Hiya, guys! I know I just put up that author's note today saying it wasn't an update, but you guys have been so sweet, I couldn't HELP but give you chapter nine! Really hope you enjoy. BTW, I've got the full plot of this completed to the T, and I REALLY hope you like how the story goes until its end (which I'm GUESSING will be somewhere around chapter 19-20; I'm not sure yet). R&R please!
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Chapter 9: Ken Watashi Mune Issei Tameni Otaku (And I Shall Cry For You)
The brilliant light of the stars overhead cast their radiance through the open shutters of the room. The beams spilled glittering patches upon the wooden floor that chased away the darkness into deep corners where they layered over themselves in waves, making the edges of the room that much darker. Not another source of light aided the starlight in its battle against the massing shadows, and that was just the way the room's occupant would have it.
He had lit not one single candle, not even to walk about the room; he didn't need it, for the stars were bright enough for his keen eyes to see. There he sat, cross-legged in the middle of the room, just beyond the reach of the starlight; a soul whose alliance was drawn to the dark and who dared not touch the light – even reach to grasp it for his sanity!
His long, fresh locks swayed in the breeze coming through the shutters, and silver-streaked themselves into the starlight. This was his to know forever. This ceaseless limbo between light and shadow was his domain: the only one he had known since childhood. All was still as his cream-coloured ears twitched delicately at the sound of the crickets outside. Then he heard voices outside the room, a little way from the doors that lead out onto the Southern balcony.
'Well,' he thought aimlessly, 'Now I know where she went.'
Inuyasha's alert ears had picked up the charmingly quaint and timid voice of Kagome. He had been worried when he looked down at the gathering in the next room and hadn't spotted her. As it was then, he saw no reason to go down and join the crowd, seeing as his only purpose there was to escort her around for the sake of noble propriety.
He heaved a sigh passed his dry lips. Even if she had been with the guests, he couldn't have shown his face. Not like this. His entire afternoon had been spent thinking of his mother, and he regretted it deeply, for now he had the heart of a kitten! He was helpless and fragile, without a harsh backlash or defense. He just couldn't bare the thought of showing up like this!
His neck craned upward so that his eyes met with the source of the light. Watching the stars float behind a thin cloud, he inhaled and exhaled slowly. "Even in my waking hours you haunt me, Okaa-san... Is there no rest for your son?" He closed his eyes and chuckled bitterly at his own question. "Of course not; he doesn't deserve it. After all, he's just a hanyou."
With that, he stood, and stepped further from the light, at which time he heard the creek of the side door into the reception hall open. Stately and collected as always, Sesshoumaru stepped inside and glanced through the darkness. With this inspection, Inuyasha waited for his brother to make the first move; it was easier to know what to expect from the Lord if one did.
Sesshoumaru's eyes jabbed Inuyasha like daggers with dull edges, for the osama was merely interested, rather than angry. "Enjoying yourself as always, I see."
Inuyasha puffed up his chest as best he could and hoped his voice came off as aggressive. "Shove it, Sesshoumaru! Leave me alone!"
It did no good. Sesshoumaru simply maneuvered his way around the room, touching an item or two as he went, and stopped at one of the windows. Carefully, he ran his claw along the shutter's edge. It was as though his world at that moment comprised solely of that shutter.
"It would work better," he said absently, though that was just the surface value, "if you closed these."
"What are you blabbing about, baka?!" Inuyasha gritted, forcing back a disappointed sigh. All he wanted was to be left the hell alone!
Sesshoumaru's empty eyes burned into him then, as their gazes met. The Inu-oji had to fight back a shudder at the knowingness hidden beneath the sheen of his brother eyes. Keen eyes that saw more than just the distance of the physical plain. He knew through Inuyasha's eyes what lay within his heart: a fact the hanyou always resented.
"Do not fool yourself, little brother," he replied calmly – too calmly for Inuyasha's liking. "You miss her. I know you do."
