Disclaimer: Oops I forgot this last time – I don't own Inu or the gang, I'm not that genius just yet…..unfortunately ;)

Author's Note:

Thanks to my lonely reviewer 'jim hawking jr'. If at least one person's reading then that's enough for me *smiles* Just to let you know the next couple chapters are going to be story building and filler until Katin (KA-tin) is older. If you find yourselves bored don't worry it'll pick up!

And now on with the show!

Chapter 2: Sorrow and Guilt

Inuyasha had reluctantly left the battleground in search of Miroku and Sango. Hoping to find some way to appease Katin's appetite and put an end to her wailing, he'd followed the couple's scent back to Kaeda's village.

He found Sango nursing Miroku's wounds, moving awkwardly around her bulging belly, applying wet compresses and bandages.

Miroku was the first to notice him standing in the doorway; he tried to push himself into a sitting position.

"Inuyasha what…..?"

He ignored the question and went straight to Kagome's pack. Rooting through it he brought out one of the bottles of formula that Kagome always packed incase there was an emergency and she had to leave Katin in Kaeda's care.

She's gone for good now.

Katin grasped the bottle's nipple firmly and made a quick job of satisfying her hunger.

Inuyasha refused to look at the other three, who sat staring at his back.

Kaeda was the first to break the silence.

"Inuyasha, what has happened?"

He said nothing. He was trying to concentrate everything on the child in his arms. He didn't want to think about what had happened.

"Inuyasha, what happened with Naraku?"

This time it was Miroku. He sensed something was very wrong. He had noticed the tear tracks on the hanyou's face.

Katin lost grip of the nipple and let out a frustrated squawk. Realizing he really wasn't as focused as on the child as he'd thought, Inuyasha moved the bottle back to the baby's lips.

Very worried now, and not used to this kind of silence from Inuyasha, the others exchanged worried looks.

Finally Sango stood and walked around to face him. She knelt down in front of him and tried to look him in the eyes.

"What….." she started, but then she saw the pain on his face, and she knew. Her eyes grew wide and filled with tears.

"Inuyasha, where is Kagome?" Her voice wavered and the tears spilled from her eyes.

He looked up to meet her eyes then, his own filled with angry tears.

She saw through his rough expression, saw this sorrow, and it broke her heart. She sat back letting out a heart-wrenching gasp.

"Sango," Miroku struggled to get up, worry for his wife overriding his injuries.

"No," she whispered, " No, it can't be….."

Inuyasha nodded, and looked away as if ashamed.

She gasped again, shaking her head, refusing to believe the truth.

"Sango, what is it child?" Kaeda moved to the other women. When she saw the look on her face she knew. "Oh," was all she could think to say.

"Just what….." Miroku started, becoming frustrated and increasingly worried.

Kaeda shook her head, indicating he should not press the issue in such a manner.

"Inuyasha," Kaeda spoke carefully, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Did Kagome fall?"

He stiffened defensively under her touch, but nodded.

As if the vocalization had made the fact more true and painful, Sango let out an agonized cry, stood and rushed to Miroku, burying her face in his chest.

"What of Naraku?" Kaeda continued, as if unaffected by the news and the other woman's dramatic outburst.

"He is dead." Inuyasha replied gruffly.

"I see," and with that the old woman left his side to tend to Sango. She didn't want the woman to get too worked up, it was not good for the baby she carried.

Miroku mindlessly patted Sango's heaving shoulders and stared at Inuyasha in disbelief. It could not be that such a woman as Lady Kagome would fall….. could it?! And Naraku was defeated…..? Suddenly realizing, he lifted his right hand and looked under its wrappings. Sure enough, the cursed hole was no longer there. Surprise and shock washed over him, as well as immense relief. Feeling guilty at being relieved in light of what had happened he looked back to the hanyou, wishing there were something he could say. His mind filled with questions. What had happened exactly? Where was the Jewel? Where was Kagome's body? What…..he forced himself to stop. There were more important things to think about. He looked to the baby…..what would happen to her?

The child in question was squabbling in Inuyasha's arms. Finished with the bottle, Katin was accustomed to a little back patting to release the discomfort of a full belly. Inuyasha had rarely participated in the feeding ritual, leaving such things to Kagome, knowing it was a special time between mother and daughter. Now, unsure of how to stop the baby's cries of discomfort he stared down at her. Her chubby cheeks were flushed and her little golden eyes were red. He just continued to stare. Her face was so much like her mothers…..

"Inuyasha, give the child to me." It was Kaeda. She had successfully calmed Sango down and had noticed his troubles.

