Justin just stared at El-ahrairah, unwilling to believe it.
"What...did you say?" Justin whispered, trembling with denial.
The Prince of all Rabbits cursed himself for what he was about to do, but he repeated his statement anyway, saying, "Young one, I meant what I had said. You cannot stay here for your life is in perilous danger. If you do not return back to your home back in the world of men and leave the Garden of Eden, you will die."
There was a deathly pause. Then the boy asked, "But…but if I have to go home….can't I just come back to visit?"
The pain in El-ahrairah's heart intensified as he dolefully shook his head. He replied, "No, for once the gates to the Garden of Eden seal themselves, it will never be possible to return back. This…shall be the final parting."
The wall of resolve and strength then shattered in Justin's soul.
"But...but why?!" Justin protested, his voice getting louder and louder with hurt and disbelief, "You can't be serious! Please tell me you're kidding! I thought you said we defeated Elil-rah! I thought you said that the evil darkness was never going to return back in the Garden of Eden!!"
"I was not lying when I said that, Justin," El-ahrairah replied, "Elil-rah has been completely and utterly vanquished, and the evil will never return. By the end of this day, the evil shall be banished from this world...but the reason it still lingers is because of your presence here. The battle with Elil-rah was not the end, young one. There is still one evil that lingers here in the land beyond life and threatens to destroy us all."
Justin then clenched one hand into a fist over his chest as he said fervently and hurriedly, "Then give me the power and send me and Hazel-rah and the rest of the Watership Owsla to fight it! If the evil is still here in the land beyond life, then we have to destroy it before it has a chance to cause chaos again here!! And I don't care if it's still after me! I'm not afraid to face it!!"
The golden rabbit prince looked at Justin with such a meaningful, deep gaze of pity and sadness.
"Justin...the evil that still lingers here in this realm...is you."
It never rains, but it pours.
"What?" the teenager demanded roughly, hoarsely.
El-ahrairah then turned his head slightly to look solemnly at the dirt walls, unable to reflect on the pools of betrayal swimming in Justin's eyes, as he spoke, "Justin, my young child...I was not lying when I said it was an incredible, if not extreme, omission to allow your presence and being into the land beyond life, even if you were the one to bear the cross. Do you remember saying only moments ago, that despite the potential of love and altruism a human soul carries, it can be overpowered by the vice and ruthlessness of the dark, evil sins that can only appeal to the hearts of men? If you remain here, you could never maintain your heart and soul to be free of evil, and over time, your being in the land beyond life will eventually corrupt it, for this realm is a paradise ONLY for the beasts of Frith. Henceforth, your mere presence here threatens to upset the balance of good in the land beyond life. Remember, men can never come back to the Garden of Eden, and even now, you are no exception."
"But…but I saved everyone! I defeated Elil-rah!! I'm the cross-bearer!!" whined Justin, his voice strained with hurt.
"I know, and I am truly sorry for what I must ask you to do," Elil-rah said, hurt plainly evident with frustration and sorrow in his face, "but you must go back home before the sun sets. You see, before, God blessed your cross with the additional protection that allowed you to live your life here in the Garden of Eden without harm. For this is a spiritual world, and any physical human that steps foot into this realm will vanish and cease to exist. But you were immune so that you could fulfill your role to fight and defeat Elil-rah. However, now that the battle is done and your cross is no longer blessed with the power of light, it cannot protect you anymore, and your life will be in deadly risk if you remain here. Please, young one, do you not understand? You need to go home. You must go home."
"No!!" It was amazing how much defiant anger and denial the human could muster up into one word, into one plaint.
"Justin," El-ahrairah repeated patiently, a bit more firmly with worry, "Do you not see the danger your life shall be in? If you do not return back to your world of men before Frith sets, you will perish without any of the protective power of the cross blessed to you earlier."
"Then give it back to me!! Make me the cross-bearer again!! Damn it, give it to me!!" bellowed Justin, his hands clenched into fists, his face red with rage and disbelieving anguish.
El-ahrairah shook his head solemnly, "It was not of mine to give or take away; it was God's and He has His reasons to end this where it is as of now instead of a later time. Justin, do you not understand that you cannot question His decisions, of why He does not wish for you to remain here in the Garden of Eden longer than necessary? This is the best thing for all of us, whether you agree with it or not, you cannot ignore the fact that what will be will be. Your desire to live here indefinitely cannot happen for it is not meant to happen. You cannot stay here. You were determined upon to live back with your kind, your race, in the world of men and not in this realm. Justin, you cannot live here because He wants you to return back to your home."
"I don't care!!! You have no right!! THIS ISN'T FAIR!!!" Justin was now screaming himself hoarse, his blood rushing to his face.
El-ahrairah was truly remorseful as he looked at the teenager before him, agreeing silently at that aspect.
"Young one, please be understanding: if you do not go back to your home, you will forfeit your life and you shall surely die."
"THEN LET ME DIE!!!" wailed Justin, his hands wrenching his flannel shirt, the boy close to breaking down.
El-ahrairah's blue eyes widened slightly in surprise and his brow crinkled in concern. For the first time in his life, the Prince of Rabbits was truly, greatly, taken aback.
Justin continued, his eyes shut with tears of misery already starting to bead between the slits, "You honestly want me to go back?!! Back where no one wanted me?! Back where no one loved me or cared about me?! I don't want to go back, back to where I was never happy to begin with! You only saw me when I was born! You don't know what I went through growing up, how I was picked on and made fun of! You don't know how lonely I felt my entire life because I could never make friends, how my own mother left me alone to be abused by my own dad, and how I never had anyone to trust, to depend on, to look for reassurance that everything was going to be OK! No one loved me!! My life just sucked! It sucked!! And you want me to go back there?!! You're asking me to leave Hazel, Fiver, Bigwig and all the others!! The first and few of the only people who ever gave a damn about me!! They loved me!! They cared for me!! Even if I left, I would be so miserable, I'd die anyway!! I can't do that!! I can't say bye to them!! I can't…I won't!!!"
The teen nearly bellowed himself hoarse with that last utterance as he tore out of the warren, running into the caverns and burrows, lost and without any sense of direction. Yet it did not matter to the young human being. He just wanted to get out, away from El-ahrairah, and to hopefully see his friends, the rabbits of Watership Down, again. He wanted desperately to see them, have Hazel nuzzle him, tell him that everything would be all right, and that they wouldn't leave him.
"Justin!!" El-ahrairah called out urgently as the boy ran out, but the young human stubbornly ignored the Prince of the Thousand as he vanished in the shadows. El-ahrairah cursed to himself as he shut his eyes and let out his breath in a quaky sigh. This was not going to be easy.