Inuyasha's mournful self-pity turned to a spark of anger as he spun around to face his brother, for during their intense stare he'd not found the courage to endure for long, and so he'd turned away. "That doesn't change a DAMN thing, bastard!! It's not like it could ever bring her back! Whether I miss her or not is my own damn business, you got that, Sesshoumaru!?!"
At his emotional outburst, Inuyasha could visibly see – to his utter astonishment – that Sesshoumaru's eyes had glinted over with emotion. No longer were they the portals to intricate oblivion, the windows into nothingness that he usually portrayed. They were alive and vibrant! A suspicious twinkle, as of a tear, gleamed momentarily in the corner of the right. But, as quickly as it had appeared, it was gone in an instant. The humanity and passionate emotion was smothered with the dripping venom of discipline and control. The man was gone.
"Rage is a weakness, Inuyasha. It will betray you no matter who your opponent. I would advice you to learn to control it. The sooner, the better – for you and the people who care about you."
"I have no idea what you're spouting out, but it sure as hell isn't right! Anger helps a man fight in battle!"
Sesshoumaru cast his eyes out to the stars. "A man, perhaps. It can be a powerful drive. But, do not forget you are not a man, Inuyasha," – Inuyasha flinched – "You are a demon, at least in part. The blood of our father flows more strongly in your veins than that ningen mother."
Inuyasha's face grew pale, then changed to a tinted red of hate at the insult to his dam. "Why you—!"
"After all," Sesshoumaru continued casually, "let's not forget that you are more demon than human most of the time, except, of course, on the new moon..."
Inuyasha went pale again, this time from a tinge of fright. "You won't tell the himes...?"
Sesshoumaru leaned out the window, and smiled as he spotted young Kagome-hime sitting with Shippou-sama on the balcony a short ways away. How he knew the two would connect immediately, he was not sure. It was a rare thing for him to question himself, but the osama found himself pondering that very notion now.
Inuyasha was between fury and utter horror as he waited impatiently for his brother's answer. It didn't come.
"Well?!"
"It is not my privilege to reveal that, Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru replied smoothly, almost in a purr. His eyes and ears continued to focus on the conversation outside rather than in. "Do you like her?"
"Who?!" Inuyasha spat indignantly, forcing his personal prerogatives back into his subconscious.
"Do not be a fool, little brother! I mean, young Kagome-hime: do you like her?
"I have spent many hours now weighing both sisters. I don't often find fault in my logic, but here I continue to be at a loss."
Inuyasha smirked. "Sounds like Big Brother has a crush on them! Either that, or he's so damn intrigued by that aura of theirs that he doesn't WANT to make the decision, for fear of ruining the mystery."
If Inuyasha's words stung him, Sesshoumaru gave no sign. His absence of mind continued as he listened diligently outside. Then, he moved from the window, and sat on a gleaming white silk cushion not far away. His hands lay in his lap passively, and his stature suggested on of preparation.
"I won't deny my interest in them, Inuyasha. However, never forget that my duty to the West comes before any personal pleasure—!"
Inuyasha cocked an eyebrow and smirked. "So, you find them a pleasurable dilemma, then?"
"How crudely you put it. But, yes, if you will. At least, for the moment."
A dark cloud seemed to cast over the stars outside, blotting their light from the room. Inuyasha was then hit by the realization of his brother's tenseness. "What's wrong?"
Sesshoumaru's mouth curled upward ever so slightly at the corner, before it fell once more. "Were I you, I would brace myself on firm ground."
"What?!" Inuyasha replied, bulking and stepping back in surprise. "Why?!"
"We are about to have a rather emotional encounter."
Before Inuyasha could respond, in deed or word, the doors leading to the balcony were thrown open defiantly, and a very pretty hime, bathed in the starlight behind her, stormed like a vixen into the dark room. She stopped after a few paces, and went pale as she spotted the brothers. A moment of silence passed, before the extremely furious glint returned to her eyes, and her face twisted in frustration and anger.
She waved her arms in the air emphatically, and poured out every polite way of insulting the present osama as she could think of. She didn't care that he was above her station! She didn't care that he could kill her – or have her killed! She didn't care that she was being hopelessly unreasonable in her throws of passionate dispute!
