Chapter 11- Message from the past
Rating: PG
Spoilers: NoneSeason: After season 6 (contains Daniel) but no spoilers
Summary: Sara turns up at Jack's house, with a few things to tell him
Pairings: Sam/Jack
Disclaimer: None of these people belong to me (sadly)Author's Note: Seriously we're coming in to land now guys, I really enjoyed writing this chapter, so hope you enjoy reading it ;) Sorry it took a while, I've been on holiday.
Tentatively Sara knocked on the front door of Jack's house and braced herself as she heard footsteps from inside. She hadn't seen him for at least two years now, the last time they had just bumped into each other. It hadn't been awkward, just sad, distant memories had surfaced but it hadn't been unbearable. They'd both moved on in their lives, things were better, and she hoped that would still be the case.
She took deep breath as the door opened, but the sight that greeted her was an unexpected one.
A tall, slender woman, probably slightly younger than herself, with short blonde hair stood in Jack's hallway. She held a young baby against her.
"Oh, erm..." A thought crossed Sara's mind, "Does Jack O'Neill still live here?"
"Yes he does." Sam replied smiling, she recognised the woman, but couldn't quite remember why, "Did you want to talk to him or can I take a message?"
"Err, I'm..."
"Sara." Sam finished for her as she suddenly realised, "Sorry," she added embarrassed, "I didn't recognise you." She rushed, suddenly feeling very awkward.
"Have I met you before? Sorry I'm awful with faces."
"Not really, I just..." She pointed behind her, "There's a picture."
"Ah right."
"Jack's just gone out for a minute, he'll be back in 5 minutes, do you want to come in and wait?"
"If that's okay?" Sara replied slowly, she wasn't sure what to make of all this. Was this woman Jack's girlfriend? His wife? And the baby...?
As they entered the kitchen Sara strained to see if she could spot a wedding ring, but as far as she could tell the woman's hand was bare.
"Would you like some coffee?"
"Water is fine." She smiled sitting down at the table.
Sam placed Carmen in her seat on the floor, "I'm Sam Carter by the way." She said as she passed Sara her drink
"How do you know Jack?" Sara ventured.
"We work together."
"You're military?" She was surprised.
Sam laughed, "Yeah."
"And Jack's what... your team mate?"
"Yeah, my commanding officer actually." She added.
"That can't be easy, having him as your boss." Sara said, thinking of the stubborn Jack O'Neill she'd known.
"At times," Sam admitted, "But he's a good leader."
"Right." Sara replied, that was what they'd always said 'he's a good leader, a brilliant soldier, the best at what he does' but somehow that never made up for all the lonely nights she'd spent at home, wondering if tonight would be the night she received that dreaded phone call. Three times the call had come, leaving her distressed and in tears. Each time she'd got him back, but each time she'd felt she'd lost another bit of him. When he'd left on that last mission, just after Charlie had...just after they'd lost Charlie, when he'd left, she'd known it would be for the last time. Even if he made it back, they would never be together again.
'I think it's best to admit we're finished' She'd told him a few days after he'd got back, and he hadn't argued. That was how it had ended, the relationship that had started so full of hope and promise. The excitement had vanished, the hope disappeared until all that was left was a hollowed out shell of a man who used to be her husband.
She glanced round the room, at the highchair, baby chair, and woman's shoes – she still didn't really understand. If she was just a co-worker, then...
Sam could see that Sara was going to need more of an explanation, and she was right.
"So... err how come you're living here?"
Sam was ready, "I got quite ill after Carmen was born, couldn't cope alone, so Jack offered to let me board for a while, while I'm recovering."
"Oh right, I'm sorry. So your daughter is called Carmen?"
"Yeah."
"Very pretty, could I hold her?"
"Sure." later Sam thought how she couldn't really have said no, it was impossible to look at Sara without thinking about Charlie, about the pain she must have gone through. She wondered if it still hurt, if she still woke up missing him. She'd nearly lost Carmen, but still she couldn't imagine the pain of losing your child...
Holding the tiny baby, Sara was painfully reminded of her short-lived motherhood. She wondered why Carmen's dad hadn't helped Sam, but didn't feel it was her place to ask. It didn't sound like it was Jack, she knew the rules in the military and she was sure Jack would have told her if he had a daughter...
"I'm back!" She jumped as she heard the front door slam shut; Jack's familiar voice rang out, sparking off a million memories.
"I got the bread – and there was this guy selling sun glasses..." He continued talking loudly to himself.