Justin, now no longer hindered by his broken arm, stumbled and meandered wildly through the dark tunnels. He was unable to maintain his bearings in the stuffy blackness, like a panicked mouse in a maze. The adolescent could barely see his hand if it was positioned directly in front of his face. As he wildly took any tunnel that had an uphill incline leading towards the surface, Justin distraughtly tried his best to convince himself that El-ahrairah was lying, that everything the Prince had stated about his need to return home had been propaganda. It had to be, the human thought, nearly choking with the bile of fearful umbrage, it just had to be. It couldn't be true.
Justin kept echoing these misconceptions and denials as he raced upwards, the hardened dirt terrain ascending towards the meadows of Fenlo. The human could tell that the overwhelming aroma of soil was starting to lessen as it dissipated with fresh air wafting down the tunnels, and the dusk turned lighter and lighter, indicating that there was sunshine creeping from the outside. Justin's breath turned into small exclamations of triumphant joy as he kept jogging, nearly having to force himself to climb as some parts of the tunnel became quite steep. If it was still daylight outside, then most likely, the rabbits were already out basking in the setting sun while feeding on the grass…and with them would be Hazel-rah and the other Watership rabbits.
Finally, Justin managed to half-crawl from the outside darkness into the very surface of the meadows of Fenlo, still gracefully submerged with the dying orange and rosy tones of sunset. The fading of the star just further reminded Justin of how little time he had left and how much he wanted to spend it with the rabbits of Watership Down. Determined, the teenager strode out of the tunnel and began half-walking, half-sprinting around the grassy plains, trying to spot the familiar rabbit troupe, darting in between the other rabbits and startling them. However, Justin soon realized something was wrong. As he kept trying to look around for the Watership Owsla, many of the rabbits who spotted him starting squealing and screaming with fright. Their cries rang eerily through the kingdom, and upon hearing them, many of the other Lapine animals also started panicking, setting off a violent and noisy chain reaction. Justin was puzzled. The adolescent thought, what's wrong? Why are they acting like this? Don't they know I'm the cross-bearer, that I won't hurt them? Don't they know I'm their friend?
Unfortunately, not a single rabbit seemed to recognize the human. Kittens begged to escape, and their mothers, snarling and cursing at the human child like some enemy, gathered up their litter and dashed for safety into the holes of the warren. Other rabbits stamped out a loud, pulsating warning into the ground with their sturdy, robust hind legs, and upon the alarm, neighboring rabbits began to dash away too. Soon, it was difficult to spot any rabbit close by without having it shriek in fright and scamper off like the wind. Justin even spotted two weasels, one white and one creamy-brown and correctly guessed that they were Sneezewort and Lousewort. Yet when Justin ran up towards the animals, hoping he could ask if they saw Holly, he noticed they too had changed. Neither of them looked distinctly anthropomorphic and alien in human-like bodies. Instead, they appeared to be nothing more than overgrown, mammoth, natural weasels, with no armor, no metal claws and teeth, and no hominid emotions and features set upon their faces. Justin stepped closer, and upon seeing him, both Sneezewort and Lousewort hissed, their fur rising on ends furiously. They both bared their teeth and batted their air in front of Justin threateningly, warning the teenager that they were going to hurt him if he dared touch the weasels.
Justin was shocked, feeling incredibly let down and deceived. What the hell was going on? He pleaded, trying to soothe them, "Sneezewort, Lousewort, it's me, Justin!! Don't you remember me?!! I'm your friend!!!"
Yet the two creatures who were once Volgnamass' fierce soldiers no longer understood the alien, unfamiliar English words from the young human. They continue hissing and spitting, frightened beyond belief and their bloodthirsty urge to attack being close to the breaking point. The sun's rays bounced off their dilated pupils, showing that their eyes were tinged with the red hotness of primal ferocity. Daunted and taken aback, Justin hurriedly stepped backwards, still confused. What was going on? Why didn't any of the animals recollect him?
In the background, Justin heard distinct barking, and the adolescent turned around to see Rowf and Snitter, the black Labrador and the white, spotted terrier dogs, yapping at him. At first, Justin happily thought that the canines were about to greet him, but then Justin realized with apprehension that their hackles were raised and both dogs were menacingly and savagely growling at him, circling around the human a good distance, as if they were cornering prey. Justin grew more and more troubled. The Plague Dogs were also treating him like an enemy, like a stranger. Justin tried to back off, but Snitter came up from behind him and tried to gnaw at his arm, narrowly missing the young human but nicking him with an afflictive scratch. With the two dogs circling him, there was no way for the human child to back away from the danger. The dogs were deadly intent on keeping Justin where he was, and the teenager was starting to get more and more frightened of the animals. It was like he was seeing his comrades in a whole new light.
Suddenly, Justin felt something hard and thick and sturdy brutally and excruciatingly strike him in the side, and hollering in pain, Justin fell, holding his injured ribs. The teenager looked up to see a fierce, angry-looking vigorous, strong, brawny rabbit with a telltale puff of brown fur atop its head. Justin's eyes widened with hurt as he sucked in his breath. The buck was Bigwig, only without his clothes and mortal body. He was now a true, natural rabbit. And a very angry rabbit now intent on hurting Justin.
"Bigwig, stop, please!" Justin pleaded, tears of hurt and loss welling as he held up a hand in a fruitless attempt to halt the attack, "It's me, Justin! Please, remember me?! It's me, the cross-bearer!! Please, Bigwig!! Don't hurt me!! You know me!!! I'm the cross-bearer!!!"
Bigwig just snarled at the scent of the human enemy, and the buck tried to cuff the child, but Justin managed to slide away from the clawed paw. Yet, another paw struck Justin painfully on his right shoulder, and Justin yelped, feeling the scratch marks open underneath his cotton garment. Justin turned around to see that it was Silver, also now in his terrestrial appearance, and like the other animals, Silver was showing no signs of recognizing the teenager as his former friend and ally. Justin then noticed more and more rabbits were starting to surround him, joining in on the attack. Despite his fear, the teen could make out Holly and Blackberry and Dandelion amongst the Threarah, Flyairth, and even the orange-furred Strawberry, all of them growling and baring their teeth hazardously. Justin then understood. The rabbits and animals were surrounding him to prevent Justin from escaping…so that they could rip him to pieces, like they would to any other enemy. Since they were no longer new creatures of the cross, they had no capability to comprehend what they were doing nor would they even have the will to remember him as the cross-bearer. They were acting upon instinctive nature…just like ordinary animals, no more and no less.
Justin was whimpering, unable to believe it, now ironically in danger and about to die by the paws of the animals he saved from Elil-rah. The rabbits gathered around closer, inching for the kill, their eyes screaming and crying for blood to be spilled, for the punishment of the unnatural infidel.
"Please, don't!!!" cried out Justin. But his appeal for mercy remained lost as the rabbits' paws bore down on his body. Justin shut his eyes, wincing from the incoming pain, unable to bear to think of how it would feel to die this way. Yet there was only silence, except for Justin's beating heart and his quivering sobs.