"Calm down, Kagome-hime," Sesshoumaru sighed, standing. "A raised voice upon a lovely lady such as yourself will not do."
"To the netherworld with propriety, Sesshoumaru-baka! How could you EVER deprive children of their right to grieve?!?! How could you force them into cold-heartedness!?! How—?!"
Sesshoumaru's palms came to rest lightly on Kagome's shoulders as he stood behind her looming. He paused a moment before he could continue. That same spark of lightning – even through the hime's clothing – was enough to make the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end delightedly! "Please, relax, Kagome-hime. I believe now would be a good time for you to retire to your chamber." Slowly but surely, he opened the doors leading to the gathering hall. A moment passed, and he called out a name softly, but sternly. "Rin!"
A jubilant young girl with chocolate hair bounded in, and bowed low before her lord. She remained silent as she awaited her instruction.
"Take Kagome-hime to her chambers, Rin. She has had too much excitement for tonight. Then, you must go to your rooms; it is time you slept, as well."
"But, Sesshoumaru-sama!" Rin pleaded, her eyes twinkling with tears. "I do not WANT to sleep yet! The gathering is so much fun!"
"Go, Rin." He replied, even sterner than before.
Rin looked at the ground, and her hands, which she had clasped during her plea, fell to her side as her shoulders slumped. "Of course, Sesshoumaru-sama..."
Kagome was absolutely insulted! How DARE he make assumptions for her! How dare he tell her what she could and could not do! Her mouth fell open to spit out another insult at Sesshoumaru, when Rin's small hand curled around hers, and the hime was, amazingly, dragged by the girl out of the room.
"There is no point arguing with Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin said. "He always gets his way. Especially for bed time!"
Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were left alone in silence as they watched the image of a retreating hime and grumpy little girl drift away through the crowd in the next room.
Nestled firmly without the vaulted recesses of his mind, Sesshoumaru couldn't help but flash a smile that didn't quite reach his face, but would have showed like brilliant crystal in his eyes had the light not been so dim in the room. 'She has spirit.'
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Oooh!!! It feels so GOOD to update for you all!! Anyway, I'll see you all in chapter 10 (which I am starting to write right now: at 7:21 p.m., May 15, 2004)!
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Chapter 9: Ken Watashi Mune Issei Tameni Otaku (And I Shall Cry For You)
The brilliant light of the stars overhead cast their radiance through the open shutters of the room. The beams spilled glittering patches upon the wooden floor that chased away the darkness into deep corners where they layered over themselves in waves, making the edges of the room that much darker. Not another source of light aided the starlight in its battle against the massing shadows, and that was just the way the room's occupant would have it.
He had lit not one single candle, not even to walk about the room; he didn't need it, for the stars were bright enough for his keen eyes to see. There he sat, cross-legged in the middle of the room, just beyond the reach of the starlight; a soul whose alliance was drawn to the dark and who dared not touch the light – even reach to grasp it for his sanity!
His long, fresh locks swayed in the breeze coming through the shutters, and silver-streaked themselves into the starlight. This was his to know forever. This ceaseless limbo between light and shadow was his domain: the only one he had known since childhood. All was still as his cream-coloured ears twitched delicately at the sound of the crickets outside. Then he heard voices outside the room, a little way from the doors that lead out onto the Southern balcony.
'Well,' he thought aimlessly, 'Now I know where she went.'
Inuyasha's alert ears had picked up the charmingly quaint and timid voice of Kagome. He had been worried when he looked down at the gathering in the next room and hadn't spotted her. As it was then, he saw no reason to go down and join the crowd, seeing as his only purpose there was to escort her around for the sake of noble propriety.
He heaved a sigh passed his dry lips. Even if she had been with the guests, he couldn't have shown his face. Not like this. His entire afternoon had been spent thinking of his mother, and he regretted it deeply, for now he had the heart of a kitten! He was helpless and fragile, without a harsh backlash or defense. He just couldn't bare the thought of showing up like this!