He shot the old woman a fiery glare. Hell would freeze over before he relinquished his hold on his only link to self-control.

"She must be burped." Kaeda stated, reluctant to get any closer – she knew the look in the hanyou's eyes, and knew he was in a dangerous mood.

"Tell me what to do." He demanded gruffly.

The old woman nodded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And so the next few days passed. Inuyasha hardly ever let Katin out of his grasp, and then only to change and bathe her. Kaeda had showed him the basics and he was catching on.

Around him the villagers mourned the death of their protecting Miko. A ceremony was held in her honor. Sango and Miroku took comfort in each other's arms, displaying their grief openly. Inuyasha wished he could do something other than silently scowl. He knew the others wanted the chance to comfort him and talk about what had happened, but he didn't want any of it. He did not want to think or feel, he only wanted to get through the hell he had fallen into and keep his child safe.

If anyone spoke to him all he would do was return an icy glare. Even his friends started to keep their distance, approaching him very rarely and only speaking when he asked them a question.

Finally, though, Miroku got frustrated with his friend's refusal to deal with what had happened.

"Can't you see you're pushing everyone away?" He shouted angrily up to the hanyou, who was perched in his tree, feeding Katin. "We're your friends, let us help you!"

Inuyasha just glared down at him, eyes shooting daggers.

"We loved her too!"

Anger flared in his eyes at that, and he leapt down, startling both Katin and the monk. He must have had a murderous look on his face because Miroku actually sealed himself for an attack. Realizing he was about to pound his friend and do it holding a baby, Inuyasha turned away and headed into the forest.

"You've got to face it sometime!" The monk called as he disappeared into the trees. He knew Inuyasha had heard him but that he wasn't going to come back. Miroku sighed and headed back into the village.

"That guy is driving me!" He ranted to Sango as he entered the hut.

Her sad eyes met his, "He's lost so much….."

"I know!" He snapped, then pulled the reign on his anger. "I know he's hurting, but if he would just let us help him….."

"You know how he is."

"Yes, that's the problem! Don't you remember how he was when Kikyou….."

"Yes, but then he had Kagome. It's just how he deals with things, we can't change that."

"Well, what about Katin? He can't keep her up like this, the poor child….."

"Hush," Sango placed her hand softly on his arm, putting and end to his pacing. "When he's ready he'll let us back in."

Miroku sighed, knowing she was right.

"I only wish we could do something for him."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eventually the supplies in Kagome's pack ran out, and Inuyasha knew he could not put off traveling to Kagome's time any longer. Panic filled him at the thought of facing her mother and telling her that her daughter was dead. He knew he would have to be more kind with Kagome's family than he had been with the villagers and his friends. He wanted them to know he mourned her death. He knew Miroku and the others knew him enough to see through his anger, but to be gruff with the family would be uncalled for.

So, reluctantly, he made the trip.

There were many tears, but, to Inuyasha's surprise, no one, not once, even tried to blame him for not being able to protect her.

After a few days he returned to the Feudal Era, bringing with him enough supplies to care for Katin for a few weeks.

Kagome's mother had been reluctant to let her granddaughter leave, but she saw how tightly Inuyasha clung to her, and knew he needed the baby more then she.

Before he leapt down the well, she had I embraced him tightly.

"You come back here if you need anything, hear! Anything at all. I want you to think of us as family…..we are family! And don't you keep my granddaughter away for too long." With that she had surprised him with a kiss on the cheek and then caressed Katin's silky black hair.

He had nodded, a little dumbfounded, and returned to his time.

He was surprised to find that he had been comforted more by the words her family had not spoken than by what they had. He had been expecting blame and anger – basically what he was feeling himself – but he had only witnessed sadness and love.

That was where Kagome got it from…..

Not once had anyone said "Why didn't you stop her?" or "What were you doing while all this was happening?" They had listened to his retelling of the encounter and wept. They had spoken words of pride at Kagome's selflessness, and they thanked him for caring so for Katin. No one had even told him to "take good care of the child", though it was obvious that he hardly knew what he was doing.

Trusting fools, he thought bitterly. Though he was truly grateful.

He had been berating himself bitterly – when he allowed himself to think of what had happened – and rather then face it himself he had been waiting for someone else to bring it up. He wanted an excuse to retaliate, to try to prove it was not his fault. He could not convince himself though, he knew he was the one to blame. He had not been able to protect her. But if anyone dared to accuse him of such a thing, he might be able to try to convince them otherwise, and if someone else believed it, than it was possible he could believe it too.

But no one spoke a word of blame.

And so he continued to keep thoughts of it inside, letting his guilt eat away at his soul.

Thanks for reading!

Later Dayz!