"Open your eyes, young one. It is all right now. I have removed you from the danger," El-ahrairah's voice rang quietly.
The young human's eyes flew open to see…that he was back in El-ahrairah's chambers, underground and at the very heart of his warren. It was as if Justin never left. Shivering, Justin could only sit in a sprawled position on the dock leaves and, stunned, flashback to the horrific events he had just witnessed. Broken and crushed, the adolescent could only just slightly moan at how the animals never acknowledged him, how they treated him like a foe, and how even his trusted allies and protectors from Watership Down were now no longer the anthropoid guardians he had grown so accustomed to. The memories overwhelmed the former cross-bearer with infinite feelings of sadness, violation, and unsettled, tormenting angst.
El-ahrairah just gently touched his nose against Justin's forehead, bathing him softly with healing sunlight briefly before the luminescence faded, healing the teen's newly acquired wounds. The Prince of all Rabbits knew that Justin's hopes and dreams to remain happily with the comrades he once knew were just cruelly dashed and destroyed, so he had to step delicately around this issue if he wanted the child to listen and return safely.
Justin's entire body was now shaking uncontrollably as his face and nose were streaked, wet with troubled distress. He had to gather himself for several moments before he could voice his anguished soul through his shattered resolution. The juvenile asked, taken aback, "W…Wh…Why?"
It was amazing how one word could emphasize so much of a response.
El-ahrairah explained sadly, "As I have said before Justin, the mission and prophecy are over, completed and finished thoroughly. Once Elil-rah was defeated, the power we shared was used to reform everything in land beyond life back to its original, former glory. Unfortunately, that includes all the animals and beasts of Frith who reside here. Now that Elil-rah's reign of terror has been broken, none of the animals have their former memories of what had happened during the war for Frith and God will not have it so. To retain that knowledge would also risk the balance of what is good and natural to all creatures here. God and Frith both intended the Garden of Eden to be free of any type of man's influence, and that includes the history of you arriving into this realm to face Elil-rah. Now, in order to keep this blissful harmony, none of the animals you met, not the Plague Dogs, not Shardik, not Sneezewort and Lousewort, not even my rabbit subjects, will ever recall how you came and fought Elil-rah. It will only be acknowledged through stories and tales of adventures bygone and past, thought of as anecdotes of fantasy, but it will never be remembered as the real truth."
"You're lying!!" cried the youngster furiously and stubbornly, "If that was true, then how come you still remember it?! How come you can still talk in English and tolerate my being here?!!"
El-ahrairah sighed, "It is because I am one of the pillars in the land beyond life, and indeed, Frith told us that being such guides in the Garden of Eden bears abilities and knowledge not accessible to other animals. Additionally, we are allowed to remember these past events because Frith wanted to remind us of how easily most of the pillars forsaken him and God, how easily they were corrupted, so that we could be repentant and regretful enough to never stray from our duty to protect and safeguard the Garden of Eden ever again."
"But that's not fair!!" yelled Justin, immediately flaring up, "I can't even say bye to them!! I can't even spend my last moments with them!! Bring them back!! Let Hazel and the others have their memories back so that I can say bye to them! So that I can be happy before I die!!"
"I cannot," El-ahrairah confessed helplessly, "for that is a power given to me by God, not of my own. It was for one time only in eras of darkest and dangerous times, a last resort in order to summon the cross-bearer and banish the evil blackness. Yet since the mission is finished, there is no need to have Hazel-rah and the Watership Owsla to remain in those forms any longer, so God turned them back to their Frith-blessed selves, into natural rabbits. I cannot return the Hazel-rah you knew because I do not have the authoritative power to do so."
"So ask God to bring them back!!" roared Justin, now red in the face, "You owe me for this! Damn it, you OWE me!!! BRING THEM BACK!!! PLEASE!!!"
El-ahrairah then looked firmly into Justin's eyes, a bit severe, "Justin…I cannot."
Justin, completely at a loss, then collapsed on his hands and knees, wailing, "No! Please!! You can't do this to me!! Please!! Hazel and the others were the only good things I had in my life!! You don't know what happened to me back home, you don't know what I had to suffer through, how much of a hellhole it was for me!! El-ahrairah, please, don't send me back!! Please! I'm begging you! You never saw what my life was like!! If you did, you wouldn't do this to me! Please, bring back Hazel-rah and the Watership rabbits! Please!! Let me just stay here and die!"
El-ahrairah felt it was time to reveal another piece of information, but unlike the others, this was one the Prince was extremely reluctant and loathe to do so.
"Actually, young Justin…that is something I must confess to you. Even though I was forbidden to enter your world again after you were born, I did not remain willfully unaware about your upbringing and your life. I…I know…what happened to you for I watched you throughout all your life. I viewed your life through the pool in my burrow. So, your belief that I just briefly visited you upon the day of your birth and then left is fallacious. I observed you and have seen everything. Even though I am sending you back home, I know what your life was like."
There was a shocked silence, and the young adult raised his head.
"You...you saw?? Everything??" Justin was white in the face, and, if it was possible, the air in El-ahrairah's burrow went down by several degrees. El-ahrairah, knowing what was about to come, just nodded once glumly.
The teenager was now visibly shaking with disbelief and scandal. He stood up, whispering fiercely, "You...you've seen every thing that happened to me?! Everything?! I thought...I thought you left to go back home after you put a piece of your heart inside me when I was born."
El-ahrairah shook his head as Justin's face turned red with embarrassment and anger and lividness.
"No, young one. I...have seen what no animal should have ever seen, what no human ever deserved to go through. I have seen every moment you cried in pain from the beatings your father gave you, I have seen the look of fear and loneliness mirrored onto your face when you were a toddler as you slept alone in your dark room, huddle under the blanket with a rag stuffed in your mouth to prevent your father from hearing you weep when your parents divorced. I understood your embarrassment and humiliated pride as people approached you, trying to urge you to get aid from the abuse you were receiving from home and school. I have seen you beg for mercy as stronger children bullied you, pushed you into the dirt and sand, and stolen what little belongings you had. I have heard every word of disdain, every insult thrown at you, every spiteful trick played on you. I felt every bit of that pain as it stripped pieces of your own heart, every shred of hope and happiness, for it also did wound my heart since we became linked ever since on the day of your birth. So...yes, Justin. I have seen, I have heard, and I have felt. Everything."
Justin just stood, still at ice, his anger and frustration at his peak, with the Prince of Rabbits looking at him intently but sadly, their bodies no more than two feet apart.
Justin's hand twitched.
WHAP!
El-ahrairah did not show the slightest bother of discomfort, but his cheek reddened underneath his fur and his head was still turned to the side of the room from the impact of the swift, angry slap the human child delivered on his face. Embleer Frith, the kid had a good cuff.
