.
ISN'T IT HAPPY?
Oh, and on a side note, Karasu hit on the wrong person and got thrown in jail. That's his 'happily ever after.' :D
. . . . . . . . . . . .
It sucked, didn't it.