His neck craned upward so that his eyes met with the source of the light. Watching the stars float behind a thin cloud, he inhaled and exhaled slowly. "Even in my waking hours you haunt me, Okaa-san... Is there no rest for your son?" He closed his eyes and chuckled bitterly at his own question. "Of course not; he doesn't deserve it. After all, he's just a hanyou."
With that, he stood, and stepped further from the light, at which time he heard the creek of the side door into the reception hall open. Stately and collected as always, Sesshoumaru stepped inside and glanced through the darkness. With this inspection, Inuyasha waited for his brother to make the first move; it was easier to know what to expect from the Lord if one did.
Sesshoumaru's eyes jabbed Inuyasha like daggers with dull edges, for the osama was merely interested, rather than angry. "Enjoying yourself as always, I see."
Inuyasha puffed up his chest as best he could and hoped his voice came off as aggressive. "Shove it, Sesshoumaru! Leave me alone!"
It did no good. Sesshoumaru simply maneuvered his way around the room, touching an item or two as he went, and stopped at one of the windows. Carefully, he ran his claw along the shutter's edge. It was as though his world at that moment comprised solely of that shutter.
"It would work better," he said absently, though that was just the surface value, "if you closed these."
"What are you blabbing about, baka?!" Inuyasha gritted, forcing back a disappointed sigh. All he wanted was to be left the hell alone!
Sesshoumaru's empty eyes burned into him then, as their gazes met. The Inu-oji had to fight back a shudder at the knowingness hidden beneath the sheen of his brother eyes. Keen eyes that saw more than just the distance of the physical plain. He knew through Inuyasha's eyes what lay within his heart: a fact the hanyou always resented.
"Do not fool yourself, little brother," he replied calmly – too calmly for Inuyasha's liking. "You miss her. I know you do."
Inuyasha's mournful self-pity turned to a spark of anger as he spun around to face his brother, for during their intense stare he'd not found the courage to endure for long, and so he'd turned away. "That doesn't change a DAMN thing, bastard!! It's not like it could ever bring her back! Whether I miss her or not is my own damn business, you got that, Sesshoumaru!?!"
At his emotional outburst, Inuyasha could visibly see – to his utter astonishment – that Sesshoumaru's eyes had glinted over with emotion. No longer were they the portals to intricate oblivion, the windows into nothingness that he usually portrayed. They were alive and vibrant! A suspicious twinkle, as of a tear, gleamed momentarily in the corner of the right. But, as quickly as it had appeared, it was gone in an instant. The humanity and passionate emotion was smothered with the dripping venom of discipline and control. The man was gone.
"Rage is a weakness, Inuyasha. It will betray you no matter who your opponent. I would advice you to learn to control it. The sooner, the better – for you and the people who care about you."
"I have no idea what you're spouting out, but it sure as hell isn't right! Anger helps a man fight in battle!"
Sesshoumaru cast his eyes out to the stars. "A man, perhaps. It can be a powerful drive. But, do not forget you are not a man, Inuyasha," – Inuyasha flinched – "You are a demon, at least in part. The blood of our father flows more strongly in your veins than that ningen mother."
Inuyasha's face grew pale, then changed to a tinted red of hate at the insult to his dam. "Why you—!"
"After all," Sesshoumaru continued casually, "let's not forget that you are more demon than human most of the time, except, of course, on the new moon..."
Inuyasha went pale again, this time from a tinge of fright. "You won't tell the himes...?"
Sesshoumaru leaned out the window, and smiled as he spotted young Kagome-hime sitting with Shippou-sama on the balcony a short ways away. How he knew the two would connect immediately, he was not sure. It was a rare thing for him to question himself, but the osama found himself pondering that very notion now.
Inuyasha was between fury and utter horror as he waited impatiently for his brother's answer. It didn't come.
"Well?!"
"It is not my privilege to reveal that, Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru replied smoothly, almost in a purr. His eyes and ears continued to focus on the conversation outside rather than in. "Do you like her?"
"Who?!" Inuyasha spat indignantly, forcing his personal prerogatives back into his subconscious.
"Do not be a fool, little brother! I mean, young Kagome-hime: do you like her?