Justin's voice was thick with hurt and accusation as he said in a low, dangerous voice, "Why didn't you do anything?"
El-ahrairah just remained silent, still maintaining his strong gaze directly into Justin's eyes.
"Why didn't you do anything?!"
El-ahrairah did not answer. Justin was now screaming again.
"Why didn't you do anything??!!"
The teen, now livid with rage and shock, threw himself upon El-ahrairah rather unsuccessfully and struck the Prince of Rabbits again in the face. El-ahrairah remained as still and stolid as stone, and the blows were doing very little to break the rabbit's calm demeanor. However, this was because El-ahrairah was hurting many times worse inside.
"WHY DIDN'T YOU DO ANYTHING??!!!"
El-ahrairah just mournfully looked at Justin wordlessly.
"You son of a bitch, why didn't you do anything?!!" Justin was now wild beyond control as, like a child with a tantrum, he kept pounding his fists against El-ahrairah's torso, not caring the bolts of pain shooting against his hands and carpals, "You saw, you knew and yet you didn't do anything!! Why?! WHY?!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU DO A DAMN THING TO PROTECT ME?!! WHY DIDN'T YOU HELP ME?!!!"
El-ahrairah just looked at the teenager with regret as he gave no indication that the beating Justin was giving him bothered him in the least. That made Justin angrier; he wanted to hurt El-ahrairah, break him, do anything to give the insensitive bastard an inkling of the hell he went through. Over and over, Justin kept trying to do anything he could to hurt El-ahrairah, and he even dug his fingers into the rabbit's flesh and tore at it, bits of pelt falling to the ground. The Prince of Rabbits still did not say a single word and remained like a statue. No matter how much Justin tried, he could not make any damage onto the rabbit's body. The rage and frustrated blame was now out of control, pouring out of Justin's wounded heart like a waterfall of unfairness and anguish. He kept striking the Prince for several minutes until his strength gave out, and panting, over-exerted, the boy sank to his knees, his entire body weak, bawling uncontrollably. His hands and knuckles were bruised and had patches of El-ahrairah's fur where he ripped it out from the rabbit's upper body. Justin's gasps were mixed with his painful sobs, his hurt still deep and his anger defeated by El-ahrairah's stoniness. The now dejected teenager lamented for a final time in a hushed, strained voice.
"Do you hate me that much? Did you enjoy watching me suffer?"
"No, young child. It is not as you say."
El-ahrairah's voice was clipped, the memories of what he had seen of Justin's life threatening to overwhelm his judgment and resolve.
"You are truly naive and foolish if you think I would heartlessly turn my back on such. Yes, I had seen what you had endured, but what would you have wanted me to achieve? Appeared in front of your father and demand that he would do what was right by you? Attacked all the children and fellow teenagers that picked on you and insulted your demeanor and heart, cuffed and scratched them until they bled? Should I have whispered to your mother to never divorce your father, even though it meant that she and your sister would have been as miserable as you were? Should I have acted as your guardian and sheltered you from every danger and malicious scorn that would have arrived into your life? Should have I taken you from your life of your father and adopted you as my own child, having you to live with me in the land beyond life? I cannot do that. Even witnessing the day of your birth was a tremendous taboo, one that neither God nor Frith nor Prince Rainbow greatly appreciated, even though it was necessary to present your birthright. Young Justin, can you see that I cannot fight your battles for you? That I am not your lord and savior that can change everything to make life carefree, blissful, and perfect? That I cannot save you?"
"Why the hell not?!" yelled Justin, outraged, "You expected me to fight your battle with Elil-rah!! You had me heal you!! So why couldn't you do it for me?!! Why couldn't you save me?!! Why couldn't you be there for me when I needed you?!!"
"Because it was not my responsibility nor was it my destiny allowed by Frith!" roared El-ahrairah angrily, now coming to his end. Justin just stared back down to the ground, sullen and brooding.
"I hate you. I hate you! I should never have come. I should never have healed you. You never cared for me at all," Justin garroted as he began to sob again.
El-ahrairah had a look of regret and pain on his face. Justin's words, though said in blind anger, could not have been more excruciating. They were more unbearable than anything Elil-rah could have inflicted upon him. The Prince then continued softly, his voice as gentle as rose petals falling on summer grass.
"Justin, you have always known this: life is never fair and free from burdens. It is true for my people, it is true for all beasts of Frith...and it is exceptionally true for the race of men."
Justin just concentrated on the buzzing roar in his flushed ears as he kept wailing softly.
"But it is as you once told Acorn, one of the messengers I sent to protect you, yourself with your own words...that the pains, the trials, and the sorrows are all a part of life, that they give us strength and enable ourselves to grow and mature into stronger beings. In short, you have heard so many times that what does not kill you only makes you stronger. It is the truth, young one, regardless how much your heart tells you otherwise."
"Don't you dare throw my words back at me!" Justin shouted, flaring immediately, "You...you...you're the last person to lecture me about this crap! It won't go away! It won't ever go away!! You're betraying me! You're abandoning me! Just like everyone else in my life! And you think that I'll get over it?! You honestly think that this is something I can just forget?! I should have known better than to honestly put my faith in those lies!!"
El-ahrairah, bless him, did not falter in his gaze as he continued to look deeply and expressively into the boy's wounded soul.
"You may not realize it now, young one, and I understand that. This was a burden that had a high cost at your expense...and you have paid for it dearly, and unknowingly, without thanks or reward...and I am truly sorry for that. If I could...I would gladly welcome you to live the rest of your days at my warren, without caring how many, including Frith, would object at allowing a man to stay at the Garden of Eden. However...I care about you more than that, more than you may think, and that devotion was enough to make me see that granting your wishes to remain here would not be a gift, but a punishment and a curse. Without the protective jewel of God, you will die and vanish from the land beyond life, but even with that knowledge, you continue to wish to live out the remaining hours in happiness rather than going back to the world of men. You are waiting for death by your own terms...and I cannot allow that. God will not allow that. He has plans for an existence for you, a life in the physical world and not in ours. And it is not your decision to decide whether or not it is fair or unfair, whether it is time to live or time to die, and whether or not you have the power to decide what is to happen in your life. And it would be cruel to deny you what God has in store for you, to let you die and give up all God has for you in short-sighted vain. Though God cannot force you to make a decision, I hope I can at least convince you to make the right one. Regardless of what you have endured, it is still a beautiful life. A life that would be far better to live in than here. Even as of now, I can see the troubles that will arise because of this: there would be turmoil and anger and discord amongst the animals once they learnt that a human has been granted permission to live in their haven when many of our friends have suffered terrible travesties by the hand of man themselves, there would be arguments, fights, and order would break apart. It would be another war, but this time, it would be over you, and it would be all the more hurtful and heartbreaking and painful. As much as I care about you, Justin...I cannot ignore the safety and duty as the Pillar of Peace and Harmony to uphold and maintain the land beyond life for you. As much as it disgusts me to say this...I have to follow the greater good."