"I asked if he had any Carmen's size but he didn't think there was much of a market for sunglasses for 8 week old babies. So then of course I had to explain how my daughter had inherited super cool genes from me, so sunglasses were essential. To cut a long story short, I didn't get the glasses but I got the bread." He entered the kitchen holding the loaf triumphantly.
"Sara." he said suddenly as his eyes fell on the figure he'd assumed was Sam.
"Ah... I'll just put Carmen to bed." Sam mumbled, taking Carmen out of Sara's arms and hurrying out of the room.
"So..." Sara said once Sam had gone, "Were you ever planning on telling me you had a daughter? I know we're not exactly close anymore but I'd have thought that was the kind of thing you'd tell me."
"I'm sorry, I was going to, it just happened so fast, I haven't had time to think."
"I know how long it takes to have a baby – 9 months, and she's 8 weeks old. Surely you could have found time to drop me a little note?"
"Sara, it's complicated, please believe me I was going to call you..."
"Complicated? Because you work with Sam?"
"Sort of."
"You're not allowed to be together."
"That's not the point."
"So what was it? A one-night stand? A mistake?"
"Look I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I really don't want to talk about this."
"It wasn't a one off was it?" Sara said with sudden realisation, "You love her."
Jack mentally cursed himself, he may not have seen Sara for near 2 years but she could still read him like a book. It was a trait that Sam shared with her, and something that often meant Sam reminded him of Sara.
He looked at the ground, "Yeah..." He said softly, there was no point in lying.
"I'm sorry." Sara softened, "I didn't mean to get mad before – it was just a shock, you know?"
"I realise."
"I actually came here to tell you something, I'm getting married."
"Married?"
"Yeah."
"Wow."
"I wanted to tell you myself."
"That's big, who to?"
"This guy, Tony, he's a writer, we've been together a few years now."
"That's great, I'm happy for you." And he genuinely was.
"Thanks Jack." she smiled, seeing his sincerity, "That means a lot to me, and I'm happy that you've got this family now."
"Yeah," Jack said quietly.
"Hey you've just said you love her – you have a beautiful child together, what's stopping you?"
"There are rules."
"I know about the rules, but they obviously didn't stop you before."
"That was different."
"And your job is worth more that your happiness?"
"Sometimes," Jack admitted.
"Jack, do you know why things got so bad between us?"
"Charlie," he said sadly.
"No," He looked up, "Things were going downhill before that, don't pretend you didn't notice."
"I thought it was just a bad patch." He lied.
"Maybe it was, but it was your work that did it, you were away for months at a time, doing God knows what. Your job finished our relationship, don't let it prevent you from having another."
"You don't understand how important my job is, I can't just leave."
"It's dangerous?"
"Yes."
"And you're willing to just leave your daughter home every time you go off on one of these missions? Leave her and chance the fact that she might never know her dad?"
"I don't want to, but I have to, it's too big."
"And they can't cope without you?"
"It's not that, I just can't turn my back on it all."
"But you're willing to turn your back on your daughter, and on the person you love?"
"Sam understands."
"For crying out loud Jack!" She cried, he didn't know why he was surprised to still hear her using that phrase, a phrase that he'd picked up from her, all those years ago when they'd first met.
"Is that the point?" She continued, she pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket and slipped it into his hand as she stood up. "Come to the wedding Jack, all of you, it would mean a lot to me, and maybe, it might remind you of the importance of happiness." She kissed him gently on the cheek, before heading out the front door.
'She was right, she was always right' thought Jack; he'd forgotten that about her. His mind was a rush of thoughts, thoughts of what Sara had said of Sam, thoughts of Sara herself and of everything that seeing her had reminded him of.
"Is everything okay?" Sam said cautiously as she peered her head around the door.
"Yeah," He opened the invitation slowly, "She's getting married."
"Oh," Sam wasn't sure what to say, "Are you okay?"
"Strangely yeah, I wouldn't have thought I would be, but I am."
"Do you still love her?" Sam swallowed as she asked the question.
"Always," Jack admitted, "But it's the memory I love, the memory of us how we were in the beginning, how we were with Charlie."
"Are you going to go?"
He raised him eyebrows hopefully at her, "Will you come with?"
"Sir?"
"Carter, she wanted me to go, but I can't go by myself, it's not just her, there will be people there that aren't particularly fond of me, I'll need you there." He stared at her pleadingly, "Please?"
"Of course." She smiled, "I just thought you'd rather be alone."
"Alone, at my ex-wife's wedding – probably not a good idea."
"Good point."
A/N: Next chapters will be up VERY shortly