"I have spent many hours now weighing both sisters. I don't often find fault in my logic, but here I continue to be at a loss."
Inuyasha smirked. "Sounds like Big Brother has a crush on them! Either that, or he's so damn intrigued by that aura of theirs that he doesn't WANT to make the decision, for fear of ruining the mystery."
If Inuyasha's words stung him, Sesshoumaru gave no sign. His absence of mind continued as he listened diligently outside. Then, he moved from the window, and sat on a gleaming white silk cushion not far away. His hands lay in his lap passively, and his stature suggested on of preparation.
"I won't deny my interest in them, Inuyasha. However, never forget that my duty to the West comes before any personal pleasure—!"
Inuyasha cocked an eyebrow and smirked. "So, you find them a pleasurable dilemma, then?"
"How crudely you put it. But, yes, if you will. At least, for the moment."
A dark cloud seemed to cast over the stars outside, blotting their light from the room. Inuyasha was then hit by the realization of his brother's tenseness. "What's wrong?"
Sesshoumaru's mouth curled upward ever so slightly at the corner, before it fell once more. "Were I you, I would brace myself on firm ground."
"What?!" Inuyasha replied, bulking and stepping back in surprise. "Why?!"
"We are about to have a rather emotional encounter."
Before Inuyasha could respond, in deed or word, the doors leading to the balcony were thrown open defiantly, and a very pretty hime, bathed in the starlight behind her, stormed like a vixen into the dark room. She stopped after a few paces, and went pale as she spotted the brothers. A moment of silence passed, before the extremely furious glint returned to her eyes, and her face twisted in frustration and anger.
She waved her arms in the air emphatically, and poured out every polite way of insulting the present osama as she could think of. She didn't care that he was above her station! She didn't care that he could kill her – or have her killed! She didn't care that she was being hopelessly unreasonable in her throws of passionate dispute!
"Calm down, Kagome-hime," Sesshoumaru sighed, standing. "A raised voice upon a lovely lady such as yourself will not do."
"To the netherworld with propriety, Sesshoumaru-baka! How could you EVER deprive children of their right to grieve?!?! How could you force them into cold-heartedness!?! How—?!"
Sesshoumaru's palms came to rest lightly on Kagome's shoulders as he stood behind her looming. He paused a moment before he could continue. That same spark of lightning – even through the hime's clothing – was enough to make the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end delightedly! "Please, relax, Kagome-hime. I believe now would be a good time for you to retire to your chamber." Slowly but surely, he opened the doors leading to the gathering hall. A moment passed, and he called out a name softly, but sternly. "Rin!"
A jubilant young girl with chocolate hair bounded in, and bowed low before her lord. She remained silent as she awaited her instruction.
"Take Kagome-hime to her chambers, Rin. She has had too much excitement for tonight. Then, you must go to your rooms; it is time you slept, as well."
"But, Sesshoumaru-sama!" Rin pleaded, her eyes twinkling with tears. "I do not WANT to sleep yet! The gathering is so much fun!"
"Go, Rin." He replied, even sterner than before.
Rin looked at the ground, and her hands, which she had clasped during her plea, fell to her side as her shoulders slumped. "Of course, Sesshoumaru-sama..."
Kagome was absolutely insulted! How DARE he make assumptions for her! How dare he tell her what she could and could not do! Her mouth fell open to spit out another insult at Sesshoumaru, when Rin's small hand curled around hers, and the hime was, amazingly, dragged by the girl out of the room.
"There is no point arguing with Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin said. "He always gets his way. Especially for bed time!"
Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were left alone in silence as they watched the image of a retreating hime and grumpy little girl drift away through the crowd in the next room.
Nestled firmly without the vaulted recesses of his mind, Sesshoumaru couldn't help but flash a smile that didn't quite reach his face, but would have showed like brilliant crystal in his eyes had the light not been so dim in the room. 'She has spirit.'
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Oooh!!! It feels so GOOD to update for you all!! Anyway, I'll see you all in chapter 10 (which I am starting to write right now: at 7:21 p.m., May 15, 2004)!