Justin clenched his teeth painfully, his hands now scrunching the dirt on the ground tightly.
"Justin…you were promised a beautiful life, but that does not mean that it will be easy. Nothing in the lives of men, or animals for that matter, is ever so simple. However, it is still a good life nonetheless."
The boy just shuddered with the icy, artic gloom surging in his chest.
"Yes, you have a right to be outraged, angry, even have feelings of betrayal. I do not dispute that. Yet, understand I could not do what you wished for me, that I could not do what you have requested. To do so would have resulted in grave consequences, not only for myself, but for Hazel-rah and the rabbits of Watership Down, and indeed, all creatures in the land beyond life as well. Allowing you to remain here would upset the balance of peace and tranquility in the Garden of Eden, and I know you would never wish that on any of the animals you have encountered here in the land beyond life."
Justin had to swallow the steaming bile of rage threatening to spew out of his mouth. Leave it to El-ahrairah to choose which reasons could hurt and guilt the most.
"After the day you were born, God and Frith had forbidden me from visiting you any more than necessary, and I was not as foolish and rash as to disobey that order, for the sake of all in the land beyond life. Please realize, young Justin, that I am not the glorified, brash, devil-may-care hero and trickster that you perceive me to be, but I am also a leader, pillar, and sage to my people and kingdom, first and foremost. I cannot…no…I will not forsake them nor put their lives and well-being at risk. However, I also cared about you as well. I did not want to abandon you either, so I discreetly kept watch over you. In the pool of my personal chambers, I viewed you growing up in the physical world. I stood by when you came across painful burdens and trials that have deeply wounded your soul. I have wept when I saw how much pain and anger you were exposed to, how deeply hurt you were by scorn and hate. I refused to avert my watch and remain ignorant, but rather, I continued to observe you, through the periods of your life, through both the joyous times and the tragic times. There were even a few, scant occurrences when, God and Frith forgive me, I intruded upon your dreams, and though you would never remember them the following morn, I empathically endeavored you with pure feelings of joy, happiness, and contentment, feelings humans could rarely experience alone. It was not because I had to, but because I wanted to. Keep in mind, it would have been so much simpler of me to ignore your torment, to turn a deaf ear and a blind eye on your cries, pleas, and hopes of a family to love and cherish you, to not concern myself over your situation and only view you as a tool to help me and my subjects."
Justin felt his sweat trickle down his back underneath his clothes.
"Do you still think that I did nothing to help ease the pain? Do you still believe that I just used you without giving a damn about your condition, that I ignored your angst and sorrows?"
Stubbornly, Justin nodded. There was a tense pause.
"But that is where you are wrong, Justin," El-ahrairah stated, his voice with thick emotion, "I did do something."
There was another pause before El-ahrairah whispered again, his voice shaking.
"I was there."
Justin looked up in numb shock to see El-ahrairah, the Prince of all Rabbits, staring firmly downwards at Justin with two small rivers of tears running down his whiskers from his pained blue eyes.
After the tearful discussion with El-ahrairah, Justin was being led further below the warren by Rabscuttle, who surprisingly, was unchanged by reformation of the land beyond life, and the buck was treating the human civilly with cordial respect and kindness. It cheered Justin a little, but not much. He was still incredibly despondent and lost in regretful mourning.
El-ahrairah then explained to Justin that there was a secret portal, a rip in time and space, below and buried in the very depths of the rabbit city that leads directly to the physical world of men. El-ahrairah himself had used it twice in the times he had to come to Justin's world to visit the chosen human. It was well-hidden deep underground, and not a single rabbit or creature knew of the hole's existence. Not even the other pillars of the Garden of Eden had any knowledge about it for the portal was El-ahrairah's most guarded secret. And he appropriately named it "The Burrow of the Worlds".
Justin, feeling that he had nothing left, went along without much argument and protest. Yet, as he followed the shape of Rabscuttle as best as he could in the growing darkness by keeping a hand upon the buck's furry back for guidance, the youth wished with all of his heart that it would not end this way. He prayed with torn agony inside his heart and soul that he would not leave feeling so empty, so alone, so forsaken.
In his chambers, El-ahrairah was also unhappy and distressed as well. He stayed in his burrow with respect for the cross-bearer's wishes. After the agonizing dialogue and after the Prince told Justin about the Burrow of the Worlds, El-ahrairah offered to be present for his sending off, wishing to say farewell and to try to lessen the broken hate between the two of them. Justin, with incredibly suppressed rage, sourness, and loathing, flatly rejected the offer. The unspoken accusations of abandonment and Justin's unwillingness to forgive greatly saddened El-ahrairah. Yet, true to his word, he commanded Rabscuttle to escort the human youngster through the warren and into the portal where he would go home.
However, the Prince of all Rabbits still could not be at peace with himself, not after what Justin had to endure all for nothing. If only the youngster would not leave with such a wounded spirit…
But it was impossible. If Justin would not listen to El-ahrairah, it was highly unlikely he would listen and open his heart again to any other creature. Except perhaps…
El-ahrairah gravely and sadly raised his gaze to the ceiling of the cavern and whispered his prayer, "O Frith, my heart has joined the Thousand for my friend stopped running today…and he will perhaps never run again forevermore. O God of all men…please, for Justin's sake, heal him. Please, grant him one last chance of respite for I am powerless to do so."
Justin and Rabscuttle then arrived to a wide, circular, snug room, coming at an end to their descent. The teenager then noticed that at the very end of the dank lodging, heavily wrenched with the odor of clod and dirt, was a perfectly circular, golden gateway. It was similar to being a flat disc of the darkest shadows, yet littered with infinite, various fair stars and sparks, twinkling, glittering, flickering instantaneously, swirling around towards the very center of the portal like a whirlpool of sunlight. Serenely, the doorway stood, bathing the room with a soft illumination of vibrant gold and yellow.
Dazed and frozen with grief, Justin then became vaguely aware that Rabscuttle was nudging him gently in the thigh with his nose, encouraging him to walk through the window of reality that would send him back to his home. Justin's face fell as he miserably stared at the buck before turning his attention to the swirling lights. With the heaviest of hearts, Justin stepped forward.
Hazel-rah, the legendary first Chief rabbit of Watership Down, immediately perked his head up from silflay with Hyzenthlay and Blackavar. The brown rabbit then stared back at the Great Tree where El-ahrairah's warren was housed under, his eyes troubled and his nose twitching with extreme contemplation. He could not explain why…but there was a warm surge of power, of loss, of warning… perturbing his heart. What was this feeling of urgent haste? This feeling of…love?
Noticing her mate's vexation, Hyzenthlay also stopped feeding and asked Hazel gently in Lapine, "Hazel, whatever is the matter? Is there something wrong?"
Hazel then whispered one word, not in Lapine…but in English.
"Cross-bearer."
"Hazel, what in the name of Frith and Inle did you just say?? What are you talking about?"
"I'll be back, Hyzenthlay," Hazel said shortly, and with that, the rabbit took off, making a beeline straight towards the warren. Blackavar and Hyzenthlay could only just watch after their friend, bewildered and unsure of what had just transpired.
Hazel-rah's heart kept beating against his ribs, his muscles becoming looser and looser with each hop, every step pounding the ground with forcible worry. He did not know why. He did not know who. He did not know how. All that the buck rabbit knew was that he was needed, and like a beacon, some divine force was guiding him, in his heart, towards the warren. And he was not alone. Fourteen other rabbits, little by little, were all making their way through the crowds that were at silflay, sleeping, and playing with the kittens. It was the Watership Owsla: Bluebell, Campion, Bigwig, Acorn, Hawkbit, Silver, Pipkin, Blackberry, Speedwell, Buckthorn, Fiver, Dandelion, Strawberry, and Holly. Largely unnoticed, as one, the troupe barreled into the tunnels at top speed. Running in single file, the Watership soldiers galloped with disconcerting, dire exigency, their breaths short, their sides aching, and their fur matted with moist sweat. Without question or even pausing to get bearings, Hazel and his faithful band burrowed deeper and deeper in the rabbit city. For what seemed like an eternity, the fellowship dove into the deeper and deeper darkness of the earth, now miles below the surface. Yet, Hazel could see a dim glow of sun at the end of the passage, and encouraged, they pressed forward harder.
With one voice, all of them, though they had no idea why, cried out a single word thought to have been supposedly long banished and forgotten in the Garden of Eden.
"CROSS-BEARER!!!"
Justin was now several feet from the portal when he thought he heard…screaming?
He and Rabscuttle, alarmed, turned to hear the scuffling and stamping of something, no, a group of rabbits, pushing and fighting their way into the cavern. Justin's eyes widened as he immediately guessed, hoped, who the rabbits were. Yet before he could get a good look, all the rabbits, as they made their way through the entrance of the cavern with the Burrow of the Worlds, were bathed with a sudden outpouring of pure sunlight, endless, overwhelming, flooding the entire room.
"It…it can't be," murmured Justin in shock as he winced and covered his eyes from the blinding illumination from all around.
El-ahrairah gasped in shock at the sudden burst of familiar magic that vibrated across the warren and into his very senses before the realization dawned upon him. With tears once again streaming down his face, the Prince of the Thousand lifted his eyes upward and whispered with a smile, "Thank you."
Justin winced at the brightness of the sudden flash of sunlight before the blaze cleared away to reveal fifteen familiar figures standing before the adolescent.
It was the Watership Owsla, once again in their anthropomorphic forms and variously colored tunics and armor, all gathered together in the cavern with sadness and relief mirroring their faces. And in the very front and center was their leader and first Chief Rabbit of Watership Down.
Hazel-rah, in his full glory, managed to smile with tears in his eyes as he opened his paws wide as echoed what Justin had once asked from him while in the holes of affliction in the warren of the Black Rabbit of Inle.
"Before you go, one last hug?" the buck gently spoke in English.
Justin's breath was quivering into small gasps, his body shaking with so much relief and joy, he could scarcely believe what he was seeing again. They had come back…for him. They were brought back, for one last time.
Justin turned to Rabscuttle with a desperate, pained, pleading expression. He begged, hoarse with whimpers, "Please? Please?? I...I can't -"
But Rabscuttle nodded, knowing that Frith and El-ahrairah would not object. In fact, they would encourage it. Grateful and more so heartbroken at the reminder of the farewells, Justin tore into the Watership Owsla where they all, sadly and miserably, gave their partings.
Bluebell managed to shove his way through the crowd first as he warmly embraced his human fried, squeezing him for all he was worth and nuzzling in Justin's hair.
"I...I guess this means I can't listen to you tell me any more jokes from now on," Justin managed to say underneath the mass of fur.
Bluebell choked out despite his overpowering urge to blubber, "I do not believe there will ever be a joke of this world that can help me ease the sadness of you leaving. Promise me that you will not forget how much I care about you, Justin, all right?"
Justin, sniffing, broke away only to come face to face with Campion, his face burdened with sorrow and wretchedness.
"Justin..." the Wide Patrol veteran hoarsely and tightly whispered, and slowly, as if he was weighed down by old age and fatigue, he drew the boy close, pressing his nose against Justin's forehead and silently blessing him. Justin heard Campion then whisper in his ear, "You would make me proud to have you if you were a rabbit kitten in any one of my Wide Patrols. You are a true soul and loyal until the end. Never give up on that, all right young one? Never lose your faith in yourself."
"It's so hard though," Justin replied, depressed.
"It always is," Campion answered meaningfully as Justin left his embrace with a heavy heart.
Bigwig hopped in front of Justin before he could decide which rabbit he could say goodbye to next. The teenager was shocked to see that Bigwig's face, instead of the stern, brave, steely facade he always exhibited, was pained and supportive. Both the human and the Owsla rabbit just stood staring at each other for several seconds before Bigwig reached over and ruffled Justin's hair gently, fatherly, brotherly. He gave a grave sigh.
"I wish I could always protect you, Justin...but you do not need it. You are far stronger and more courageous than any of us can ever comprehend. Do not ever give in the lie that you are weak, you young hlessi."
With deep breaths to quell the pain in his chest, Justin nodded, clammy and cold.
Acorn gently nuzzled his face against Justin's cheek as he also embraced the teenager with a soft, yet awkward hug from behind. Justin gripped the rabbit's paws as he murmured softly, "Life isn't fair."
Acorn's whiskers danced on Justin's face as he replied with great emotion and comprehension, "It usually never is...and I know even you have a hard time accepting that. After everything that has happened to you, you feel such outrage that nothing good ever lasts in your life, that you have to say farewell before you even had a chance to make introductions." There was a pause before Acorn then said, "You were there for me when I needed praise and encouragement...but I do not know how to return the favor. I cannot tell you what you already know...and resent. I cannot tell you that it will somehow be all right...because it won't. But I can tell you this: life will surely go on, and so will you."
Sullen, Justin nodded, wiping his face with his sleeve before Hawkbit then came up to the adolescent. Justin felt his eyes well up when he saw the look of pain and sorrow mar Hawkbit's usual appearance of cantankerous, sardonic pessimism. Justin placed a soft hand on Hawkbit's cheek, trying to make his voice sound jovial as he requested with forced enthusiasm, "Hey, please don't. Don't cry, please. I...I always want you to stay your mean, sarcastic, sniping, gloomy personality."
The blackish rabbit snapped hastily, "Cry?! Me??! Frith and Inle, you duffer! You have hraka in your head if you think I'll be crying at a time like this! I never cry!"
Ignoring the snorts of the rabbits who heard Hawkbit's remark, Justin just gave his protector a fierce bear-hug, and Hawkbit just groaned, rolling his eyes, "All right, all right! That is enough, Justin! Fur and paw, you're too sentimental!"
Justin sniffed despite smiling, "Don't ever change, Hawkbit."
The Watership warrior just sneered good-naturedly, but his green eyes couldn't hide the torment that he registered, "I don't need you telling me what to do."
Silver was already shedding silent tears as he stood upright and softly, but lovingly, squeezed the boy for all his was worth to his soft, furry chest, and Justin, despite the warmth, felt as cold and emotionally empty as ice. Silver kept whimpering as he buried his nose into the boy's hair, taking in his scent, and Justin finally said, "Thank you, for…for everything. And…and I know it wasn't easy to stand up to your uncle like that. But, for what it's worth, I'm proud that you did…and you should be proud too."
Silver choked, "I became proud of what I had become the instant you came into our lives. And maybe someday, my uncle and I can heal together and as a family."
"I don't doubt it," snuffled Justin as Silver released him in a subdued manner.
Pipkin was already blubbering and crying softly behind his paws. Justin was about to stoop down and pick him up like a baby in order to hug him as well, but Pipkin fiercely held up a paw to halt the adolescent as he stood on his hind legs.
"No," Pipkin whined clearly, "I don't want to be cuddled and treated like a kitten. I want…I want to be able to say goodbye to you directly without regret and you thinking that I'm too emotionally fragile or…or a weakling." Pipkin then directly looked into Justin face, tears still streaming down his fur. He continued, "I will always remember you, I won't ever forget you, and…and someday, maybe I'll get my wings again and be your guardian angel like before."
Justin gave a sad smile.
"Pipkin, you already are."
The dwarf rabbit cried happily at this remark as he nodded silently, maintaining himself from breaking down in front of Justin. Justin then turned to Blackberry, the inventor and ingenious buck with inspiration…and prejudice. Yet, as the boy stood before his rabbit guardian, he knew he could never begrudge Blackberry for how he had developed such cynicism and mistrust for men after being hurt in the past. Blackberry shamefully averted his eyes downward, but Justin slowly walked up to him and pressed a hand against the black-eared rabbit's face and whiskers, causing Blackberry to look at Justin's sympathetic expression.
"Don't blame yourself," Justin murmured, "I don't."
Blackberry replied, "You have every right to, young one…and to be brutally honest, a…a part of me still regrets for standing up for you and losing my standing with Flyairth."
Justin wasn't fooled, and he prodded gently, "But…"
"…but I do not regret that I obeyed El-ahrairah's orders and protected you as well as I could. I…I'm just sorry that…that I…"
Justin finished gracefully for his friend, "I know, I know, Blackberry. You're sorry that we can't spend as much time together as we once thought and that we have to say goodbye."
Blackberry became a bit irked as he tried to clarify with a frustrated tone, "No…O Frith and Inle, young one, that wasn't what I meant to say -"
The teenager then gently placed his hand over Blackberry's snout, stopping the buck. Blackberry was stunned at the peaceful expression and wisdom shining in Justin's sorrowful eyes. The human then solemnly stated, "I know…but let's keep it this way."
"You young duffer," Blackberry scolded, but then he fiercely hugged Justin while touching noses with him.
Speedwell then mockingly sniped, "Hey, you black-eared bucko, leave Justin for the rest of us, you bloody hog!"
"Don't make me come over there and give you a good kick to your furry tail, Speedwell," growled Blackberry teasingly as Justin parted.
Speedwell, as his turn came up, tried to keep his voice jovial, but there was a dead, lifeless gray cloud of doom and despair haunting his usually cheery face. Justin then quipped, "Maybe someday, we can meet again in our dreams?"
Speedwell threw the human child a mock glower as he said, annoyed, "I daresay I have had my fill of dreams after this entire mess, you little scamp!"
Justin winked, smiling, and Speedwell then roared before grabbing Justin in a bear-hug and nuzzled him with great, tender affection before whispering, "Maybe we will, young one. Maybe we will."
Justin couldn't help smiling after saying goodbye to Speedwell, but when he came across Buckthorn, his heart threatened to break again. Buckthorn just stood on his hind legs, staring at Justin silently with a single look of concentrated misery and hopeless mourning that Justin could not help but be reminded of how painful it was to leave the land beyond life. Buckthorn's crystal-blue eyes were brimming with tears and the buck looked so old, weary…and alone. Knowing words were not the rabbit's forte, the teenager just wordlessly walked over to the rabbit, and Buckthorn nearly grabbed him and clung on tightly, as if he was drowning in an endless sea and Justin was the only life preserver. Justin could feel the rabbit warrior's strength nearly crushing him, but he managed to tell Buckthorn underneath the mass of fur, "I wish I didn't have to go either."
Buckthorn let out a shuddering sigh, his body quaking. But Justin then said softly, "But you're not alone. The others of the Watership Owsla care for you, just like how you care for them."
"I know," Buckthorn simply, and dejectedly, answered. But as Justin left, Buckthorn's paw lingered for a moment on the human's shoulder, as if he wanted a few more precious seconds of this time to remain.
Fiver, despite the sadness, had a look of peaceful resignation and acceptance, as if he already knew this was to happen (and most likely, he probably did). As Justin knelt down on one knee to give the Owsla seer one last hug, Fiver whispered, quoting a sentence from the story 'Watership Down', "There is not a day or a night but a doe offers her life for her kittens, or some honest captain of Owsla his life for his Chief Rabbit's. Sometimes it is taken, sometimes it is not. But there is no bargain, for here what is is what must be."
"I just wish it was in this case," whined Justin unintentionally, "It's so hard, asking me to leave a place where I felt really happy, where I felt loved and accepted."
Fiver then compassionately looked at the chosen human before he said mysteriously, "The sun will rise and set, the grass shall grow and die, and so too, will pass your era of sadness and loneliness and guilt."
"Is that a guess or a promise?" Justin wasn't sure he would put his entire faith on that. Fiver, understanding the doubt caused by the hurt and anger, replied gently, "It is whatever you make it out to be, young Justin."
As Dandelion came up to Justin, the golden storyteller then took Justin's hands in his own paws as he spoke with the passion only a true poet and storyteller could invoke, "The story is finished now, the chronicles are at the very end. I…I would be honored if I could be the one, lone rabbit to spread the tales of our adventures to all the creatures in the land beyond life. But…I will not do it if it does not have your blessings, young one."
Justin nodded and then he felt the tears roll out of his eyes as he grasped Dandelion around the waist and said hoarsely, "It will be a wonderful story, and I know you'll do it justice. I just wish I could hear you tell it in the Great Hall of El-ahrairah's warren."
Dandelion hugged the teenager back, whispering lovingly, "Perhaps someday, this story will also be told to the men of your world, my first and special kitten. Take care of yourself, for all our sakes."
Strawberry then came up wordlessly with his head bowed in sadness and regret.
"Sometimes, following the greater good is not always beneficial," Strawberry supplicated meaningfully, "especially if it comes at one's expense."
Justin frowned to himself at the memory of him screaming and ranting at El-ahrairah for forcing him to go back home. The adolescent gripped his elbows tightly, saying with icy resentment, "It didn't stop El-ahrairah from doing it though."
Justin then felt Strawberry lift his chin up with one paw in order to force the human to look into the rabbit's eyes to convey the full message, "And El-ahrairah did not wish to. Please, for Frith's sake, Justin. Do not let this turn you into a bitter and mistrustful person, letting it cloud the soul of the boy I have loved and truly cared for with all my desired heart and confidence. It was what turned Cowslip and Silverweed into the monsters they were under Elil-rah, and I certainly do not wish for it to happen to you as well. And I know how you feel in addition, young one. Betrayal and abandonment will always hurt."
Justin's eyes welled again at this but then Strawberry said the next sentence with such great vigor and ardor that the human child would never be able to forget it.
"But you are not being abandoned, Justin. You are being let go…to wander and find another, and most likely better, path for you to journey on. Abandonment and liberation are two different things, young one." Conflicted, Justin could honestly say he didn't feel as bad as before while Strawberry touched noses with him.
Holly was the second to last, and the whiskered, gray rabbit truly seemed to be worn out and elderly with fatigue and woe. He appeared to be like a wretched grandfather who had to see his own grandchild die before him, wasting away the child's potential years of vitality and youth and happiness. Yet Holly managed to embrace Justin lovingly without giving in to his grief. With steely resolve, Holly sighed with fondness, "Do you remember when Damien injured me and how I was so wounded, I could not travel and had to be left behind from the mission? You did not leave me, even though it could have been easier. I…I just wish I could do the same for you now. Please forgive me for not being able to."
"I don't blame you, Holly," Justin choked, "but I wish you could come with me too. You've been more of a father to me than my own biological father, and I hate the fact that he is what I will be going back to."
"And I as well, my young friend," Holly murmured, "Just remember us and how proud you have made all of us, especially El-ahrairah and God. Remember that. And I will tell Sneezewort and Lousewort that you have said farewell. Even if they do not remember you, they would miss you all the same for they love you as well."
"Thank you," whispered Justin. Then he came face to face with the last rabbit to say valediction to. Hazel, with eternal sadness in his eyes, opened his paws, and Justin let the benevolent leader embrace him for one final time. All the memories of his adventures, his trials, his many moments of laughter, happiness, contentment, peace, and safety under the wing of his Watership guardians and protectors were overwhelming. Inundated, Justin could only whimper as he started to weep again, mumbling softly, "I think I'll miss you the most of all, Hazel."
Hazel was silent during this, pondering, as he felt the cold body of Justin grasp his torso desperately. But with a heavy heart and sorrowful eyes, the first Chief Rabbit of Watership Down then murmured a single statement in Lapine to symbolize the apotheosis of how he and the rest of the rabbit Owsla felt.
"U vahra ma, rusati ma, ven atha ma," Hazel whispered tenderly in Justin's ear.
The other rabbits, hearing this with their sharp ears, then all whispered solemnly, repeating the very same statement in a chorus of formal reverence and regard.
"U vahra ma, rusati ma, ven atha ma."
Justin, confused at the unfamiliar language, lifted his face up slowly to stare at Hazel and the others in bewilderment.
"What...what did that mean?" Justin whimpered, sniffing.
" 'U vahra ma, rusati ma, ven atha ma' is an old adage of rabbits, " Hazel explained softly, touching the adolescent's cheek gently by the pads of his paw, "It literally means, 'My friend, my brother, in my heart' and it is only used in times of showing utmost respect, loyalty, and honor, not to be taken lightly."
Holly, with a glum expression, choked, "When rabbits feel a strong bond with those they care about, it is used to declare that particular creature to be their brother, their family, in their hearts. It means that you, young one, are literally our rusatitha, our 'heart-brother'. And you'll always be our brother, regardless of whether or not you are a rabbit."
Campion then said in a tight, strained voice, "It basically means to say...we love you, and we will never forget you."
Strawberry snuffled, trying his best not to give in to the grief, "Our hearts are now one. We will always be in your heart, just as you will always have a prized place in ours."
Acorn then spoke with his head bowed down, not willing to allow the cross-bearer to glimpse at the pain hammered into his facial features, "We may never see each other again...but we will never forget each other."
"No matter what, our hearts will always bring us back together again," Buckthorn said, scuffling nervously.
"Oh god," sobbed Justin, now feeling a fresh, new wave of tears to break from the infinite dam of sadness. And the teenager wasn't the only one. Hazel and the rest of the rabbits were crying silently. Dandelion, Hawkbit, Bluebell, Pipkin and Speedwell were all bawling without restraint and hugging each other in an awkward, yet humorous, fashion.
Rabscuttle then said something unintelligible in Lapine, but with an urgent tone, and the teen did not need anyone to translate for him that he must go now. In a few minutes, the very last traces of the sun would be extinguished, and either Justin took the path back home, or he would die. The rabbits of the Watership Owsla looked at each other uncomfortably and reluctantly before turning to Justin.
"Justin, go," Hazel said, and this time, unlike when Justin and Hazel were at the very openings of the holes of affliction in the warren of the Black Rabbit of Inle, Hazel's voice was not forceful or sharp.
Justin just stood there, still and unmovable, hesitating. He could refuse right now. He really could just accept death right then and there. None of the rabbits could stop him.
"Justin??" Bluebell's voice was a bit fearful, and Acorn and Pipkin were starting to show traces of alarm in their complexions.
The human adolescent still stood there stubbornly.
"Justin, for Frith's sake and for yours, go back home," Bigwig gently ordered.
Their friend ignored the plea and just remained standing where he was. The sun was now about to go out and the dusk of nightfall was descending upon the fields of Fenlo lower and lower. Holly, Campion, and Bigwig looked as if they were ready to run up to their friend and throw him into the swirling gate of light. Yet Hazel then said the final words Justin would ever heard from the land beyond life.
"Saying goodbye is not the end, young cross-bearer," Hazel commented with great love and understanding, "If there is a way, it shall happen."
His flesh feeling like burdened lead, Justin then tore off into the aura of swirling sunlight and plunged into the portal. With a whoosh, he felt a sudden pull of force gripped all over his body as he speed into a chasm of black nothingness followed by the inviting gleam of blazing warmth at the end of the tunnel. The brief sensation of flying at incredible speeds, and then, the teenager lost consciousness once again as the light overcame him.